From an early job as a runner on Stanley Kubrick's The Shining, through to becoming one of the most recognisable faces in entertainment today, here's how Simon Cowell's CV might look if he was looking for a new job.

1. Please note, this is a fictional CV designed to be used as a template. All facts, figures and quotes are unverified and any
relation to real-life events is purely coincidental.
Simon Cowell simon.cowell@meanjudge.com | Beverly Hills | 07755 555 555
Objective
I don't mean to be rude, but I'm the best looking and most honest candidate you'll ever have. I may not
have the talent, but I can spot it in others and I have a history of letting everyone I encounter exactly what
I think of them.
I'm about as ambitious as they come and world domination isn't too far away. A knighthood is looking
likely, so long as I don't insult Her Majesty's singing. I'm not motivated by money, mainly because I
already have plenty, and I'm looking for a role where I can use my influence to show others how much
better I am than everyone else.
Key Skills
• Financial Management - With meticulous budgeting and investment I've amassed a personal
fortune of over £100m and have successfully founded and grown many businesses.
• Communication - Whether on TV, radio or in print, I'm able to cut through unnecessary babble
and get straight to the point, providing and entertaining and thought-provoking point of view.
• Analysis - I have vast experience of skills analysis, priding myself on the ability to pick out the
great from the good and nurturing talent towards fame and profit.
Career History
Founder - Syco (part of Sony BMG Music Entertainment) (2002)
A London based entertainment company divided into three sections: Syco Music, Syco TV and Syco Film
• Accounted for 40% of all Sony Music UK profit in 2006 abd 70% in 2008
• Launched Il Divo, an internationally successful operatic pop group and a child spi-off version,
Angelis
• Appeared as a judge on The X Factor, with Sharon Osbourne, Louis Walsh, Cheryl Cole and
Dannii Minogue
• Signed Leona Lewis who became an international star with #1 single and album sales around the
world
• Launched the Got Talent franchise with the first show, America's Got Talent drawing 12m viewers
a week
• Scored global publicity with act Susan Boyle becoming a media sensation
• Produced American Inventor, Celebrity Duets, Grease Is the Word and Rock Rivals
A&R Consultant - BMG (1989)
• Created sub-division, S-Records
• Signed hit making acts including Curiosity Killed the Cat, Sonia Evans, Five, Robson & Jerome
and Westlife
• Released several novelty recordings featuring Teletubbies, Zig and Zag and the Mighty Morphin
Power Rangers
• Appeared as a judge on 2001 TV series Pop Idol, signing the top two finishers Will Young and
Gareth Gates, both of whom went on to have #1 UK hit singles. Subsequently became a judge on
US version, American Idol.
www.cvjunkie.com

2. Please note, this is a fictional CV designed to be used as a template. All facts, figures and quotes are unverified and any
relation to real-life events is purely coincidental.
Founder - Fanfare Records (1985 to 1989)
• Released a string of from artist, Sinitta
• "So Macho" reached #2 in the UK charts selling 900k copies and turning an investment of £5k
into £1m
Founder - E&S Music (1983)
• Achieved five simultaneous singles in the UK Top 40
A&R Assistant - EMI (1980)
• Started in the mail room and was promoted through the ranks to A&R Assistant and then Music
Publisher.
Runner - Elstree Studios (1979)
• Worked on Stanley Kubrick's The Shining, cleaning the infamous axe used by Jack Nicholson.
Other Activities
• Supporting The Association Of Children's Hospices
• Supporting animal rights, appearing in a video for PETA
• Aided production of the charity single Everybody Hurts in aid of victims of the 2010 Haiti
earthquake
• Published my autobiography "I don't mean to be rude, but..." in 2003, the 7,078th bestselling book
on Amazon.co.uk
• Placed #33 on Channel 4's list of the all-time 100 Worst Britons
• Voted the 10th most terrifying celebrity on television in a Radio Times poll consisting of 3,000
people
• Appeared as a guest voice on The Simpsons, Family Guy, and Shrek 2
• The fastest "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car" on BBC's Top Gear, achieving a lap time of 1:45.9
in a Suzuki Liana
• Chosen as the first 'victim' of the re-launched This Is Your Life in 2007
• Appeared as a speaker at the Concert For Diana, held at Wembley Stadium in 2007
• Partner in the Royal Ascot Racing Club, a syndicate which owned the 2005 Epsom Derby winner,
Motivator
Education
Dover College - Kent
• Left before 6th Form. I never liked being told what to do.
References
• Available on request; just don’t ask for one from Louis Walsh
www.cvjunkie.com