1. Enthymeme:
Question: ​What are the consequences of feminism/ gender inequality on men?
Claim: ​Gender inequality and feminism in our society hurts men.
Because:​ Gender inequality harms men just as much as women, men should become feminist.
Implicit Assumption:​ By men standing up for gender equality and feminism, both women and men will be
happier, and more satisfied with where they stand in society.
Contract Question: ​Why should the male population stand and become feminist?
Man up the Feminist Way
Feminism. A word that can make a strong, masculine man cringe in front of a room of women.
Three syllables that can stop all conversation within a room of dozens in just one second. A topic, which
since the early 1900’s has been hated, attacked, tainted, spit at, kicked, and ignored due to the
uncomfortable feelings our society of both men and women has towards it. This word, Feminism, which
Emma Watson have also stated to be known as “Man Hating”, “Extremism,” or even as “Sexism”, is a word
that is very well misunderstood throughout most of the people in this modern time of the globe. ​(Watson)​ But
is it just the word we hate? Or do we hate the idea itself? Or is it really, we just don’t understand what the
issue of feminism really is? The actual, and modern definition of Feminism according to the Urban Dictionary
is “The advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality.” So, by this
definition, shouldn’t we all stand up and be feminist? What if we changed the definition to “Advocacy of
women’s and ​men’s​ rights”?​ ​Don’t we all want equal rights? Personally I know that without any hesitation, I
can stand up and say boldly, and proudly, that “Yes, I’m a Feminist. I’m for equal rights for women, and for
MEN. I’m for equal rights of ALL people.” That’s right. Feminism isn’t just an issue for women, and girls. It’s
also a fight for equality within the male population. If we just forget about the word ‘feminism’, and look at the
underlying meaning of the word, and what it’s fighting for we might actually start liking the word itself. It isn’t
hating on the sexes, but rather ­ helping of the sexes. Gender inequality is a real issue in our society, and
feminism isn’t only a problem for the women ­ but is also a burden for the men. The male population in our
society is without doubt being burdened by what their gender truly means. This argument isn’t just another
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2. boring, traditional argument for the rights of women. No, this argument and paper is for a fight that needs to
be made to the entire world, and especially to the men who don’t see it yet. A fight that shows both men and
women that FEMINISM is something we all have to be actively involved in. It’s a call for all to stand, to fully
fulfill the statement that our Founding Fathers made a long time ago, that “All Men are Created Equal” ­ no
matter our heritage, intelligence, race, or ​gender​ differences. ​(Founding Fathers "Declaration of
Independence")
Let’s start this argument with defining what gender means in the society today. From the moment a
baby is born, the social norms and views of our society are thrust upon the little child. The tiny, innocent, and
helpless babies don’t have a choice or a say in the matter of whether they’re going to be treated as a male
or female. Their genes have already decided that for them. If it’s a girl, it would be natural to assume that
their outfit would be a pretty, flowery, pink dress ­ implicating to all that she is an absolute female. If it’s a
boy, it will be equally as natural to assume that he will have a cute little cap, khakis, and plaid shirt as his
parents carry him out the door ­ an outfit, if you really think about it, a girl could and often do wear. Why
can’t they both go home in just a t­shirt and pants? Why is it always so extravagant, and so different in two
very definite ways? Why does there have to be a behavioral difference between the two genders? In another
example, Tony Porter ­ and educator and advocate for feminist right ­ gave a TED talk, describing a time
when his 11 years old little girl came running up to him with tears streaming down her face. “It didn’t matter
what she was crying about”, he said “she could get on my knees, she could snot my sleeve up, just cry, cry it
out. Daddy’s got you. That’s all that’s important.” Now when compared to his 12 year old son who would go
to him with tears streaming down his face, he would reply with frustration, “Just go in your room...sit down,
get yourself together and come back and talk to me when you can talk to me like a MAN.” ​(Porter)​ The
differences there are just undeniable. So maybe that’s where the problem of expectations in behaviors and
social norms of gender equality actually starts. From their youngest age, children are taught they have to be
a certain way to adapt to society views. Girls have to comply with ​feminine​ stereotypes, and men have to
conform to ​masculin​e stereotypes.​ ​So maybe then, when it really comes down to it, feminism and
masculinity actually have more in common than being near polar opposites. Maybe instead of having two
completely different definition to these words, they could come together and form a new definition ­ a
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3. definition of gender equality where you can act the way you want without having to conform to the way
society thinks you should be.
