SlideShare a Scribd company logo
1 of 29
Download to read offline
Can I find 7th
Stage of Faith
after Child Abuse ?
Table of Contents
Part One
• Can I find the 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse?
• Quotes on Faith
Part Two
• Spiritual Injuries
• 5 Dysfunctional Behaviours on Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse
◦ First Steps to find Peace and Healing
◦ Learn to Understand - Rights, Laws and Child Abuse
• Types of Family Abuse Chart
• Convention on the Rights of the Child: The children's version
• Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts
• Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts II
• Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts III
• Closing Thoughts
• Sharing Circle
Disclaimer
This eBook contains information that is intended to help the Readers be better informed Consumers
of mental health care.
This book is not intended to be a substitute for the mental health medical advice of a licensed
Therapist. The Reader should consult with their doctor in any matters relating to his/her personal
health."
It is presented as general advice on mental health care. Always consult your Doctor for your
individual needs.
Copyright © 2023 by Gin Gardner, AIC| An Informal Cornr
All rights reserved.
No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the
publisher or Author, except as permitted by U.S. and Canadian Copyright law.
Cover by Gin Gardner
Illustrations by Gin Gardner
Can I find the 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse?
Faith in a higher power is an important aspect of human existence that has shaped civilizations,
cultures, and people around the world.
It's believed that faith is that mysterious force that drives us to believe in something greater than
ourselves, and we give it a power that plays a significant role in shaping our beliefs, learn values,
and strengthens our sense of purpose. So let's explore just what is the 7th
Stage Universalized faith?
7 Stages of Faith
The life span of the every human being starting from conception to death exposes us to many life
experiences that shape us, affect us, and how we learn responses. This is where stages of Faith also
begins to take form.
• 1/ Birth, infants learn from the gentle comfort, and nurturing care; to translate into feelings
of trust and assurance of their surrounding environment. This is referred to as Jean Piagets
'sensori-motor' stage where thinking takes place in and through the body. It's the 'trust
versus mistrust' or 'Undifferentiated Faith' stage.
• 2/ Ages 3-7, children at this stage of life, have learned language and work with symbols to
help express themselves. Children don't fully understand religious beliefs but are affected in
their minds, and heart with exposure to the 'Unconscious'. Faith grows from stories, images,
other people, a growing deeper sense of right and wrong, and simple perception of how God
fits in the Universe. This is the 'Intuitive-Projective' stage.
• 3/ Ages 7-12, children are developing a belief in equality, and fairness in religious and daily
life matters, a sense of mutual cooperation between him/her and God (i.e., doing good or
bad things will result with good or bad things to happen). Religious or Spiritual metaphors
can lead to misunderstandings leading to easy disappointment in God. True logical thinking
begins to grow in the child's mind. This is the 'Mythic-Literal Faith' stage.
• 4/ Ages 12 – Adult, at this stage, one learns to identify with a religious institution, fellow
members, more knowledgeable and secure in their belief system, their religious authority,
and growth of their personal religious/spiritual identity.
Faith is shared with fellow religious members and highly inter-personal, institutional, and a
communal affair. They recognize their belief in a formless Divine being, and will ignore any
challenges of their religion/spirituality, as it's viewed as a threat to their faith-based
'identity' and able to imagine a divine formless being as God. This is the 'Synthetic
-Conventional' stage.
• 5/ Ages Mid-20's – Late 30's, taking personal responsibility for his/her beliefs or feelings
causing inner conflict, doubts, and skepticism. Their religion seems more complicated,
holding layers of elements in meaning, expressions, and confusing. Once a level of
understanding is reached there is a greater sense of being 'open-minded' yet may still find
times they're open to conflicts with different beliefs or traditions. This is the 'Individuative-
Reflective' stage.
• 6/ Mid-life Crisis, one reaches a level of acceptance of the contradictions and unknowns of
belief in a Divine being. He, or She then is able to accept the as is, and move past the inner
conflicts, and hold a multi-dimensional view that accepts 'truth'as something that can't be
joined or formed in any particular faith. This is the 'Conjunctive' stage.
• 7/ Later Adulthood, only a few people can truly reach this level of 'intense awareness' that
there exists a 'unity' with God and to all living things, and people around the world. It's said
that some sort of event or shift in mental processing causes an over all change in their faith
and view towards people, and the world.
• Faith is no longer a 'personal' experience but shifts to a 'universalized' experience. It alters
to a more 'inclusive' state towards the world, and across all religions. Think of it as a true
state of 'rights for all Life must exist and be protected' awareness. They are usually
persecuted, ridiculed, or even killed. Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Buddha, Count Leo Tolstoy
are a few that existed in our century. This is considered the 'Universalized or Enlightenment'
stage.
The different stages of faith are based on observations, and align near the psychological (Jean
Paiget) stages of human growth. We are an imperfect people so these observations are not to be
taken 'literally'. Think of them more as 'reference points' that can sometimes be observed in our
children, and each other.
Secondly, these stages are based on childhoods with caring, and attentive families. A child allowed
to grow, as is, to learn each day with family, school, church, and along public outings. Each moment
of experience filed away in memory which later may become fully understood, practiced, adopted
or questioned. A gentle life helps grow a gentle child.
IMPORTANT NOTE
Our upcoming section of this exploration, and learning about Faith looks into the
effects of child abuse and traumas and effects on Faith. If you are an Adult survivor
of child abuse please be aware these may trigger unpleasant memories and/or
experiences.
I do highly recommend that you set up visits with a professional Abuse therapist, and
Support group. Please do not leave yourself open with your pain, and take in mind,
you're not alone. There are others too. Stay strong, keep Faith, stay Safe (Virus)
Quotes on Faith & Healing
The first step to getting
anywhere is deciding
you're no longer
willing to stay where you
are
~ Anonymous
“there is nothing Outside of
yourself. Look Within. Everything
you need or want is there.” ~ Rumi
“L
et your Hopes,
not your Hurts,
Shape your
Future.”
~ Robert H. Schuller
“The most rabidly
Religious people -
are the most rabidly
Evil.” ~ Juliana Hatfield
My Thoughts
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
........................
Feeling ...
......................
......................
......................
......................
......................
......................
......................
......................
......................
"It is a Man’s own
Mind, not his
enemy or foe,
that Lures him to
Evil ways.”
~ Buddha
“A True friend is one who thinks
You are a Good Egg even if
you're half-cracked”
~ Unknown
We are Free
To Change
our Destiny
~ Unknown
“do not Judge
my story by the
Chapter you
walked in on”
~ Unknown
There is What is,
and What's
going to Be
~ Unknown
The Evil are Unclean Spirits, and
have Forfeit their Souls ~ Unknown
Quotes on Faith & Healing II
don’t follow
Herd Consciousness, follow
your Own Destiny,
Listen to your Inner Voice.
We are not to think
that Man is the Highest form
of a
Created Being
~ Bible.org
'Remembering who You truly
are is the Key to Deliverance
from the flames of Self
Condemnation.”
~ Mariaane Williamson
Child abuse casts
a Shadow
the length
of a Lifetime'
~ Herbert Ward
Impure Souls
of the living dead
shall be Banished into
Eternal Damnation
~ Kohta Hirano
“Violators
cannot live
with the Truth:
Survivors
cannot Live
without it."
~ Chrystine Oksana
“Every man is Guilty
of all the Good
he did Not do.”
~ Voltaire
Thoughts ...
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
...............................................
..............................................
Spiritual Injuries
A hospital visit will have health staff that look to delivering care for physical injuries, pain, helping
with limitations in movement, helping with chronic disease, etc., but they will also look to ensure
your 'Spirit' (religious affiliations) are included as part of your Care plan. Well, they're supposed to
do that as part of delivering their nursing care.
Harming the Children
Harms are done to children when a parent stays in an abusive home.
These children grow up to live the life they 'learned'. Every area of an
Adult survivor's life will be altered. They have led a life full of fear,
terror, and will have the long – lasting effects of post-traumatic stress
disorder (PTSD) or develop 'Bipolar Personality disorder' (BPD). This
violent environment invades, and erodes the development of the child's
own personality and identity.
Many studies have repeatedly found that adult survivor's with
dysfunctional (bad or improper) behaviours is due to their childhood trauma's endured in their
immediate families. These 'learned' behaviours follow them into adolescence and adulthood. These
are the years that a teenager normally learns to explore his/her own 'personality' and 'self-identity'.
Abusive environments do not allow the natural exploration experiences. These children have been
too busy 'conforming' to whatever others wanted from them just to survive. This in turn has led to
learn 'compliance' to whatever others wanted from them. They lose their own 'identity'. Saying 'no'
was never allowed.
All the violence and abuses can disrupt their healing process, and any experiences learning to
connect to their 'Spirituality '. Adult survivor's subjected to prolonged and constant trauma, the
more severe their symptoms (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or BiPolar Personality Disorder
(BPD) will become, and the more difficult they will have for recovery.
The use of a religious theme in abuses upon children have shown the
consequences may be more profound. “Clergy members use religion to justify
or excuse their sexual abuse of children, believing their 'good community
works ' will have God forgiving them their immoral acts upon children”
(McLaughlin 1994).
Survivor's question, and doubt the existence of a benevolent God or Higher
Power. Where was He while the child had endured abuses and pain?
I use to wonder if God seen the Evils I endured, and now 'knows' that
particular Evil man or woman. For me, I trust he knows as well as I do even if I was a child, and I
believe there are consequences for the Evils they committed upon me. In my culture, Indigenous,
children are 'Gifts' (a Blessing) from the Creator. I started life with a very loving family then was
'scooped' by Childrens Aid, and the life they gave me was full of violence, abuses, empty of Love.
Healing can be found. We just have to take that leap of faith, be open-minded, and give the benefit
of the doubt. Let your therapist speak. Go one step at a time. One day at a time. Do remember
though that Healing is not an overnight sensation.
5 Dysfunctional Behaviours on Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse
1. Series of Unhealthy Relationships,
a) Survivor's grow into adults who attract people who 'fit' their 'traumatized identities', and
are not good for them. They find themselves with narcissists, emotionally detached people,
abuse. A 'familiar' environment.
b) they get involved with people who they feel they can 'save, help, or fix'. It's a projection
of what they needed as a child.
c) they unconsciously make poor choices for relationships. This can cause feelings of despair,
and depression. They begin to doubt they are good enough for anyone. This is due to their
self-esteem being attacked or affected.
2. Complete Avoidance of Intimacy
a) Studies have reported that Survivor's may express no interest, or be able to maintain
personal relationships
b) Survivor's may prefer to not emotionally commit to others therefore get involved in casual
relationships. This is a 'coping' behaviour of their inner child protecting themselves from
suffering any potential 'hurt' with being close to someone. They may seem emotionally
detached, and closed off but in reality they do want to be loved, and appreciated.
c) Expressing emotions in words and actions is difficult. This is due to years of learning to
'hide' their feelings nor ever experiencing any affection and kindness. The truth is they are
in despair and yearn to be able to express their feelings.
d) Adult survivor's believe they are too damaged to be accepted as they truly are, and
will 'push others away'. Not physically but verbally lash out to get the other person to leave,
or they will quickly leave. Simultaneously, they feel unable to treat someone who genuinely
cares about him or her, as well as they deserve. Again, they do want desperately to know
how.
3. Void of Empathy
a) Adult survivor's learned NOT to show or share feelings and emotions. Life as an adult with
empathy and compassion for others, is difficult and unfamiliar.
b) Survivor's will exhibit behaviours 'learned' from their abuses towards friends, partner, and
their own children. It is frustrating, unacceptable and pushes people away.
c) the inability to express emotions as a child follows a survivor into adulthood as they have
no experience therefore have little or no emotional identity. This in turn causes confusion,
and an 'insecure sense of self' due to the inability to handle strong emotions which are
needed to make healthy decisions.
d) Inability for empathy and compassion can cause inability forming healthy relationships,
and problems with 'compulsive' behaviours and/or decisions.
e) Emotions are a big part of relationships. Adult survivor's may have 'low self-esteem' and
think negatively about themselves such as being undeserving. They have difficulty accepting
true kindness, compliments, gratitude, and affection. These thoughts make forming intimate
relationships, and sabotage advancing in career choices.
4. Copy Abusive Parenting Styles
a) Survivor's may exhibit dysfunctional and toxic parenting styles they are 'familiar' with
within their own families. This is due to surviving such an environment, and 'normalizing' the
constant abuse.
b) Research studies have repeatedly shown that abuse of children can, and do have severe
'emotional, behavioural, and Spiritual' lifelong consequences upon the child which follows
them into adulthood. These can also be difficult or impossible to correct.
5. Grief for Lost Childhood and Faith
a) Adult survivor's have suffered great losses due to their violent childhood. These are loss of
childhood, loss of innocence, loss of Self, and loss of faith in God. They have endured
heartbreaking losses in the early years of their lives.
b) Reports have re framed post-traumatic stress of child abuse for Adult Survivor's as a form
of 'complicated mourning'.
c) Symptoms of child abuse Adult Survivor's feel such as hopelessness, depression, anger,
confusion, and negative beliefs about themselves and the world ; is seen in people who have
not moved forward in their mourning process and exhibit a chronic or prolonged grief.
d) depth of their numerous losses, and lack of supports, veils of 'secrecy' about their abuses,
make expressing and resolving trauma's difficult next to 'not feeling safe', to work through
their grief and mourning difficult
e) Survivor's have been found to be of two views on topic of a Higher Power. One view is that
now being an adult has 'allowed' them, the 'freedom' to 'reconnect' to the belief in a Higher
Power, and the second view was that the trauma's severed their belief, knowledge, and any
connections to a Higher Power, and faith.
Adult survivor's can find healing. It will be uncomfortable, and maybe terrifying BUT they must
'want' to 'learn' the what, why, where, when, and who. The 5 W's and especially the How, to resolve
their problems arising from trauma such as fear of intimacy, anxiety, rage, addictions, and
depression.
First Steps to find Peace and Healing
Research by Psychologists have found that 'Spirituality' in Survivors of childhood traumas, can find
'healing and recovery', but, again, you must 'want to learn' on 'how' to begin that journey to healing,
and change your Life. Ask around, check online, check the phone book, check reviews.
I'm aware that one of the FIRST obstacles one is going to face, is
the $$ costs. Unfortunately, it's probably the 'best' ones who come
with high $$ costs. One idea to keep in mind, is that keep their
name for 'future' reference. You may not make it there today but
maybe at a future date. The world is full of possibilities especially
as an adult.
For now, today. We can check for a person or 'treatment' centre for
Adult child abuse survivors, and yes, they do exist. The
Government of Canada, Public Health Agency of Canada, has a
directory for 'Services for Adult Survivor's of Abuse', go ahead, type
that title in your internet whether mobile phone, laptop or desktop computer. Some serve both
women, and men (separately) while others are specific to women, and children.
Think of these first steps as, it's time to bring 'healing to your inner child', and your 'adult self' will
be there to 'protect' him or her. After all, nobody but you will 'sense and recognize'' threats to you.
You've become 'emotionally sensitive'. You're very 'familiar' with abuse, and have learned all the
'signs', but also how to 'copy' such behaviours and abuses too.
Entering an area that requires Your 'voice' and 'life story' can be terrifying but it can also give you an
unknown 'lift' of your Spirit. A heavy weight has been lifted, and will get lighter each stage of
Healing that you learn. Trust You. Nobody is going to shut you down.
It's not your fault but others still look at it as 'your choice'. It's all you have known. Be gentle to you.
Your first step to healing will be to 'open up' to a therapist, and it sounds scary. Being open to 'trust'
somebody requires 'courage of using honesty'. Remember, nobody but you can take that first step.
Go ahead, set up, and keep that first appointment.
Learn to Understand – Rights, Laws and Child Abuse
Why do parents hurt their child(ren)? Adult survivor's of child abuse are 'shells' of themselves like
walking Ghosts. They have not learned a whole lot about 'decent' behaviours. Always having been in
'survivor' mode. They do not fully understand the reasons for their emotional state, and have
'normalized' the violence they grew up in. For them, that's how the 'world' must be, and if so, they
are 'ready' for violence.
There have been Laws that have been set out to
'protect' children. Canada is a signatory to a few
Conventions that protect 'Rights of the Child' along
with other nations at the United Nations (UN).
Provincial, Territorial, and Federal laws exist that also
offer protections for Rights of the Child that enshrine
