Trelawny A. Grasp has recently purchased Lakjaw Manor and hopes to gain status and an appointment to the local bench. However, his plans are disrupted by the arrival of two rival pirates, Calico Jack and Violent Vincent, who have come to confront Trelawny for stealing funds as Treasurer of the Brethren O' the Coast pirate organization. A confrontation ensues in which Trelawny is locked in the well and the local Lord Lieutenant is put in the stocks. Soon after, the pirates' revelry is interrupted by the arrival of local militia led by young Jim Hawkins, resulting in five pirates being shot and Calico Jack and Vincent being placed in the stocks.

1. Lakjaw Manor 2012Lakjaw Manor 2012
The original ‘Bayko Baron’ pirate adventureThe original ‘Bayko Baron’ pirate adventure

2.  A beautiful Queen Anne edifice recently taken over by Trelawny A. Grasp – back from theA beautiful Queen Anne edifice recently taken over by Trelawny A. Grasp – back from the
Sugar Islands with a fortune to spend.Sugar Islands with a fortune to spend.

3.  With the house comes status – there’s most o’ local gentry standing thereWith the house comes status – there’s most o’ local gentry standing there
and that’s the Lord Lieutenant of the County’s coach coming up the drive.and that’s the Lord Lieutenant of the County’s coach coming up the drive.

4.  A rush of silk coats and doffed feathers – yon’ Trelawny’s so confident he’ll be appointedA rush of silk coats and doffed feathers – yon’ Trelawny’s so confident he’ll be appointed
to the local bench he’s even had his own stocks installed in readinessto the local bench he’s even had his own stocks installed in readiness

5.  But who’s this threatening to spoil the party? ‘Tis W.I. – Nay, the beards are too short! ‘TisBut who’s this threatening to spoil the party? ‘Tis W.I. – Nay, the beards are too short! ‘Tis
Huguenots again? Nay, no whiff o’ garlick. Tis Calico Jack Chinless the infamous buccaneer.Huguenots again? Nay, no whiff o’ garlick. Tis Calico Jack Chinless the infamous buccaneer.

6.  And look who be at his side, his rival, Violent Vincent Arbuthnot! What heinous piece of deviltryAnd look who be at his side, his rival, Violent Vincent Arbuthnot! What heinous piece of deviltry
can have brought these two rascals together?can have brought these two rascals together?

7.  Shortly the gentry and staff are being put to harsh language !Shortly the gentry and staff are being put to harsh language !

8.  It seems that Trelawny was recently appointed Treasurer to the Brethren O’ the Coast –It seems that Trelawny was recently appointed Treasurer to the Brethren O’ the Coast –
whereat he made off with the boodle. So they sent Blind Phew (an odour problem) and Mediumwhereat he made off with the boodle. So they sent Blind Phew (an odour problem) and Medium
Nick L. Plating (the differently legged chappy) to hand him Black Spot ( a rather smelly labradorNick L. Plating (the differently legged chappy) to hand him Black Spot ( a rather smelly labrador
I believe) and have come to discuss it in person.I believe) and have come to discuss it in person.

9.  But Harkee! Dissension raises its ugly head as Calico Jack wants to blow Trelawny from theBut Harkee! Dissension raises its ugly head as Calico Jack wants to blow Trelawny from the
carronade (some kind of fruit drink made out of carrons, I expect) while Vinny wants to pelt himcarronade (some kind of fruit drink made out of carrons, I expect) while Vinny wants to pelt him
wi’ soft cushions. In the end they compromise, Grasp goes down the well and the Lordwi’ soft cushions. In the end they compromise, Grasp goes down the well and the Lord
Lieutenant in the stocks.Lieutenant in the stocks.

10.  Now the staff are set to gathering pelf and piling it on the drive – all the riches o’ theNow the staff are set to gathering pelf and piling it on the drive – all the riches o’ the
Spanish Main, dubloons, trinket o’ price and fancy kickshaws from a Hidalgo’sSpanish Main, dubloons, trinket o’ price and fancy kickshaws from a Hidalgo’s
hacienda in Hispaniola – damn, now I’ve got to put my teeth back in!hacienda in Hispaniola – damn, now I’ve got to put my teeth back in!

11.  Oh dear, ‘tis cutlasses on the front lawn - all because Betty, the buxom butteryOh dear, ‘tis cutlasses on the front lawn - all because Betty, the buxom buttery
babe, and Pretty Pru, the pantry princess, have decided to join in their ownbabe, and Pretty Pru, the pantry princess, have decided to join in their own
ravishment – thus annoying two of the female pirates who have started layingravishment – thus annoying two of the female pirates who have started laying
about them in a fit of jealous pique – one or two points being very sharplyabout them in a fit of jealous pique – one or two points being very sharply
made indeed!made indeed!

12.  And now, Lookee! The game really is up. For didn’t young JimAnd now, Lookee! The game really is up. For didn’t young Jim
Hawkins (Argh Jamlid!) slip off all slippery like while ye were eyeingHawkins (Argh Jamlid!) slip off all slippery like while ye were eyeing
yon Betty and now here he is wi’ local militia in tow – and five goodyon Betty and now here he is wi’ local militia in tow – and five good
rascals down in the first volley! All very discouraging!rascals down in the first volley! All very discouraging!

13.  Now ‘tis Calico Jack and Vinny in stocks – wi’ Lord LieutenantNow ‘tis Calico Jack and Vinny in stocks – wi’ Lord Lieutenant
regaling ‘em on their fate. Meantime the militia have taken the treasureregaling ‘em on their fate. Meantime the militia have taken the treasure
off for safe keeping – no, really – and in all that hurrahing and roaringoff for safe keeping – no, really – and in all that hurrahing and roaring
there’s no chance o’ hearing the whimper from the well! Oh well!there’s no chance o’ hearing the whimper from the well! Oh well!