Issue 11

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Issue 11

  1. 1. JUNE 1999 ISSUE: 11 VOL. 1
  2. 2. OUR STAFF PUBLISHER..................................................ED BURTON PRESIDENT..................................................ED BURTON VICE PRESIDENT..........................................ED BURTON PHOTOGRAPHY.............................................ED BURTON REPORTER....................................................ED BURTON WRITER.......................................................ED BURTON GRAPHICS....................................................ED BURTON SECURITY....................................................ED BURTON ANIMAL TRAINER........................................ED BURTON SPECIAL EFFECTS.........................................ED BURTON PROMOTIONS...............................................ED BURTON KING..........................................................ED BURTON KEY GRIP....................................................ED BURTON ASSISTANT TO MR. BURTON..........................ED BURTON SCOUT.........................................................ED BURTON MOST LIKELY TO GET SUED...........................ED BURTON CAPTAIN OF THE USS ENTERPRISE........................................JAMES T. KIRK LEADER OF THE AUTOBOTS..........................................OPTIMUS PRIME THE PLACE FOR SMILES..............................EAT’n’PARK Thanks to Aaron Steckleberg who has contributed many graphics as well as other art over the weeks. He now lives around the corner from hookers in another state. Sorry this took so long to get out. That apology goes to everyone. I've been slackin’, I'm allowed, so fuck off. Copyright 1999 The Door From Hell All Rights Reserved. Some photos have been taken from other places, and are copyrighted by the places they were stolen from.
  3. 3. TABLE OF CONTENTS 1...........................................People in Charge of Something 2....................................................................Table of Contents 3....................................................................The Shaft Page 4..........................From the “Where are they Now Files?” PART II 5...........................................................Summer Blockbusters 6.............................................................................Why 2k? 7/8.......................................................... ...............Centerfold 9.........................................................................SkyCar 10................................................Letters from those who can read. 11................................................................White Trash 12..........................................................Film Festival 13..........................................................Capo Crunch 14.....................................................The Last Page HEY! From here on in, if you want to continue getting this fine publication, you’re gonna have to send me stamps. Send as many stamps for as many issues you want. So like, if you send 3 stamps, I’ll send you 3 issues. Thanks. (those that have sent stamps already, I’M KEEPING TRACK!
  4. 4. THE PAGE Sean Michaels is the most successful such hardcore interracial on their black man in porno history, a hard audiences. (There's supposedly a classic working stud who has parlayed a tireless Sean/Ashlyn production schedule into one of the Gere tryst lying on someone's editing longest-running carnal careers of any room floor, for instance.) African-American performer He's a Sean moved behind the camera in well-muscled stud with a sly grin that 1993 to helm the "Sean Michaels On lets audiences The Road" series, know that he's and he showed a quite aware of great eye and a just how good knack for bringing he's got it. Sean's the best out of his boyish good performers. Since looks have then, Sean's efforts proven to be as a producer and irresistible to director have kept porno starlets for him at the forefront almost a decade of black-themed now, and there's and interracial no reason to sexvids. His "Up suspect that he's Your Ass" flicks planning to slow are some of the down anytime hottest anal-themed soon. flicks on the Sean was born market, while his Andre Allen in directing in Brooklyn, New features like "In York. He moved Loving Color #01" out West in 1989 and "Mac'in #01 determined to & 02" has lifted the break into the porno racket, but little bar for black-centered productions. did he know what an impact he'd end The star of over 700 hardcore features up making. Sean's stellar woodsmanship and one of the most talented directors got him noticed almost immediately, in the biz, Sean Michaels is deservedly while his the most famous black stud to ever above-average acting skills enabled him appear in porn. He's a member of the to land roles that hadn't AVN Hall of Fame and a two-time previously gone to black actors. He has winner of the Fans Of X-Rated run into racism in the industry, though, Entertainment Male Favorite Award with many white actresses refusing to (1996 & 1997). work with him. Sean's also been edited out of several vids by squeamish directors who were afraid to unleash
  5. 5. FROMTHE “WHEREARETHEYNOW?”FILES TIFFANY BRISSETTE (b. 1974) Former occupation: Robot girl Vicki Lawson on terribly weird 1985-89 sitcom, Small Wonder. Last seen: Reader b.dunn@pop.netaddress.com reports, " ...[Today] TIFFANY BRISSETTE looks like a younger and pretty LEAH REMINI and wears dark amber sunglasses most of the time ... She horsebacks in the mountains and has a nice ocean-view flat ... She's working for a teaching license in drama and sings at congregations like ROBERT SCHULLER's. She does voices for cartoons and coaches at local playhouses. ... The chick's a real seafood addict and puts away a bucket of shrimp, oysters and scallops at one shot -- and it doesn't show one gram on her fabulous frame." For more robot girl fun, check out Memories of TIFFANY BRISSETTE and The Unofficial Small Wonder Home Page. BUTCH PATRICK (b. 1953) Former occupations: Curling up with doll Woof Woof as pointy-eared, pint-sized ghoul Eddie Munster on The Munsters (1964-66); starring as Mark, the boy stranded in the land of hats, on trippy Sid & Marty Krofft kids show, Lidsville (1971-73). Last seen: Recording the single, "Whatever Happened to Eddie?" (1983); living with his family in St. Petersburg, Florida; keeping The Munsters flame alive, via his official Website. DANNY PINTAURO (b. 1976) Former occupation: Playing preppy kid Jonathan Bower on Who’s the Boss? Last seen: Pintauro, who made tabloid headlines by declaring Ellen-style, "Yup, I'm gay," is a 1998 graduate of Stanford University, where he directed student theater. One production, Shakespeare's Sonnets, is available on video through the Stanford Channel. Do a program search for 1998 Original Winter One Acts. For lots o' Danny info, check out the DANIEL PINTAURO FAQ. http://members.tripod.com/~former_child_star/index.html
  6. 6. SUMMERMOVIES With the summer comes a slieu of new blockbuster movies. So here are just a few of the, no doubt, classics to be, that we have to look forward to in the coming months. Left: A scene from the new jAdam Sandler movie, Big Daddy, where Sandler baby sits a bunch of rowdy kids, who lead him on a crazy adventure where they run into some bad guy, and get rescued by a big tow truck driver named Thor. Right: Tom Cruise, and Nicole Kidman (shown here) are back in the final movie of Stan Kubrick’s career, and life. Better crank up the AC, because Eyes Wide Shut looks to be one of this summer’s HOTTEST! Left: And we can’t forget the love story. In this latest “chick flick” the main character claims he will never get married, but falls hopelessly in love with an old flame. The Ideal Husband opens in July.