the Rights of the Child of the UN. These court cases
are handled in the Family Courts, and the Criminal
Code can address 'family violence' which includes child
abuse. A child can charge their parent(s) for abuses, as
follows;
Abuse and Neglect of;
• feeding
• clothing
• housing
It's ILLEGAL to 'abuse' your children. Abuse such as;
• hitting your child
• emotional abuse, such as, threats, criticism, humiliation
• touching your child sexually
• forcing your child into marriage
• neglect or abandonment
• exposing directly or indirectly, your child to see or hear violence
Child Protection services will be allowed to 'intervene and remove' the child(ren) from the home.
Police may accompany the social worker for safety.
Mandatory reporting is a Law in Ontario and is accompanied with $5K Fines if NOT reported. Specific
people working in these institutions, must report; Health, school, Youth workers, Daycares,
counsellors, social workers, Peace officers, Coroners, and ordinary
citizens. Call your local Children's Aid Society office.
A very tricky situation arises in this particular scene. A parent may
'condition' a child to NOT ever 'report' to the police about family
violence. Under threat of the 'unknown' if removed from home, a
child may stay silent. This whole experience with Police may add
further trauma to a child and it is factored in, if a child(ren)
apprehension is necessary.
Types of Family Abuse
Remember! Any HARM to a child or other person, is a CRIME. Charges will be brought against you,
and you may be imprisoned for a period of time. Laws from 'other' nations do NOT apply in
Canada.
• Prisons are RAMPANT with violence, Racism and ABUSE from both other inmates and GUARDS.
Leaving with your Life is not guaranteed. Refer to reports from the 'Corrections
Investigator' Annual Reports if you want 'verification'.
Unicef | for every Child
Convention on the Rights of the Child: The children's version
1. Definition of a child
A child is any person under the age of 18.
2. No discrimination
All children have all these rights, no matter who they are, where they live, what language they
speak, what their religion is, what they think, what they look like, if they are a boy or girl, if they
have a disability, if they are rich or poor, and no matter who their parents or families are or what
their parents or families believe or do. No child should be treated unfairly for any reason.
3. Best interests of the child
When adults make decisions, they should think about how their decisions will affect children. All
adults should do what is best for children. Governments should make sure children are protected
and looked after by their parents, or by other people when this is needed. Governments should
make sure that people and places responsible for looking after children are doing a good job.
4. Making Rights real
Governments must do all they can to make sure that every child in their countries can enjoy all the
rights in this Convention.
5. Family guidance as children develop
Governments should let families and communities guide their children so that, as they grow up,
they learn to use their rights in the best way. The more children grow, the less guidance they will
need.
6. Life survival and development
Every child has the right to be alive. Governments must make sure that children survive and develop
in the best possible way.
7. Name and Nationality
Children must be registered when they are born and given a name which is officially recognized by
the government. Children must have a nationality (belong to a country). Whenever possible,
children should know their parents and be looked after by them.
8. Identity
Children have the right to their own identity – an official record of who they are which includes
their name, nationality and family relations. No one should take this away from them, but if this
happens, governments must help children to quickly get their identity back.
9. Keeping families together
Children should not be separated from their parents unless they are not being properly looked after
– for example, if a parent hurts or does not take care of a child. Children whose parents don’t live
together should stay in contact with both parents unless this might harm the child.
10. Contact with parents across countries
If a child lives in a different country than their parents, governments must let the child and parents
travel so that they can stay in contact and be together.
11. Protection from kidnapping
Governments must stop children being taken out of the country when this is against the law – for
example, being kidnapped by someone or held abroad by a parent when the other parent does not
agree.
12. Respect for children's views
Children have the right to give their opinions freely on issues that affect them. Adults should listen
and take children seriously.
13. Sharing thoughts freely
Children have the right to share freely with others what they learn, think and feel, by talking,
drawing, writing or in any other way unless it harms other people.
14. Freedom of thought and religion
Children can choose their own thoughts, opinions and religion, but this should not stop other people
from enjoying their rights. Parents can guide children so that as they grow up, they learn to
properly use this right.
15. Setting up or joining groups
Children can join or set up groups or organizations, and they can meet with others, as long as this
does not harm other people.
16. Protection of privacy
Every child has the right to privacy. The law must protect children’s privacy, family, home,
communications and reputation (or good name) from any attack.
17. Access to information
Children have the right to get information from the Internet, radio, television, newspapers, books
and other sources. Adults should make sure the information they are getting is not harmful.
Governments should encourage the media to share information from lots of different sources, in
languages that all children can understand.
18. Responsibility of parents
Parents are the main people responsible for bringing up a child. When the child does not have any
parents, another adult will have this responsibility and they are called a “guardian”. Parents and
guardians should always consider what is best for that child. Governments should help them. Where
a child has both parents, both of them should be responsible for bringing up the child.
19. Protection from violence
Governments must protect children from violence, abuse and being neglected by anyone who looks
after them.
20. Children without families
Every child who cannot be looked after by their own family has the right to be looked after properly
by people who respect the child’s religion, culture, language and other aspects of their life.
21. Children who are adopted
When children are adopted, the most important thing is to do what is best for them. If a child
cannot be properly looked after in their own country – for example by living with another family –
then they might be adopted in another country.
22. Refugee children
Children who move from their home country to another country as refugees (because it was not safe
for them to stay there) should get help and protection and have the same rights as children born in
that country.
23. Children with disabilities
Every child with a disability should enjoy the best possible life in society. Governments should
remove all obstacles for children with disabilities to become independent and to participate
actively in the community.
24. Health, water, food, environment
Children have the right to the best health care possible, clean water to drink, healthy food and a
clean and safe environment to live in. All adults and children should have information about how to
stay safe and healthy.
25. Review of a child's placement
Every child who has been placed somewhere away from home - for their care, protection or health –
should have their situation checked regularly to see if everything is going well and if this is still the
best place for the child to be.
26. Social and economic help
Governments should provide money or other support to help children from poor families.
27. Food, clothing, a Safe home
Children have the right to food, clothing and a safe place to live so they can develop in the best
possible way. The government should help families and children who cannot afford this.
28. Access to Education
Every child has the right to an education. Primary education should be free. Secondary and higher
education should be available to every child. Children should be encouraged to go to school to the
highest level possible. Discipline in schools should respect children’s rights and never use violence.
29. Aims of education
Children’s education should help them fully develop their personalities, talents and abilities. It
should teach them to understand their own rights, and to respect other people’s rights, cultures and
differences. It should help them to live peacefully and protect the environment.
30. Minority culture, language and religion
Children have the right to use their own language, culture and religion - even if these are not
shared by most people in the country where they live.
31. Rest, play, culture, arts
Every child has the right to rest, relax, play and to take part in cultural and creative activities.
32. Protection from harmful work
Children have the right to be protected from doing work that is dangerous or bad for their
education, health or development. If children work, they have the right to be safe and paid fairly.
33. Protection from harmful drugs
Governments must protect children from taking, making, carrying or selling harmful drugs.
34. Protection from sexual abuse
The government should protect children from sexual exploitation (being taken advantage of) and
sexual abuse, including by people forcing children to have sex for money, or making sexual pictures
or films of them.
35. Prevention of sale and trafficking
Governments must make sure that children are not kidnapped or sold, or taken to other countries or
places to be exploited (taken advantage of).
36. Protection from exploitation
Children have the right to be protected from all other kinds of exploitation (being taken advantage
of), even if these are not specifically mentioned in this Convention.
37. Children in detention
Children who are accused of breaking the law should not be killed, tortured, treated cruelly, put in
prison forever, or put in prison with adults. Prison should always be the last choice and only for the
shortest possible time. Children in prison should have legal help and be able to stay in contact with
their family.
38. Protection in war
Children have the right to be protected during war. No child under 15 can join the army or take part
in war.
39. Recovery and reintegration
Children have the right to get help if they have been hurt, neglected, treated badly or affected by
war, so they can get back their health and dignity.
40. Children who break the law
Children accused of breaking the law have the right to legal help and fair treatment. There should
be lots of solutions to help these children become good members of their communities. Prison
should only be the last choice.
41. Best law for children applies
If the laws of a country protect children’s rights better than this Convention, then those laws should
be used.
42. Everyone must know children's rights
Governments should actively tell children and adults
about this Convention so that everyone knows about
children’s rights.
43 to 54. How the Convention works
Articles are available that explain how governments,
the United Nations – including the Committee on the
Rights of the Child and UNICEF - and other
organizations work to make sure all children enjoy all
their rights. Read more --> here
Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts
I have a mix of friends of different ethnicity, and we get along well. We have all kinds of
conversations usually teasing each other about what 'type' of partner we're going to have in our
lives. Silly, yeah, shhh! You didn't hear that from me. :)
I wanted to add some of these scriptures, and extra quotes which I found interesting as some refer
to daily Life, and you may find them interesting too. Again, we don't have to pick a specific
denomination (religious institute) that others are trying to cajole us into, it's all YOURS to make that
decision. Mind you, there's nothing wrong with attending with them out of respect, or curiosity.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Gaslighting is a powerful device for subjugation because it makes good people who love Freedom
think they are Evil people that need to be restrained. It is also a way for a corrupt system to
maintain control of the general population because it normalizes psychopathic behaviour and
suppresses moral conscience by convincing people that morality is “relative” or a “matter of
perspective”, and that some abusive and destructive behaviour is “necessary” in order to achieve a
better world.~ Brandon Smith, Gaslighting: How Leftist Psychopaths Demonize And Demoralize
Their Opposition
I think this guy hits on some great points until he
'blames' the Democrats. Remember, Right is
Republican ( Canada, it's Conservatives), Left,
refers to Democrats (Canada, New Democratic
Party, NDP). TWO very different plans for our
Society.
As long as people Believe in absurdities they will
continue to commit Atrocities. ~ Voltaire
False words are not only Evil in themselves, but
they infect the Soul with evil. ~ Plato
“A corrupt judge does not carefully search for
the Truth.” ~ Horace
Power doesn’t corrupt people, people
Corrupt power. ~ William Gaddis
A politician thinks of the next Election; a
statesman thinks of the next Generation. ~
James Freeman Clarke
Reject every form of corruption which diverts
Resources from the Poor. ~ Pope Francis
Heroes are born out of their selfless Love that will not allow them Safety bought from the torture,
death, and degradation of Others. ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon
When Plunder becomes a Way of life for a group of men in a
society, over the course of Time they create for themselves a
Legal system that authorizes it, and a Moral code that glorifies
it. ~ Frederic Bastiat
The duty of Youth is to challenge Corruption. ~ Kurt Cobain
When you choose to Understand those who hurt you, you take
away their Power over you.~ Unknown
“For to be Free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to Live
in a way that Respects and enhances the freedom of Others.”
~ Nelson Mandela
“Only the Good Samaritan seeks the good, the well-being, and the welfare of others as well as One's
self." ~ Bishop Michael Curry
"We cannot tolerate or turn a blind eye to racism and exclusion in any form and yet claim to defend
the Sacredness of every Human Life." ~ Pope Francis
“The Creator is all around us, each day and night, Witness to what you see, hear, and feel”
~ Indigenous Elder
You don't have to Trust someone in order to Understand them, but you do
have to Forgive Yourself in order to make Trust possible again ~ Unknown
To understand destructive Institutions is to understand the character traits
and methods of the Psychopaths that control them. ~ Brandon Smith
“Pride is the master sin of the Devil, and the Devil is the father of Lies.” ~
Edwin Hubbell Chapin
“Those who have Faith in a Higher Power are thereafter made Spiritually
alive.” ~ Protestant
“Be careful who you trust. The Devil was once an angel.” ~ Anonymous
“Hope is being able to see that there is Light despite all of the darkness.” ~ Desmond Tutu
People's character is their behaviour - we're all capable of good and evil.~ Bertie Carvel
“True forgiveness is when you can say, ‘Thank you for that Experience.’” ~ Oprah Winfrey
Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts II
When we see the changes of day and night, the sun, the moon, and the stars in the sky, and the
changing seasons upon the earth, with their ripening fruits, anyone must realize that it is the work
of someone more Powerful than man.” ~ Chased-by-Bears, Santee-Yanktonai Sioux
“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you,
and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things They do,
because Hate in your heart will consume you too.”
~ Will Smith
Reason obeys itself; and Ignorance submits to whatever is
dictated to it. ~ Thomas Paine
The white man says there is freedom and justice for all. We
have had "freedom and justice," and that is why we have been
almost exterminated. We shall not forget this." ~ 1927 Grand Council of American Indians
“Jesus said that the approaching end of the age will be marked by the increase of
Lawlessness--“iniquity shall abound” ~ Matthew 24:12
“The most damned of all are those who see the Evil directed on others and refuse to confront it.” ~
Sherrilyn Kenyon, Inferno
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness,
self-control; against such things there is no law. ~ Galatians 5:22-23 E
Now after their Fall the angels could not be restored [Cf. I:64:2]. Therefore, neither can Man with
unrepented Sins after death: and thus the punishment of the Damned will have no end. ~ St Thomas
The Dead cannot speak Lies in the Spirit World. ~ Indigenous
Elder
"In a gentle way, you can shake the world" ~ Mahatma Gandhi
You can't travel back in time to fix your mistakes, but you can
Learn from them and ask Forgiveness for yourself for not knowing
better. ~ Unknown
The Seven Guiding Principles for a better Life - Wisdom, Love,
Respect, Courage, Humility, Honesty, Forgiveness, and Faith is your Shield ~ Indigenous Teachings
Learn from yesterday, live for today, let Hope rise with every Tomorrow. ~ Unknown
Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts III
'Between the government which does evil and the people who accept it - there is a certain shameful
Solidarity'. ~ Victor Hugo
“When God wants to take charge of the world, he doesn't send in the tanks. He sends in the Poor
and the Meek.” ~ N. T. Wright
“to build a Society of abundance, sharing, Love, gentleness, peacemaking, Compassion, Mercy,
Faith, and joy, marked by Equality rather than Domination” ~ Unknown
They’re called ‘mortal’ or ‘deadly’ Sins because they lead to the Death of the Soul,then your Soul
will be in hell for eternity.” ~ History, Becky Little
“Any man exalts the human mind to the place of Deity and goes so far as to rule God out altogether,
that man is on the brink of Destruction. The Bible condemns human intellect as the supreme
court”.~ Bible . Org
Sin is not a myth, it is not a figment of the mind; sin is a fact. ~ Unknown
“Following the Values of your Higher Power, must be of your own Free Will.” ~ Christian
"Show Respect to all People but grovel to none." ~ Tecumseh
Those who Corrupt the Public mind are just as Evil as those who steal
from the public Purse. ~ Adlai Stevenson
“It's not a crime to Dream of a better Tomorrow. ~ Unknown
When you Forgive, you do not change your Past but you sure do Change
your Future.~ Unknown
Closing Thoughts
Now we are near the end of this Guide. I hope you have an idea of just what religion, and
Spirituality is about, and how it can give you 'strength' to survive the 'Evils' you endured, name the
evils all around us, and learn to find your own 'Values'.
As I mentioned earlier, Adult survivor's are 'familiar' with abuses, and violence. Those are, in my
view, broken vows of 'value the Sacredness of Human Life', and children are 'Blessings', so those
parents have some Spiritual work to do of their own. Maybe from view of the Church, parents taught
children, how to Sin? Got to wonder, I get curious, and talk to my 'tribe', small circle of true friends,
