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Optimaza House Seo En

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House M.D. and SEO

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Optimaza House Seo En

  1. 1. All SEO specialists lie.
  2. 2. All SEO specialists promise to elevate your website to the top positions in Yandex and Google search result lists, fast and cheaply. It’s clear to me they are lying. What can you say about it?
  3. 3. Stop making eyes at our viewers! They won’t help you! Answer in turn.
  4. 4. I think SEOs don’t lie. I think one can increase website traffic fast and cheaply!
  5. 5. This is obviously a blonde speaking! You’re fired!
  6. 6. Please don’t fire me, House! Look what I can do!!
  7. 7. I can do this, and that, and that too…
  8. 8. Cameron! Read my lips! You’re F-I-R-E-D! Go to the Emergency Room and help the victims of “black” SEO specialists!
  9. 9. Who’s Next?!
  10. 10. House is always right! It’s just that SEOs are great guys and each of them deserves a chance! Even if this means that the clients’ money will go down the drain…
  11. 11. I’ve always known you’re a brownnoser. But I’ve never suspected you’re an idiot! You’re fired!
  12. 12. • Cuddy, these idiots are driving me crazy! • Hang in there, House! You have only one person left on your team, an African-American. Don’t fire him, you know who our President is now…
  13. 13. I hate “black” SEOs! They start with petty thefts and carjacking and end up “optimizing” the websites of trusting white folk! Real optimization means web analytics, setting up partnership programs, improving website usability and increasing sales as a result!
  14. 14. ОК! You stay on the team! But we need to find a replacement now…
  15. 15. Hey, what the hell is this? Who’s writing the script?? It’s not House who needs replacement, it’s the Australian and the softhearted blonde! Hugh Laurie will continue as House!
  16. 16. Hello, my name is David Shore, I’m a writer of House M.D. I’ve always been against slashing the show’s budget and adding a cross-eyed girl, a short guy and a national minority representative to the cast. I even went on strike to protest against this (remember how the previous season was cut short!) I think we must fire the girl at least, she’s too expensive!
  17. 17. Don’t worry guys, Olivia will continue as Thirteen. David Shore will never bother us again. Never ever…
  18. 18. ОК, guys. Let’s return to our muttons… While we were reducing the show’s optimization budgets, we suffered some losses. The first clients of “black” optimizers are going out of business…
  19. 19. What should we prescribe our clients so they can use their website to raise sales?
  20. 20. I know! First, we should analyze the buying cycle of the product or service and the website visitors!
  21. 21. Voiceover: Why didn’t you say before that you had such a swimsuit?? I would have agreed to sleep with you… It’s a good idea! Go on!
  22. 22. We should also make the website visitor- friendly. When 99% of visitors leave the site it means that nobody thinks about the patient, that is, the visitor!
  23. 23. Voiceover: Oh God, she’s so plain. Why do these writers want me to pretend I care about her?? All right, I already tore Shore’s heart out! It’s a good idea! Go on!
  24. 24. And we must develop partnership programs to stop being dependent on search engine results!
  25. 25. Voiceover: Baby! We’re keeping you on the show anyway (after seeing your pics in your underwear) Thirteen! You talk sense when you don’t sleep with Foreman!
  26. 26. Voiceover: I wonder if the writers will ever put one good idea into Wilson’s head! Hey, you! What do YOU think we must do to increase sales online?
  27. 27. Oh my God, what do I say to him? Those idiot writers didn’t say anything about SEO! And House will make a laughing stock out of me!
  28. 28. House, I think we should also work on website content so that search engine robots can find all the necessary info!
  29. 29. The answer is right! But this is the wrong man! I’m scared! I don’t know who to blame – the writers or Wilson himself. Good-bye, loser!
  30. 30. Honey, I’m coming to you! I’ll pick up your mug… See, it’s so bad when you don’t know the first thing about SEO!
  31. 31. Let’s sum it up! To use the Internet to increase sales, one should: 1) Constantly improve website visibility to search engine robots. This should be done regularly and insightfully, while most SEO specialists just scratch the surface now and then.
  32. 32. 2) Keep on making the website more user- friendly. 3) Constantly improve the site’s textual content. You can make visitors choose your product or place it on their short list just after they read your product description.
  33. 33. 4) Constantly analyze all (!) of the Internet users’ inquiries related directly or indirectly (!) to your product. And tailor the site to potential buyers’ demands rather than make them buy what you have in stock.
  34. 34. 5) Always look out for websites that are similar to yours in terms of subject matter and direction and to set up partnership programs with them that will bring in buyers
  35. 35. You can do all that yourself or hire at least four expensive Internet specialists. But there’s a better option: contact Optimaza, the creator of Natural Optimization product.
  36. 36. Natural Optimization helps you use your website to increase sales. You can find out more at http://optimaza.com/ or send a letter (make a call) to the guys at Optimaza: Mikhail Voznyuk, +380 (68) 351-09-78, m.voznyuk@optimaza.com Valentin Pertsiya, +380 (67) 220-20-67, v.pertsiya@optimaza.com
  37. 37. Guys from Optimaza lie like everyone else. But only about their diagnoses! You can trust what they say about the Internet! Optimaza will help you use your website to increase sales!

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