1. A Cinematic Dissection: 500 DAYS OF SUMMER.
It says it’s not a love story, but love hasn’t been more realistic and appropriate for our
times than here.
As we know, an important part of American culture is the pursuit of “the one”. What
many don’t realize is that their pursuit can be downright flawed, even corrupted, by their past
experiences, childhood upbringing, and positive or negative mindset. All of us want love, many
of us want our soul mates as fast as possible, and plenty of us will be desperate, obsessive, or
naïve. Growing up with fairy tales, the constant reminder of the happiness brought on by other
people’s discovery of their “soul mates” and our own instincts that drive us to procreate have all
influenced us to get on the path toward that fairy tale ending.
Then life kicks in, and reality affects our envisioned fairy tale. It feels annoying. It feels
tragic. It feels confusing. But, we lived in reality all along, and our expectations have a hard time
fitting in. We want what we’ve wanted since the beginning, but life requires us to work toward
that goal, and the work seems harder than we imagined since we grow up believing that fate will
bring you and your soul mate together for that happily ever after. We all know by our college
years that reality isn’t a fairy tale, but the moment we’re old enough to see reality and the
expectations we grew up with clash, in other words, the day we realize life isn’t a fairy tale but
what you make it out to be, the moment is a bit depressing. We grew up safely in a world where
things will come together inevitably (thanks Disney) but then learn that we were lied to, in a
sense. That we have to work, suffer, endure some unbearable moments in our pursuit for
happiness and love before we obtain said bliss.
The experience is educational, aiding our necessary journey to self-improve and become
one with this reality that seems difficult to fit in. We improve over a lifetime, but have been
“taught” that once marriage happens, there’s not much else past that. Realistically, you have, on
average, 40 or 50 more years to go, so there’s plenty of time to self-improve and live life.
I might as well be Tom Hansen writing this, protagonist of 500 DAYS OF SUMMER, a
forgotten romantic comedy that delivers the most honest, realistic portrayal of love in years. He
learns this big lesson at the end of the film after a 500 day “relationship” with Summer (play by
Zooey Deschanel). 500 DOS is a refreshing, non-linear, warm and slightly-heartbreaking tale of
a naïve mid-twenties greeting card writer and aspiring architect who crushes on his boss’s new
assistant Summer almost immediately. Winner of the 2009 Satellite and Independent Spirit
Awards for Best Original Screenplays, and nominated for numerous others, 500 DAYS centers
on Tom’s lust for Summer, a man who grew up believing he would not be happy until he met
“the one” thanks to depressing British Pop music and the ending of the classic movie THE
GRADUATE. Summer, however, had to live with her parent’s messy divorce and developed a

2. pessimistic mindset about relationships ever since, leading to a slim chance for Tom to commit
as much as he wants to.
The film explores our common naivety during our pursuit for our soul mates, people we
want to discover too soon. As you will see with Tom, a lot of us will do anything to keep the
chance with a potential soul mate alive, from defending them more than they should be to our
well-meaning friends to going along with a casual relationship offer even when we want the real
deal and the boyfriend-girlfriend labels, just because we don’t want to be alone and we want to
keep any chance alive. Not all of us, but a lot of us. This film, even though it follows two
experienced lovers, accurately-portrays the exploits of a lot of first-time daters, especially
teenagers. While I don’t mean peer pressures, losing virginity, or any angst we dealt with during
those difficult times, I do mean giving into our lust a little bit more than our honest judgment
because of our fear of being alone and the ill-fated desire for someone who is incompatible with
us to be perfect enough to keep forever. In the end, though, we know the truth, but the truth hurts
and it’s hard to accept it.
We have all been there. Naivety is not stupidity or corruption within our souls. In my
opinion, it is when our desires overpower our judgment a little too much that our mindset works
with desire over judgment. It is perfectly fine to have the desires we grow up wanting: financial
success, children, and love. But thanks to many influential factors in human life inside a dense
civilization, the power of our desires and their impact on our minds can fluctuate, often leading
to naivety, pessimism, cynicism, or even depression.
