What I do when I can't think of anything to write on my blog!

1. This is what happens when I can’t
think of anything to write on my blog

2. Recently I’ve seen a lot of self-indulgent
slide decks wittering on about:
“What I did in the last 10
years, blah, blah....”

3. You know the kind of stuff:
“10 years ago, I moved from
Moose-Butt ...
to Bilgewater ...
and got a job in the
slaughterhouse
Things were going
great until I met ...

4. Mongo
the
Pig Who
Wouldn’t die!!

5. So I wanted to narrow the focus a bit and I came up with ...
Like, Who Cares???
In the last 10 minutes ...

6. I lost approximately one hair off my head
In the last 10 minutes ...

7. I swear I’m looking thinner!
I lost approximately 3.15 million skin cells:
In the last 10 minutes ...

8. I thought approximately 49, individual and distinct thoughts
In the last 10 minutes ...

9. ... and only 0.013 of them was about sex

10. ... but, now I’ve just thought about it again so,
it’s 1.013, now

11. And now, it’s 2.013
Damnit!
Let’s move on

12. I breathed out 15 times
but I only breathed in 14 times
let’s see how long I can keep
that up?
In the last 10 minutes ...

13. Hmmm, not long

14. My heart beat about 600 times
In the last 10 minutes ...
(except when I was thinking
about sex ... then it was a bit
quicker.
And now that’s 3.013 times
and 800 heartbeats -
aaaarrrggghh!!)

15. ... and when I was thinking about
boring things my heart pumped
50 litres of blood round my body
Which is weird as I only have
about 5 and a half litres
Where’s the rest come from?

16. I drank
half a
cup of
coffee ...
In the last 10 minutes ...

17. ... ate one
doughnut ...

18. ... generated 0.77 grams of poop ...

19. ... and created
this pointless
deck of slides

20. and I’m still thinking about sex - Dammit!

21. To see what I do, when I CAN think of something
to write on my blog, come and visit
Freedom Blog...independence through internet marketing
Click Here
References
Hair - http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20060923175810AAj1SSA
Skin - http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_many_skin_cells_do_you_lose_each_day
Thoughts - http://www.loni.ucla.edu/About_Loni/education/brain_trivia.shtml
Sex - http://thechart.blogs.cnn.com/2011/12/15/how-many-times-a-day-do-you-think-about-sex/
Breathe - http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080316230101AAg2iBx
Heart - http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20071118032433AAdpaX7
Blood - http://www.medicinenet.com/script/main/art.asp?articlekey=21474
Poop - http://www.oasisdesign.net/wastewater/sewer/beach.htm