Successfully reported this slideshow.
We use your LinkedIn profile and activity data to personalize ads and to show you more relevant ads. You can change your ad preferences anytime.
With support from the hospital ad-
ministration and staff, the PNRC, and
the Samahang Magdalo - Gensan
Chapter, the progra...
Page 2
As we look forward into the year of the water
dragon: 2012 – the trends within our community,
demographic forces, t...
Page 3
tion of programs of
quality assurance.
Dr. Antoinette M. Ladio,
Medical specialist IV-
AQAS, Jennil G. Santo-
Leading a life
Living in an era where everybody
seems to struggle in a fast operational pace,
everyone’s focus has mostly ...
mayor, pulmonologist, spends her
time discussing on “Pneumonia”.
More lined up lectures were set
early this year, Dr. Rona...
The first stage involved cleaning the entire
premises of the hospital. The second stage
of the race was mind games such as...
Chapter 1: The Beginning of Wonder
At the strike of six in the evening, the employees have transformed into enchanted mor-...
Public or Private?
A patient’s relative de-
sires to transfer his pa-
tient from the ward to
another room:
Nurse: “Sir, an...
Upcoming SlideShare
Loading in …5

Gazette 2012 january


Published on

Published in: Health & Medicine, Business
  • Be the first to comment

  • Be the first to like this

Gazette 2012 january

  1. 1. With support from the hospital ad- ministration and staff, the PNRC, and the Samahang Magdalo - Gensan Chapter, the program came into fruition after collecting fifty-one (51) bags of donated blood which were then sent to the PNRC Blood Bank. Later on Feb- ruary 25, another blood letting program will be conducted to continually pursue such endeavor. The blood letting activity is just one of the many community outreach pro- grams of St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. in order to show its commitment of ser- vice not only to the patients but also to the constituents of Gen. Santos City and the whole Socksargen area. To donate blood, call (083) 552- 3162 loc.105 or 0932-694-9807. AS MORE AND MORE PEOPLE re- quired blood t r a n s f u s i o n s each day and yet a steady decline of people donat- ing blood, it is but inevitable that the Philippine National Red Cross (PNRC) Gen-Sar Chapter Blood Bank, which supplies donated blood to nearly all hospitals of the city, would at some point in time face a crisis. But it is never too late. Last January 20, 2012, St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc., under the leadership of its training officer, Efren T. Catimbang Jr., RN, answered the dire need to re- plenish the chapter's supply of donated blood through a blood letting activity. "Initially, we had planned to sponsor the blood letting activity on February 25 this year, but we de- cided to conduct it earlier after getting a call from the PNRC," says Mr. Catim- bang. He noted that low levels of blood supply could prove lethal for some pa- tients especially trauma cases and any delay in providing sufficient amounts of appropriate blood types for patients could make a life and death difference. SEHI answers urgent call for blood January 2012 Volume III Issue 1 IN THIS ISSUE: GREEN THUMBS. Nurses take part in the fight 3 THE 5S WAY. Writer Argentina Roma shares the Japanese fail-safe method for total or- ganization. 4 SPORTSFEST. Read how SEHI employees 6 MAGICAL CHRISTMAS. Discover the fairytale- like wonders of SEHI’s Christmas Party. 7 JUST FOR LAUGHS. PAMELA AQUINO shares with us some funny moments happening around the hospital. 8 BY DARYL PANERIO Ronald Limon, SEHI Safety Officer, gives out a portion of his lifeblood to help in- crease the PNRC’s dwindling supply of donated blood.