who help me find answers, and yeah, we end up having a hours long marathon of discussions going
on. :)
I read an article about a woman talking with her Priest about domestic violence, I loved his response
to her, “he broke his vows of marriage when he raised a hand to strike you. You are free to leave
this marriage.” Not quite the exact words but pretty near close. Churches were moving in
directions, to help with rise of domestic violence against women.
Take a step back, and see it all objectively now. All the quotes have been included to give you some
insight to what religion and Spirituality is about though not completely. Your choice to explore,
learn, and maybe join will become part of your own Life
path. You are 'free' to make choices now that you're an
Adult.
Not all religious Denominations are identical. There is
even a “Satanic Temple' for those NOT accepted by
Christian churches. Their members are usually the
LGBTQ, BIPOC, and other 'marginalized' groups.
They don't do 'Devil
Worship' stuff as
shown on TV but do
' offend' words of
God said by
Christian churches,
and advocate for
Rights. Makes me think of 'contradictions'
One does have to wonder about 'Christians commitment to
Sacredness of Human Life' when some members have 'refused'
business services, condemn others, attack them,or not help,
and others left them to die. Who says we are not supposed to
meet these people in our lives? Maybe God is 'double-checking'
on their Soul at this meeting? Again, got to wonder at why did I meet this person? Did I help? Did I
learn something? Responses say lots about 'character' of people, and us.
Secondly, we have learned some people claiming to be Christians, don't walk their talk, or live their
religion. So, got wonder again, are they so far gone from God, and 'human' values, they're willing to
go to hell? Do they honestly believe their Sins of 'Inhumanity' will be forgiven? Only time will tell,
and it's going to be between him or her, and their God.
My World as an Indigenous Woman
As I mentioned earlier, I don't go to any Church. I'm Indigenous, and our
'church', is the whole world, or at least, Turtle Island (North America).
We don't need walls, no offence to the Church members, sorry. Well,
the atmosphere could be our walls, hmm.
Indigenous peoples are victims of an 'unspoken' ongoing Genocide, by
White Supremacists, racists, and an indifferent government, since First
Contact, that's what 1491? Some are 'assimilated, and 'run and jump'
for the government.
Others of us, stand on the sides, watch, listen, lay our tobacco, share
our thoughts with the Creator, and send our Prayers out. We are our own 'Preacher', we conduct
ourselves as 'taught' by family, and confess directly to our Higher Power. Then we move on with our
lives best we can. Mind you, we all 'know' how Indigenous families were 'forcefully separated' by
police, government, and church, and the outcomes felt to this day. Many are in 'recovery' once it's
understood how their lives were 'disrupted' by government, law, and church.
Our Belief, and Faith in the Creator is simple. We send Prayers out, and talk to the Creator he's
made aware of our despair or fears, and we leave the problems in his hand. We do ask for help too,
for the times our People have Protests against government especially when they send in 'tactical
and fully ARMED' police. Anyone else 'see' a 'massacre' of unarmed Indigenous protesters on the
horizon? Sort of like, another Dudley George (RIP) of the Ipperwash stand-off, killed by a sniper for
carrying a stick.
I'm also aware of another young Indigenous man, killed for
carrying a bag of oranges, over in Toronto. They claimed he
had a gun. An investigation, cleared them.
Oranges are left on the steps of this particular Police station,
annually. Again, it's felt that government and courts gave
these 'Murderers a Free Pass'. I don't think God will give that,
to all who took part in that 'case' or similar other cases.
Time will tell though. Indigenous people know, there's a
time, and place, consequences will happen. This is the Power
of our Faith in the Creator, and God, or Higher Power for other religions. This can be yours too.
Everything you want to say, or thinking, your Higher Power will hear you. Conversations, and
thoughts are between you, and Him or Her. Trust is protected, absolute, unless you're going to
'confession' as some churches 'require'. That's protected too but is it truly 'private'? Sorry, no offence
to church members. Curiosity is not a crime. As you can see, I still have violence in my world. Seems
always from the outside.
Our Higher Power is our Choice
We may not be able to stop whatever harms
government is doing to the people (not just
Indigenous peoples), lands, our wild animals,
water, air, our food sources, and they may laugh.
Nobody knows for sure about a 'God' or a 'Higher
Power' but those with Faith, truly believe that He
or She, does see, hear, and 'return the evils'
being done to us, and our lands. They won't see
it (consequences) coming. We don't think of just
ourselves.
Indigenous people believe the Planet itself has a
'Spirit', and is alive. We feel 'protective' of our 'Mother Earth'. Who else could create such beauty in
this world, and give us air, food, and water? Even if scientists do say it's these tiny microorganisms.
Ok. They're whole different field with different views.
So, what is the 7th
Stage of Faith, Universalized or Enlightened? I must agree reaching that stage of
being able to go beyond Self, and looking to the whole planet, and universe. As some quotes say
online, 'We have only One planet, only One Chance to get it Right'. Very true, we don't have a
'Planet B'. I often silently question the 'mental health' of our government officials. They're
destroying our planet for $$$, and laugh while they 'enrich' themselves. We suffer.
According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, it
would be called 'self-actualization'. That last,
and topmost stage of Human growth defined
as ' the realization of a person’s potential,
self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth, and
peak experiences'. Some people think there's a
higher stage too. What? No idea but maybe
closer to 'Heaven' but 'Super Powers' would be
cool too! :)
I also believe that Adult survivor's of child
abuse, are a lot stronger than they think, but
do need to find, learn, understand, and begin
'Healing', find Self, Justice, and their 'Higher
Power', 'experience' life without abuse and
violence plus find Peace, self-control,
balance, laughter, Love, Faith, and beauty. There's beautiful people, landscapes and starlit night
skies, and more.
In time, they, or you will 'learn to see and recognize' the 'types' of abusers out there and all around
us. It is creepy to see them, and may 'trigger' our own 'memories', and 'survival coping' skills and
fears, walk away, stay calm. It's worse to see when they're not alone, but I like to think, God, or in
my world the Creator, is seeing that too, maybe keeping his eye on that particular person. Maybe
we are 'Witnesses?' Again, got to wonder.
Abuse, Help, Faith and Prison
So, back to just what is the 7th
Stage of Faith called
Universalized or Enlightened faith? I think it's a stage where one
goes through 'Fire' (abuse, pain, violence), survives, lives in
pain, and confusion when seeing kindness, caring, gentleness.
Our Spirit is crying for Love.
Survivors know something is amiss, may hear about counsellors
but today we can search to specifically look at Help for Adult
survivors of Child Abuse. They, or You can seek out help; you will
struggle to stay, to learn, listen, understand, Heal, then
eventually find their, or your own 'path and place' in our society.
This all sounds simple but survivor's 'know' the reality is, trusting is a struggle. What is honesty?
Speak exactly what you seen, felt, heard. Exactly. It's YOUR truth, part of your 'Life' story. It's
confidential. Not all counselling is forever either, only as long as you need or a set time line, they
will let you know or you can just ask. It's ok.
Once you've reached adulthood, you learn that nobody but you can make choices about the
direction of your Life. Some are currently in prison where they are 're-victimized' by other inmates,
Police, Parole officers, and the prison GUARDS. Yes, charges 'may' result but not necessarily. Reports
do disappear.
Whispers from former inmates suggest guards are 'part' of 'gangs'
in the prison environment, and use threats, and abuses to 'block'
complaints, and 'protect' their 'gang'. They go so far as to have
'complainers' sent to maximum security where some are
murdered. Those seeking a 'higher education' are also 'targeted' by
guards and other inmates. Many adult survivor's of child abuse are
there too.
Prison is a very 'toxic' and 'inhumane' environment, and NOT good
for any forms of 'recovery' from 'long-term' effects of 'child abuse'.
Remember, abuses may 'lead to Bipolar Personality disorder'? I'm
guessing here but do these 'inmates', gang members, or 'victims' of DAILY' prison abuses return to
society, with that disorder? Guards show symptoms of 'psychopaths and sadists' .Check online to
learn more about 'bipolar personality disorder, Psychopaths and Sadists'.
Dark Places, People and Inhumanity
So, who created them? There's 'very, very FEW 'true consequences'
for prison guards, and they know it. The 'Corrections Investigator
has ZERO powers to 'Protect' inmates or lay 'charges', only to
'report' to the government, and same rules apply to the
'Ombudsman' who can only accepts complaints, report to
government. So, government KNOWS about the abuses – why
haven't they done anything to bring Justice to inmates?
Lawyers do not help, and are quite aware of the abuses. What's
stopping them arriving as a 'Pro bono' lawyer? Why don't they help
especially if aware of the inhumanity against Black, Indigenous,
and People of Color suffering in prison? Is it truly only for the $$
they ignore the abuses? Step back, and look, imagine. If you could
Help, would you?
All those who 'complain' especially, get targeted for major
psychological abuses, beatings, denial of prison rights, torture,
die or injured to become living 'vegetables' or scarred for life. Governments, Provincial and Federal
levels, and Courts do 'Nothing'. Ask any former inmate, some may be honest whereas others, say 'it's
all good' out of fear of retaliation from outside 'gang' members. It seems 'gang behaviours' reach
into ranks of police too. The lives of released inmates are threatened if they say anything. Again,
government does nothing.
Inhumanity is very RAMPANT in prison. Do your best to get counselling, therapy, or treatment for
the effects of the child abuse you suffered. He or She, will help you understand, learn to change,
identify your behaviours, inter-generation trauma, learn new behaviours, learn the 'social norms of
decent behaviours. Do not be surprised where that 'rage' is
coming from but do learn to get 'control' of it before heading
in the direction of prison. Nobody deserves the 'Evil' found
behind those walls.
I hope I close this guide leaving you a little more
knowledgeable about Faith, and the 'importance' of learning
to find your 'Spirituality or religion' along with working with a
Therapist for your child abuse. There is Healing of the 'Spirit',
and a 're-balanced' view of the world. It is there but it's going to require 'trust' and 'courage' to
share your full story. Your reward will be You having 'trust in You' to live a Safe, happier life, if you
give yourself that Chance.
Past, Future, Forgiveness
We are born into this world, and we didn't ask, or maybe we did but don't remember? I mean we do
start as infants, right? Anyways, some of us had loving families while others have evil parents. One
child starts out surrounded with love, security, family then it's all gone, in a day. Taken to strange
places, strange people. Yes, I'm using my example.
Another child experiences pain, loneliness, hunger, dark. Both children experience all manners of
abuses, maybe with their family, or with strangers. Their environments are 'unpredictable' and each
day comes with pain, fear, loneliness, darkness. We
'learn' what we are shown but one child 'instinctively'
knows, the dark is wrong. Both children are silent
but they watch, listen, learn to survive. Try so hard
to be 'good'.
Time moves forward, and the children are older. One
child is silently 'defiant' while the other child is
quiet. School, medical Dr's, and other adults try to
be friendly, the children shy away. It's respected by
the adults, other children are cruel and may try to
'bully' them. Both children fight back but one is more violent. Their survival skills are still useful for
them. Schools keep records of such events.
Time keeps moving forward, and now the children find themselves as teenagers. They've survived
violent home environments, along with school bullies. Adults outside of home terrify them, and they
try to 'cajole' the teenager to talk but met with silence. Anger is used to chase others away. One
child is 'rescued' and sent to child protection. The other child has run away, and friends with other
runaways. They learn new 'life skills' to survive yet 'sense' something is amiss.
Adulthood is attained, and they discover a 'freedom' yet are
haunted with the past. Confusion with why some people are kind to
their children, they see children laughing, and running along, their
parent hovers nearby. They each learn about 'counsellors' and
' therapy' to help them 'change' and 'feel better'. They're not sure.
A therapist helps one young adult learn about child abuse. He or
she makes the 'connections' about abusers and victims, and
understanding grows. The other adult wants 'fast' healing, gets
angry, may walk away. Healing is not an 'instant sensation'.
Talking about the past is painful, it hurts, and has been hidden.
One young adult stays with the therapist for that 'change' and to 'feel better'. A talk about
'forgiveness' arises. This young adult learns, it's not to forgive the Abuser, it's to learn 'self
forgiveness'. To realize, that child of long ago, did not know anything, only what they 'learned' from
their 'parent or parents'. Now they must 'un-learn' all that to 'fit' into society with a clean slate, and
he, or she, is learning. One step at a time, and each visit with the therapist, will eventually end
with 'balance, finding, knowing, decent, acceptable behaviours'. Seeking Justice is ok too.
Living his, or her, life with these 'new' skills, brings friendships, steady and calm moods, maybe
occasional panic attacks, but able to 'cope' now. We learn, nobody is perfect and it's ok. Life is
getting better, life is changing.
My own Survival
I can truly say this since I too survived my early years, as a 'battered child' , a term used prior to
'child abuse' starting at 3 years old, in the Provincial government institution known as Children's Aid
Society,CAS' and their assigned 'Foster home' and then my years as an 'adopted' child in a non-native
home. I had help getting to CAS, my first round, then I voluntarily entered Catholic Children's Aid,
CCAS, the second time. Both times leaving child abuses.
My 'parents' demonized me as a child to CAS and CCAS reporting
me as an 'ungrateful' child, and who knows what else. They did
give me all the 'material' things a child could want, but at the
price of child abuse? No love, or kindness. No thanks. No more.
I was learning to be 'independent', a 'very normal' stage of teen
years yet NOT acceptable to my adoptive parents. They wanted
full 'compliance' , and I said, No. I guess their reaction was, well
' mother' was dumbstruck. I had learned not to 'internalize' her
moods or words. Stay calm, walk away.
Today, material things don't mean a thing in comparison to me my family, and other peoples 'Spirit'
and 'well being'. They are far more 'valuable' than all the $$$ in the world. You may learn that too. I
have no qualms living as a 'pauper' or 'within my means', using that polite talk. ;)
I get to make my own way in this world with or without help from others. I've met racism from
people in positions to help, and it's not the first time but it means nothing. I don't let their 'crap'
rule or affect my life. I do let the Creator know if I do feel
hurt, and do have my 'rants'. We''re not perfect but we can
still do, and give our best to self, and others.
It's frustrating when want for a better world isn't
materializing, don't you think? As human beings, shouldn't
we be 'bettering' our Society by now? If there's Alien life, I
don't think they'd want to meet us, would you be proud?
I meet people, make friends, and they do help, or help me
search for answers. True friends are wonderful to find,
and have around. They call themselves 'my' tribe. :)
For now, I hope you have learned how Faith can help overcome child abuse. Did you notice my near
constant questioning, and curiosity? We should always question the world around us, wonder why
about what caught your interest, try to bring change, help where we can, make a better World.
There is suffering and there's also beauty but Healing must first take place. Your whole view of the
world will change. One question, or observation will stand out – why do I know Evil, and the
Beautiful in this World at the same time ?
I
hope you find your 'Happy and Peaceful' Life, it does exist. You just need Faith. Take
care, stay strong, stay safe (from that Virus) ~ Gin
~ - - - Sharing Circle - - - ~
The following comments are from various Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse, and Therapists. These are
comments about finding Strength, and Hope once again after Child abuse, and to lead lives with a
clear vision, and free of being haunted. Names have been changed for their privacy.
A last note, there are online communities in Forums to start building your 'tribe' for support and
friendship. I finish this Guide with You in mind, and hope that you will find, and set your own Path,
clear and free to reach your 7th
Stage of Faith called the Universalized/Enlightened one.
'an image of God can remain intact, but it's the 'bond' to God that can get severely damaged, as well
as your sense of Self and place in this world ' ~ Lisa, Survivor
'I believed that God is always with me, loves me, and hears me through my Prayers'
~ Madeline, Survivor
'Religion or Spirituality have helped Survivors develop meaning, and find Courage, and insight from
their experiences.' ~ Taylor, Therapist, Child Abuse
'Not everyone finds Faith overnight. Faith is rarely easy. But if you've ever done a Good thing, and
felt a Glow in your heart, then that's a little message from God. You have the freedom and capacity
to pursue a closer relationship with him. Seek, and ye shall find.' ~ Jonathan Franzen
'Building a sense of Belonging with a religious community, and having a Spiritual belief are
Protective factors that can support Resiliency after trauma.' ~ Janet, Therapist
'Many clients endured their kid abuse alone, and as adults, they're reaching out for support in
order to Heal,' ~ Unknown, Therapist
“Sharing your experience of abuse is a Courageous act of Generosity that can Change the Life of
someone who’s suffering Alone. It can also have a profound impact on your life by opening windows
to healing”. ~ EndCan
I am a blogger at AIC|An Informal Cornr. This is where I get curious, research and Share whatever I
have found. Reading is an 'informal' method of 'learning'. I hope you visit, and Share what you
learned! Pass the word! Hope to see you around, and feel Free leave a comment or two on my blog!
:)

