This document provides an overview of a parenting seminar given by Dr. Gemma Russell. She discusses parenting as being like an architect who designs boundaries and rules with compassion. The "big R of parenting" refers to relationships which build resilience in children and improve outcomes. Effective parenting involves establishing clear rules and boundaries like castle walls in order to increase safety and define limits of behavior. When issues arise, parents should clearly define the problem and goal, understand the child's perspective, and create a plan to change behaviors step-by-step. Upcoming seminars will address topics like communication, problem-solving, coping with challenges, and changes in family structures.

1. PARENTING
BY DESIGN
Seminar One – March 2014
Dr Gemma Russell
Clinical Psychologist

2. Overview
• Architect, builder and compassionate ruler
• The big R of parenting
• Castles have walls
• Ikea kitset for parenting

3. Architect, Builder and
Ruler
• Focused and goal orientated
• Compassionate and non-negotiable
• Will not succumb to pleading, negotiation or
threats

4. The Big R of Parenting
• Your biggest asset
• Your child’s biggest protective factor
• Enhances resilience against adversity
• Improves pro-social decision making
• Improves health and mental health outcomes
• Improves school engagement and success
• Enhances self-esteem and confidence
What is it?

5. Castles Have Walls
• Purpose of a wall is to define the boundaries and
increase security and safety. The size and shape of the
wall is determined by the specific purpose.
This is the purpose of parenting rules that you make.
• Young people are like rubber balls, bouncing as far and
wide as the boundaries allow
• Changing rules means that young people don’t know the
bounds of the safety net (this is you)

6. IKEA Kitset for Family
Problems
1. Clearly define the problem
2. What is the behaviour saying? (frame in a
positive manner from child’s perspective)
3. What is the payoff? (something they get or
avoid)
4. Clearly define the goal
5. Identify the steps and strategies to behaviour
change

7. Upcoming Seminars
For 2014
• Communication and assertiveness
• Problem-solving strategies
• Parking over the lifespan
• Promoting positive coping strategies
• Dealing with common challenges (facebook, school
bullying etc.)
• Unexpected family changes, such as step-parenting,
blended families, grief, separation and divorce

8. Contact Details
Dr Gemma Russell
Clinical Psychologist
Director of Clever Minds Psychology
Telephone – 03 9397 6016
Direct Cellphone – 0435854205
Email – gemma@clevermindspsychology.com.au