Your Self-Worth Impacts Your Net Worth

Your Net Worth is
Tied to Your Self-Worth
BONI CANDELARIO
@bonicandelario
www.bonicandelario.com

Today’s Agenda
 Explore your money story and your relationship with
money.
 The Myth of Scarcity (Not Having Enough)
 Wealth is an Inside Job
 YOU Are Enough
 Tap Into Your Inner Wisdom
@bonicandelario www.bonicandelario.com

Ground Rules

My Story

My Inspiration & Motivation

Do these ring true for you?
 Get out of debt
 Clarify my vision for myself
 Make more money without losing myself
 Find out what’s stopping me
 Take myself more seriously
 In my business I want to see black instead of red
 Start saving for retirement
 Quit my job
 Overcome my fear
 Earn really big money

The Doctor

Writing Exercise
Answer these questions:
 What would you be doing more of?
 Where would you choose to live?
 What would you change about your life?
 What would you add?
 What would you eliminate?
 Any regrets?
 What haven’t you gotten to do that you wanted to do?

Partner Up!
 Share what you’ve learned with one other person
and be supportive.
 Remember the Ground Rules.

The Voices in Your Head
 The voices in your head are not all yours
 They are the voices of a parent, grandparent,
teacher, the culture, friends, something “out there”
but it isn’t yours.
 Quote: “If you hear a voice within you say ‘you
cannot paint,’ by all means paint, and that voice
will be silenced.” -Vincent van Gogh
 Where would we be if Vincent had listened to the
voice in his head? Where are you now because
you listen to yours?

Exercise – Early Money Story
 My biggest fear about money is ____________?
 My father felt money was ____________?
 My mother felt money was _____________?
 In my family, money caused _______________?
 My earliest experience with money was
______________?
 I’m afraid if I had more money, I would ___________?
 If I could afford it, I would ____________?
 People with money are ____________________?

Find Your True Voice
 There is another voice much quieter than all the
others, a much more authentic voice. Call it your
soul, your higher self, your inner wisdom. It’s the
voice that has hope, that wants to become more of
who you are, live the life you were meant to live
and make a difference in this world. It’s the voice
that knows that there is better out there even
though they can’t see it and others tell you to give
up the dream.

Underearning:
Earning Less than your Worth
Number your paper 1-14, answer yes or no if you feel this way.
1. I often give away my services (volunteering, or working more
hours than I’m actually paid).
2. It’s so hard to ask for a raise (or to raise fees) that I just don’t
do it.
3. I actually dislike money and/or the people who have it.
4. I am proud of my ability to make do with little. It’s admirable.
5. I blame someone or something else for my financial situation
(IRS, ex-husband, boss).
6. I find ways to avoid dealing with money
7. I tend to sabotage myself at work (apply for jobs I’m
overqualified for or low-paying, stop short of reaching goals,
change jobs a lot.)

Cont.
8. I work very, very hard (long hours, several jobs).
9. I fill my free time with endless chores and tasks.
10. I am in debt, with little savings, and no idea where
my money is going.
11. I have a family history of debt and underearning.
12. I continually put others’ needs before my own.
13. I am frequently in pain or stress around money.
14. Recognition and praise are more important to me
than money.

Writing Exercise:
Discover Your Earnings Ceiling
 Imagine you are earning $5,000 a year. How do you
feel? What are your thoughts?
 Imagine you are earning $10,000 a year. How do
you feel? What are your thoughts?

 Imagine you are earning $1,000,000 a year. How do
 What did you discover? Were there any surprises?
How high was your ceiling? What does this tell you?

The 3 Myths of Scarcity
1. There’s Not Enough
2. More is better
3. That’s Just the Way It is A.K.A.
1. It’s a dog eat dog world
2. The Rat Race
3. Survival of the Fittest
4. It’s either You or Me

Be Comfortable with Being
Uncomfortable
 The ability to tolerate discomfort is absolutely
essential to go to the next level in any area of your
life.
 Anxiety, fear, worry, nervousness, resistance…all
these are normal reactions to new situations.
 It does not mean something’s wrong. It just means
that something is different.

12 Signs Your in Resistance
1. YOU’RE TOO BUSY. (“I have no time.”)
2. YOU PROCRASTINATE. (“I’ll do it later.”)
3. YOU’RE SCARED INTO INACTION. (“Omygawd, what
if…?”)
4. YOU DEFER DECISIONS. (“You do it; you decide.”)
5. YOU LOSE INTEREST. (“This is boring, it’s not my
thing.”)
6. YOU’RE FORGETFUL. (“Oh, I meant to, but I forgot.”)

Resistance Cont.
7. YOU’RE DISORGANIZED. (“Where did I put that…?”)
8. YOU FOG UP, SPACE OUT. (“What are you talking
about?”)
9. YOU FEEL PARALYZED. (“I just can’t think or get
going.”)
10. YOU FIND REASONS NOT TO ACT.
11. YOU’RE IMPATIENT. (“This is taking way too long.”)
12. YOU KEEP RUNNING INTO NAYSAYERS. (Other people
say, “You can’t do that,” “That’s not possible.” This
form of resistance is especially sneaky. You project
your own fear out onto others.)

YOU Are Enough

Wealth is an Inside Job
 The word wealthy has it’s roots in well-being and is
meant to describe a rich and satisfying life and not
just large amounts of money.
 What we appreciate and nurture grows

Wealth Demonstration

 Head count – Name all of the people who have
offered unconditional love and appreciation for
you. Who believed in you?
 Name the qualities that they have mentioned they
appreciate about you.
 These quality of character are assets in addition to
your skills and abilities.
 These are more valuable and unlimited than any
possessions you might own or any money you have
in the bank.
 These are qualities that money can’t buy.

Wealthy Thoughts
 I am determined to get paid what I’m worth.
 I am passionate about my work.
 I have very supportive nurturing relationships (parents, spouse,
friends, family.)
 I like wealthy people.
 I have little or no credit card debt.
 I intentionally get myself in situations beyond my ability and then
rise to them.
 I am resilient and able to bounce back when I fail.
 I am filled with gratitude for the success I’ve achieved.
 I work very hard, but I know I don’t have to do everything myself.
I know how to delegate and set limits.
 I am tenacious in achieving my goals.

Sources:
The Soul of Money
by Lynne Twist
Overcoming
Underearning
by Barbara Stanny

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