To understand the roots and causes of conflict To understand the potential of conflict for ill or for good To learn how to deal with conflicts through personal peacemaking To learn how to deal with conflicts through mediated peacemaking To follow God’s principles when conflicts cannot be resolved
God’s Principles Matthew 18:15-2015“If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If helistens to you, you have won your brother over.”
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-2621"You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, Do notmurder, and anyone who murderswill be subject to judgment. 22But I tell you that anyone who is angrywith his brother will be subject to
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-26judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, Raca, is answerable to the Sanhedrin. Butanyone who says, You fool! will be in danger of the fire of hell.
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-26 23"Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, 24leaveyour gift there in front of the altar.
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-26First go and be reconciled to yourbrother; then come and offer your gift.
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-2625"Settlematters quickly with your adversary who is taking you tocourt. Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the
God’s Principles Matthew 5:21-26 officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26I tell you the truth,you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.
God’s Principles Romans 12:18 18If it is possible, as far as itdepends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Key Insights• In any conflict situation, both parties are responsible before God to try to resolve it.• Both parties are accountable before God if one or both of them refuse to resolve it.• In some situations, conflicts may not be resolved peacefully because…
Key Insights• One or both may refuse to abide by Scriptural principles of peacemaking for various reasons.• In a stalemate the “cooperative” party must choose to respond biblically to the situation regardless of the other party’s unbiblical response.
Stalemate Options• Overlook the offense• Forgive the offender before God• Ask God for justice• Go your separate ways for the time being (truce)• Accept the unfairness and continue doing good.
Overlook the Offense Proverbs 10:1212 Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs. 1 Peter 4:88Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. 1 Corinthians 13:5 5(Love) keeps no record of wrongs.
Overlook the OffenseWhen not to overlook…• When God or His name is being blasphemed• When your relationship with the person has already been affected or changed• When other people are being hurt• When the truth of the Gospel is being compromised (i.e. when sin is involved)• When the offender is in danger of experiencing God’s wrath or judgment
Overlook the Offense Galatians 6:1-5 1Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore himgently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. 2Carry each others burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Overlook the Offense Galatians 6:1-53If anyone thinks he is something when heis nothing, he deceives himself. 4Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, 5for each one should carry his own load.
Forgive the OffenderInterpersonal Transaction before God Personal Transaction before God
Interpersonal Transaction Luke 17:3-4 "If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. 4If hesins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says, I repent, forgive him."
Personal Transaction Mark 11:2525And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."[
Forgive the OffenderWhen you forgive a person beforeGod…• You are not yet reconciled with that person.• You are only set free from the power of bitterness in your heart.
Ask God for Justice 1 Samuel 24:15 15 May the LORD be our judge anddecide between us. May he consider my cause and uphold it; may hevindicate me by delivering me from your hand.
Ask God for Justice Psalm 43:1 1Vindicate me, O God,and plead my cause against an ungodly nation;rescue me from deceitful and wicked men.
Ask God for Justice Psalm 54:1-21 Save me, O God, by your name; vindicate me by your might. 2 Hear my prayer, O God; listen to the words of my mouth.
Ask God for JusticeAsking God for justice does not mean taking revenge.It means you’re leaving the judgment to God by faith.
Ask God for Justice Romans 12:17-2117Do not repay anyone evil for evil.Be careful to do what is right in theeyes of everybody. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Ask God for Justice Romans 12:17-21 19Do not take revenge, my friends,but leave room for Gods wrath, forit is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
Ask God for Justice Romans 12:17-2120On the contrary: “If your enemy ishungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals onhis head.” 21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Part ways Acts 15:37-41 37Barnabas wanted to take John, alsocalled Mark, with them, 38but Paul didnot think it wise to take him, because he had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not continued with them in the work.
Part ways Acts 15:37-4139They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company. Barnabastook Mark and sailed for Cyprus, 40butPaul chose Silas and left, commended by the brothers to the grace of the Lord. 41He went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches.
Part ways 2 Timothy 4:1111Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry.
Part waysWhen you part ways…• Remember to pray for each other• Don’t malign each other at your back• Don’t add insult to injury• Speak well of each other• Avoid factionalism or triangulating• Don’t rejoice in times of failure
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1912Dearfriends, do not be surprised atthe painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1913But rejoice that you participate in thesufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-19 14Ifyou are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, forthe Spirit of glory and of God rests on you.
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-19 15If you suffer, it should not be as amurderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler.
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1916However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name.
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1917For it is time for judgment to beginwith the family of God; and if it beginswith us, what will the outcome be forthose who do not obey the gospel of God?
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1918And, "If it is hard for the righteous to be saved, what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?"
Accept the Unfairness 1 Peter 4:12-1919Sothen, those who suffer according to Gods will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.
Most Important PrincipleDiscussion DIALOG Decision
Group Discussion• What have you realized today about unresolved conflicts?• How is this helpful to you now or in the future?• As you recall what we have studied in this course, what has been the most helpful? Why?