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You’re Going to be
“Off Track” 90% of
the Time. So What?
Good families – even great families – are off track 90% of the time.
The key is that they have a sense of destination. They know what the
 “track” looks like. And they keep coming back to it time and time
                                again.
The key is in having a
                   destination, a flight plan, and a
                              compass.




Invest the next few minutes in this presentation, and you
 will be given the most valuable tools ever to find your
               destination for your family.
Have the end in mind:
A Beautiful Family Culture
HABIT 1




BE PROACTIVE
We do not
have to love.
We choose
  to love.
To do carefully and constantly and kindly
  many little things is not a little thing.
The way you treat any
relationship in the family
     will eventually affect
 every relationship in the
                   family.
HABIT 2




BEGIN WITH THE
 END IN MIND
Create a
   clear,
 compelling
  vision of
  what you
  and your
family are all
   about.
A family mission statement is a
combined, unified expression
from all family members of what
your family is all about and the
principles you choose to govern
your family life.
For the most part, families don’t
have the kind of mission statement
so critical to organizational success.
Yet the family is the
most important,
fundamental
organization in
the world.
Through a family
mission statement you
can let your children
know that you
are totally
committed
to them, and
that you have
been from the very
moment of their
birth or adoption.
HABIT 3




PUT FIRST THINGS
     FIRST
Making Family a Priority in a
     Turbulent World
“Okay, now, I know what you’re going
 to hear from people is “We don’t have the time. But
  if you don’t have the time for one night or at least
    one hour during the week where everybody can
come together as a family, then the family is       not
                     the priority.”
                          ~ Oprah Winfrey ~
Things which matter the most must
 never be at the mercy of things
        which matter least.
The place to start is not with
the assumption that work is
non-negotiable; it’s with the
assumption that family is non-
negotiable. That one shift of
mind-set opens the
door to all kinds of
creative possibilities.
The role of
     parents is a
    unique one, a
        sacred
   stewardship in
life. Is there really
    anything that
  would outweigh
the importance of
    fulfilling that
stewardship well?
HABIT 4




THINK “WIN~WIN”
Moving
 from
“Me”
  to
 “We”
The question is
this: “Would you
   be willing to
   search for a
 solution that is
better than what
  either of us is
now proposing?”
The commitment is this:
 “Let me listen to you
  first” or “Help me
     understand.”
The principle is
  this: What is
  important to
 another person
    must be as
important to you
   as the other
 person is to you.
Parenting is not about being popular and giving
 in to every child’s whim and desire. It’s about
making decisions that truly are win-win
– however they may appear to the child
                   at the time.
HABIT 5



  SEEK FIRST TO
UNDERSTAND…THEN
TO BE UNDERSTOOD
Solving family problems
      through emphatic
        communication
There’s no way to have rich, rewarding
   family relationships without real
            understanding
Most mistakes with family
members are not the result
of bad intent. It’s just that
           we really don’t
           understand. We
           don’t see clearly
           into one
           another’s hearts.
When you understand…




You don’t judge.
Each person
needs to be loved
in his or her own
special way. They
  key to making
     deposits,
  therefore, is to
understand – and
 to speak – that
person’s language
      of love
The technique of emphatic listening is just the
tip of the iceberg. The great mass of the iceberg
is a deep and sincere desire to truly understand.
HABIT 6




SYNERGIZE
Building family unity through
   celebrating differences
You must be able to say sincerely, “The
 fact that we see things differently is a
   strength – not a weakness – in our
              relationship.
Once you
realize that each
    problem is
   asking for a
response instead
      of just
   triggering a
  reaction, you
 start to learn.
 You become a
learning family.
HABIT 7




SHARPEN THE SAW
Renewing
the family
  spirit
 through
traditions
Every family must take time to renew itself
   in the four key areas of life: physical,
        social, mental, and spiritual.
If you organize
                      your family life to
                      spend ten or
                      fifteen minutes a
                      morning reading
                      something that
connects you to timeless principles, you
will make better choices during the day
– in the family, on the job, in every
dimension of life.
Sharpening the saw is the highest leverage activity in
 life because it affects everything else so powerfully
From Survival…To stability…To Success…To Significance