If we see femininity as something that hold girls back from succeeding just as much as men, lets
say in becoming a CEO of a large, national company; then shouldn't we also see masculinity as something
that holds men back from being just as good as women in homemaking and nurturing of children? Just as
girls have to be quite, graceful, and well ­ lady like, boys are told they have to be strong, tough, and well ­
men like. To drive this point closer to home, Tony Porter’s talk on “A Call to Men” can maybe give us a
closer insight as to why there are gender differences in societal expectations between girls and boys, and
women and men. As a boy who grew up in the New York City Bronx, Porter was taught that “men had to be
tough, had to be strong, had to be courageous, dominating ­­ no pain, no emotions, with the exception of
anger ­­ and definitely NO fear…” He goes on to describe this as what we now know as the “Man Box” ­ in
what he describes to have “all the ingredients of how we define what it means to be a man.” ​(Porter)​ So, to
be a real man, all males have to fit into that man box. They are in fact ­ if there’s no better phrase for it ­
trapped in that man box ­ with a heavy padlock on it too. A man box that tells them they have to be strong at
all times. A box they are given from the beginning of their lives telling them they can’t cry, or openly express
their emotions ­ other than anger. A box the society gives to all men as a gift, as if commanding them to
never act ‘like a women’, or be ‘like a gay man’. Sadly, a box that gives men the immense pressure of being
the ‘protector’, ‘provider’, and ‘leader’ of the household. Now, I stand here as the author and writer of this
argument, and most importantly I stand as a woman. But even as a woman, I can only imagine the horrible
and yet widely accepted burden our culture and society has given to our men. Let’s contrast this heavy
burden to what is expected out of the women of today. Girls are taught to be timid, to be soft, to be shy, to
behave ‘lady­like, and in Disney’s terms ­ to become just like beautiful princesses. Little girls think that they
need to sit in their princesses’ dress all day and wait for their prince charming. ​(Hanes)​ Women are told that
our most important responsibility is to have beautiful children, and be wonderful mothers, which with sincere
honesty, is not an easy job. Throughout history, women were expected to stay home with their children,
while our husbands leave to provide for the family. Our job is to follow the lead of our husbands, and in the
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4. words of Chimamnda Ngozi Adichie ­ an author and advocate for women’s rights ­ “to do everything that
would please our husbands.”​ (Adichie)
Why is there such an immense difference between what’s expected of women versus what is
expected of men? Why as women are we expected to stay at home, raise our children, and do all we can to
‘please’ our husbands? Why are girls taught from an early age to be timid, and soft, and to always be a
lady? Are we saying that raising children in the home is only a ‘ladies’ job? Aren’t we biased to think that
men can’t stay at home and be good housekeepers? Is it the negative implications of the society that men
will not do well at home being a caregiver? If we keep traveling down that thought then, establishing as a
society that men can’t be good fathers at home, what happens when a man feels like they aren’t being as
good of a ‘protector’, ‘provider’, or ‘leader’ either? Where does men turn then? They’re told by the society,
and the ‘man box’ of masculinity that they can’t be sad, they can’t cry, they can’t show weakness, and most
certainly they can’t go and tell their peers about it, much less their wives. So what then? Sadly, as much as
we don’t like to accept it, the world has an idea of what happens at that ‘what then’ point. Just as all humans
do, men feel emotions even when they feel ashamed to express it. Many turn to depression, anxiety, and
hate for themselves. As shown in the graph below done by the BC Medical Journal, we see that men,
especially during their middle age years have the highest rates of suicides. Tragically, during times of
depression and feelings of failure, or lack of masculinity, a large population of men turn to suicide as an
option. In an article contributed by Alice Walton, a large contributor to psychology and neuroscience
research, she said that “​men currently in their
mid­years are the ‘buffer’ generation – caught
between the traditional silent, strong, austere
masculinity of their fathers and the more
progressive, open and individualistic generation of
their sons. ​They do not know which of these
ways of life and masculine cultures to follow​.”
