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1. Funny Doormats
Many people like to express themselves through their front doormats. It is the
first point of contact for the visitor and mats used to simply say, welcome.
Nowadays, there is all manner of funny doormats that greet people. Some demand
that the reader has their sense of humor intact. There are subtle, brash,
insulting and clever captions available on the mats.
Mats for pet owners are very popular, especially in homes where dogs or cats
rule the roost. Sentiments such as Cat is God, The Cat and Its Housekeeping
Staff Reside Here and Don't Make Me Come Out There (signed by the dog) show who
is in charge. Some funny doormats have the simple message, Wipe Your Paws.
Another dog authored one begins a long plea with the words, My Captors Continue
to Torment Me etc.
Alcohol is another favorite theme, the house owners declaring an exaggerated,
hopefully, need for beer or wine. Hence the question, got beer? That's before
anyone has got past the door. Another mat declares We Serve Only the Finest
Californian Wines, Did You Bring Any?
Hobbies are another subject, mostly involving playing golf or going fishing. A
golf widow or widower will buy A Golfer and a Normal Person Live Here or Working
Is For People Who Don't Golf. Card sharps can put out a mat with a picture of
playing cards on poker night to say Game Underway-Do Not Disturb. Funny doormats
keep up with the times and there is one for the latest craze for sudoku. A
picture of a sudoko grid carries the caption, While You Wait. Parents also can
identify with certain messages on mats. One simply says Mom's Fast Food. Another
says Ring Bell, Win A Kid.
For people who are fed up with door to door salespeople and the like, there is
We Love Our Vacuum, We've Found God and We Gave at the Office-Now Please Go
Away. Funny doormats are not always polite, as in All Welcome Except You, Did
You Remember to Wipe, Go Away and stop Thief. Law enforcement is given short
thrift with Come Back With a Warrant. Burglars are shown a helping hand with Key
Hidden Here, accompanied by an arrow pointing to behind the mat. The simplest,
yet cleverest caption has to be Hi, I'm Mat. Perhaps one day, someone will open
up a museum of funny doormats. This will be amusing and also give a snapshot of
out times for future generations.