The document lists signs that someone might be considered a redneck, including being on a first name basis with the local police force, having a reserved cell at the police station, trying to marry a judge to get out of a traffic ticket, thinking a blood alcohol test checks for blood in beer, wearing good overalls as formal wear, owning a truck that transports mobile homes, growing vegetables on a kitchen windowsill, having a place setting for a pet dog at the dinner table, claiming pets as dependents on taxes, and having everyday feel like a family reunion. It concludes with wishing everyone a great spring break.

1. JOKE TIME AND REALITY CHECK! I AM/ YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK IF:
 IF THE ENTIRE POLICE FORCE OF YOUR TOWN KNOWS YOU ON A FIRST NAME BASIS.
 IF YOU THINK CLAUSTROPHOBIC MEANS A FEAR OF SANTA CLAUS.
 IF YOU HAVE A ‘RESERVED’ CELL AT THE POLICE STATION.
 IF YOU’VE EVER TRIED TO MARRY A JUDGE JUST TO GET OUT OF PAYING A TRAFFIC TICKET.
 IF YOU THINK A BLOOD ALCOHOL TEST IS USED TO MAKE SURE THERE ISN’T ANY BLOOD IN
YOUR CASE OF BEER.
 YOU THINK GOING FORMAL IS WEARING YOUR GOOD OVERALLS.
 YOU OWN THE BIG TRUCK THAT TRANSPORTS TRAILER HOMES.
 YOUR MOBILE HOME GROWN VEGETABLES, ARE GROWN ON YOUR KITCHEN WINDOW SILL.
 YOUR DOG HAS IT’S OWN PLACE SETTING AT THE DINNER TABLE.
 YOU CLAIM YOUR PETS AS DEPENDENTS ON YOUR INCOME TAX.
 EVERYDAY AT YOUR HOUSE IS A FAMILY REUNION.
 YOU HAVE YOUR OWN DOG KENNEL IN YOUR BACK YARD.
 YOU’VE FOUND EVERY ONE OF YOUR PETS.
 YOU’VE EVER TIED A LEASH ON A GRASSHOPPER.
 THE MOST COMMON PHRASE IN YOUR HOUSE IS “ SOMEBODY GO JIGGLE THE HANDLE.”
Funny ha! Cool! HAVE A GREAT SPRING BREAK EVERYONE, AND MAY GOD BLESS OUR
SOULS! hahahahahaha