Interpersonal Managing Conflict


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Interpersonal Managing Conflict

  1. 1. Interpersonal Managing Conflict
  2. 2. Conflict Conflict exists when individuals who depend on each other express different views, interests, or goals and perceive their views as incompatible or oppositional.
  3. 3. Conflict is <ul><li>Natural </li></ul><ul><li>Inevitable </li></ul><ul><li>Potentially constructive </li></ul>
  4. 4. Types of Conflict <ul><li>Pseudo – apparent, not real, a conflict waiting to happen </li></ul><ul><li>Fact – concerns message accuracy </li></ul><ul><li>Value - deep-seated beliefs about what is good or bad, worthwhile or worthless, desirable or undesirable, moral or immoral </li></ul><ul><li>Policy – what should be the plan, course of action, or behavior </li></ul><ul><li>Ego – “winning” or “losing” is central to maintaining self-image </li></ul>
  5. 5. Types of Conflict <ul><li>Pseudo </li></ul><ul><li>Fact </li></ul><ul><li>Value </li></ul><ul><li>Policy </li></ul><ul><li>Ego </li></ul>Conflicts become complicated when they escalate to involve values and egos.
  6. 6. Styles of Conflict Management <ul><li>Withdrawal – people physically or psychologically remove themselves from the conflict </li></ul><ul><li>Accommodating – people attempt to satisfy others’ needs while neglecting their own </li></ul><ul><li>Forcing – people attempt to satisfy their own needs without concern for the other or harm done to the relationship </li></ul>
  7. 7. Styles of Conflict Management (continued) <ul><li>Compromising – people attempt to resolve conflict by providing some satisfaction for both parties </li></ul><ul><li>Collaborating – people try to fully address the needs and issues of each party and arrive at a solution that is mutually satisfying </li></ul>
  8. 8. Conflict Styles High concern for self High concern for other Accommodating Collaborating Compromising Withdrawing Forcing
  9. 9. Collaborative Conflict Management <ul><li>Define the problem. </li></ul><ul><li>Analyze the problem. </li></ul><ul><li>Develop criteria for judging solutions. </li></ul><ul><li>Generate solution alternatives. </li></ul><ul><li>Select the solution that best meets the criteria identified. </li></ul>
  10. 10. Approaches to Conflict Both parties feel satisfied Win/Win Neither party gets satisfaction Lose/Lose The other party gets satisfaction Lose/Win One party gets satisfaction Win/Lose
  11. 11. Initiating Conflict Using Communication Skills <ul><li>Recognize and state ownership of the problem. </li></ul><ul><li>Describe the basis of the potential conflict in terms of behavior, consequences, and feelings. </li></ul><ul><li>Avoid evaluating the other person’s motives. </li></ul><ul><li>Be sure the other person understands your problem. </li></ul><ul><li>Think of exactly what you will say before you confront the other person. </li></ul><ul><li>Phrase your request in a way that focuses on common ground. </li></ul>
  12. 12. Responding to Conflict Using Communication Skills <ul><li>Put up mental shields against overly aggressive attacks, rather than becoming defensive or counterattacking. </li></ul><ul><li>Respond with genuine interest and concern. </li></ul><ul><li>Paraphrase your understanding of the problem. </li></ul><ul><li>Seek common ground. </li></ul><ul><li>Ask the initiator to suggest alternatives. </li></ul>
  13. 13. Constructive Communication Unproductive Communication <ul><li>Validation of each other </li></ul><ul><li>Disconfirmation of each other </li></ul><ul><li>Sensitive listening </li></ul><ul><li>Poor listening </li></ul><ul><li>Dual Perspective </li></ul><ul><li>Preoccupation with self </li></ul><ul><li>Recognize other’s </li></ul><ul><li>concerns </li></ul><ul><li>Cross-complaining </li></ul><ul><li>Hostile mind reading </li></ul><ul><li>Seek Clarification </li></ul>
  14. 14. Constructive Communication Unproductive Communication <ul><li>Focus on specific issues </li></ul><ul><li>Everything is thrown in </li></ul><ul><li>Compromises and contracts </li></ul><ul><li>Counterproposals </li></ul><ul><li>Useful metacommunication </li></ul><ul><li>Excessive </li></ul><ul><li>metacommunication </li></ul><ul><li>Summarizing the </li></ul><ul><li>concerns for both </li></ul><ul><li>partners </li></ul><ul><ul><ul><ul><ul><li>Self-summarizing </li></ul></ul></ul></ul></ul>(continued) <ul><li>Infrequent interruptions </li></ul><ul><li>Frequent interruptions </li></ul>
  15. 15. Mediator An uninvolved third party who serves as a neutral and impartial guide, structuring an interaction that enables the conflicting parties to find a mutually acceptable solution to their problems.
  16. 16. Mediating Conflict Using Communication Skills <ul><li>The people need to agree to work with you. </li></ul><ul><li>Help the people identify the real conflict. </li></ul><ul><li>Maintain your neutrality. </li></ul><ul><li>Keep the discussion focused on the issues. </li></ul><ul><li>Work to ensure equal air time. </li></ul><ul><li>Focus the discussion on solutions not blame. </li></ul><ul><li>Make sure both parties fully understand and support the agreed-upon solution. </li></ul><ul><li>Establish an action plan and follow-up. </li></ul>
  17. 17. Learn from Conflict Failures <ul><li>Analyzing your behavior will put you in a better position to act more successfully in the next conflict. </li></ul><ul><li>Since conflict is inevitable, you can count on using this knowledge again. </li></ul>
  18. 18. How We Manage Conflict Affects: <ul><li>Our friendships </li></ul><ul><li>Our romantic relationships </li></ul><ul><li>Our world of work </li></ul>