Filolongo recounts his lifelong struggles with sports and physical activities. As a child, he had poor motor skills and was injured trying to learn to ride a bike. Despite many attempts, Filolongo was never able to find a sport that he was good at. Now as a 45-year-old with few teeth, he has no money, home, wife or life after wasting his time unsuccessfully trying to become an athlete. His only option left was to become a reggaeton singer.

1. I hate sports!!

2. Hi, My name is Filolongo and I want to tell you a very sad story.

3. Since I was a little boy I have as many skills as an old disabled dog.

4. I learned to walk until I was 7 years old.

5. I never climbed a tree or jumped a single branch lying in the floor.

6. When my father tried to teach me to ride a bike I was as much scared as a cat forced to take a bath.

7. The result was: two broken legs, the neighbor’s chihuahua death and an old woman’s anger.

8. I tried to practice many sports but I haven’t found the best one to me.

9. It all seemed to be impossible to me, I failed every single move in every sport.

10. So, I surrender… I’m already 45 years old and I have as many teeth as a newborn child.

11. What else can I do? I have tried everything

12. Now I wasted all my time trying to be a sportman and now I’m really out of money or home, or a wife or even a life!!

13. My only choice left was to become a “reguetón” singer, well if it can be called singing haha.

14. Now I have as much money as Bill Gates and as much brain as a nut…