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Confidence, Credibility, and Conflict <br />Rob Buccino<br />Guest Presenter, Metro Mentoring Program<br />NeoCortex Consu...
Our interests<br />Their interests<br />When do we need confidence and credibility?In conflict<br />
Conflicts are everywhere<br />Getting heard<br />Getting respect<br />Asking for a raise<br />Selling<br />Dealing with yo...
How do we usually feelwhen facing conflicts?<br />
Fight<br />Flee<br />We have choices in how wedeal with our fear<br />Compromise<br />Co-creation<br />Freeze<br />
Our choices influence our confidence and credibility<br />Flee    Freeze    Fight   Compromise  Co-create<br />Less<br />M...
Why co-create?<br />Reduces fear and increases optimism<br />Addresses your interests AND theirs<br />Can increase the ove...
How to co-create<br />“Yes,but….”<br />“Yes, and….”<br />
Exercising co-creation: “A story that’s never been told”<br />Group picks a topic<br />Two volunteers<br />Each person say...
What obstacles block accepting another’s ideas?<br />How does it feel to have your ideas consistently accepted and built o...
Learning through listening is a keyto co-creation<br /><ul><li>Probe their interests
Declare your own
Create options for mutual gains</li></li></ul><li> Confirm understanding with ‘you-messages’<br /><ul><li>“Sounds like…”
“You’re feeling…”
“You’re thinking…”
“You’re concerned…”
“I see…”</li></ul>The essentials: “You” and “I”<br /> Declare your interests with‘I-messages’<br /><ul><li>“Hear me out…”
“I feel…”
“I’m thinking…”
“I’m concerned…”
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Confidence, Credibility, and Conflict

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Ideas on how to interact more credibly and confidently with co-workers, supervisors, vendors, and others by exploring interests and co-creating mutual gains solutions.

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Confidence, Credibility, and Conflict

  1. 1. Confidence, Credibility, and Conflict <br />Rob Buccino<br />Guest Presenter, Metro Mentoring Program<br />NeoCortex Consulting Group<br />
  2. 2. Our interests<br />Their interests<br />When do we need confidence and credibility?In conflict<br />
  3. 3. Conflicts are everywhere<br />Getting heard<br />Getting respect<br />Asking for a raise<br />Selling<br />Dealing with your kids<br />Getting promoted<br />Delegating<br />Setting priorities<br />Making group choices<br />
  4. 4. How do we usually feelwhen facing conflicts?<br />
  5. 5. Fight<br />Flee<br />We have choices in how wedeal with our fear<br />Compromise<br />Co-creation<br />Freeze<br />
  6. 6. Our choices influence our confidence and credibility<br />Flee Freeze Fight Compromise Co-create<br />Less<br />More<br />
  7. 7. Why co-create?<br />Reduces fear and increases optimism<br />Addresses your interests AND theirs<br />Can increase the overall ‘win’ (vs. compromise)<br />Increases understanding and empathy<br />
  8. 8. How to co-create<br />“Yes,but….”<br />“Yes, and….”<br />
  9. 9. Exercising co-creation: “A story that’s never been told”<br />Group picks a topic<br />Two volunteers<br />Each person says one sentence<br />Next person says, “Yes, and…” before continuing the story<br />Do NOT say, “Yes, but…” or just “Yes”<br />Continue until told to stop<br />
  10. 10. What obstacles block accepting another’s ideas?<br />How does it feel to have your ideas consistently accepted and built on?<br />In what ways could you use co-creation to build confidence and credibility in your work? <br />
  11. 11. Learning through listening is a keyto co-creation<br /><ul><li>Probe their interests
  12. 12. Declare your own
  13. 13. Create options for mutual gains</li></li></ul><li> Confirm understanding with ‘you-messages’<br /><ul><li>“Sounds like…”
  14. 14. “You’re feeling…”
  15. 15. “You’re thinking…”
  16. 16. “You’re concerned…”
  17. 17. “I see…”</li></ul>The essentials: “You” and “I”<br /> Declare your interests with‘I-messages’<br /><ul><li>“Hear me out…”
  18. 18. “I feel…”
  19. 19. “I’m thinking…”
  20. 20. “I’m concerned…”
  21. 21. “Do you see…”</li></li></ul><li>Scenario:the performance review<br />On a five-point scale, your boss gave you a “3” for “takes initiative”<br />You want your level of initiative to be given greater recognition<br />
  22. 22. Group exercise<br />Create a “you-message” that helps surface the boss’ interests<br />Create an “I-message” that helps you declare your interests<br />How would you go aboutco-creating mutual gains?<br />
  23. 23. Discussion<br />
  24. 24. One other thing to think about…<br />
  25. 25. Credibility thrives on accountability<br />Choose your commitments<br />Timelines & specifications<br />Not what you “can do,” but “will do”<br />
  26. 26. In conclusion:from conflict can come creativity, confidence, and credibility…<br />
  27. 27. Eleanor Roosevelt<br />"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you must stop and look fear in the face."  <br />
  28. 28. Hamilton Mabie<br />“Don't be afraid of opposition. Remember, a kite rises against, not with, the wind.”<br />
  • IbrahimMusa31

    Jun. 29, 2018

Ideas on how to interact more credibly and confidently with co-workers, supervisors, vendors, and others by exploring interests and co-creating mutual gains solutions.

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