More Related Content

Similar to Find 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse

Stages+of+faith+no+sound
Stages+of+faith+no+soundStages+of+faith+no+sound
Stages+of+faith+no+soundAndrea Slaven
 
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)Mia Henry
 
Thinking with Your Soul
Thinking with Your SoulThinking with Your Soul
Thinking with Your Soulericw01
 
Fowler's spiritual development
Fowler's spiritual developmentFowler's spiritual development
Fowler's spiritual developmentSergio Sarza
 
Dillon
DillonDillon
Dillonmhcc
 
0310272661 samptxt
0310272661 samptxt0310272661 samptxt
0310272661 samptxtjoedesantis
 
Personal Development.....pptx
Personal Development.....pptxPersonal Development.....pptx
Personal Development.....pptxJovelBugnos4
 
1You note the following A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx
1You note the following  A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx1You note the following  A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx
1You note the following A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docxeugeniadean34240
 

Similar to Find 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse (13)

Refutations of Atheism
Refutations of AtheismRefutations of Atheism
Refutations of Atheism
 
Healthy Grief
Healthy GriefHealthy Grief
Healthy Grief
 
Stages+of+faith+no+sound
Stages+of+faith+no+soundStages+of+faith+no+sound
Stages+of+faith+no+sound
 
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)
The Game Of Life & How To Play It by Florence Scovel Shinn (A Summary)
 
Thinking with Your Soul
Thinking with Your SoulThinking with Your Soul
Thinking with Your Soul
 
WS1.5 VPH-DropBox-Morality
WS1.5 VPH-DropBox-MoralityWS1.5 VPH-DropBox-Morality
WS1.5 VPH-DropBox-Morality
 
Zohar final
Zohar finalZohar final
Zohar final
 
Fowler's spiritual development
Fowler's spiritual developmentFowler's spiritual development
Fowler's spiritual development
 
Dillon
DillonDillon
Dillon
 
0310272661 samptxt
0310272661 samptxt0310272661 samptxt
0310272661 samptxt
 
Personal Development.....pptx
Personal Development.....pptxPersonal Development.....pptx
Personal Development.....pptx
 
1You note the following A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx
1You note the following  A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx1You note the following  A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx
1You note the following A Buddha is a person who has gained e.docx
 
Fx april2021 what_isfaith
Fx april2021 what_isfaithFx april2021 what_isfaith
Fx april2021 what_isfaith
 

Recently uploaded

Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...High Profile Call Girls Chandigarh Aarushi
 
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...delhimodelshub1
 
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591adityaroy0215
 
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girls
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy GirlsRussian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girls
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girlsddev2574
 
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service Mohali
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service MohaliCall Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service Mohali
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service MohaliHigh Profile Call Girls Chandigarh Aarushi
 
Hot Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Ludhiana
Hot  Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In LudhianaHot  Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Ludhiana
Hot Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In LudhianaRussian Call Girls in Ludhiana
 
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service DehradunDehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service DehradunNiamh verma
 
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsi
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsiindian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsi
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana TulsiHigh Profile Call Girls Chandigarh Aarushi
 
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabad
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service HyderabadCall Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabad
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabaddelhimodelshub1
 
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...Niamh verma
 
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7Miss joya
 
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...Russian Call Girls Amritsar
 
Jalandhar Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...
Jalandhar  Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...Jalandhar  Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...
Jalandhar Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...Call Girls Service Chandigarh Ayushi
 
Hot Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Chandigarh
Hot  Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In ChandigarhHot  Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Chandigarh
Hot Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In ChandigarhVip call girls In Chandigarh
 

Recently uploaded (20)

VIP Call Girls Lucknow Isha 🔝 9719455033 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
VIP Call Girls Lucknow Isha 🔝 9719455033 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service LucknowVIP Call Girls Lucknow Isha 🔝 9719455033 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
VIP Call Girls Lucknow Isha 🔝 9719455033 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
 
Russian Call Girls South Delhi 9711199171 discount on your booking
Russian Call Girls South Delhi 9711199171 discount on your bookingRussian Call Girls South Delhi 9711199171 discount on your booking
Russian Call Girls South Delhi 9711199171 discount on your booking
 
Call Girl Lucknow Gauri 🔝 8923113531 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
Call Girl Lucknow Gauri 🔝 8923113531  🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service LucknowCall Girl Lucknow Gauri 🔝 8923113531  🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
Call Girl Lucknow Gauri 🔝 8923113531 🔝 🎶 Independent Escort Service Lucknow
 
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Grishma ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Se...
 
