With Humor 14
Will/going to - 2
The Past Perfect
Complete the jokes by putting these words or phrases in
the gaps provided:
1 Waiter, will my pizza be ………?
> No, I expect it will be round as usual.
2 Tomorrow my name will be up in lights in every cinema
in the country.
> How are you going to do that?
Easy. I’m changing my name to ……………………
3 Two fish were swimming together in a river.
> Look, said the first one. It’s starting to rain.
Quick. Let’s swim under the bridge, said the second fish, or
we’ll get ………..
4 Do you think I’ll lose my …………. as I get older?
> If you’re lucky!
5 The world will never come to an end.
Because it is …………., stupid!
6 You’re ugly.
And you’re drunk.
Yes, but in the morning, I’ll be ………………
7 The television will never replace the newspaper?
Because you can’t swat a ……… with a television.
8 I think I’m going to lose my job in the flower shop
> What for?
I sent flowers to a ………… with the wrong card on them.
> What did the card say?
HOPE YOU’LL BE HAPPY IN YOUR NEW HOME.
9 I know what you’re going to do tonight.
> All right then. What am I going to do?
You’re going to …………., of course!
10 Doctor, help me. My heart is beating very quickly and I
feel terrible. I think I’m going to …………..
> Nonsense. That’s the last thing you’ll do.
1 long 2 Emergency Exit 3 wet 4 looks
6 sober 7 fly 8 funeral 9 sleep 10
* When the mind lacks attention and concentration,
one can do the most stupid of things.
* Unmindfulness can cause much hardship and
suffering to oneself and others.