Emotion first, problem second


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A talk for Emergency Response Crew and Volunteers at Pakistan International Airline, conducted Feb-24-2014.

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Emotion first, problem second

  1. 1. Problem Solving with People in Trauma: Emotions First, Problems Second
  2. 2. Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved   Passion   Cer>fica>on   Educa>on   Rahila  Narejo  
  3. 3. 1.  Understanding  the  Emotional  Reaction  in   Trauma   2.  Your  Role  in  Special  Assistance   3.  Communicating  in  Crisis     4.  Problem  Solving  in  Crisis:  Apply  HEAT  
  4. 4. S-­‐P-­‐O-­‐T   S-­‐P-­‐O-­‐T   S-­‐P-­‐O-­‐T   Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  5. 5. 1.  5  _________  channel  information  to  your  brain.   2.  The  information  first  goes  to  the  _____________  ,   then  the  _______________.   3.  We  _______    before  we  ________.  
  6. 6. + 1,000 40 1,000 30 1,000 20 1,000 10
  7. 7. + 1,000 40 1,000 30 1,000 20 1,000 10 4,100
  8. 8. “NT”?  
  9. 9. JOSH PEAKS, Slows down Rational Behavior HOSH
  10. 10. Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  11. 11. Traumatic  Stress   ¡    the  emotional,  cognitive,  behavioral   and  physiological  experiences  of   individuals  who  are  exposed  to,  or  who   witness,  events  that  overwhelm  their   coping  and  problem  solving  abilities   (Lerner & Shelton, 2001)
  12. 12. Full  Scale   Hijacking   Third  Trigger   Toxicity Second   Trigger   First  Trigger   Time
  13. 13. ¡  Trauma  victims  are  hindered  in  their   ability  to:     §  think     §  learn  tasks  that  promote  reparation     §  develop  positive  responses  to  challenging   situations  
  14. 14. Acute Traumatic Stress Management Crisis Strikes Pre-event planning Crisis Response During The Critical Event Typical Crisis Response Plans Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved   Let-down Re-entry Phase Phase
  15. 15. Special Assistance Team Support • Emotional • Physical
  16. 16. Emotional Support •  Listening •  Providing First Hand and Credible Information •  Consoling
  17. 17. Remember  that  listening  helps   the  other  person  feel  heard,   understood,  important,  valued,   respected  and  cared  about.     Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  18. 18. One Word Can Make a BIG Difference Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  19. 19. I Messages Examples of "You" Messages 1. You aren't making any sense. Examples of "I" Messages 1. I couldn't understand what you said. 2. You won't be able to get the information. 2. I would like to help you get the information. 3. You shouldn’t be upset. 3. I understand that you are upset. Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  20. 20. I Messages "You" messages tend to: "I" messages tend to: ·Place blame. Puts people down ·Clarify your position, feelings, or opinions. ·Alienate, anger, make others defensive ·Build trust. Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  21. 21. Just One Change… Replace  You-­‐messages   with  I-­‐messages.   Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved  
  22. 22. “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Copyright  NarejoHR  (Pvt.)  Ltd.  All  Rights  Reserved   Maya Angelou quotes (American Poet b.1928)
  23. 23. ¡  Generally,  in  communicating  with  an   angry  or  upset  person,  try  to  be  more  of  a   LISTENER  than  a  TALKER.     ¡  Deal  with  the  EMOTION  first,  then  the   PROBLEM.  
  24. 24. Slow down Trigger Rational Behavior
  25. 25. Apply  some  HEAT!!!   A specialized form of Active Listening. •  H •  E •  A T •  Hear them out Empathize Ask/Answer questionsà YES! Tell and take responsibility
  26. 26. Slow down Supportive Comments Active Listening Paraphrase in the form of questions Rational Behavior Problem Solve
  27. 27. Inappropriate  “E”  Responses   •  Accidents are not planned •  We always had a good safety record •  It was better for them this way •  It could have been worse… •  At least only 5 people died •  All things happens for a reason… •  It was their destiny •  They are sitting right beside God enjoying paradise
  28. 28. Effective  “E”  Responses   •  I am truly sorry for your loss. •  I regret the difficulty this has caused. •  I am here to assist you in any way possible.
  29. 29. Responder  Tips   ¡  Drink  plenty  of  water  and  eat  healthy  snacks     ¡  Take  frequent,  brief  breaks  from  the  scene  as   practicable     ¡  Talk  about  their  emotions  to  process  what  they   have  seen  and  done   ¡  Stay  in  touch  with  family  and  friends   ¡  Pair  up  with  another  responder  to  monitor  one   another’s  stress  
  30. 30. Last words APPLIED Knowledge is… POWER
  31. 31. All the Success!