Pocket Jesus provides humorous and lighthearted sayings on various topics including caffeine, sin, praise of God, markets, rebuilding structures, harvests, and drinking wine. The sayings reference biblical passages or events but update them with a modern and casual tone. Pocket Jesus aims to offer amusing commentary rather than serious theological statements.

1. Pocket Jesus
Pocket Jesus Says….
Says….

2. ”Come to me, all
“”
you who are
sleepy and
groggy, and I will
caffeinate you."
Pocket Jesus

3. What? Who says
"
I don't have a
sense of humor?"
Pocket Jesus

4. "Let the one who
has never sinned
throw the first
post!"
Pocket Jesus
(John 8:7)

5. "From the rising of the sun to the place
where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be
praised." Psalm 113:3

6. "This is NOT
my body."
Pocket Jesus

7. "How dare you
turn this
market into my
Father's
house!?"
Pocket Jesus

8. Pocket Jesus says,
"Tear down this sandcastle, & I'll
rebuild it in 3 days!"

9. Pocket Jesus
says,
"The Kingdom
of God is like a
hot cup of Ca
Phe Sua Da."

10. May you never
beat fruit
again!....becaus
e of drought
conditions in
Texas; not
parabolically."
Matthew 21:18-22

11. “It’s all good!”
Pocket Jesus

12. “The
harvest is
plentiful,
but the
drinkers are
few”
Pocket Jesus

13. “””knock and the
door will be opened
to you....unless Oa
and Huong aren't
here yet.“
Pocket Jesus waits to
enter Ca Phe Phin

14. "Wine gladdens the heart and calms
your nerves from the whining child in
the booth to your left."
Pocket Jesus