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A change is in the wind (a climate change poem)


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A change is in the wind (a climate change poem)

  1. 1. A Change is in the Wind (A Climate Change Poem) by Neil Dufty
  2. 2. It is reported that ruminants, including cows, are directly responsible for 6.3% of anthropogenic global warming. Here’s their response using some ideas from the Dana Lyons’s song ‘Cows with Guns’
  3. 3. A Change is in the Wind Belch! They’re watching us, these things called humans Pens out, monitoring our rumens Cows no fun Pointing their fingers, shuffling their sheets Murmuring about the planet’s heat Cows help sun Worried faces, showing their petulance About our burps and our flatulence Cows need bung Uttering words, most common ‘methane’ Hoping cows would kindly refrain Cow’s bad bum
  4. 4. A Change is in the Wind (cont’d) With a gut like a still, our only torment Grass sloshes around, slow ferment Cow’s big drum Big cows with balls are the worst offenders Blame males, that’ll help defend us Cows well hung They think it’s best to fit us with gas masks Give us new grass to stop the farts Cow’s new tum They’ll want us to dispose of our very own cow pats Placing them into underground vats Cows no dung
  5. 5. A Change is in the Wind (cont’d) See they carve us up or milk us bone dry Now they say we make all things fry Cows hard done And we’re so over all their bovine jokes Go away, pick on some ‘udder’ folk Cow bad pun And don’t they belch things out, that’s a fact What’s spewing from that factory stack? Cows not dumb See all we want to do is chew our cud Moo, poo, trudge though the mud Cows hum drum
  6. 6. A Change is in the Wind (cont’d) So it’s over, all of this crap is enough We’re taking a stand, getting so tough Cows done fun Let’s fight for ruminant freedom Run with the buffalo, the sheep Let’s herd together, fight to the end Cows are one Let’s stampede the Golden Arches Go on long protest marches Fight on beaches and on pastures Even take to air in the fastest Cow Top Gun
  7. 7. A Change is in the Wind (cont’d) And now the end is very near The day that all of us cattle fear The last to the abattoir is to be tanned Our fight was called ‘Muster’s Last Stand’ Cows out gunned So if this story shocks, scares and amazes That we Daisies could be ‘pushing up daisies’ Next time you question our windy emissions Consider the risk of milk and meat omissions Cow’s life done © Neil Dufty
  8. 8. For more of Neil Dufty’s poems eil-Dufty/e/B00580K8VI