Becoming a person of influence session handout

Becoming a Person of Influence
How to Positively Impact the
Lives of Others
Copyright © Corporate Edge Asia Pte Ltd

All rights reserved. No part of this product may be reproduced, distributed, or
transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other
electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the
publisher.
Document Revision
Revision Date 1/7/2015
Table of Contents
Becoming a Person of Influence 3
Leadership is Influence 3
Influence Inventory 4
What's your style? 4
Influencing Style 9
How to change my style 9
10 Ways to Increase Influence 10
How will I change? 10

Leadership is Influence
How we influence others is a choice. We can choose to
be influencers who pull people towards our argument or
we can push them towards it. We can choose to be
passive or active in our influencing.
Leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less. Dr
John C. Maxwell.

Influence Inventory
What's your style?
Influence, like leadership, is situational. There is no one
correct style. No one way that works for all people.
Flexibility in style is key to be able to influence those you
will need to during your life.
Think of the people you surround yourself with (your
chosen inner circle) and you’ll probably find that they
are very much like you.

Influence Inventory
What's your style?
The Conqueror and the Controller are more PUSH in
their approach, more assertive and logical. Conductors
and Connectors tend to be more emotional and PULL
people toward them. The Conjuror, juggles the two in
the middle.
Asserting: Stating preferences clearly and applying
pressure - Conqueror

Influence Inventory
What's your style?
Rationalizing: Using logic and reasoning to present your
ideas - Controller
Negotiating: Compromising and making concessions to
find common ground - Conjuror

Influence Inventory
What's your style?
Bridging: Engaging and connecting with others –
Connector
Inspiring: Influencing others through shared purposes
and broader possibilities Conductor

Influence Inventory
What's your style?
Consider how you influence others. List the top 3
characteristics of how you influence others. Be honest
and completely candid. Think of your boss, your peers,
your family, your friends.
Are you forceful, do you respect them always, do you
manipulate, perhaps intimidate. Do you give much and
gain little? Do you trade or barter. Do you expect
reciprocity?
To more readily and sustainably influence others you
want to be less PUSH, and more PULL.

Influencing Style
How to change my style
INFLUENCER makes for an easy to recall acronym.

10 Ways to Increase Influence
How will I change?
Remember these will be things that you WILL do, not
just can do, but actually do them.

How will I change?
Integrity cannot be purchased on a whim; rather, it’s
shaped by each ethical decision you make. Your
integrity is your responsibility. It’s an inside job, the
cumulative effect of your choices in life.
Integrity matters, because it’s the gateway to trust, and
only by establishing trust can you gain the right to
influence others.
Q. What qualities define a person of integrity?
Q. In which areas of life are you completely trustworthy?
When is it the hardest for you to act with integrity?
Trust is the glue that holds people together.
• Does my organization have good written values?
• Do the leaders practice and model them for
others?
• Do I place the interests of my people above my
own?
• Am I accountable to others for my actions?
• Since I know myself best, do I like who I am?

How will I change?
Influencers pay attention to the needs of those around
them, and then pour themselves out to meet those
needs. The average person goes through life looking
for validation. They want to know they’re respected
and valued. Leaders nurture others by extending
genuine care, offering a sense of belonging, and
being generous with encouragement.
Q. In what practical ways can you show that you value
your co-workers?
Q. What needs do you have that must be filled in order
for you to enjoy your job?
Nurturing people:
- Does not mean needing people
- Does mean commitment to people
- Does mean loving people
- Does mean lifting people to a higher level

How will I change?
Most people have a deficit of self-belief. As such, they
gravitate to leaders who recognize their abilities and
believe in their potential. A person of influence
demonstrates faith in others by helping them to visualize
success, celebrate victories, and learn from failure.
Q. How does it feel when others question your talent
and doubt your ability to deliver results?
Q. Why do people generally perform in line with the
expectations others have of them?
Assets make things possible
People make things happen
Fear – if we are afraid of people we cannot confront
them
Dislike – if we dislike people we should not lead them
Contempt – if we look down on people, we will not value
them
1. Borrowed beliefs have no power
2. We become outside what we believe inside
3. Lack of belief in people hurts both the leader and
the people
4. The greatest gift a leader gives another person is
to express belief in that person when that person
doesn’t believe in himself
Listening communicates respect. When leaders are
attentive to the ideas and concerns of teammates, they
generate strong relationships and increase their
knowledge. By hearing what others have to say—both
the good and the bad—leaders not only are better

How will I change?
positioned to make decisions but they also earn the
loyalty of followers.
Q. What behaviours, both conscious and unconscious,
prevent you from listening?
Q. how do people respond when they feel repeatedly
ignored?
Look at speaker – meanings are not in words, but in
people
Ask questions – this is the quickest way to become a
listener
Don’t interrupt – it is just as rude to step on people’s
ideas as it is to step on their toes.
Don’t change subject – listening is wanting to hear
Emotion – leaders must keep current of the
undercurrents
Responsive listening – when people feel that their leads
no longer listens or responds, they will go somewhere
else
To become a better listener:
What is their heart? What is their hope?
What is their hurt? How can I help?
To win influence, you have to step outside the confines
of your perspective to consider the viewpoints of
others. Nobody cares how much you know until they
know how much you are. Before asking to be
understood, devote effort to understand the other
person’s point of view.
Q. Why is it so frustrating to be around someone who
always has to be “right?”

