The Story Of Little Red Riding Hood, Fractured Fairytale
The Story of Little Red Riding
Once upon a time, a beautiful little gir....
" Okay okay! No! Stop right there! The names Jack, and I'LL
read this story in MY way!
So it was back in the day, let's see, 1957 when I was on my
way to Fey's house to fix her uh, whatchamacallit, and I was
interrupted by a wolf near the woods. I was walking along,
then a wolf suddenly popped up and out of the bush. Now he
didn't notice me so he crept along the dark brown,rocky path.
It seems as though he too was going to Fey's house.As I know,
Fey is DEATHLY afraid of wolves. I went further down the
path when the wolf disappeared. I think because he saw me or
heard me or somthin' like that.Time went by and soon enough,
I appeared at the gas station near Fey's place.I went in to
get my usual coke, when I saw something that reminded me of
the wolf from earlier. It was a WANTED sign. I guess that ol'
troublemaker was doin' some dirty deeds. It said that he had
pretended to be someones mom, while the real mom was in the
closet, and faked the son out, then, unfortunately, ate him. I
told the clerk that I had seen him while on my way to Fey's.I
said that he loked like he was going to Fey's too.
Just then, it hit me. It was all coming together. the reason he
was going to Fey's was because he too was gonna stuff he in a
closet and eat her kids. But why? She didn't have any kids?
She has grandkids but that's all. Well now I was confused. So I
decided to head back to Fey's as soon as possible to see what
he was up to.
I arrived sooner that later and looked at the house. Nothing
was wrong. No one had broke in or anything. Was I wrong about
him? Maybe he was just taking a stroll and it happened to be
where I was too. Just then, I heard a scream coming from the
house! I budged the door open and as I suspected, the wolf was
dressed up like Fey. To my surprise, Fey's Grandaughter Little
Red, was there. Ohhh so that's why the wolf came! He knew
that Little Red was comin'.Unfortunately, all that thinking was
delaying me from stopping the wolf so I She didn't even know it
was the dumb wolf! I could tell that she was under his spell. He
was saying his usual, which was, "Better to smell you with" and
"Better to see you with" and "Better to eat you with!" So I
jumped in between them and stopped the wolf. I saved the day,
Little Red Riding Hood, and Fey. I did have some external
injuries and as for the wolf, well, he was sent to the Zoo for
the Insane, after he came back jail of course. Well I hope
you've enjoyed the REAL story, instead of that dumb "Once
upon a time" bogus.Well now, I actually have to fix Fey's
whatchimacalit like I was supposed to at the beginning!! Well