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...
Russian Call Girls Hyderabad Saloni 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyd...
 
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591
VIP Call Girl Sector 25 Gurgaon Just Call Me 9899900591
 
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girls
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy GirlsRussian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girls
Russian Call Girls in Raipur 9873940964 Book Hot And Sexy Girls
 
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service Mohali
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service MohaliCall Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service Mohali
Call Girls in Mohali Surbhi ❤️🍑 9907093804 👄🫦 Independent Escort Service Mohali
 
Hot Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Ludhiana
Hot  Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In LudhianaHot  Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Ludhiana
Hot Call Girl In Ludhiana 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Ludhiana
 
Call Girl Guwahati Aashi 👉 7001305949 👈 🔝 Independent Escort Service Guwahati
Call Girl Guwahati Aashi 👉 7001305949 👈 🔝 Independent Escort Service GuwahatiCall Girl Guwahati Aashi 👉 7001305949 👈 🔝 Independent Escort Service Guwahati
Call Girl Guwahati Aashi 👉 7001305949 👈 🔝 Independent Escort Service Guwahati
 
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service DehradunDehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Dehradun Call Girls Service ❤️🍑 9675010100 👄🫦Independent Escort Service Dehradun
 
Russian Call Girls in Dehradun Komal 🔝 7001305949 🔝 📍 Independent Escort Serv...
Russian Call Girls in Dehradun Komal 🔝 7001305949 🔝 📍 Independent Escort Serv...Russian Call Girls in Dehradun Komal 🔝 7001305949 🔝 📍 Independent Escort Serv...
Russian Call Girls in Dehradun Komal 🔝 7001305949 🔝 📍 Independent Escort Serv...
 
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsi
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsiindian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsi
indian Call Girl Panchkula ❤️🍑 9907093804 Low Rate Call Girls Ludhiana Tulsi
 
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabad
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service HyderabadCall Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabad
Call Girl Hyderabad Madhuri 9907093804 Independent Escort Service Hyderabad
 
Call Girl Dehradun Aashi 🔝 7001305949 🔝 💃 Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Call Girl Dehradun Aashi 🔝 7001305949 🔝 💃 Independent Escort Service DehradunCall Girl Dehradun Aashi 🔝 7001305949 🔝 💃 Independent Escort Service Dehradun
Call Girl Dehradun Aashi 🔝 7001305949 🔝 💃 Independent Escort Service Dehradun
 
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...
Call Girls Service Chandigarh Gori WhatsApp ❤9115573837 VIP Call Girls Chandi...
 
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7
Vip Kolkata Call Girls Cossipore 👉 8250192130 ❣️💯 Available With Room 24×7
 
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...
Local Housewife and effective ☎️ 8250192130 🍉🍓 Sexy Girls VIP Call Girls Chan...
 
Jalandhar Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...
Jalandhar  Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...Jalandhar  Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...
Jalandhar Female Call Girls Contact Number 9053900678 💚Jalandhar Female Call...
 
Hot Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Chandigarh
Hot  Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In ChandigarhHot  Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Chandigarh
Hot Call Girl In Chandigarh 👅🥵 9053'900678 Call Girls Service In Chandigarh
 