  2. 2. Page 2 As we look forward into the year of the water dragon: 2012 – the trends within our community, demographic forces, technological shifts – noth- ing suggests that the ride is going to be much eas- ier. In fact, the ride is going to be much wilder, more turbulent than ever. But don’t fret because we will be prepared. The skills that we most need to learn in order to survive and thrive are the skills of dealing with change. An article ‘Leading a life the 5S way’ by Argentina S. Roma, tells us of a commendable Japanese practice of sorting, systematizing, sweeping, sanitizing, and acquiring self-discipline that will likely enhance service quality, productiv- ity, safety and reliability. Our seminar on total quality management has provided us with inputs and skills on how to be of great service to our pa- tients by doing things right the first time. Hospital activities like the Sportsfest and Fun Runimbues the spirit of camaraderie and sportsmanship among employees and organizational leaders. And as the hospital’s 50th Foundation Anniversary comes close, more fun-filled and enriching events are expected to line up this year. Also, this 2012, with the help from the staff of the Corporate Plan- ning Office, the official hospital publication – the Gazette – will not only be publishing through printouts but also online through the SEHI website. By embarking on this task, the publication will be able to increase the expanse of its potential readers as well as show the world the beauty of St. Elizabeth Hospital. We even stepped back a little to see what a bit of fine tuning we could do, and voila, we now have a new and improved Gazette. So expect the Gazette to be trendier, friendlier, easier to read, and best of all, more informative. Change is inevitable. In as much as you want to take a halt, the world will keep on moving and you will keep on moving. Change will always have its ups and downs; its pros and cons. The com- pany had already made the first step. Now, it is up to you to make yours; whether you will change gradually or incrementally – as long as you can change for the good. Happy New Year and happy reading! Daryl Panerio Change is good! Most of us live - and even think - as if the world were static, or as if it should be. As individuals, as profes- sionals, and as members or leaders of organizations, too often the way we act, plan, and react betrays the assumption that tomorrow will be much like today, that we'll slide by all right if we just get a little better, a little smarter, at doing what we are already doing. But no! The reality is quite different. Looking back at 2011, a lot of changes had transpired within our hospital. From center of safety, St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. advanced to center of quality. New services of- fered, old structures remodeled, new rules established. We greeted new faces and even bid farewell to some of our colleagues. All of us dealt with change: some drastically, some subtly.
  3. 3. Page 3 tion of programs of quality assurance. Dr. Antoinette M. Ladio, Medical specialist IV- AQAS, Jennil G. Santo- cildes and Ramil J. Sangco, RN, social insur- ance officers of PHIC Re- gional office, spearheaded the conduct of the inspec- tion. Ms. Liza R. Hidalgo, MRD head reveals that on the specific areas, analysis or chart audit and filing and retrieval propel the highlight of the success. “If you do not have a good filing system, definitely disorder and breakdown The Medical Records De- partment, Area 5 on Infor- mation Management, gained a perfect rating among the seven critical areas on im- proving quality care on the concluded March 22 and 23, 2011 PHIC inspection accrediting Saint Elizabeth Hospital Incorporated as Center of Quality. The Philippine Health Insur- ance Corporation (PHIC) isn't only about universal social insurance coverage. The National Health Insurane Act of 1995, explicitly man- dates the PHIC to promote the improvement in the quality of health services through the institutionaliza- will happen," she adds. The MRD is under the um- brella of the Assistant Medical Director, Dr. Ronaldo G. Veneracion of whom as per consensus of the staff is ever-supportive to all the endeavors with- out counting the cost. He remarked, “There’s always a room for improvement and we should not stop improving even in a 100% rating." The inspectors noted that the teamwork and coop- eration of the heads and staff alike is attributed to the strong and consistent management support. MRD gets 100% on PHIC ABOVE. SEHI nurses join hands in protecting the environment and preventing global warming. Nurses join tree planting advocacy BY MA. LEDY EMERY YUMANG during the course of her service. The activity aimed to protect the environment in response to global warming and the alarming number of floods caused by illegal logging. It was participated by the Medical Society members, the Philippine Nurses Asso- ciation (PNA) members and Philippine Nursing Student Association(PNSA) mem- bers. SEH representatives were Ms. JoannSienes, RN, Ms. Elvira Morales, RN, Mr. ReyconradRacosas, RN, Ms. Karla Matela, RN, Mr. Arthur Fernandez, RN and Ms. Ar- More than just knowing how to save patients’ lives, SEHI nurses have proven that they too have the heart and com- passion to care for the planet. On January 22, 2012, SEHI nurses, along with the Gen- eral Santos City Medical So- ciety,participated in the Tree Planting Activity: Save the Earth held ina three-hectare landfill located at BarangaySi- nawal, General Santos City. The activity was spearheaded by the medical society presi- dent and also SEH chief of clinics Dr. Ma. Helena Ven- eracion-Garcia. It was a jumpstart for Dr. Garcia’s thrust in promoting environ- mental care and protection gentina Roma, RN. Participants assembled in front of GENMEDEX building at around five in the morn- ing. It was followed by a convoy towards the area. Amidst the pouring rain, health workers gathered all seedlings and planted them across the land. The activity promoted camaraderie among the members of dif- ferent organizations. Since most physicians brought with them their family mem- bers, the activity also served as a unique family bonding experience. BY ARGENTINA ROMA GSCMS Pres. Ma. Helena Veneracion Garcia, MD carries with her the sprouts for a greener future through the tree planting event.
