Some of my worst half-assed inventions. Some have been produced successfully (by other people) while some remain golden opportunities to make ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Details and more bad inventions here: http://bookmaniac.org/category/inventions/

1. Bad Inventions
or
“I HAVE ANOTHER GREAT IDEA!”
or
“Quick, Let’s Buy the Domain Name!”
@lizhenry
Thursday, December 20, 12

2. Steps to Hell
• Invent something
• Buy the domain name
• ?????
• Complain bitterly when someone profits 10
years later
Thursday, December 20, 12

3. alt.sex.fetish-startrek
1993: HAHA let’s make a newsgroup for posts about
star trek porn and see if anyone takes the bait! Yeah I
bet there’s hundreds if not thousands of Star Trek
fetishists! Quick, let’s read some RFCs!
Thursday, December 20, 12

4. 10 years later
Thursday, December 20, 12

5. Illegal Abortion Barbie
Thursday, December 20, 12

6. Many years later...
Thursday, December 20, 12

7. Animal Ear Hats
1994:You know, I bet in 10 or 15 years everyone will be
wearing HATS with ANIMAL EARS on them. NO WAY.
WAY! Cat ears. Fox ears. Whatever ears. All kinds of hats!
We will make ONE MILLION DOLLARS. In fact it should
happen RIGHT NOW. We need a factory! Everyone will
wear hats with little EARS. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA
Thursday, December 20, 12

8. GRRRRRRRR
Thursday, December 20, 12

9. Booby Tshirts
1995: OMG what if we made a tshirt, and it said BOOBIES,
but it had pictures of two BLUE FOOTED BOOBIES you
know, the bird kind of like a huge seagull but with blue feet
and they do a little dance around their nests when it’s
mating time? BOOBY SHIRTS! We will make ONE
MILLION DOLLARS!!!!!!
Thursday, December 20, 12

10. 10 years later...
Thursday, December 20, 12

11. TandemUnderwear.com
1996 (drunk): HEY!!! I just got the BEST IDEA. What?
TANDEM UNDERWEAR. OMG genius! QUICK! BUY THE
DOMAIN NAME!!!!! Underwear, with FOUR LEG HOLES.
This time we’ll like, find some sort of underwear making
FACTORY and it will sell in all porn shops and novelty
stores and the adam and eve catalog We will make ONE
MILLION DOLLARS
Thursday, December 20, 12

12. Years later...
Thursday, December 20, 12

13. ELBOFF
A cross between those pop up sun shields you put in a car
window, and a cup holder, but for the arm rests in
airplanes, so when you sit next to some grumpy
businessman asshole who hogs the arm rest and is chewing
gum you just whip out your ELB-OFF and pop it up! Hey
presto instant privacy and you claim half the arm rest!
Status: STILL NEEDED!
Thursday, December 20, 12

14. STATUS:
Desperately needed
Thursday, December 20, 12

15. The Catula
Move a cat without disturbing it
Status: STILL NEEDED!
Thursday, December 20, 12

16. The Sockerchief
Socks with the top
half detachable with
velcro. Instant
handkerchief! Then
put it back.
So handy.
Status: Still a bad idea
Thursday, December 20, 12

17. The Chia Butt
A chia pet.
But, of a
hairy butt!
Status: Come on,
someone make this
Thursday, December 20, 12

18. Dead Mouse Cat Treats
Fake mice in a bag!
Chewy beef jerky skin, squooshy guts, crunchy fake bone
Thursday, December 20, 12
Status: Oppurtunity, on
your pillow

19. Cat Eggs
Status: Needs Genetic
Engineering of Cats
Thursday, December 20, 12

20. Lucky Charms
Cat Litter
Status: OPPORTUNITY!
Thursday, December 20, 12

21. Cat Food Spray
• Yes, a lot of my inventions are about cats
• Dump cat food in bowl
• Cat does not finish it
• Cat wants fresh cat food from bag
• Solution: Cat Food smelling spray!
• ONE MILLION DOLLARS, PEOPLE!
Thursday, December 20, 12

22. Conductive Paint
Toilet Seats
Thursday, December 20, 12

23. Beer Hat Neti Pot
Status: STILL NEEDED!
Thursday, December 20, 12

24. MORAL
• Take my ideas... PLEASE
• Enjoy your $1,000,000 !
Thursday, December 20, 12