Earthsoft Foundation of GuidanceEdge-Aggressive-Reliable-Trust-Honesty-Soft-Obedient-Fun-Transparent                      ...
Index• Marriage• Happy living• Issues• Conflicts & resolution                           Making earth little softer
Objective• To understand divorce & its impact• To understand the reasons of incompatibility• To strengthen intellectual, e...
Reasons for marriageMarriage is a virtually universal human institutionRight reasons to marry• Companion throughout life, ...
Gain…• Long term relationship & stability• Better ritual culture due to common & deep  understanding, supportive for next ...
Successful marriageReasons for successful marriage• Common skills• Good emotional & physical health• High self esteem• Hig...
Start a day - Breakfast tableWhich scene do you want tosee across the breakfasttable for the rest of your life?           ...
Saying & believing!The value of person depends upon• Skills attained• Knowledge acquired• Money earned• Assets build• Good...
Partnering                  Caring   Loving                             Sharing  Environment                 Way of life  ...
Seven vows7 Vows- Promise to God to be partner throughout the life1.To walk together throughtout life to get pure food2.To...
Divorce• Divorce or the dissolution of marriage is the final  termination of a marital union, canceling the  legal duties ...
Reasons  Category                                ReasonSocial         Dowry harassment, Exploitation, Conservative approac...
Issues• Lack of understanding• Priorities differs• Methodologies differsAbove results in Disregard & Distrust, cyclecontin...
Before marriage• We hide the things……• We ignore……• We mislabel……• We agree on irrelevant matters…• We believe our loved o...
Voice before & after• “You are just made for me”• “You aren’t the man/woman I married”.• “I want you to be my partner for ...
Incompatibility & reasons• Intellectual gap• Physical, age-wise, health related, sex related• Comfort, Fun, Materialistic,...
Incompatibility                  Making earth little softer
Divorce globallyIn India divorce rate is doubled in last 7 years                                Making earth little softer
Mature steps neededDeath statistics in USA!Take mature steps related to love & marriage                                Mak...
Avoid divorceTo avoid  • Unhealthy life, psychological madness  • Loneliness & unhappiness  • Social insult over ability t...
Most effective-first hand solution• Think strategically about solution• Communicate & have a dialogue• Discuss, don’t quar...
Most effective-first hand solution• Be “REAL” & realistic• Plan for outing• Enhance listening abilities• Express issues, w...
Fight but marriage under hold• Unable to articulate all issues at one time• Unable to convince & conclude who is wrong?• U...
Happily married life• Bargaining – compromise with respect & dignity  (deal for both, remember marriage is not a deal!)• A...
TipsBeautiful tips• Do not hit head against wall• Know.....who matters• Acknowledgement is the first step towards  improve...
Accept totally• Lifetime to know each other• People do not really know each other well• Continue applying corrections & ke...
Key element• Commitment as a symbol, not as a contract• Equal focus on win-win, always!• Trust    which     offers    clos...
Thank You    Making earth little softer
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Earthsoft saving marriage-life and partner

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Conflict in marriage life? Wanting peace & happiness, read, understand & follow the tips.
Earthsoft Foundation of Guidance (EFG) is working as an NGO/NPO for students - Education & Career
guidance and for Professionals for soft skills enhancements. I am working on speading , sharing
knowledge; experience globally.It has uploaded important presentations at http://myefg.in/downloads.aspx.
Also https://dl.dropbox.com/u/83265908/Links-events.xls has links for all ppt files.

Read http://tl.gd/jm1gh5

Be mentor using your education, knowledge & experience to contribute for a social cause & do conduct
free training/ workshop seeking help of existing platforms like rotary,etc
Kindly spread to your friends.Thank you!

- Earthsoft Foundation of Guidance
Let us make earth little softer..

