1. SIBEL RODRIGUEZ
Sister Copley
English 106
June 25, 2016
Orphanages, Good or Bad?
By Sibel Rodriguez
Christmas 1980 – Sugar cookies, snowflakes and presents under the tree were in my
dreams when I heard the word Weinachten, meaning Christmas in German, for the first time.
That was the year I entered into the orphanage at the edge of the town and was told that for the
foreseeable future the orphanage would be my home. It turned out to be for the next five years.
An orphan has to be really lucky in the modern world to make it to successful adulthood.
In my childhood I have seen, heard and experienced the physical abuse that stemmed from the
family home. Being sent to an orphanage opened doors that would have been closed to me.
Some claim that orphanages result in bad behavior. My experience proves that this does not
have to be true. Orphanages are not the cause of bad behavior or a bad life.
Three topics that I will cover in this essay are abuse, statistics on orphans and the effects
of having lived in an orphanage.
Abuse comes in different forms. My personal experience with the orphanage led me to
look into the statistics of abuse. What I found was shocking. Statistics for children living in the
family home show that 13.9% for emotional neglect, 10.2% for emotional abuse, 12.0% for
physical abuse, 48.4% for physical neglect, and 6.2% for sexual abuse. Many of the problems
that people claim are found in orphanages are also frequently found in the family home.

2. In my case it was physical and emotional abuse. Beaten with anything, everything on a
daily basis was no picnic. My mother’s source of anger was unknown to me until years later
when out of the blue I called to remind her of my birthday. Her reply was that I almost did not
have a birthday because she was planning to abort me. Unfortunately for her, she was not able to,
because she was first required to notify the father. While searching for him, she got too far along
to have an abortion. Happy Birthday to me! This is the type of abuse that I endured in my
home. My experience in the orphanage was much different.
The day I was sent to the orphanage was the first of many choices that shaped who I am
today. Bruised and barely having the vision to see what was in front of me, I was sent to the
nurse’s office. The nurse, who was being sympathetic to my plight, informed me that the
Germany Polizei (Police) would be coming shortly to document every single bruise on my body.
They stopped at 54. Bite and pinch marks, metal pipe gashes across the back, legs and arms were
among the injuries they could see, or that were visible. After the horror of the inspection was
complete, I was then told that I would be going to the Kinderheim (orphanage) on the outskirts of
the town in which I lived. To say that I was terrified was an understatement. I was nearly
paralyzed with the fear of what my mother would do, but the nurse stated that my mother would
not be able to see me, so there was nothing to fear. The first of many good choices was listening
to the nurse. Heading to the orphanage that I did not even know existed made me realize that
there would be other kids like me – Orphans. Continuing with my research according to data
released in 2003, as many as eight million boys and girls around the world live in institutional
care. Some studies have found that violence in residential institutions is six times higher than
violence in foster care.

3. Some other disturbing statistics state that; Every day 5,760 more children become
orphans; Approximately 250,000 children are adopted annually, but…Each year 14, 505, 000
children grow up as orphans and age out of the system by age sixteen; Each day 38,493 orphans
age out; Every 2.2 seconds another orphan ages out with no family to belong to and no place to
call home. Studies have shown that 10% – 15% of these children commit suicide before they
reach age eighteen. These studies also show that 60% of the girls become prostitutes and 70% of
the boys become hardened criminals
Another study reported that of the 15,000 orphans aging out of state-run institutions every
year, 10% committed suicide, 5,000 were unemployed, 6,000 were homeless and 3,000 were in
prison within three years…An estimated 1.2 million children are trafficked every year; (THE
STATE OF THE WORLD’S CHILDREN 2005)
No matter what, we, sadly, or tragically cannot dispute the facts listed above, but there is
always an exception to the rule and lucky for me, I was that exception. For me the orphanage, or
so-called institutional care, was Heaven on Earth. For the first time in my life, food, clothing, a
bed, and everything in the room was mine. I was the youngest of approximately 150 orphans in
this big house with boys in one wing, and girls in the other. Everything I ever needed, wanted,
or requested waited only for me to utter the words, and suddenly it would be there. A wonderful
director of the orphanage took me under her care. Anyone looking for me only just needed to
look for her, where they would find me as well. I was introduced to traditions that I had never
heard of: We went on summer vacation to Amsterdam in Holland three summers in a row. For
winter vacation we went to the lodge to learn skiing and many other fun things. To say while I
was there I missed my mother would be a lie. Not even once, did she cross my mind. Among
the many experience I had in the orphanage beating was not one of them.

4. Some suggest that living in an orphanage causes significantly lower IQs and levels of
brain activity. They are more likely to have social and behavioral abnormalities such as
disturbances and delays in social and emotional development, exhibit aggressive behavior,
have problems with inattention and hyperactivity; they may also develop syndromes that
mimic autism. Although there is some indication that this may be true in some cases, it was
not in my case.
NONE of these effects even remotely applied to me back then, and definitely not
now. Quite the opposite, I participated in fun activities daily. Received a great education; I
was blessed to have had two languages already and could communicate perfectly. I learned
how to be with others; I learned that I was loved. And most importantly I learned, that
when I did something wrong I would not have to live in fear of a beating. I made the choice
to be happy in circumstances that were not created by my own doing, but that of a mother.
However, after five years of bliss and euphoria turned into visitations after two
years with supervision. For the first time, I threw a temper tantrum of not wanting to see
my mother. A year later it became a visitation without supervision, another year after that,
an overnight, and that was followed by the whole weekend. Then going home for good
came up and my euphoria and bliss were shattered when the idea of going back to the
abuse became a reality. After coming home the beatings resumed. I made the choice to
remember all the good things I had learned that had shaped me. And then when at the age
of 17, sporting more bruises, bloody and beaten again resulted me leaving with a broken
leg and two broken fingers. My choices were clear to me that these setbacks would not
have any negative impact in my life. They would not cause me to become one of those
negative statistics.

5. In conclusion, bad behavior or life circumstances should not be blamed on
orphanages or institutional care. Abuse is not limited to orphanages. I was one of the few
orphans that was really lucky in the modern world to make it to successful adulthood by
making choices that had positive effects regardless of all the setbacks. I had the most
wonderful experience in an orphanage simply because a school nurse helped me to make
the right choice which led to memories for two lifetimes starting with Christmas in 1980.
(Weinachten im 1980).