  4. 4. Leading a life Living in an era where everybody seems to struggle in a fast operational pace, everyone’s focus has mostly shifted at the quality of their work and has taken much less attention on the quality of life they lead. Though work is an essential part of life, it’s a different thing when you place the thought the other way around. The quest for advancement in work performance must be rooted from the desire to boost up the totality of our existence. In search for financial progression which may aid in economy improvement, strate- gies had been schemed in order to enhance service quality, productivity, safety and reli- ability. One of the commendable programs was the 5S process structured by the Japa- nese. It is used to systematically achieve total or- ganization, cleanliness, and standardization in the workplace. Its practice leads to im- provement and it boosts the morale of the workers, promoting a sense of pride in their work and ownership of their responsibili- ties. It has been continuously promoted because it had generated a lot of positive effects. Looking at it closely, one will be able to real- ize that this process could also be inte- grated into our personal lives. The 5S can do more than just solve institu- tion’s housekeeping issues and resource care. The essence of the plot once prac- ticed, could actually have a great impact on each one’s journey. The first S is SEIRI or SORT. It is an ac- tion to identify and eliminate unnecessary items from your work- place. A famous author once noted that we have to know our purpose for being and we should learn how to reach the end of the line feeling victorious for we have fulfilled our life’s mean- ing. Oftentimes, we don’t get inspired to move forward because a lot of obstacles are blocking our way. Sometimes the clutters in our life that we needed to sort are those that are invisible to the eye yet monstrous enough to scare and halt us from keeping our eyes on the goal. These are unnecessary items that keep on holding us back. These may include fear, pride, insecurities and distorted jaded perceptions on life. Sort these things and let them go. Free yourself The second S is SEITON or SYSTEMATIZED. It is an action to put every necessary item in good order. This life is yours to live. Opt to live it, the excellent way. You are endowed with opportunities for you to take. Be the captain of your own ship. Plan the map of your life. What you will become in the future is the fruit of your thoughts and the choices that you make now. So in everything you do, do it right the first time. way The third S is SEISO or SWEEP. It is an action to clean your workplace thoroughly. This part of the system emphasizes that we should not wait for things to get dirty. It’s the same thing with your life; don’t wait till everything is all messed up. Strive to work out things before problems arise. Develop attitudes that will yield career efficiency and aid in nurturing your relationships with others. The fourth S is SEIKETSU or SANITIZE. It is a condition where a high standard of good housekeeping is maintained. This part of the system uses visual control signs and fool proofing to maintain outstanding work performance. In this same way, we should also direct our lives with values that will help us avoid committing mistakes. Life is a game of temptations and so we have to be strong and stand our grounds against it. Solely, we may be feeble but with God’s guidance we will surely be able to combat those wicked encounters. The fifth S is SHITSUKE or SELF DISCIPLINE. It is a condition where the 4S is practiced spontaneously and willingly as a way of life. The only way that we can sustain a worthy life is by bearing in our hearts the weight of the lessons brought by each step. Let us walk through this life guided by these principles. Let us choose to be grateful for what we have rather than to grumble, to respond to the needs of others than to rant about their difference and lastly, to bless the world amidst all the troubles present. From now on, be challenged to become living examples of 5S. Page 4 BY ARGENTINA ROMA