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Earthsoft saving marriage-life and partner

  1. 1. Earthsoft Foundation of GuidanceEdge-Aggressive-Reliable-Trust-Honesty-Soft-Obedient-Fun-Transparent Making earth little softer
  2. 2. Index• Marriage• Happy living• Issues• Conflicts & resolution Making earth little softer
  3. 3. Objective• To understand divorce & its impact• To understand the reasons of incompatibility• To strengthen intellectual, emotional and spiritual aspects of your personality• To select the best possible ways to save marriage life• To be happy in fulfilling your duties and responsibilities towards your spouse & families• To be a mature, spiritually & emotionally healthy and committed spouse• To prepare for future challenges and conflicts• To change & grow to be better person and well- adjusted marriage partner Making earth little softer
  4. 4. Reasons for marriageMarriage is a virtually universal human institutionRight reasons to marry• Companion throughout life, Unity• Togetherness - Sharing good or bad moments, realizing dreams together• Sharing, Loving, Caring, Giving• Continuing generation, beautiful creation – ChildWrong reasons to marry• Money, or just Papers• Position in company• Just to have kids• To serve ME Making earth little softer
  5. 5. Gain…• Long term relationship & stability• Better ritual culture due to common & deep understanding, supportive for next generation• Improved family relationship• Increased ownership, higher commitments• Feeling of proud of relationship• Feel of satisfaction & delight from peaceful & happy environment• Financially wealthy & successful• Active participation for function & celebration• Increased morale & no conflicts Making earth little softer
  6. 6. Successful marriageReasons for successful marriage• Common skills• Good emotional & physical health• High self esteem• High education level• High social status• Pressure from society & kids Making earth little softer
  7. 7. Start a day - Breakfast tableWhich scene do you want tosee across the breakfasttable for the rest of your life? Making earth little softer
  8. 8. Saying & believing!The value of person depends upon• Skills attained• Knowledge acquired• Money earned• Assets build• Good deeds executed• Relations maintained• Love spread and• Behavior exhibited!• There is nothing better in the world than a good wife. A good wife is the one whose husband becomes glad upon seeing her. Making earth little softer
  9. 9. Partnering Caring Loving Sharing Environment Way of life Culture Methodologies Partnering Trust Respect People Families Honesty Dignity Transparency Making earth little softer
  10. 10. Seven vows7 Vows- Promise to God to be partner throughout the life1.To walk together throughtout life to get pure food2.To walk together for a healthy & prosperous life, seeking physical, spiritual and mental health3.To support each other to be wealthy, asking strength to share the happiness and pain together.4.Determined for love and respect for each other and their respective families5.Pray for the beautiful, heroic & noble children6.Request for the peaceful long life with each other7.For companionship, togetherness, loyalty and understanding & to be friends for lifetimeMarriage is a symbol of purity, union of two differentpeople, community and culture Making earth little softer
  11. 11. Divorce• Divorce or the dissolution of marriage is the final termination of a marital union, canceling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between the partners!• As of 2011, divorce rate in India is 1.01 for every thousand marriages annually, is too high Making earth little softer
  12. 12. Reasons Category ReasonSocial Dowry harassment, Exploitation, Conservative approach Unbearable mental and physical torture Acceptance of divorced daughters, Change of views DINKS (double income no kids) couples Downfall of Joint family system Misunderstanding of Woman empowerment & equalityPersonality Non compatibility in social, economical, intellect status Lack of adaptability, lack of patience Domination, egoistic nature, Listen – serve to me attitude Extramarital affairs, Western culture influenceFinance Ability to be on own, Financial freedom Growth of individualism, High salaries Disputes over managing finance, I can do it better attitudeProfessional Work-life imbalance, Professional rivalryBehavior Lack of ethics and morals, Fashionable life style Lack of affection, Ignorance, Insulting, Disrespect Making earth little softer
  13. 13. Issues• Lack of understanding• Priorities differs• Methodologies differsAbove results in Disregard & Distrust, cyclecontinues• Missing on Loving, Caring, Sharing, Giving• Different values• Own world – Ignoring & not sharing time• Lack approval from family (for love marriage) Making earth little softer