Find 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse

  • 1. Can I find 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse ?
  • 2. Table of Contents Part One • Can I find the 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse? • Quotes on Faith Part Two • Spiritual Injuries • 5 Dysfunctional Behaviours on Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse ◦ First Steps to find Peace and Healing ◦ Learn to Understand - Rights, Laws and Child Abuse • Types of Family Abuse Chart • Convention on the Rights of the Child: The children's version • Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts • Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts II • Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts III • Closing Thoughts • Sharing Circle
  • 3. Disclaimer This eBook contains information that is intended to help the Readers be better informed Consumers of mental health care. This book is not intended to be a substitute for the mental health medical advice of a licensed Therapist. The Reader should consult with their doctor in any matters relating to his/her personal health." It is presented as general advice on mental health care. Always consult your Doctor for your individual needs. Copyright © 2023 by Gin Gardner, AIC| An Informal Cornr All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher or Author, except as permitted by U.S. and Canadian Copyright law. Cover by Gin Gardner Illustrations by Gin Gardner
  • 4. Can I find the 7th Stage of Faith after Child Abuse? Faith in a higher power is an important aspect of human existence that has shaped civilizations, cultures, and people around the world. It's believed that faith is that mysterious force that drives us to believe in something greater than ourselves, and we give it a power that plays a significant role in shaping our beliefs, learn values, and strengthens our sense of purpose. So let's explore just what is the 7th Stage Universalized faith? 7 Stages of Faith The life span of the every human being starting from conception to death exposes us to many life experiences that shape us, affect us, and how we learn responses. This is where stages of Faith also begins to take form. • 1/ Birth, infants learn from the gentle comfort, and nurturing care; to translate into feelings of trust and assurance of their surrounding environment. This is referred to as Jean Piagets 'sensori-motor' stage where thinking takes place in and through the body. It's the 'trust versus mistrust' or 'Undifferentiated Faith' stage. • 2/ Ages 3-7, children at this stage of life, have learned language and work with symbols to help express themselves. Children don't fully understand religious beliefs but are affected in their minds, and heart with exposure to the 'Unconscious'. Faith grows from stories, images, other people, a growing deeper sense of right and wrong, and simple perception of how God fits in the Universe. This is the 'Intuitive-Projective' stage. • 3/ Ages 7-12, children are developing a belief in equality, and fairness in religious and daily life matters, a sense of mutual cooperation between him/her and God (i.e., doing good or bad things will result with good or bad things to happen). Religious or Spiritual metaphors can lead to misunderstandings leading to easy disappointment in God. True logical thinking begins to grow in the child's mind. This is the 'Mythic-Literal Faith' stage. • 4/ Ages 12 – Adult, at this stage, one learns to identify with a religious institution, fellow members, more knowledgeable and secure in their belief system, their religious authority, and growth of their personal religious/spiritual identity. Faith is shared with fellow religious members and highly inter-personal, institutional, and a communal affair. They recognize their belief in a formless Divine being, and will ignore any challenges of their religion/spirituality, as it's viewed as a threat to their faith-based 'identity' and able to imagine a divine formless being as God. This is the 'Synthetic -Conventional' stage. • 5/ Ages Mid-20's – Late 30's, taking personal responsibility for his/her beliefs or feelings causing inner conflict, doubts, and skepticism. Their religion seems more complicated, holding layers of elements in meaning, expressions, and confusing. Once a level of understanding is reached there is a greater sense of being 'open-minded' yet may still find times they're open to conflicts with different beliefs or traditions. This is the 'Individuative- Reflective' stage.
  • 5. • 6/ Mid-life Crisis, one reaches a level of acceptance of the contradictions and unknowns of belief in a Divine being. He, or She then is able to accept the as is, and move past the inner conflicts, and hold a multi-dimensional view that accepts 'truth'as something that can't be joined or formed in any particular faith. This is the 'Conjunctive' stage. • 7/ Later Adulthood, only a few people can truly reach this level of 'intense awareness' that there exists a 'unity' with God and to all living things, and people around the world. It's said that some sort of event or shift in mental processing causes an over all change in their faith and view towards people, and the world. • Faith is no longer a 'personal' experience but shifts to a 'universalized' experience. It alters to a more 'inclusive' state towards the world, and across all religions. Think of it as a true state of 'rights for all Life must exist and be protected' awareness. They are usually persecuted, ridiculed, or even killed. Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Buddha, Count Leo Tolstoy are a few that existed in our century. This is considered the 'Universalized or Enlightenment' stage. The different stages of faith are based on observations, and align near the psychological (Jean Paiget) stages of human growth. We are an imperfect people so these observations are not to be taken 'literally'. Think of them more as 'reference points' that can sometimes be observed in our children, and each other. Secondly, these stages are based on childhoods with caring, and attentive families. A child allowed to grow, as is, to learn each day with family, school, church, and along public outings. Each moment of experience filed away in memory which later may become fully understood, practiced, adopted or questioned. A gentle life helps grow a gentle child. IMPORTANT NOTE Our upcoming section of this exploration, and learning about Faith looks into the effects of child abuse and traumas and effects on Faith. If you are an Adult survivor of child abuse please be aware these may trigger unpleasant memories and/or experiences. I do highly recommend that you set up visits with a professional Abuse therapist, and Support group. Please do not leave yourself open with your pain, and take in mind, you're not alone. There are others too. Stay strong, keep Faith, stay Safe (Virus)
  • 6. Quotes on Faith & Healing The first step to getting anywhere is deciding you're no longer willing to stay where you are ~ Anonymous “there is nothing Outside of yourself. Look Within. Everything you need or want is there.” ~ Rumi “L et your Hopes, not your Hurts, Shape your Future.” ~ Robert H. Schuller “The most rabidly Religious people - are the most rabidly Evil.” ~ Juliana Hatfield My Thoughts ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ ........................ Feeling ... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... ...................... "It is a Man’s own Mind, not his enemy or foe, that Lures him to Evil ways.” ~ Buddha “A True friend is one who thinks You are a Good Egg even if you're half-cracked” ~ Unknown We are Free To Change our Destiny ~ Unknown “do not Judge my story by the Chapter you walked in on” ~ Unknown There is What is, and What's going to Be ~ Unknown The Evil are Unclean Spirits, and have Forfeit their Souls ~ Unknown
  • 7. Quotes on Faith & Healing II don’t follow Herd Consciousness, follow your Own Destiny, Listen to your Inner Voice. We are not to think that Man is the Highest form of a Created Being ~ Bible.org 'Remembering who You truly are is the Key to Deliverance from the flames of Self Condemnation.” ~ Mariaane Williamson Child abuse casts a Shadow the length of a Lifetime' ~ Herbert Ward Impure Souls of the living dead shall be Banished into Eternal Damnation ~ Kohta Hirano “Violators cannot live with the Truth: Survivors cannot Live without it." ~ Chrystine Oksana “Every man is Guilty of all the Good he did Not do.” ~ Voltaire Thoughts ... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ............................................... ..............................................
  • 8. Spiritual Injuries A hospital visit will have health staff that look to delivering care for physical injuries, pain, helping with limitations in movement, helping with chronic disease, etc., but they will also look to ensure your 'Spirit' (religious affiliations) are included as part of your Care plan. Well, they're supposed to do that as part of delivering their nursing care. Harming the Children Harms are done to children when a parent stays in an abusive home. These children grow up to live the life they 'learned'. Every area of an Adult survivor's life will be altered. They have led a life full of fear, terror, and will have the long – lasting effects of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or develop 'Bipolar Personality disorder' (BPD). This violent environment invades, and erodes the development of the child's own personality and identity. Many studies have repeatedly found that adult survivor's with dysfunctional (bad or improper) behaviours is due to their childhood trauma's endured in their immediate families. These 'learned' behaviours follow them into adolescence and adulthood. These are the years that a teenager normally learns to explore his/her own 'personality' and 'self-identity'. Abusive environments do not allow the natural exploration experiences. These children have been too busy 'conforming' to whatever others wanted from them just to survive. This in turn has led to learn 'compliance' to whatever others wanted from them. They lose their own 'identity'. Saying 'no' was never allowed. All the violence and abuses can disrupt their healing process, and any experiences learning to connect to their 'Spirituality '. Adult survivor's subjected to prolonged and constant trauma, the more severe their symptoms (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or BiPolar Personality Disorder (BPD) will become, and the more difficult they will have for recovery. The use of a religious theme in abuses upon children have shown the consequences may be more profound. “Clergy members use religion to justify or excuse their sexual abuse of children, believing their 'good community works ' will have God forgiving them their immoral acts upon children” (McLaughlin 1994). Survivor's question, and doubt the existence of a benevolent God or Higher Power. Where was He while the child had endured abuses and pain? I use to wonder if God seen the Evils I endured, and now 'knows' that particular Evil man or woman. For me, I trust he knows as well as I do even if I was a child, and I believe there are consequences for the Evils they committed upon me. In my culture, Indigenous, children are 'Gifts' (a Blessing) from the Creator. I started life with a very loving family then was 'scooped' by Childrens Aid, and the life they gave me was full of violence, abuses, empty of Love. Healing can be found. We just have to take that leap of faith, be open-minded, and give the benefit of the doubt. Let your therapist speak. Go one step at a time. One day at a time. Do remember though that Healing is not an overnight sensation.
  • 9. 5 Dysfunctional Behaviours on Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse 1. Series of Unhealthy Relationships, a) Survivor's grow into adults who attract people who 'fit' their 'traumatized identities', and are not good for them. They find themselves with narcissists, emotionally detached people, abuse. A 'familiar' environment. b) they get involved with people who they feel they can 'save, help, or fix'. It's a projection of what they needed as a child. c) they unconsciously make poor choices for relationships. This can cause feelings of despair, and depression. They begin to doubt they are good enough for anyone. This is due to their self-esteem being attacked or affected. 2. Complete Avoidance of Intimacy a) Studies have reported that Survivor's may express no interest, or be able to maintain personal relationships b) Survivor's may prefer to not emotionally commit to others therefore get involved in casual relationships. This is a 'coping' behaviour of their inner child protecting themselves from suffering any potential 'hurt' with being close to someone. They may seem emotionally detached, and closed off but in reality they do want to be loved, and appreciated. c) Expressing emotions in words and actions is difficult. This is due to years of learning to 'hide' their feelings nor ever experiencing any affection and kindness. The truth is they are in despair and yearn to be able to express their feelings. d) Adult survivor's believe they are too damaged to be accepted as they truly are, and will 'push others away'. Not physically but verbally lash out to get the other person to leave, or they will quickly leave. Simultaneously, they feel unable to treat someone who genuinely cares about him or her, as well as they deserve. Again, they do want desperately to know how.
  • 10. 3. Void of Empathy a) Adult survivor's learned NOT to show or share feelings and emotions. Life as an adult with empathy and compassion for others, is difficult and unfamiliar. b) Survivor's will exhibit behaviours 'learned' from their abuses towards friends, partner, and their own children. It is frustrating, unacceptable and pushes people away. c) the inability to express emotions as a child follows a survivor into adulthood as they have no experience therefore have little or no emotional identity. This in turn causes confusion, and an 'insecure sense of self' due to the inability to handle strong emotions which are needed to make healthy decisions. d) Inability for empathy and compassion can cause inability forming healthy relationships, and problems with 'compulsive' behaviours and/or decisions. e) Emotions are a big part of relationships. Adult survivor's may have 'low self-esteem' and think negatively about themselves such as being undeserving. They have difficulty accepting true kindness, compliments, gratitude, and affection. These thoughts make forming intimate relationships, and sabotage advancing in career choices. 4. Copy Abusive Parenting Styles a) Survivor's may exhibit dysfunctional and toxic parenting styles they are 'familiar' with within their own families. This is due to surviving such an environment, and 'normalizing' the constant abuse. b) Research studies have repeatedly shown that abuse of children can, and do have severe 'emotional, behavioural, and Spiritual' lifelong consequences upon the child which follows them into adulthood. These can also be difficult or impossible to correct. 5. Grief for Lost Childhood and Faith a) Adult survivor's have suffered great losses due to their violent childhood. These are loss of childhood, loss of innocence, loss of Self, and loss of faith in God. They have endured heartbreaking losses in the early years of their lives. b) Reports have re framed post-traumatic stress of child abuse for Adult Survivor's as a form of 'complicated mourning'. c) Symptoms of child abuse Adult Survivor's feel such as hopelessness, depression, anger, confusion, and negative beliefs about themselves and the world ; is seen in people who have not moved forward in their mourning process and exhibit a chronic or prolonged grief. d) depth of their numerous losses, and lack of supports, veils of 'secrecy' about their abuses, make expressing and resolving trauma's difficult next to 'not feeling safe', to work through their grief and mourning difficult e) Survivor's have been found to be of two views on topic of a Higher Power. One view is that now being an adult has 'allowed' them, the 'freedom' to 'reconnect' to the belief in a Higher Power, and the second view was that the trauma's severed their belief, knowledge, and any connections to a Higher Power, and faith.
  • 11. Adult survivor's can find healing. It will be uncomfortable, and maybe terrifying BUT they must 'want' to 'learn' the what, why, where, when, and who. The 5 W's and especially the How, to resolve their problems arising from trauma such as fear of intimacy, anxiety, rage, addictions, and depression. First Steps to find Peace and Healing Research by Psychologists have found that 'Spirituality' in Survivors of childhood traumas, can find 'healing and recovery', but, again, you must 'want to learn' on 'how' to begin that journey to healing, and change your Life. Ask around, check online, check the phone book, check reviews. I'm aware that one of the FIRST obstacles one is going to face, is the $$ costs. Unfortunately, it's probably the 'best' ones who come with high $$ costs. One idea to keep in mind, is that keep their name for 'future' reference. You may not make it there today but maybe at a future date. The world is full of possibilities especially as an adult. For now, today. We can check for a person or 'treatment' centre for Adult child abuse survivors, and yes, they do exist. The Government of Canada, Public Health Agency of Canada, has a directory for 'Services for Adult Survivor's of Abuse', go ahead, type that title in your internet whether mobile phone, laptop or desktop computer. Some serve both women, and men (separately) while others are specific to women, and children. Think of these first steps as, it's time to bring 'healing to your inner child', and your 'adult self' will be there to 'protect' him or her. After all, nobody but you will 'sense and recognize'' threats to you. You've become 'emotionally sensitive'. You're very 'familiar' with abuse, and have learned all the 'signs', but also how to 'copy' such behaviours and abuses too. Entering an area that requires Your 'voice' and 'life story' can be terrifying but it can also give you an unknown 'lift' of your Spirit. A heavy weight has been lifted, and will get lighter each stage of Healing that you learn. Trust You. Nobody is going to shut you down. It's not your fault but others still look at it as 'your choice'. It's all you have known. Be gentle to you. Your first step to healing will be to 'open up' to a therapist, and it sounds scary. Being open to 'trust' somebody requires 'courage of using honesty'. Remember, nobody but you can take that first step. Go ahead, set up, and keep that first appointment.