That’s what Tom Hansen endures. Played by the then-not-so-popular Joseph Gordon-
Levitt, Tom is seen pursuing Summer one minute and nostalgic for her the next. The film starts
during their last days together and then to their first days together, and the two plotlines continue
forward and backward until they meet and finalize. Thrown in are charming visual touches such
as fictional interviews, an infrequent deep-voiced narration, some hand-drawn animation and a
comedic dance sequence. Overall, these touches add a visual representation of the feelings Tom
endures at critical moments of the film. Unlike glossy, fairy-tale-inspired romantic comedies
whose endings are seen a mile away and are driven usually at the point of view of a woman, 500
DAYS focuses on a failing relationship that may never last and what it takes from us to realize
the truth, and to learn that we’re mighty fine on our own instead of only feeling worthy when
we’re attached.
There are no clichés in the film, and it was inspired by the writers’ similar experiences
with love, so there’s no need to worry about finding a tired message. Tom and Summer are two
normal people in real life, but given qualities a boy and girl on the big screen are never usually
given. Tom wants to commit and is usually naïve, quickly feeling like it’s the end of the world if
he breaks up with a girl, and is working a job he doesn’t love because his dreams of being an
architect fell through, since it proved more challenging than he thought. Summer is broken -
romantically – thanks to her parent’s divorce, and is distant and independent. It seems like a role

3. reversal of the typical male and female protagonists of a traditional American romantic comedy.
This film proves that there are lots of men who want commitment as much as women do, thanks
to a few supporting characters who share in that conquest, instead of having only Tom want the
bliss while the other males around him want the life of a bachelor, as seen in many traditional
films.
Many other little lessons and tips are thrown at us that we can take home for our entire
lives. Tom’s lust for commitment has him believe Summer is more awesome than she really is
because they share some specific interests, something many of us take too seriously. His little
sister, developed intellectually more than she should be, serves as his mini-therapist, quickly
proving that a few common interests don’t contribute to compatibility as much as he wants it to.
Tom changes his stance on boyfriend-girlfriend labels when his casual relationship with Summer
proves fun, but eventually he’s forced to confront the underlying issue that she doesn’t want
anything serious while he does. Confronting anything serious must happen as soon as possible,
and, like in this film, can be disastrous if done too late. Tom already knows the relationship may
not go where he wants, but believes after some time together, her feelings for him may increase
to the point she changes her mind. After all, it happens all the time, and we cannot blame him
because she does have feelings for him, but is unable to commit partly because her parents’
divorce tragically-altered her mindset about everlasting love. With all the simple spontaneous
fun they had – shower sex, IKEA-exploring, music shops – you’d say the chance for love is
pretty possible.
Speaking of spontaneous fun, the film delivers a more realistic portrayal of dating in
general with what they actually do together. No fancy restaurant dates, romantic walks in the
park or pier, or anything else that may be impersonal, superficial, or just overdone in films. Tom
and Summer are simply together and enjoy each other no matter where they are. In a real
relationship, two people should aim for the joy of simply being with each other because love
comes from connection, not your surroundings or your actions in impressing your date. They
hang out at music shops to check out their favorite vinyl records, movies, at IKEA lounging
around the bedroom and kitchen sections being Tom and Summer, not man and woman. It’s
worth pointing out because it’s refreshing, realistic, and fights the norm that dates should be
glamour and about wooing the other when it’s really about the joy of time together no matter
what you do. At one point, Tom asked “So, what do you wanna do now?” and it wasn’t
portrayed as a bad thing that the guy didn’t have a plan. For years, I, and probably many other
guys, worry about planning dates so much to avoid that question, which we fear makes us look
unattractive and unreliable. From childhood to adulthood, men are compelled to be in charge and
know how to be a leader as women are compelled to learn multitasking a.k.a. balancing
childcare, household chores and career. But the truth is, as I found out from real experiences and
those of friends and family, it’s not about what you do. It’s about who is there to do anything,
whether you planned out your day or not. Besides, spontaneity is important sometimes, and fun
and helpful in a relationship. Since films are uniquely-educational, 500 DAYS OF SUMMER

4. earns points for displaying a more realistic and enjoyable relationship in a genre full of
superficial lessons and thinly-portrayed relationships.
There is one tired message here, actually, but it’s done in a refreshing manner: follow
your dreams. Tom almost gave up his dream to be an architect because of his difficulty with
finding a job. But the truth is he has trouble finding the guts to pursue that challenge more than
he is because he grew up believing love is the key to happiness, and is therefore lacking some
self-confidence and ambition necessary to meet his other goals. A lot of us have that problem in
some degree. Hey, we grow up with many kinds of influences and they do affect how we turn out
in adulthood. Our responsibility is to see that, determine how they affected us, and learn about
ourselves. Then can we self-improve after discovering the sources of what limits us, or blocks
our path, to success. For Tom, it was a childhood of British Pop music and the ending of THE
GRADUATE, a film that saw a shy college graduate being seduced by a middle-aged woman
wanting some casual fun, leading to events that result in him stopping his young potential soul
mate’s wedding, only to have no relationship build out of that. True love seems pretty hard to
find if you saw that as a kid.