  14. 14. Before marriage• We hide the things……• We ignore……• We mislabel……• We agree on irrelevant matters…• We believe our loved one will change after marriage Making earth little softer
  15. 15. Voice before & after• “You are just made for me”• “You aren’t the man/woman I married”.• “I want you to be my partner for all the births”• “You seem different now”.• “I am so lucky, feel like in heaven”• “It isn’t the same as when we were dating”.• “I trust you”• “You cheated me”. Making earth little softer
  16. 16. Incompatibility & reasons• Intellectual gap• Physical, age-wise, health related, sex related• Comfort, Fun, Materialistic, Financial instability• Spiritual differences• Social life style• Ego• Missing on expectations• Ability not to accommodate varieties• Methodology differs slightly• Twisted & distorted facts or inputs• Wrong impression / prejudice• Expectations to be ideal! Making earth little softer
  17. 17. Incompatibility Making earth little softer
  18. 18. Divorce globallyIn India divorce rate is doubled in last 7 years Making earth little softer
  19. 19. Mature steps neededDeath statistics in USA!Take mature steps related to love & marriage Making earth little softer
  20. 20. Avoid divorceTo avoid • Unhealthy life, psychological madness • Loneliness & unhappiness • Social insult over ability to manage • Lesser combined income • Risk of suicide for both & children • Shorter life expectancies• For children • Suffer physical health • Risk of school failure • Psychological distress & mental illness • Miss on guidance & developing Making earth little softer
  21. 21. Most effective-first hand solution• Think strategically about solution• Communicate & have a dialogue• Discuss, don’t quarrel• Clarify & Apologize if mistaken• Start clean slate & fresh• Enhance understanding• Set the guidelines if needed• Understand before being understood• Avoid to be misunderstood, make a point• Do not involve many• Acknowledge and respect individual identity• Avoid compromised & confused situation Making earth little softer
  22. 22. Most effective-first hand solution• Be “REAL” & realistic• Plan for outing• Enhance listening abilities• Express issues, wish and needs honestly• Understand viewpoints sincerely• Respect one another as peers & friends• Constructive resolutions build trust, follow those• Maintain a diary jotting down own mistakes Making earth little softer
  23. 23. Fight but marriage under hold• Unable to articulate all issues at one time• Unable to convince & conclude who is wrong?• Unable to address ego• Inability to stand on own• Social pressure• Deep responsibility of children & serious views not to ruin their lives• Unclear answer to What next?• If views till in favor to continue, not to cut thread• Compromising nature & patience• Hope is the strategy!!! (cannot be!) Making earth little softer
  24. 24. Happily married life• Bargaining – compromise with respect & dignity (deal for both, remember marriage is not a deal!)• Agreement as a gift (without resentment)• Coexistence – Agree (to disagree & live with it)The object of marriage = peaceful coexistence• Be totally honest and kind at the same time.• Control negative destructive impulses• Control your anger• Express your deepest fears, hopes, and emotions and everyday thoughts Making earth little softer
  25. 25. TipsBeautiful tips• Do not hit head against wall• Know.....who matters• Acknowledgement is the first step towards improvement• Never try to straighten dog’s tail• Keep cool & calm, grow and behave! Making earth little softer
  26. 26. Accept totally• Lifetime to know each other• People do not really know each other well• Continue applying corrections & keep aligning• Be flexible – unforeseen events will happen.• Be prepared for change – people change, situations shift, relationships take on new dimensions, Couples can cope & adapt• Have a positive attitude.• Express positive comments most of the time.• Criticism about inadequacies eliminates emotional space. Making earth little softer
  27. 27. Key element• Commitment as a symbol, not as a contract• Equal focus on win-win, always!• Trust which offers closeness, fluent communication & synergistic relationship• Mutual goals & objectives can be achieved with deep support• Continuous improve• Timely communication & responsiveness• Involvement of partners with each other , trust & respect for each other, must be magnified Making earth little softer
  28. 28. Thank You Making earth little softer

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