1. I have come to realize I'm not like most people. My birth mother had given me away at
birth. As for my father, that's an answer to a question I'll never know. All I can say is it hurts
knowing the only 2 human beings in the entire world who created you, and should love you
inexplicably an irrefutably just didn't.
A Caucasian family adopted me at a very young age. As an innocent young African
American girl I, I didn't quite understand why I didn't look like the ones I call Mom and Dad. I
always knew in the back of my head I didn't belong, never did the question fade from the back
of my mind. Who am I?
It's hard seeing the people you grow up with; your friends, family etc. knowing that
they're related and they know where they come from; where their history lies, and that they
never have to wonder which parent or relative they look like most; where they get their traits or
their talents from, how and why they are the way they are. For me, those questions will never be
answered.
So I, with all of these unanswered questions about who I am, escaped from all of it as
often as I could, by diving into my sketchbook anytime I felt alone or incomplete,or just needing
to get away, and I'd draw. I wanted to put something beautiful back into to the world so that I
could remind myself things weren't so bad.
I'd paint myself a whole new world so that I could escape into at any given moment. A
world full of color happiness and pure serenity. Where time stops I know longer would think
about all of the bad things that happen in life, but instead, focus on how lucky I am to have my
family, and how lucky I am to be alive.
These days whether is a stroke of a brush, or a scribble on a piece of old notebook
paper, I'm instantly whisked away. There has not been another time spent doing anything else in
the world where I have felt complete and at peace with myself.
The thought of living my life without being able to express myself through art wouldn't be
living at all. With the power to allow others to truly see the world through your eyes, or escape
the world whenever I feel incomplete, and create something beautiful truly makes the world a
more beautiful place.
To this very day, I still wonder who I am, but that's the thing I've learned about life. We're
all trying to discover ourselves. I have 82 more years to figure out who I truly am.
It doesn't matter where you come from, who you look like or how your story began, we're
all figuring it out. We're going to get hurt, people are going to disappoint you. All I can do is try
and learn from it all and focus on my goal, which is putting those puzzle pieces together. I truly
believe you will allow me to discover, create, and reinvent myself. Thank you for your time and
consideration.