(Walton) ​She goes on to explain why men have
such a high suicide rate ­ high enough to be
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5. described as a ‘silent epidemic’ by the BC Medical Journal. ​(Bilsker 529­34)​ “​Middle age”, Walton continues,
“is also the time when the importance of long­term life decisions is clear. Feeling ​boxed​ in could seriously
compromise well­being ­ leading to depression and anxiety.” Statistics shows that men are 10 times more
likely to commit suicide if they live in a low socioeconomic state ­ relating to their ability to provide and care
for their families, and explaining their feelings of depression when they lose their job, and feelings of failure
when his family is not financially stable. ​Most of us don’t see this happening within our male friends, or it
could even be within our fathers ­ and when we see it, no one really speaks up. In British Columbia, suicide
is one of the top three causes of death in men between the ages of 15 and 44. In 2005, 45 males died of
AIDS in Canada in contrast to the 2,857 males who died from committing suicide. Across the United States,
and other countries, men show a suicide rate of 3.0­7.5 times higher than women.​ (Bilsker)​ I don’t know
about you, but I see this as an immense problem. This has to STOP. But saying ‘stop’ isn’t going to get us
anywhere. We can’t just expect these horrific rates of suicides to suddenly drop. Depression, anxiety, and
feelings of hate and failure doesn’t just go away when we leave it alone, or because we say it should. In all
cases of depression, it has to be ​treated ​before it goes away. ​(Cochran) ​Until we do something that will
change our way of thinking, change the way that MEN feel, and act, we won’t be able to change the
problem. Just as Walton said, ”This isn’t only a personal problem, but it should also be a local and national
goal to prevent male suicide rates due to gender inequality ­It’s up to NOW.” ​(Walton)​ We need to do
something now. So, maybe the problem with gender inequality is that it’s prescribes to how we should be
rather than recognizing how we really are as an individual. Not as a boy, or girl. Not as a man, or women.
And not part of a male, or female population. But as an individual, personalized to what we feel, to what we
think, to what we want to do, and to what we ourselves really love to be.
Now, I know that there’s counterarguments out there that will react to my argument with points such
as “Well, man and woman aren’t equal! The biological system between male and female will never be the
same. And that makes us different!” Another argument of some is whether or not gender equality is really all
that important compared to the world’s economic progress, or other more pressing political issues ­ basically
arguing that modern feminism is not an issue to be focused on. It’s another topic to be pushed aside, to be
ignored ­ and to those arguments I can say that yes, to a certain point, yes I agree. Yes, I agree that males
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6. and females will never be the same. Females have the ability to have children, and men will never have that
chance. Females are usually shorter, and males are usually taller. Males are usually stronger physically
compared to females ­ they can lift more. We could keep going on to list the biological differences of the
human body between genders ­ but that list isn’t as long as we think it is. Yes, biologically we’re different.