But the most important lesson learnt here is one where the final scene between Summer
and Tom gets the most credit. Many relationships consist of lovers who are clearly not meant to
be together. In other words, they are too incompatible to work out. Add the lifestyle of dating
only with physical attraction or few common interests to hold a relationship together, and you
have a recipe for many incompatible relationships. However, human beings are a determined
species, and many of us give into determination and obsession, especially into naivety. You can’t
deny that you’ve heard at least one story a year about how two people who shouldn’t be together
keep it going out of some mystery reason, a fear of being alone, or just plain naivety. I hear a
dozen every year, and one involved a beautiful 23 year old woman who gave into her lust for a
baby and decided to get pregnant by her old boyfriend who she recently reunited with.
Unfortunately, the boyfriend was known to be a jerk and a cheater, and constantly acted like an
idiot. The guy involved a second woman to be a roommate with them, and it was too obvious she
was the woman he was cheating on her with. He actually used a fake name on the kid’s birth
certificate! She was too naïve to see his lack of reliability and the consequences of becoming
pregnant too early. As if it wasn’t bad enough, her friends supported her 100% of the way with
almost no thought. If the girl said she wanted to see if cutting herself would be so bad, they’d
advise her to do it. That bad. Point is, the ending of 500 DAYS is an honest example of one
thing:
If you’re incompatible, it won’t last, and shouldn’t.
Summer and Tom want different things. Even if they share some interests and enjoy
being around each other so much, it doesn’t guarantee everlasting love. Summer isn’t a
relationship kind of girl. She doesn’t believe in love because her parents’ divorce showed her it
can’t last. Tom is more optimistic about love, even if he is a little desperate and plenty naïve. He

5. still wants commitment, the bliss of being a husband and enjoying that special someone’s
presence. They tried convincing each other that they were wrong, but it never worked. They truly
believe in what they believe in because that is who they are. They are just incompatible, and
realize it together. It takes strength to accept that because desire is powerful. This time, judgment
overpowers desire and one loses their naivety. Though loss is devastating to us, it’s a step closer
to the real bliss we seek, because now we have the key ingredient in making that cake:
Good judgment.
And with that, we’ll be able to detect compatibility with someone and incompatibly with
someone, and be able to deter any more failing relationships or repeated mistakes. We have more
self-confidence, knowledge, wisdom, and a better sense of what we want. It’s not about fate, it’s
about acting on it, but with your heart and your mind functioning better than ever. Together.
I was naively in love more than once. I dated someone but later broke it off. I fell in love
after she found a new boyfriend, someone she was also naively in love with. I learned almost a
year and a half of misery later that we were incompatible because I focused too much on the few
good things about her when there many differences between us that rendered us incompatible.
One of them was her being a little more of a party girl than she claimed. I didn’t want to let go of
my love because of my chance to love someone and stop being alone. Why did I care so much
that I was alone? Why do we all feel that? For me, it’s because – I thought at least - I always felt
alone, growing up distant from my parents and cooped up at home, wanting some joy that
everyone else seemed to have. It made my emotions more intense and my desire for someone too
incredible. Like Tom, it takes strength and courage to be strong on your own when you have a
past that affects your life in a negative way. A lot of us may learn the hard way, but it’s our job
to learn it to start with and take what we can so we can achieve our goal. The end result? A new
hope for Tom and a fun new girlfriend for me. We all win in the end!
UPDATE: I broke up with her too. See above for why.
And I learned even more. In fact, I now relate to Tom more than ever YEARS AFTER writing
this piece. So now you know I know this stuff TOO well.
In short, 500 DAYS OF SUMMER is a refreshing, honest, and realistic romantic comedy
that contains movie magic from its smarts, comedy, unique style and loveable characters that
relate to us far more than many traditional films out there today. It’s so warm and charming that
it can cheer you up in record time when you’re down, and the ending will definitely paste a smile
on your face.
DVD SCORE: 4/5