 I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know:
 The only ones among you who will really be happy are those
who have sought and found how to serve. ~ Albert Schweitzer ~
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
     & CREDITS


 The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families
                    by
            Stephen R. Covey
                   1998
   Simon & Schuster UK Ltd. (London)
Seven habits of highly effective families

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Seven habits of highly effective families

  • 1.
  • 2. You’re Going to be “Off Track” 90% of the Time. So What?
  • 3. Good families – even great families – are off track 90% of the time. The key is that they have a sense of destination. They know what the “track” looks like. And they keep coming back to it time and time again.
  • 4. The key is in having a destination, a flight plan, and a compass. Invest the next few minutes in this presentation, and you will be given the most valuable tools ever to find your destination for your family.
  • 5. Have the end in mind: A Beautiful Family Culture
  • 7.
  • 8. We do not have to love. We choose to love.
  • 9. To do carefully and constantly and kindly many little things is not a little thing.
  • 10. The way you treat any relationship in the family will eventually affect every relationship in the family.
  • 11. HABIT 2 BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND
  • 12. Create a clear, compelling vision of what you and your family are all about.
  • 13. A family mission statement is a combined, unified expression from all family members of what your family is all about and the principles you choose to govern your family life.
  • 14. For the most part, families don’t have the kind of mission statement so critical to organizational success. Yet the family is the most important, fundamental organization in the world.
  • 15. Through a family mission statement you can let your children know that you are totally committed to them, and that you have been from the very moment of their birth or adoption.
  • 16. HABIT 3 PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST
  • 17. Making Family a Priority in a Turbulent World
  • 18. “Okay, now, I know what you’re going to hear from people is “We don’t have the time. But if you don’t have the time for one night or at least one hour during the week where everybody can come together as a family, then the family is not the priority.” ~ Oprah Winfrey ~
  • 19. Things which matter the most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.
  • 20. The place to start is not with the assumption that work is non-negotiable; it’s with the assumption that family is non- negotiable. That one shift of mind-set opens the door to all kinds of creative possibilities.
  • 21. The role of parents is a unique one, a sacred stewardship in life. Is there really anything that would outweigh the importance of fulfilling that stewardship well?
  • 23. Moving from “Me” to “We”
  • 24. The question is this: “Would you be willing to search for a solution that is better than what either of us is now proposing?”
  • 25. The commitment is this: “Let me listen to you first” or “Help me understand.”
  • 26. The principle is this: What is important to another person must be as important to you as the other person is to you.
  • 27. Parenting is not about being popular and giving in to every child’s whim and desire. It’s about making decisions that truly are win-win – however they may appear to the child at the time.
  • 28. HABIT 5 SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND…THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD
  • 29. Solving family problems through emphatic communication
  • 30.
  • 31. There’s no way to have rich, rewarding family relationships without real understanding
  • 32. Most mistakes with family members are not the result of bad intent. It’s just that we really don’t understand. We don’t see clearly into one another’s hearts.
  • 33. When you understand… You don’t judge.
  • 34. Each person needs to be loved in his or her own special way. They key to making deposits, therefore, is to understand – and to speak – that person’s language of love
  • 35. The technique of emphatic listening is just the tip of the iceberg. The great mass of the iceberg is a deep and sincere desire to truly understand.
  • 37. Building family unity through celebrating differences
  • 38. You must be able to say sincerely, “The fact that we see things differently is a strength – not a weakness – in our relationship.
  • 39. Once you realize that each problem is asking for a response instead of just triggering a reaction, you start to learn. You become a learning family.
  • 41. Renewing the family spirit through traditions
  • 42. Every family must take time to renew itself in the four key areas of life: physical, social, mental, and spiritual.
  • 43. If you organize your family life to spend ten or fifteen minutes a morning reading something that connects you to timeless principles, you will make better choices during the day – in the family, on the job, in every dimension of life.
  • 44. Sharpening the saw is the highest leverage activity in life because it affects everything else so powerfully
  • 45. From Survival…To stability…To Success…To Significance I don’t know what your destiny will be, but one thing I know: The only ones among you who will really be happy are those who have sought and found how to serve. ~ Albert Schweitzer ~
  • 46. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS & CREDITS The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen R. Covey 1998 Simon & Schuster UK Ltd. (London)