  5. 5. mayor, pulmonologist, spends her time discussing on “Pneumonia”. More lined up lectures were set early this year, Dr. Ronaldo G. Veneracion, urologist, talked about “Urinary Tract Infection” last Janu- ary 25, 2012. This February, Dr. Analyza Galia, endocrinologist, will present her views on "Self Man- agement of Diabetes”. Patients, health care providers and care givers are encouraged to take ad- vantage of this opportunity to re- ceive information on the latest trends of these diseases, to de- velop health care plans and other skills that will minimize catastro- phic complications. The lectures will be followed by questions and answers. Admission is free. Pa- tients’ council is an informal as- sembly of patients and their fami- lies organized and coordinated by the Quality Assurance Office with the participation of a multi- disciplinary group composed of physicians, nurses and other sup- port groups. The St. Elizabeth Hospital staff conducted a series of patients’ council at Retro Hall, Training Center, SEHI Compound as a venue for the patients to express their views and opinions regard- ing their health condition and to encourage patient and family members to know more about their illness, get involve in their care and create awareness. Spearheaded by Ms. Czakei Faye Patino RND, Training Officer, several speakers were invited namely Dr. Annie Yabut who dis- cussed on “Silent killer- Hyper- tension”. A fun-filled lecture about “Family Planning” was shared by Ms. Mae R. Lomboy, RN, the SEHI Lactation specialist. Re-echoing the seminar she at- tended from Manila, Ms. Joann Sienes, RN lectured on “Multi- drug-resistant Tuberculosis in the Philippines”. Meanwhile, Dr. An- gelito Balay expertly tackled on “Acute Gastroenteritis (AGE)”. Ms. Mayniel Bayudan shows her expertise on “Tuberculosis” and lastly, Dr. Ma. Antonietta Monte- SEHI INITIATES PATIENTS’ COUNCIL JCV CELEBRATES BIRTHDAY Dr. Jesus C. Veneracion, medical director, cele- brates his 78th birthday last January 11, 2012 . Dr. Veneracion , who has been in the service for 49 years, is one of the pillars for the many suc- cesses achieved by the hospital. The celebration started off with a thanksgiving mass officiated by Rev. Fr. Ivan Obando, OP and Rev. Fr. Ching Salibay, OP at the hospital chapel. In attendance during the mass were the family of Dr. Veneracion including numerous presence of SEHI employees and the family’s friends which completely filled up the chapel. A short program and a luncheon was then held at the Retro Hall which was highlighted by the birthday messages and wishes of the dedicated employees and celebrants’ friends. Dr. Veneracion gave a short speech after the program. In his message, he challenged all the employees to have more focus on their work and to adhere on quality service. This year, the medical director's birthday was declared as special working holiday. November 17, 2011 – Employees of St. Elizabeth Hos- pital Inc. in General Santos City were involved in a series of activities in commemoration of our pa- troness, St. Elizabeth of Hungary. The day was started with Hataw Exercise at 4:30am and a Fun Run in downtown General Santos. After the work-out, “Kapehan sa Elizabeth” followed where the employees gathered for a steaming cup of coffee and some snacks. At around 6:00am, free screenings for Diabetes and Hypertension were provided and a Gift-Giving activity followed which gave smiles to over a hun- dred in-patients and indigent children from all over the city. A thanksgiving mass was then of- fered in the afternoon attended by active em- ployees and devotees of the patron saint at the hospital’s chapel. To recognize their unwavering loyalty to St. Eliza- beth Hospital Inc, thirty-two hospital personnel who have served the hospital for ten years or more were awarded for their noteworthy dedica- tion and service to the institution. (List of Employees Recognized and their corre- sponding