1. Leħen Familji Nsara April 2014 ● Ħarġa Nru 19
Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar
żuru l-webpage tal-Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar Għafas hawn biex tmur fil-paġna ● e-mail: familjiflimkien@gmail.com
Merħba!
Merħba għall-ħarġa oħra tan-newsletter
qasira tagħna. Il-Kummissjoni Familja
Naxxar ser tkompli bil-laqgħat ta'
formazzjoni għall-miżżewġin.
Nistednukom għal-laqgħa dwar "Marital
difficulties related to substance abuse
and other addictions" immexxija minn
Jesmond Friggieri, nhar is-Sibt 26 ta’ April
2014 fis-7:30pm fl-Annex tal-Knisja
Parrokkjali fin-Naxxar.
Tagħlimiet minn koppja divorzjata
Nixtiequ naqsmu magħkom tlett riflessjonijiet ta’ koppja li ilhom divorzjati xi għoxrin sena.
Konna egoisti wisq
L-egoiżmu jfarrak żwieġ. Fiż-żwieġ, egoiżmu ma jfissirx li ma tikkunsidrawx lil xulxin; ifisser li tqis
lilek innifsek l-ewwel, l-aktar u ‘l fuq mir-raġel jew mill-mara tiegħek. Wara li tissodisfa il-
bżonnijiet emozzjonali, soċjali, spiritwali, sesswali u fiżiċi tiegħek taħseb dwar xi ħtiġijiet li jista’
jkollu żewġek jew il-mara tiegħek.
Inti ma tkunx egoist meta taħseb fil-parti l-oħra qabel il-bżonnijiet tiegħek. Dan ma jfissirx li
titraskura lilek innifsek, għaliex imbagħad lanqas ma tkun ta’ għajnuna għar-raġel jew il-
mara tiegħek. Żwieġ tajjeb hu meta t-tnejn taġixxu b'dan il-mod. Iżda jekk wieħed biss jibda
jaħseb aktar fil-parti l-oħra, dan jista’ jkun il-pass meħtieġ biex noħorġu miċ-ċirku vizzjuż tal-
egoiżmu.
Aħna ma investejniex f’xulxin
Din il-koppja kellhom ĦAFNA impenji! It-tnejn jaħdmu full-time, u r-raġel part-time ukoll.
Kienu jindirizzaw problemi finanzjarji billi jaħdmu wara l-ħin. Kellhom żewġt itfal li
jibagħtuhom privat u bosta attivitajiet wara l-iskola biex jagħtuhom edukazzjoni sħiħa! Rari
kienu jieħdu vaganza u wisq inqas flimkien.
Dan ma kienx nuqqas ta’ wieħed mill-koppja, t-tnejn ammettew li ma ddedikawx ħin u
m’għamlux sforz biex isaħħu mħabbithom. Intom qed tinvestu l-ħin, l-enerġija, u l-flus fiż-
żwieġ tiegħek? Jekk le qed, tilgħab man-nar. Veru l-ħajja mgħaġġla, dejjem għaddejjin ...
nieqfu naħsbu ... tridu ‘l quddiem tirriflettu u tgħidu "Aħna ma investejniex f’xulxin"?
Iż-żwieġ tagħna ma ħadimx
Konflitti, nuqqas ta’ komunikazzjoni, xi aħbar ħażina u diversi pressjonijiet oħra jseħħu f’kull
żwieġ. Iżda dawk li jafdaw fi Kristu għandhom sostenn ta’ grazzja, imħabba u paċenzja
meħtieġa biex jkunu jifilħu u jegħlbu kwalunkwe toqol ta’ ħajja miżżewġa.
‘L fuq minn seklu ilu t-teologu Handley Moul qal hekk, "M'hemm l-ebda sitwazzjoni hekk
kaotika li Alla ma jistax joħloq minnha xi ħaġa mill-isbaħ. Dan seħħ fil-ħolqien, seħħ fuq is-
salib, u jseħħ illum." Jista’ jseħħ fiż-żwieġ tagħkom ukoll.
Addattat minn newsletter ta’ Kevin B. Bullard fuq http://www.marriageworks.us/

2. żuru l-webpage tal-Kummissjoni Familja Naxxar Għafas hawn biex tmur fil-paġna ● e-mail: familjiflimkien@gmail.com
The joy of ‘Yes Forever!’
One does not get married once all problems
are solved. One marries to face problems
together. It is possible to take the risk of
saying “forever”, it takes courage, but
“forever” brings joy and allows us to look to
the future with hope. Many people are
afraid of making decisions for all their lives,
because it seems impossible. Many say, 'We
will stay together for as long as our love lasts'.
But what is ‘Love’?
A mere emotion, a psycho-physical state? If
it is just this, it cannot provide the foundation
for building something solid. If however love
is a relationship, then it is a growing reality,
that it is built in the same way that we build a
house. And we build a house together! You
would not wish to build on the shifting sands
of emotions, but on the rock of true love, the
love that comes from God. The family is born
of this project of love that wishes to grow, as
one builds a house that becomes the locus
of affection, help, hope and support. Just as
God's love is stable and lasts forever, we
want the love on which a family is based to
be stable and to last forever. We must not
allow ourselves to be conquered by a
'throwaway culture'.
Give us this day our daily love
This fear of 'forever' is cured by entrusting
oneself to Jesus in a life that becomes a
spiritual path of shared growth, day by day.
'Forever' is not simply a question of duration!
A marriage does not succeed just because it
lasts; its quality is important. To stay together
and to know how to love each other forever
is the challenge married couples face! In the
Our Father prayer we say, 'Give us this day
our daily bread'. Married couples should
also pray, 'Give us this day our daily love',
teach us to love each other, to care for
each other. The more you entrust yourselves
to the Lord, the more your love will be
'forever', able to renew itself and to
overcome every difficulty.
Please, thank you, sorry ...
Living together is an art, a patient, beautiful
and fascinating journey, which can be
summarised in three words: please, thank
you and sorry. 'Please' is a request to enter
into the life of someone else with respect
and care. True love does not impose itself
with hardness and aggression. St. Francis
said that 'courtesy is the sister of charity, it
extinguishes hatred and kindles love'. And
today, in our families, there is a need for far
more courtesy. 'Thank you': gratitude is an
important sentiment. In your relationship, it is
important to keep alive your awareness that
the other person is a gift from God, and we
should always give thanks for gifts from God.
It is not merely a word to use with strangers,
to be polite. It is necessary to know how to
say thankyou, to journey ahead together.
'Sorry'. In our lives we make many mistakes.
We all do. And this is why we need to be
able to use this simple word, 'sorry'. In
general we are all ready to accuse others
and to justify ourselves. It is an instinct that
lies at the origins of many disasters. Let us
learn to recognise our mistakes and to
apologise. We are all aware that the
perfect family does not exist, nor does the
perfect husband, nor the perfect wife. We
exist and we are sinners. Jesus, who knows
us well, teaches us: never let a day go by
without asking for forgiveness, or without
restoring peace to your home. If we learn to
apologise and to forgive each other, the
marriage will last.
Adapted from a talk by Pope Francis to engaged couples
in St. Peter’s Square on 14 February 2014