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The Brain
  Seriously Funny
     Brain quotes are something people
    don't mind! And funny quotes about
                  brains are something
          to think about...
"See, the problem is
that God gives men a
brain and a penis,
and only enough
blood to run one at
a time."
           Robin Williams
"God gave women intuition
and femininity. Used
properly, the combination
easily jumbles the brain of
any man I've ever met."

         Farrah Fawcett
"The way I see it...
If you need both of
your hands for
whatever it is
you're doing, then
your brain should
probably be in on it
too."   Ellen DeGeneres,
          on cell phones and driving
A man's brain has a
more difficult time
shifting from
thinking to feeling
than a women's brain
does.
         Barbara De Angelis
If little else, the
brain is an
educational toy.
           Tom Robbins
"I have a brain and
a uterus, and I use
both."
     Patricia Schroeder
Researches at Yale
found a connection
between brain cancer
and work environment.
The Number 1 most
dangerous job for
developing brain
cancer? Plutonium
hat model.

         Jimmy Fallon
"I've got the brain of
a four year old. I'll
bet he was glad to be
rid of it."
            Groucho Marx
"I used to think that
the brain was the most
wonderful organ in
my body. Then I
realized who was
telling me this."
          Emo Phillips
I'm no bimbo. I'm
opinionated and I do
have a brain....
      Christina Aguilera
"I am a Bear of Very
Little Brain, and
long words bother
me."
       Winnie the Pooh
I don't want my body
to be a distraction
from my talent or
my brain.
        Shania Twain
"Brain: An apparatus
with which we think
we think." Ambrose Bierce,
           The Devil's Dictionary
Is it Nice in your
snowstorm- freezing
your brain? Do you
think that your
face looks the same?

           David Bowie
In the scales of the
destinies, brawn
will never weigh so
much as brain
          James Russell Lowell
Any man who reads
too much and uses
his own brain too
little falls into
lazy habits of
thinking
           Albert Einstein
Sometimes I think if I had the
same body and the same natural
ability and someone else's brain,
who knows how good a player I
might have been.
                     Mickey Mantle
"Aristotle was famous for
knowing everything. He
taught that the brain
exists merely to cool the
blood and is not
involved in the process
of thinking. This is true
only of certain persons."
                     Will Cuppy
Success is not something
I've wrapped my brain
around. If people go to
those movies, then yes,
that's true, big-time
success. If not, it's much
ado about nothing.

              Matt Damon
"How is education supposed to make
me feel smarter? Besides, every time
I learn something new, it pushes
some old stuff out of my brain.
Remember when I took that home
winemaking course, and I forgot
how to drive?"

                 Homer Simpson
I don't think there's
anything unique about
human intelligence.
All the neurons in the
brain that make up
perceptions and
emotions operate in a
binary fashion.
             Bill Gates
Estimated amount of
glucose used by an
adult human brain
each day, expressed
in M&Ms: 250
            Harper's Index

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The brain

  • 1. The Brain Seriously Funny Brain quotes are something people don't mind! And funny quotes about brains are something to think about...
  • 2. "See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time." Robin Williams
  • 3. "God gave women intuition and femininity. Used properly, the combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I've ever met." Farrah Fawcett
  • 4. "The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too." Ellen DeGeneres, on cell phones and driving
  • 5. A man's brain has a more difficult time shifting from thinking to feeling than a women's brain does. Barbara De Angelis
  • 6. If little else, the brain is an educational toy. Tom Robbins
  • 7. "I have a brain and a uterus, and I use both." Patricia Schroeder
  • 8. Researches at Yale found a connection between brain cancer and work environment. The Number 1 most dangerous job for developing brain cancer? Plutonium hat model. Jimmy Fallon
  • 9. "I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it." Groucho Marx
  • 10. "I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this." Emo Phillips
  • 11. I'm no bimbo. I'm opinionated and I do have a brain.... Christina Aguilera
  • 12. "I am a Bear of Very Little Brain, and long words bother me." Winnie the Pooh
  • 13. I don't want my body to be a distraction from my talent or my brain. Shania Twain
  • 14. "Brain: An apparatus with which we think we think." Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary
  • 15. Is it Nice in your snowstorm- freezing your brain? Do you think that your face looks the same? David Bowie
  • 16. In the scales of the destinies, brawn will never weigh so much as brain James Russell Lowell
  • 17. Any man who reads too much and uses his own brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking Albert Einstein
  • 18. Sometimes I think if I had the same body and the same natural ability and someone else's brain, who knows how good a player I might have been. Mickey Mantle
  • 19. "Aristotle was famous for knowing everything. He taught that the brain exists merely to cool the blood and is not involved in the process of thinking. This is true only of certain persons." Will Cuppy
  • 20. Success is not something I've wrapped my brain around. If people go to those movies, then yes, that's true, big-time success. If not, it's much ado about nothing. Matt Damon
  • 21. "How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?" Homer Simpson
  • 22. I don't think there's anything unique about human intelligence. All the neurons in the brain that make up perceptions and emotions operate in a binary fashion. Bill Gates
  • 23. Estimated amount of glucose used by an adult human brain each day, expressed in M&Ms: 250 Harper's Index