Length of Service) NAME OF EMPLOYEE LENGTH OF SERVICE (in years) Almeria, Paquito D. 30 Bolio, Helen B. 25 Alcala, Janet M. 20 Retuya, Julio P. 20 Barot, Reynaldo V. 20 Caro, Eddie V. 20 Escleto, Jocevita T. 15 Dulalas, Rey D. 15 Pelomida, Theresa C. 15 Angeles, Alex Sr. R. 15 Bayudan, Mayniel A. 10 Salavia, Teresa S. 10 Solivio, Ulbedina E. 10 Niñal, Evimar G. 10 Bitalac, Joel B. 10 Cadotdot, Ramil O. 10 Reyes, Juditho L. 10 Sierte, Dinnes L. 10 Academia, Artemio A. 10 Catampatan, Antonio C. 10 Dorilag, Tom H. 10 Glorio, Liezl C. 10 Hechanova, Alvin A. 10 Ordiz, Loreto O. 10 Laude, Santiago Jr. H. 10 Aballe, Faustina G. 10 Tubon, Emilia V. 10 Dela Cerna, Mary Grace, J. 10 Maningding, Cecilia L. 10 Garcia, Maria Helena Veneracion 10 Palencia, Hector Pantilan 10 Page 5 SEHI Celebrates 49th Patronal Fiesta BY NEIL ARINZOL BY NEIL ARINZOL BY LEVIEN GAIL LEDESMA
  6. 6. The first stage involved cleaning the entire premises of the hospital. The second stage of the race was mind games such as puzzles and the famed Pinoy henyo. The last stage of the games, apparently the most challenging, involved catching a pig, climbing poles, egg harvesting, thrusting your hand into a box of cockroaches to obtain a coin, and having a snake wrapped around your shoulders while answering a question. In the end, the Orange team proved to be the victor, winning Php 8,000.00 in cash. Com- ing in second was the Violet team raking in Php 6,000.00. Third place was the Grey team, winning Php 4,000.00. In fourth place was the Yellow team securing themselves Php 2,000.00. The month of June saw the bowling competi- tion that was held at Tokyok Super Lanes. In the end, the Orange team took home the crown. The Oval Plaza City Court played host to the volleyball games that took place last July when the Yellow team seized the top spot on the said sport. Badminton and Table tennis were the sports played during the month of August held at Big Shot Badminton Court. Each sport had men and women competing in teams. Emerging champion in men’s bad- minton was the Yellow team. The Orange team won in women’s badminton. The Grey team placed first in women’s table tennis, while the Orange team triumphed in men’s table tennis. No event was held from September onwards. Indoor games such as dart and chess are still to be done. The Cheerdancing competition will highlight the Sportsfest celebration during the finals on May 2012. Winners of the respective events will be awarded on the culmination of the Sportsfest during the launching of the 50th Foundation Day celebration of St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. In an industry where staff turnover is but fleeting, sometimes it’s inevitable that comradeship goes weak. As part of an enduring tradition which aims to imbue the spirit of camaraderie and sportsmanship among its employees, St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. launched its annual Sportsfest celebration last May 12, 2011 during the institution’s 49th Foundation Day celebration. “The Sportsfest is not only held just because it is hospital tradition,” said Mr. Dennis Louie Hudieres, program organizer, “but is also held for the benefit of its employ- ees.” “It gives us a chance to enjoy and have fun after a day’s work. Furthermore, it gives us the opportunity to meet and socialize with new employees of the hospital,” he added. The actualization of this tradition, Mr. Hudieres asserted, could not have been made possible without the help of the depart- ment heads: Ms. Maieth Conlu and Mr. Nonoy Panday from the Business Office; Mr. Joel Bitalac and Mr. Arvin Pineda from the General Service Office; Ms. Aster May Aso and Ms. Elvira Morales from the Nursing Service Office; and Mr. Nards Perez from the Diagnostics. “The Sportsfest could have been scrapped from last year’s activities if not for the insistence of the employees and their department heads,” revealed Mr. Hudieres. Realization A four-way battle among the Business Office (the Orange team), the Nursing Service Office (the Violet team), the General Service Office (the Yellow team), and the Diagnostics De- partment (the Grey team), the Sportsfest kicked off last May 11, 2011 with the Amaz- ing Race. The Amazing Race, an idea from Chief of Clinics Dr. Ma. Helena Veneracion-Garcia, is a game that would test not only one’s agility and physical strength, but also one’s intellec- tual acuity. It was made up of three stages. SportsFest: The Show Will Go On! By Ms. Pamela Aquino, RN Page 6