How will I change?
Q. How can two people see the same circumstances and
draw conclusions that aren’t even close to being the
same?
Why relationships fail:
- Fear which causes us to erect barriers
- Selfishness which causes us to focus on self
instead of others
Keys…
Influencers are investors in people. They make deposits
of time and energy to lift others to a high level of living.
Through mentoring and coaching, leaders set up others
for success by focusing on their strengths and tapping
into their passions.
Q. Describe a time when you felt belittled by a leader.
What happened? How did it affect your relationship to
him or her?
Q. How have you benefitted from having a mentor or
enlarger invest in your life?
You cannot give what you do not have
Success is knowing your purpose in life, growing to your
maximum potential, and sowing seeds that benefit
others
Success – when you work hard to better yourself
Significance – when you work hard to better others

How will I change?
A surprising number of people float through life without
a defined destination. Leaders help others navigate
toward goals and dreams by identifying how they need
to grow and what they need to know. A good navigator
also assists others in making course corrections by
steering them clear of distractions and guiding them
down the simplest path to success.
Q When have you felt disoriented or off-track in your
career? How did you get back on course?
Q The wrong kind of criticism can block our growth. How
have you faced destructive criticism in life, and how did
you navigate around it?
There are those who can see the problem ahead and
avoid it.
There are those who can see the problem and fix it.
There are those who cannot see the problem or fix it
and they are overwhelmed.
A leader is one who sees more than others see, farther
than others see, before others see
1. Experience – been there did that
2. Success – been there did that successfully
3. Responsibility – I’m willing to take others on the
trip
4. Communication – Encouraging –honest –
continual
5. Partnership – we go together – we help each
other

How will I change?
Weak leaders sometimes get so caught up in the vision
of where they’re going that they forget about the
people they’re supposed to lead. If you take people for
granted, then you’ll not be able to link up with them to
achieve anything great. Influential people know that
they depend upon others to achieve the dream. For this
reason, they initiate relationships, look for common
ground, and learn how to motivate those around them.
Q. How can a person’s competitive nature prevent him
or her from connecting with others?
Q. Why, in the age of wireless communication, does
meaningful human connection seem to be harder than
ever?
Credibility + Communication = Connections
Go to their world. Communicate from the heart. Find the
key to their life.

How will I change?
Empowerment doesn’t mean dumping assignments on
subordinates or delegating every conceivable task.
Instead of merely giving others something to do,
empowerment inspires them to see the person they can
be. Leaders empower others only in the context of a
committed relationship. This includes modelling
leadership behaviours, coaching a winning attitude, and
instilling confidence.
Q. At times, being delegated to can feel like an honour.
Other times, it feels demeaning. What makes the
difference?
Q. What fears cause leaders to hold tightly to power and
prevent them from transferring authority to
followers?
Determine not to know everything, not to know
everything first, not to become the primary source of
communication, to let someone else represent you,
to stay with your strengths.
Empowerment means:
1. Seeing the potential of the individual and the
proper fit for the job
2. Saying words that encourage, equip and
empower that person
3. Sharing your knowledge, experience and
influence with them
4. Showing to others your belief in and power given
to that person
Leaders who reproduce their influence lead themselves
exceptionally well. Not only do reproducers model
leadership through their actions, they also mentor and

How will I change?
equip others through intentional coaching and
conversation. Leaders who enjoy feeling relied upon
seldom reproduce influence through others. Rather,
influencers who achieve multiplication do so by raising
others up and then stepping aside.
Q. How many people on your team are involved in
making the truly big decisions? Would it be healthier
to add more decision-makers to the mix?
Q. How does an organization shift its focus from
producing star performers to creating team
victories?
80% of leaders attract followers
10% Attract leaders
5 % Reproduce leaders
1. Model good leadership
2. Provide leadership training
3. Provide leadership resources
4. Provide leadership experiences
5. Create a growth environment
Think about the easiest of these attributes for you and
which is most difficult. Who can you teach and who can
you learn from?

Becoming a person of influence session handout

More Related Content

What's hot

Viewers also liked

Similar to Becoming a person of influence session handout

More from Leadership AdvantEdge

In this document

Becoming a person of influence session handout