  • 12. Learn to Understand – Rights, Laws and Child Abuse Why do parents hurt their child(ren)? Adult survivor's of child abuse are 'shells' of themselves like walking Ghosts. They have not learned a whole lot about 'decent' behaviours. Always having been in 'survivor' mode. They do not fully understand the reasons for their emotional state, and have 'normalized' the violence they grew up in. For them, that's how the 'world' must be, and if so, they are 'ready' for violence. There have been Laws that have been set out to 'protect' children. Canada is a signatory to a few Conventions that protect 'Rights of the Child' along with other nations at the United Nations (UN). Provincial, Territorial, and Federal laws exist that also offer protections for Rights of the Child that enshrine the Rights of the Child of the UN. These court cases are handled in the Family Courts, and the Criminal Code can address 'family violence' which includes child abuse. A child can charge their parent(s) for abuses, as follows; Abuse and Neglect of; • feeding • clothing • housing It's ILLEGAL to 'abuse' your children. Abuse such as; • hitting your child • emotional abuse, such as, threats, criticism, humiliation • touching your child sexually • forcing your child into marriage • neglect or abandonment • exposing directly or indirectly, your child to see or hear violence Child Protection services will be allowed to 'intervene and remove' the child(ren) from the home. Police may accompany the social worker for safety. Mandatory reporting is a Law in Ontario and is accompanied with $5K Fines if NOT reported. Specific people working in these institutions, must report; Health, school, Youth workers, Daycares, counsellors, social workers, Peace officers, Coroners, and ordinary citizens. Call your local Children's Aid Society office. A very tricky situation arises in this particular scene. A parent may 'condition' a child to NOT ever 'report' to the police about family violence. Under threat of the 'unknown' if removed from home, a child may stay silent. This whole experience with Police may add further trauma to a child and it is factored in, if a child(ren) apprehension is necessary.
  • 13. Types of Family Abuse Remember! Any HARM to a child or other person, is a CRIME. Charges will be brought against you, and you may be imprisoned for a period of time. Laws from 'other' nations do NOT apply in Canada. • Prisons are RAMPANT with violence, Racism and ABUSE from both other inmates and GUARDS. Leaving with your Life is not guaranteed. Refer to reports from the 'Corrections Investigator' Annual Reports if you want 'verification'.
  • 14. Unicef | for every Child Convention on the Rights of the Child: The children's version 1. Definition of a child A child is any person under the age of 18. 2. No discrimination All children have all these rights, no matter who they are, where they live, what language they speak, what their religion is, what they think, what they look like, if they are a boy or girl, if they have a disability, if they are rich or poor, and no matter who their parents or families are or what their parents or families believe or do. No child should be treated unfairly for any reason. 3. Best interests of the child When adults make decisions, they should think about how their decisions will affect children. All adults should do what is best for children. Governments should make sure children are protected and looked after by their parents, or by other people when this is needed. Governments should make sure that people and places responsible for looking after children are doing a good job. 4. Making Rights real Governments must do all they can to make sure that every child in their countries can enjoy all the rights in this Convention. 5. Family guidance as children develop Governments should let families and communities guide their children so that, as they grow up, they learn to use their rights in the best way. The more children grow, the less guidance they will need. 6. Life survival and development Every child has the right to be alive. Governments must make sure that children survive and develop in the best possible way. 7. Name and Nationality Children must be registered when they are born and given a name which is officially recognized by the government. Children must have a nationality (belong to a country). Whenever possible, children should know their parents and be looked after by them. 8. Identity Children have the right to their own identity – an official record of who they are which includes their name, nationality and family relations. No one should take this away from them, but if this happens, governments must help children to quickly get their identity back.
  • 15. 9. Keeping families together Children should not be separated from their parents unless they are not being properly looked after – for example, if a parent hurts or does not take care of a child. Children whose parents don’t live together should stay in contact with both parents unless this might harm the child. 10. Contact with parents across countries If a child lives in a different country than their parents, governments must let the child and parents travel so that they can stay in contact and be together. 11. Protection from kidnapping Governments must stop children being taken out of the country when this is against the law – for example, being kidnapped by someone or held abroad by a parent when the other parent does not agree. 12. Respect for children's views Children have the right to give their opinions freely on issues that affect them. Adults should listen and take children seriously. 13. Sharing thoughts freely Children have the right to share freely with others what they learn, think and feel, by talking, drawing, writing or in any other way unless it harms other people. 14. Freedom of thought and religion Children can choose their own thoughts, opinions and religion, but this should not stop other people from enjoying their rights. Parents can guide children so that as they grow up, they learn to properly use this right. 15. Setting up or joining groups Children can join or set up groups or organizations, and they can meet with others, as long as this does not harm other people. 16. Protection of privacy Every child has the right to privacy. The law must protect children’s privacy, family, home, communications and reputation (or good name) from any attack. 17. Access to information Children have the right to get information from the Internet, radio, television, newspapers, books and other sources. Adults should make sure the information they are getting is not harmful. Governments should encourage the media to share information from lots of different sources, in languages that all children can understand.
  • 16. 18. Responsibility of parents Parents are the main people responsible for bringing up a child. When the child does not have any parents, another adult will have this responsibility and they are called a “guardian”. Parents and guardians should always consider what is best for that child. Governments should help them. Where a child has both parents, both of them should be responsible for bringing up the child. 19. Protection from violence Governments must protect children from violence, abuse and being neglected by anyone who looks after them. 20. Children without families Every child who cannot be looked after by their own family has the right to be looked after properly by people who respect the child’s religion, culture, language and other aspects of their life. 21. Children who are adopted When children are adopted, the most important thing is to do what is best for them. If a child cannot be properly looked after in their own country – for example by living with another family – then they might be adopted in another country. 22. Refugee children Children who move from their home country to another country as refugees (because it was not safe for them to stay there) should get help and protection and have the same rights as children born in that country. 23. Children with disabilities Every child with a disability should enjoy the best possible life in society. Governments should remove all obstacles for children with disabilities to become independent and to participate actively in the community. 24. Health, water, food, environment Children have the right to the best health care possible, clean water to drink, healthy food and a clean and safe environment to live in. All adults and children should have information about how to stay safe and healthy. 25. Review of a child's placement Every child who has been placed somewhere away from home - for their care, protection or health – should have their situation checked regularly to see if everything is going well and if this is still the best place for the child to be. 26. Social and economic help Governments should provide money or other support to help children from poor families.
  • 17. 27. Food, clothing, a Safe home Children have the right to food, clothing and a safe place to live so they can develop in the best possible way. The government should help families and children who cannot afford this. 28. Access to Education Every child has the right to an education. Primary education should be free. Secondary and higher education should be available to every child. Children should be encouraged to go to school to the highest level possible. Discipline in schools should respect children’s rights and never use violence. 29. Aims of education Children’s education should help them fully develop their personalities, talents and abilities. It should teach them to understand their own rights, and to respect other people’s rights, cultures and differences. It should help them to live peacefully and protect the environment. 30. Minority culture, language and religion Children have the right to use their own language, culture and religion - even if these are not shared by most people in the country where they live. 31. Rest, play, culture, arts Every child has the right to rest, relax, play and to take part in cultural and creative activities. 32. Protection from harmful work Children have the right to be protected from doing work that is dangerous or bad for their education, health or development. If children work, they have the right to be safe and paid fairly. 33. Protection from harmful drugs Governments must protect children from taking, making, carrying or selling harmful drugs. 34. Protection from sexual abuse The government should protect children from sexual exploitation (being taken advantage of) and sexual abuse, including by people forcing children to have sex for money, or making sexual pictures or films of them. 35. Prevention of sale and trafficking Governments must make sure that children are not kidnapped or sold, or taken to other countries or places to be exploited (taken advantage of). 36. Protection from exploitation Children have the right to be protected from all other kinds of exploitation (being taken advantage of), even if these are not specifically mentioned in this Convention.
  • 18. 37. Children in detention Children who are accused of breaking the law should not be killed, tortured, treated cruelly, put in prison forever, or put in prison with adults. Prison should always be the last choice and only for the shortest possible time. Children in prison should have legal help and be able to stay in contact with their family. 38. Protection in war Children have the right to be protected during war. No child under 15 can join the army or take part in war. 39. Recovery and reintegration Children have the right to get help if they have been hurt, neglected, treated badly or affected by war, so they can get back their health and dignity. 40. Children who break the law Children accused of breaking the law have the right to legal help and fair treatment. There should be lots of solutions to help these children become good members of their communities. Prison should only be the last choice. 41. Best law for children applies If the laws of a country protect children’s rights better than this Convention, then those laws should be used. 42. Everyone must know children's rights Governments should actively tell children and adults about this Convention so that everyone knows about children’s rights. 43 to 54. How the Convention works Articles are available that explain how governments, the United Nations – including the Committee on the Rights of the Child and UNICEF - and other organizations work to make sure all children enjoy all their rights. Read more --> here
  • 19. Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts I have a mix of friends of different ethnicity, and we get along well. We have all kinds of conversations usually teasing each other about what 'type' of partner we're going to have in our lives. Silly, yeah, shhh! You didn't hear that from me. :) I wanted to add some of these scriptures, and extra quotes which I found interesting as some refer to daily Life, and you may find them interesting too. Again, we don't have to pick a specific denomination (religious institute) that others are trying to cajole us into, it's all YOURS to make that decision. Mind you, there's nothing wrong with attending with them out of respect, or curiosity. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Gaslighting is a powerful device for subjugation because it makes good people who love Freedom think they are Evil people that need to be restrained. It is also a way for a corrupt system to maintain control of the general population because it normalizes psychopathic behaviour and suppresses moral conscience by convincing people that morality is “relative” or a “matter of perspective”, and that some abusive and destructive behaviour is “necessary” in order to achieve a better world.~ Brandon Smith, Gaslighting: How Leftist Psychopaths Demonize And Demoralize Their Opposition I think this guy hits on some great points until he 'blames' the Democrats. Remember, Right is Republican ( Canada, it's Conservatives), Left, refers to Democrats (Canada, New Democratic Party, NDP). TWO very different plans for our Society. As long as people Believe in absurdities they will continue to commit Atrocities. ~ Voltaire False words are not only Evil in themselves, but they infect the Soul with evil. ~ Plato “A corrupt judge does not carefully search for the Truth.” ~ Horace Power doesn’t corrupt people, people Corrupt power. ~ William Gaddis A politician thinks of the next Election; a statesman thinks of the next Generation. ~ James Freeman Clarke Reject every form of corruption which diverts Resources from the Poor. ~ Pope Francis
  • 20. Heroes are born out of their selfless Love that will not allow them Safety bought from the torture, death, and degradation of Others. ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon When Plunder becomes a Way of life for a group of men in a society, over the course of Time they create for themselves a Legal system that authorizes it, and a Moral code that glorifies it. ~ Frederic Bastiat The duty of Youth is to challenge Corruption. ~ Kurt Cobain When you choose to Understand those who hurt you, you take away their Power over you.~ Unknown “For to be Free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to Live in a way that Respects and enhances the freedom of Others.” ~ Nelson Mandela “Only the Good Samaritan seeks the good, the well-being, and the welfare of others as well as One's self." ~ Bishop Michael Curry "We cannot tolerate or turn a blind eye to racism and exclusion in any form and yet claim to defend the Sacredness of every Human Life." ~ Pope Francis “The Creator is all around us, each day and night, Witness to what you see, hear, and feel” ~ Indigenous Elder You don't have to Trust someone in order to Understand them, but you do have to Forgive Yourself in order to make Trust possible again ~ Unknown To understand destructive Institutions is to understand the character traits and methods of the Psychopaths that control them. ~ Brandon Smith “Pride is the master sin of the Devil, and the Devil is the father of Lies.” ~ Edwin Hubbell Chapin “Those who have Faith in a Higher Power are thereafter made Spiritually alive.” ~ Protestant “Be careful who you trust. The Devil was once an angel.” ~ Anonymous “Hope is being able to see that there is Light despite all of the darkness.” ~ Desmond Tutu People's character is their behaviour - we're all capable of good and evil.~ Bertie Carvel “True forgiveness is when you can say, ‘Thank you for that Experience.’” ~ Oprah Winfrey
  • 21. Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts II When we see the changes of day and night, the sun, the moon, and the stars in the sky, and the changing seasons upon the earth, with their ripening fruits, anyone must realize that it is the work of someone more Powerful than man.” ~ Chased-by-Bears, Santee-Yanktonai Sioux “Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you, and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things They do, because Hate in your heart will consume you too.” ~ Will Smith Reason obeys itself; and Ignorance submits to whatever is dictated to it. ~ Thomas Paine The white man says there is freedom and justice for all. We have had "freedom and justice," and that is why we have been almost exterminated. We shall not forget this." ~ 1927 Grand Council of American Indians “Jesus said that the approaching end of the age will be marked by the increase of Lawlessness--“iniquity shall abound” ~ Matthew 24:12 “The most damned of all are those who see the Evil directed on others and refuse to confront it.” ~ Sherrilyn Kenyon, Inferno But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. ~ Galatians 5:22-23 E Now after their Fall the angels could not be restored [Cf. I:64:2]. Therefore, neither can Man with unrepented Sins after death: and thus the punishment of the Damned will have no end. ~ St Thomas The Dead cannot speak Lies in the Spirit World. ~ Indigenous Elder "In a gentle way, you can shake the world" ~ Mahatma Gandhi You can't travel back in time to fix your mistakes, but you can Learn from them and ask Forgiveness for yourself for not knowing better. ~ Unknown The Seven Guiding Principles for a better Life - Wisdom, Love, Respect, Courage, Humility, Honesty, Forgiveness, and Faith is your Shield ~ Indigenous Teachings Learn from yesterday, live for today, let Hope rise with every Tomorrow. ~ Unknown
  • 22. Scriptures, Quotes, my Thoughts III 'Between the government which does evil and the people who accept it - there is a certain shameful Solidarity'. ~ Victor Hugo “When God wants to take charge of the world, he doesn't send in the tanks. He sends in the Poor and the Meek.” ~ N. T. Wright “to build a Society of abundance, sharing, Love, gentleness, peacemaking, Compassion, Mercy, Faith, and joy, marked by Equality rather than Domination” ~ Unknown They’re called ‘mortal’ or ‘deadly’ Sins because they lead to the Death of the Soul,then your Soul will be in hell for eternity.” ~ History, Becky Little “Any man exalts the human mind to the place of Deity and goes so far as to rule God out altogether, that man is on the brink of Destruction. The Bible condemns human intellect as the supreme court”.~ Bible . Org Sin is not a myth, it is not a figment of the mind; sin is a fact. ~ Unknown “Following the Values of your Higher Power, must be of your own Free Will.” ~ Christian "Show Respect to all People but grovel to none." ~ Tecumseh Those who Corrupt the Public mind are just as Evil as those who steal from the public Purse. ~ Adlai Stevenson “It's not a crime to Dream of a better Tomorrow. ~ Unknown When you Forgive, you do not change your Past but you sure do Change your Future.~ Unknown Closing Thoughts Now we are near the end of this Guide. I hope you have an idea of just what religion, and Spirituality is about, and how it can give you 'strength' to survive the 'Evils' you endured, name the evils all around us, and learn to find your own 'Values'. As I mentioned earlier, Adult survivor's are 'familiar' with abuses, and violence. Those are, in my view, broken vows of 'value the Sacredness of Human Life', and children are 'Blessings', so those parents have some Spiritual work to do of their own. Maybe from view of the Church, parents taught children, how to Sin? Got to wonder, I get curious, and talk to my 'tribe', small circle of true friends, who help me find answers, and yeah, we end up having a hours long marathon of discussions going on. :) I read an article about a woman talking with her Priest about domestic violence, I loved his response