  7. 7. Chapter 1: The Beginning of Wonder At the strike of six in the evening, the employees have transformed into enchanted mor- tals, prince and princesses, witches and wizards, fairies, and exquisite charmed beings – all excited to join and witness the night’s festivities of splendour and bliss. The series of spectacular events began with a production number of excerpts inspired by Disney’s magical world. A three-part presentation beginning with a stunning waltz to the tune of Beauty and the Beast, a hip-swaying sing and dance number from Hercules, capped off by a duo performance of a love shared between Ariel and Eric from the Little Mermaid. Most certainly, it was a start of what lies ahead. Chapter II: A Pageant of Creatures Lights were then turned off. An unfamiliar sound of enchantment then arose from the midst of the ballroom and with it came forth winged beings from the Nursing Service, creatures known as Avariels, the most striking of the elven races with their soft, feathered wings. Cheers from the entire kingdom could be heard as these beings take a long walk show- casing their utmost radiance. As their sound came to a halt, two familiar faces then emerged from afar, the hero and heroine known to many as Alladin and Jasmine from the Diagnostics. Garbed in their luxurious Arabian attire and coupled with a splendid musical play of the song A Whole New World, the couple took their position up on the stage for everyone to see and remember the love they both shared. After some time, a famous fictional character wearing a green mini dress and a magic wand arose; the common fairy named Tinkerbell was escorted by Peter Pan’s arch neme- sis, Captain Hook. The townsmen from the Logistics were in a riot cheering for their bet. How ironic the combination of Tinkerbell and Captain Hook but no unfortunate events were brought about for the reason they all came was to celebrate. Then there came along the princes and princesses from the fairyland of Business Office. Strolling down the aisle are these mythical creatures human in ap- pearance but having magical powers, dressed with colourful silks and butterfly wings. Chapter III: The Feast A bountiful feast was also prepared for all of the crea- tures. Scrumptious delicacies were served for them to enjoy. To set the mood for the continuation of the night’s celebration a parade of magical winged beings was witnessed; truly a feast for the tummy and the eyes. Chapter IV: The Crowning of Honours The next prepared event was a showcase of talents, wherein representatives from the different groups are given the challenge of combining modern music with traditional Christmas Carols. It was indeed a close fight amongst all of the contenders. The announce- ment of the winners then followed. The 5S Parol Competition Winners were announced, the Clinical Laboratory came out on top. The Avariels were announced as the best in magical costume and the group from the Logistics topped all of the con- tenders for the Dance Competition. A surprise announcement of the Prince and Princess of the Night, Villain of the Night, Magical Disney Char- acter and Fairest of them All was also brought about. Major Prizes for twenty-six lucky individuals were also set to be given away where winners can bring home Air-conditioners, Refrigerators and many more appli- ances and gadgets. Chapter V: The True Magic of Christmas The night came close to the end as everyone sang together as a community with “Sa Araw ng Pasko” and “Christmas in our Hearts”. A time for merry-making and joyful dance was also granted to all those who came. Indeed it was a night of grandeur and merriment, however the true spark of magic is found within the hearts of the entire SEHI family, for the happiness and love that the one true Creator had bestowed upon His creatures. And though the magical night had already come to a won- derful end, the spirit of sharing magic to those we meet in our everyday lives would hopefully still shine through. A Night of Magical Christmas Page 7 BY DESIREE JOYA GO