But, taken into account our small speck of biological difference, does that mean that males and females
can’t have equality because of that? Does that mean it’s okay for males to have such a slim chance to get
custody rights in a divorce? ​(Saunders)​ Is it right then, because of our differences, men can’t stay at home
and be a perfectly good, and wonderful father? Does that mean that ALL men have to be a successful
provider to be a man? Is it fair then, that men can’t have emotions either? And if you don’t think these are all
important issues to focus on, then please explain to me how your conscience can get away with being
completely fine that over 2,800 men just in Canada per year committing suicides because of gender
inequality. This number isn’t for the world, it’s just for one province of one country. Imagine the deaths over
the entire globe due to this problem. No, this might not be about fighting world wars, or solving the issues of
world poverty. No, this issue isn’t about the next presidential election, or even about global warming. No, this
won’t fix the problem of the economy, but the fight for gender equality can, and WILL save lives. If we fix this
problem of gender inequality, letting men know that they aren’t failures if they lose their jobs, or that it’s okay
if they feel they’re not providing enough for their families, then maybe they won’t feel as trapped in that
stupid man box. Maybe then they won’t feel as pressure. And then maybe, just like the BC Medical Journal
and I hope, we’ll see the rates of suicide decrease amount our male population. ​(Bilsker)
This is my argument. An argument that feminism is also a man’s issue. It’s a call to all of us to
stand, and do something for us ­ individually. If a man wants to stay home and raise his children, he should
be able to because he can be equally as good. If a boy wants to cry, let him cry. If a girl wants to play with
swords and lego, let her have fun! If a man is struggling, let him know it’s okay to struggle. We all struggle. If
a man doesn’t want to be aggressive, don’t force him to be. If a woman doesn’t want to be ladylike and wear
a dress, than let her be! Let us have the chance of gender equality within our views of how society should
be. Let us stand and fight against the behaviors we have all been taught since our youth. Let us both, as
male and females, help each other stand up and break out of the ‘man box’ of gender inequality. Let us not
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7. only fight for the equality of women, because this isn’t just a women’s problem, but it’s also men’s ­ because
all men have been hurt by this gender inequality system. ​(Kreitler)​ Let men be the men they want to be! Let
us as a society unlock this heavy, and destructive padlock on this man box, and let the men free! We ALL
deserve to be free, and equal ­ just as our Founding Fathers wanted us to be. We all should stand, and
become FEMINISTS together.
Citations
Adichie, Chimamanda. "About Chimamanda | Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie." ​Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
About Chimamanda Comments​. 1 Jan. 2007. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Adichie, Chimamanda. "TED | We Should All Be Feminists ­ Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie at TEDxEuston
(transcript)." Vialogue. 29 Apr. 2013. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Bilsker, Dan, and Jennifer White. "The Silent Epidemic of Male Suicide." BC Medical Journal 53.10 (2011):
529­34. Print.
Chemaly, Soraya. "International Women's Day: 10 Reasons Why Feminism Is Good For Boys and Men."
The Huffington Post​. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 6 Mar. 2012. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Cochran, Sam V., and Frederic E. Rabinowitz. "Gender­sensitive Recommendations for Assessment and
Fathers, Founding. "Declaration of Independence." ​Constitution of United States​. 4 July 1776. Web. 24 Oct.
2014.
Hanes, Stephanie. "Little Girls or Little Women? The Disney Princess Effect." ​The Christian Science
Monitor​. The Christian Science Monitor, 24 Sept. 2011. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Katz, Jackson. "Violence against Women ­ It's a Men's Issue." TED. TED, 1 May 2013. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Kreitler, Katy. "Why Men Need Feminism Too (Really, You Do!)." ​Everyday Feminism​. Everyday Feminism,
20 Aug. 2012. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Meredith, Ashley. "Search Digital Collections." Gender Differences in Parenting Styles and Effects on the
Parent­Child Relationship. Honors Committee of Texas State University, 1 May 2009. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Peters, Lucia. "Bustle." ​Bustle​. 10 Oct. 2014. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Porter, Tony. "Transcript of "A Call to Men"" ​Tony Porter: A Call to Men​. TED, 1 Dec. 2010. Web. 24 Oct.
2014.
Saunders, Randi. "5 Ways the Patriarchy Hurts Men Too." Theradicalidea. 16 Apr. 2012. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Scott, Harper. "Brain Scans Prove There Is No Difference between Male and Female Brains." ​J.P.E. Harper
­ Scott​. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
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8. Treatment of Depression in Men." ​APA PsycNET​. American Psychological Association, 1 Apr. 2003. Web.
24 Oct. 2014.
Walton, Alice. "The Gender Inequality Of Suicide: Why Are Men At Such High Risk?" ​Forbes​. Forbes
Magazine, 24 Sept. 2012. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
Watson, Emma. "Emma Watson: Gender Equality Is Your Issue Too." ​HeadQuarters​. UN Women, 20 Sept.
2014. Web. 24 Oct. 2014.
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