my green pantts

1. 2009Humanities 30-1Cassy Johnston[MY Green Pants]Article about the war between internal and external demands and the pressure of being “cool.” <br />Do you remember back to grade six? When you thought you were cool and your soul purpose was just to be accepted. Do you remember having your favorite outfit or article of clothing that you thought was just so amazing? Well I do. It wasn’t your average Billabong Hoddle or Hurly t shirt but instead a pair or neon green, spandex Capri’s and they were incredible. Or so I thought. You see I bought them because I thought no one else would have them and they would be admired by all. Unfortunately they were not at all accepted by the rest of the student population. Paired with a bright pink, beaded flower in-crested top, I arrived at school feeling good. I was surrounded by a sea of classmates, chatting about their weekends and gossiping about things that couldn’t really be defined as gossip. In awe over my beautifully crafted outfit they all fell silent as I gracefully glided past them. Stopping at my locker, I flick my hair effortlessly to the side while flashing a <br />toothless smile. Okay, maybe it wasn’t exactly like that but you get the picture. Sadly my moment of fabricated confidence shattered when Jennifer, whose true name has been changed for security reasons, ripped it away and threw it across those sixth grade hallways. Although she wasn’t your typical “popular” girl, she still impacted me that day when in front of half of the grade six population, announced that my clothes were tacky and clashed and advised I not wear them. I mean I know it’s not a life shattering moment that will haunt my dreams forever, but I was in grade six and it hit me like a speeding car. I never wore my green pants again, and instead began to dress for my peers and not myself. I had given in and taken the easy way out, allowed the external demands of what people wanted to outweigh my internal demands, what I wanted. Just like Tim o’ Brien from On The Rainy River, I had let the pressure of being judged become too strong and forgotten about what truly made me happy. Whether it be wearing what you want or to <br />avoid fighting in a war you don’t believe in, I know now that one’s personal well being can only be fulfilled when their internal demands are completely met.<br />Now I wear what I want and I could really care less about the opinions of others. I mean if it makes you happy there should be no questions about it, you should do it. Although I never got to wear my green pants again I learned from my experience and no longer do things others want me to do. I do what I want to do. <br />