  8. 8. Public or Private? A patient’s relative de- sires to transfer his pa- tient from the ward to another room: Nurse: “Sir, anong gusto niyong room na lipatan? Overheard at SEH One would think a hospital as a gloomy and morbid place. But at St. Elizabeth’s, that isn’t the always case. Minus Points Social worker: “Good afternoon, Ma’am! Pasok po kayo.” Client: “Maayong hapon, Ma’am. Gikan na ko ug PCSO. Mangayo unta ko ug MEDICAL SUBTRACT.” Weird X-ray A nurse is accompanying a patient for x-ray of the sinuses. Nurse: “Ma’am, patient Santos nandito na po!” Radtech: “Ah, unsa gani na iyang procedure?” Nurse: “Ma’am, mao ni tung WATCHER’S VIEW!” (correct term: Water’s View) Medicinal Fruit During rounds, the doctor ordered: Include banana in the diet. Carrying out the doctor’s order, the nurse trainee asks the senior nurse, “Ma’am, mag-drug study pa ako ng banana?” Soft Words As the morning shift draws to a close, the nurse-on-duty fol- lowed up the attending physi- cian who had not yet made their hospital visit. Nurse’s SMS: “Good PM po, doc. SEH Station ** po. Gentle reminder lang po doc not yet seen pa po si patient ***** of room ***.” Doctor’s SMS: “Gentle reply. Coming.” Wrong Guy After being informed by the ER staff to prepare a com- plete set of oxygen for the admission, Nurse 1 began to look for a janitorial staff. Nurse 1: (spotting a male in white shirt, jeans, and rubber shoes) “Sir! Sir!” Male: (approaches the nurse) “Unsa, Ma’am?” Nurse 1: “Pabutang daw ko ug oxygen sa room ***.” Male: (stares at Nurse 1, nods his head and walks away) Nurse 2 to Nurse 1: “Wui! Watcher man to ni patient *****!” BY PAMELA AQUINO Twisted Translation A nurse instructs a patient to never forget to do deep breathing exer- cises. “Sir, ayaw kalimot ug gin- Liking it Raw The patient’s diet was changed from General Liquids to Diet As Tolerated with two hard boiled eggs per day. Nurse: (instructing) “Ma’am, pakan-a siya’g itlog ha.” Presumably Wrong Findings A patient’s chest x-ray result showed no significant chest findings. Frustrated because of the persistence of cough despite negative results, he vents out his feelings to the nurse. Patient: “Unsa ba na inyong x-ray? Makit-an ba na niya kung naa koy plemas? Daghan-daghan baya akong plemas, ga-yellow na. Naabot na diri akong plemas.” (touches his cheeks and forehead) Nurse: “Maabot diay dira ‘tay imong plemas?” Patient: “Oo! Abot jud! Daghan kaayo! Unsa mana inyong x-ray mu- ingon nga wala koy pulmonary nga naa man koy pulmonary!” NOSE-BLEED A patient was admitted due to nosebleed. A nurse asks the mother, “Ma’am, asa nagasunggo ang bata? sa ilong?” Misprinted Nurse 1: I-start na ning tambal ni pt. ***, murag makaIELTS jud ka ani, Norwegian ingon sa face sheet. Nurse 2: (Enters the room) Good evening maam, I am going to give your antibiotic, but before that we have to perform a skin test to know if you are allergic or not. (Performs the skin test) Patient: Aguyy! Sakita oi. Nurse 2: (Ngee! Bisaya man diay ni.) Nurse 1: Maam, nanawag ang admitting, pakambyuhan ang face sheet, Pinoy man diay to. The Gazette Daryl Panerio Editor in Chief Livien Gail Ledesma Associate Editor Ma. Leda Emery Yumang Managing Editor Joann Sienes Circulation Editor Neil Arinzol News Editor Argentina Roma Features Editor Pamela Aquino Literary Editor Juvie May Bonifacio Layout Editor Crispy Dequilla Cartoonist Staff Writers: Kathlyn Chloe Fontanilla Mae Lomboy Francis Joseph Faeldonia Allan Fenequito Mark Reuben Arat EDITORIAL CONSULTANTS Ma. Helena Veneracion-Garcia, MD Ronaldo Veneracion, MD