The best tweets from @BDGarp as a PowerPoint presentation by @FlyoverJoel to benefit the @sucittaM & Danielle Parise Medical Fund

1. Who Are You
Again? The Best
Tweets of
@BDGarp
A PowerPoint presentation by
@FlyoverJoel to benefit the @sucittaM
& Danielle Parise Medical Fund

5. Trend of Divorce Rates to Being Eaten by a Bear Over Time
12
10
8
6
Divorce
Bear Attacks
4
2
0
1760
1780
1800
1820
1840
1860
1880
1900
1920
1940
1960
1980
2000
2013

6. Modern Love
• Look, I’m not going to lie to you.
Wait, that’s not true; that’s a lie, already.
Sorry, everything’s a lie I guess. You look
pretty though.
• I’m just a boy standing in front of a
girl, asking her to move so I can see the
television.
• I want you to feel like you can tell me
anything but not actually do that.
• I asked a pretty girl in a bar where she had
been for nearly all my life. She said “Not
born.”

11. It’s time we start ignoring other
people.
Never give up, unless you’re tired, or
lazy or just really bad at stuff.
First rule of thumb: Thumbs
shouldn’t have rules. That just makes
no fucking sense.
I just saw a woman fall in the street
so I asked if she wanted help or sex
because I don’t know her or her
hierarchy of needs.
Wisdom for the Ages

13. Did you ever have sex so good
you had to wake up from your
dream and tell your cats?

16. In Conclusion
• No one can take away your dignity if you don’t
have any.
• Sometimes you just have to grab the bull by the
balls before you realize “This can’t be right.”
• Some idiot just told an elevator joke ON an
elevator. It was wrong on so many levels.
• I just spent two hours holding the door open
for an old guy at Denny’s.

17. The presentation was created as part of an auction to raise money for the
@sucittaM & Danielle Parise Medical Care Fund.
For more information, and to donate, please visit this link:
Follow @BDGarp on Twitter, and/or check out the rest of his Top Tweets!
You can also follow FlyoverJoel on Twitter or Facebook.
“Remember the last time you dropped everything to help someone?
They do.” – Brian Christopher Drury (BDGarp) 8/26/2012