  • 23. to her, “he broke his vows of marriage when he raised a hand to strike you. You are free to leave this marriage.” Not quite the exact words but pretty near close. Churches were moving in directions, to help with rise of domestic violence against women. Take a step back, and see it all objectively now. All the quotes have been included to give you some insight to what religion and Spirituality is about though not completely. Your choice to explore, learn, and maybe join will become part of your own Life path. You are 'free' to make choices now that you're an Adult. Not all religious Denominations are identical. There is even a “Satanic Temple' for those NOT accepted by Christian churches. Their members are usually the LGBTQ, BIPOC, and other 'marginalized' groups. They don't do 'Devil Worship' stuff as shown on TV but do ' offend' words of God said by Christian churches, and advocate for Rights. Makes me think of 'contradictions' One does have to wonder about 'Christians commitment to Sacredness of Human Life' when some members have 'refused' business services, condemn others, attack them,or not help, and others left them to die. Who says we are not supposed to meet these people in our lives? Maybe God is 'double-checking' on their Soul at this meeting? Again, got to wonder at why did I meet this person? Did I help? Did I learn something? Responses say lots about 'character' of people, and us. Secondly, we have learned some people claiming to be Christians, don't walk their talk, or live their religion. So, got wonder again, are they so far gone from God, and 'human' values, they're willing to go to hell? Do they honestly believe their Sins of 'Inhumanity' will be forgiven? Only time will tell, and it's going to be between him or her, and their God. My World as an Indigenous Woman As I mentioned earlier, I don't go to any Church. I'm Indigenous, and our 'church', is the whole world, or at least, Turtle Island (North America). We don't need walls, no offence to the Church members, sorry. Well, the atmosphere could be our walls, hmm. Indigenous peoples are victims of an 'unspoken' ongoing Genocide, by White Supremacists, racists, and an indifferent government, since First Contact, that's what 1491? Some are 'assimilated, and 'run and jump' for the government. Others of us, stand on the sides, watch, listen, lay our tobacco, share our thoughts with the Creator, and send our Prayers out. We are our own 'Preacher', we conduct ourselves as 'taught' by family, and confess directly to our Higher Power. Then we move on with our lives best we can. Mind you, we all 'know' how Indigenous families were 'forcefully separated' by
  • 24. police, government, and church, and the outcomes felt to this day. Many are in 'recovery' once it's understood how their lives were 'disrupted' by government, law, and church. Our Belief, and Faith in the Creator is simple. We send Prayers out, and talk to the Creator he's made aware of our despair or fears, and we leave the problems in his hand. We do ask for help too, for the times our People have Protests against government especially when they send in 'tactical and fully ARMED' police. Anyone else 'see' a 'massacre' of unarmed Indigenous protesters on the horizon? Sort of like, another Dudley George (RIP) of the Ipperwash stand-off, killed by a sniper for carrying a stick. I'm also aware of another young Indigenous man, killed for carrying a bag of oranges, over in Toronto. They claimed he had a gun. An investigation, cleared them. Oranges are left on the steps of this particular Police station, annually. Again, it's felt that government and courts gave these 'Murderers a Free Pass'. I don't think God will give that, to all who took part in that 'case' or similar other cases. Time will tell though. Indigenous people know, there's a time, and place, consequences will happen. This is the Power of our Faith in the Creator, and God, or Higher Power for other religions. This can be yours too. Everything you want to say, or thinking, your Higher Power will hear you. Conversations, and thoughts are between you, and Him or Her. Trust is protected, absolute, unless you're going to 'confession' as some churches 'require'. That's protected too but is it truly 'private'? Sorry, no offence to church members. Curiosity is not a crime. As you can see, I still have violence in my world. Seems always from the outside. Our Higher Power is our Choice We may not be able to stop whatever harms government is doing to the people (not just Indigenous peoples), lands, our wild animals, water, air, our food sources, and they may laugh. Nobody knows for sure about a 'God' or a 'Higher Power' but those with Faith, truly believe that He or She, does see, hear, and 'return the evils' being done to us, and our lands. They won't see it (consequences) coming. We don't think of just ourselves. Indigenous people believe the Planet itself has a 'Spirit', and is alive. We feel 'protective' of our 'Mother Earth'. Who else could create such beauty in this world, and give us air, food, and water? Even if scientists do say it's these tiny microorganisms. Ok. They're whole different field with different views. So, what is the 7th Stage of Faith, Universalized or Enlightened? I must agree reaching that stage of
  • 25. being able to go beyond Self, and looking to the whole planet, and universe. As some quotes say online, 'We have only One planet, only One Chance to get it Right'. Very true, we don't have a 'Planet B'. I often silently question the 'mental health' of our government officials. They're destroying our planet for $$$, and laugh while they 'enrich' themselves. We suffer. According to Maslow's hierarchy of needs, it would be called 'self-actualization'. That last, and topmost stage of Human growth defined as ' the realization of a person’s potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth, and peak experiences'. Some people think there's a higher stage too. What? No idea but maybe closer to 'Heaven' but 'Super Powers' would be cool too! :) I also believe that Adult survivor's of child abuse, are a lot stronger than they think, but do need to find, learn, understand, and begin 'Healing', find Self, Justice, and their 'Higher Power', 'experience' life without abuse and violence plus find Peace, self-control, balance, laughter, Love, Faith, and beauty. There's beautiful people, landscapes and starlit night skies, and more. In time, they, or you will 'learn to see and recognize' the 'types' of abusers out there and all around us. It is creepy to see them, and may 'trigger' our own 'memories', and 'survival coping' skills and fears, walk away, stay calm. It's worse to see when they're not alone, but I like to think, God, or in my world the Creator, is seeing that too, maybe keeping his eye on that particular person. Maybe we are 'Witnesses?' Again, got to wonder. Abuse, Help, Faith and Prison So, back to just what is the 7th Stage of Faith called Universalized or Enlightened faith? I think it's a stage where one goes through 'Fire' (abuse, pain, violence), survives, lives in pain, and confusion when seeing kindness, caring, gentleness. Our Spirit is crying for Love. Survivors know something is amiss, may hear about counsellors but today we can search to specifically look at Help for Adult survivors of Child Abuse. They, or You can seek out help; you will struggle to stay, to learn, listen, understand, Heal, then eventually find their, or your own 'path and place' in our society. This all sounds simple but survivor's 'know' the reality is, trusting is a struggle. What is honesty? Speak exactly what you seen, felt, heard. Exactly. It's YOUR truth, part of your 'Life' story. It's confidential. Not all counselling is forever either, only as long as you need or a set time line, they will let you know or you can just ask. It's ok. Once you've reached adulthood, you learn that nobody but you can make choices about the direction of your Life. Some are currently in prison where they are 're-victimized' by other inmates, Police, Parole officers, and the prison GUARDS. Yes, charges 'may' result but not necessarily. Reports do disappear.
  • 26. Whispers from former inmates suggest guards are 'part' of 'gangs' in the prison environment, and use threats, and abuses to 'block' complaints, and 'protect' their 'gang'. They go so far as to have 'complainers' sent to maximum security where some are murdered. Those seeking a 'higher education' are also 'targeted' by guards and other inmates. Many adult survivor's of child abuse are there too. Prison is a very 'toxic' and 'inhumane' environment, and NOT good for any forms of 'recovery' from 'long-term' effects of 'child abuse'. Remember, abuses may 'lead to Bipolar Personality disorder'? I'm guessing here but do these 'inmates', gang members, or 'victims' of DAILY' prison abuses return to society, with that disorder? Guards show symptoms of 'psychopaths and sadists' .Check online to learn more about 'bipolar personality disorder, Psychopaths and Sadists'. Dark Places, People and Inhumanity So, who created them? There's 'very, very FEW 'true consequences' for prison guards, and they know it. The 'Corrections Investigator has ZERO powers to 'Protect' inmates or lay 'charges', only to 'report' to the government, and same rules apply to the 'Ombudsman' who can only accepts complaints, report to government. So, government KNOWS about the abuses – why haven't they done anything to bring Justice to inmates? Lawyers do not help, and are quite aware of the abuses. What's stopping them arriving as a 'Pro bono' lawyer? Why don't they help especially if aware of the inhumanity against Black, Indigenous, and People of Color suffering in prison? Is it truly only for the $$ they ignore the abuses? Step back, and look, imagine. If you could Help, would you? All those who 'complain' especially, get targeted for major psychological abuses, beatings, denial of prison rights, torture, die or injured to become living 'vegetables' or scarred for life. Governments, Provincial and Federal levels, and Courts do 'Nothing'. Ask any former inmate, some may be honest whereas others, say 'it's all good' out of fear of retaliation from outside 'gang' members. It seems 'gang behaviours' reach into ranks of police too. The lives of released inmates are threatened if they say anything. Again, government does nothing. Inhumanity is very RAMPANT in prison. Do your best to get counselling, therapy, or treatment for the effects of the child abuse you suffered. He or She, will help you understand, learn to change, identify your behaviours, inter-generation trauma, learn new behaviours, learn the 'social norms of decent behaviours. Do not be surprised where that 'rage' is coming from but do learn to get 'control' of it before heading in the direction of prison. Nobody deserves the 'Evil' found behind those walls. I hope I close this guide leaving you a little more knowledgeable about Faith, and the 'importance' of learning to find your 'Spirituality or religion' along with working with a Therapist for your child abuse. There is Healing of the 'Spirit',
  • 27. and a 're-balanced' view of the world. It is there but it's going to require 'trust' and 'courage' to share your full story. Your reward will be You having 'trust in You' to live a Safe, happier life, if you give yourself that Chance. Past, Future, Forgiveness We are born into this world, and we didn't ask, or maybe we did but don't remember? I mean we do start as infants, right? Anyways, some of us had loving families while others have evil parents. One child starts out surrounded with love, security, family then it's all gone, in a day. Taken to strange places, strange people. Yes, I'm using my example. Another child experiences pain, loneliness, hunger, dark. Both children experience all manners of abuses, maybe with their family, or with strangers. Their environments are 'unpredictable' and each day comes with pain, fear, loneliness, darkness. We 'learn' what we are shown but one child 'instinctively' knows, the dark is wrong. Both children are silent but they watch, listen, learn to survive. Try so hard to be 'good'. Time moves forward, and the children are older. One child is silently 'defiant' while the other child is quiet. School, medical Dr's, and other adults try to be friendly, the children shy away. It's respected by the adults, other children are cruel and may try to 'bully' them. Both children fight back but one is more violent. Their survival skills are still useful for them. Schools keep records of such events. Time keeps moving forward, and now the children find themselves as teenagers. They've survived violent home environments, along with school bullies. Adults outside of home terrify them, and they try to 'cajole' the teenager to talk but met with silence. Anger is used to chase others away. One child is 'rescued' and sent to child protection. The other child has run away, and friends with other runaways. They learn new 'life skills' to survive yet 'sense' something is amiss. Adulthood is attained, and they discover a 'freedom' yet are haunted with the past. Confusion with why some people are kind to their children, they see children laughing, and running along, their parent hovers nearby. They each learn about 'counsellors' and ' therapy' to help them 'change' and 'feel better'. They're not sure. A therapist helps one young adult learn about child abuse. He or she makes the 'connections' about abusers and victims, and understanding grows. The other adult wants 'fast' healing, gets angry, may walk away. Healing is not an 'instant sensation'. Talking about the past is painful, it hurts, and has been hidden. One young adult stays with the therapist for that 'change' and to 'feel better'. A talk about 'forgiveness' arises. This young adult learns, it's not to forgive the Abuser, it's to learn 'self forgiveness'. To realize, that child of long ago, did not know anything, only what they 'learned' from their 'parent or parents'. Now they must 'un-learn' all that to 'fit' into society with a clean slate, and he, or she, is learning. One step at a time, and each visit with the therapist, will eventually end with 'balance, finding, knowing, decent, acceptable behaviours'. Seeking Justice is ok too.
  • 28. Living his, or her, life with these 'new' skills, brings friendships, steady and calm moods, maybe occasional panic attacks, but able to 'cope' now. We learn, nobody is perfect and it's ok. Life is getting better, life is changing. My own Survival I can truly say this since I too survived my early years, as a 'battered child' , a term used prior to 'child abuse' starting at 3 years old, in the Provincial government institution known as Children's Aid Society,CAS' and their assigned 'Foster home' and then my years as an 'adopted' child in a non-native home. I had help getting to CAS, my first round, then I voluntarily entered Catholic Children's Aid, CCAS, the second time. Both times leaving child abuses. My 'parents' demonized me as a child to CAS and CCAS reporting me as an 'ungrateful' child, and who knows what else. They did give me all the 'material' things a child could want, but at the price of child abuse? No love, or kindness. No thanks. No more. I was learning to be 'independent', a 'very normal' stage of teen years yet NOT acceptable to my adoptive parents. They wanted full 'compliance' , and I said, No. I guess their reaction was, well ' mother' was dumbstruck. I had learned not to 'internalize' her moods or words. Stay calm, walk away. Today, material things don't mean a thing in comparison to me my family, and other peoples 'Spirit' and 'well being'. They are far more 'valuable' than all the $$$ in the world. You may learn that too. I have no qualms living as a 'pauper' or 'within my means', using that polite talk. ;) I get to make my own way in this world with or without help from others. I've met racism from people in positions to help, and it's not the first time but it means nothing. I don't let their 'crap' rule or affect my life. I do let the Creator know if I do feel hurt, and do have my 'rants'. We''re not perfect but we can still do, and give our best to self, and others. It's frustrating when want for a better world isn't materializing, don't you think? As human beings, shouldn't we be 'bettering' our Society by now? If there's Alien life, I don't think they'd want to meet us, would you be proud? I meet people, make friends, and they do help, or help me search for answers. True friends are wonderful to find, and have around. They call themselves 'my' tribe. :) For now, I hope you have learned how Faith can help overcome child abuse. Did you notice my near constant questioning, and curiosity? We should always question the world around us, wonder why about what caught your interest, try to bring change, help where we can, make a better World. There is suffering and there's also beauty but Healing must first take place. Your whole view of the world will change. One question, or observation will stand out – why do I know Evil, and the Beautiful in this World at the same time ? I hope you find your 'Happy and Peaceful' Life, it does exist. You just need Faith. Take care, stay strong, stay safe (from that Virus) ~ Gin
  • 29. ~ - - - Sharing Circle - - - ~ The following comments are from various Adult Survivor's of Child Abuse, and Therapists. These are comments about finding Strength, and Hope once again after Child abuse, and to lead lives with a clear vision, and free of being haunted. Names have been changed for their privacy. A last note, there are online communities in Forums to start building your 'tribe' for support and friendship. I finish this Guide with You in mind, and hope that you will find, and set your own Path, clear and free to reach your 7th Stage of Faith called the Universalized/Enlightened one. 'an image of God can remain intact, but it's the 'bond' to God that can get severely damaged, as well as your sense of Self and place in this world ' ~ Lisa, Survivor 'I believed that God is always with me, loves me, and hears me through my Prayers' ~ Madeline, Survivor 'Religion or Spirituality have helped Survivors develop meaning, and find Courage, and insight from their experiences.' ~ Taylor, Therapist, Child Abuse 'Not everyone finds Faith overnight. Faith is rarely easy. But if you've ever done a Good thing, and felt a Glow in your heart, then that's a little message from God. You have the freedom and capacity to pursue a closer relationship with him. Seek, and ye shall find.' ~ Jonathan Franzen 'Building a sense of Belonging with a religious community, and having a Spiritual belief are Protective factors that can support Resiliency after trauma.' ~ Janet, Therapist 'Many clients endured their kid abuse alone, and as adults, they're reaching out for support in order to Heal,' ~ Unknown, Therapist “Sharing your experience of abuse is a Courageous act of Generosity that can Change the Life of someone who’s suffering Alone. It can also have a profound impact on your life by opening windows to healing”. ~ EndCan I am a blogger at AIC|An Informal Cornr. This is where I get curious, research and Share whatever I have found. Reading is an 'informal' method of 'learning'. I hope you visit, and Share what you learned! Pass the word! Hope to see you around, and feel Free leave a comment or two on my blog! :)