  7. 7. WHY 2K? Suits in Dispute president of the Business Software Alliance, recently said he knew of only Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) two. Congressional aides estimates that from 65 to 80 claim about a third of the 80 lawsuits related to Y2K have suits filed are believed to be been filed and fears the class actions. nation's courts will face a "tidal wave of litigation" Only one case has been next year because of certified as a national class electronic disruptions action, however. In May, caused when many software Sage Software Inc. of programs using two-digit California agreed to the date fields read "00" not as certification, which covers 2000 but as 1900. purchasers of an accounting software program sold from McCain, joined by Sens. 1990 through February 1998. Ron Wyden (D-Ore.) and Christopher J. Dodd (D- Versions of the software Conn.), is sponsoring cannot process dates after legislation, scheduled for Dec. 31, according to the law debate in the Senate today, firms that brought the suit. that would limit class action Sage Software general lawsuits and punitive counsel Matthew damages in the event Y2K Cavanaugh said the failures prevent companies company would not from fulfilling their contracts comment on matters under and providing required litigation. services or supplies. - The Washington Post But there appears to be no precise accounting of how many class action suits have been filed. Robert Holleyman,
  8. 8. www.moller.com Passengers: 4 Cruise Speed/ 350/390 Moller has developed, built, and flown a Top Speed mph two passenger prototype model of a volantor. This volantor is a new type of Max Rate of 7800 aircraft that combines the performance of climb fpm airplane and the VTOL capability of Max Range: 900 helicopters in a single vehicle without the miles limitations. Here’s some stats on the 4 Payload w/ 740 passenger model. max fuel lbs Fuel 15 • The rotapower engine is multi-fuel Consumption mpg capable. Engines are typically configured Operational 30,000 to run on unleaded gasoline. We have Ceiling ft recently demonstrated the engines ability 2400 to run on diesel to the Army and on Natural Gross Weight Gas to another organization. Lbs Engine Power 960 • A computer does the flying. The pilot (8x120hp) hp need only move the controls in the Dimensions direction he wants to go so that little skill 18’x9’x6’ (LxWxH) is required. Though it is easy to fly, the Takeoff and 35 ft operator will need to have a private pilot's landing area dia license until the ease of operation and Noise leveel at 65 safety are thoroughly demonstrated. 500 ft dba Vertical takeoff yes • In limited production (500 units per and landing year) the M400 Skycar will sell for a price Uses comparable to that of a four passenger yes high performance helicopter or airplane, automotive gas approximately $1 Million. As the volume Emergency yes parachutes of production increases substantially, its price can approach that of a luxury automobile.
  9. 9. LETTERS FROM OUR READERS Dear DFH: What can I say? Your publication makes me laugh, makes me cry, tugs at my heartstrings and slaps me silly. Maybe yunz wanna southern bureau? Dr. Serious Savannah, GA Good to hear from you Dr. S. keep in touch...and sure. you’ve just been elected by your superiors as the chief of the southern branch. Your new title is Dr. Serious: Yo-Yo In Charge of Southern Things...’n’at. Send comments to: doorfromhell@hotmail.com, or the address on the back.
  10. 10. Garbage Pail Kid of the Month Name: Nasty Nick Twin: Evil Eddie Number: 1a/1b (1st Series)
  11. 11. The CANS in FILM FESTIVAL Here are this year’s Nominees: (Send Votes to doorfromhell@hotmail.com) Jennifer Aniston Jenny McCarthy Jennifer Love Hewitt Pamela Anderson Lee Elizabeth Hurley Denise Richards
  12. 12. Talk like a capo (A-G) administration: the upper-level burn: to murder; synonyms: contract: a murder assignment. power structure of an organized break an egg, clip, do a piece of crime Family, composed of the work, hit, ice, pop, put out a Cosa Nostra: Italian for "this boss, underboss, and consigliere. contract on, whack. thing of ours," a mob family, the Mafia. associate: an almost-there; button: a "made" member of the someone who works with and Mafia; soldier, wiseguy, goodfella, crew: a group of soldiers that for wiseguys, but who hasn't Man of Honor. takes orders from a capo. been sworn in as a member of the Family. c a f o n e : a p h o n y o r cugine: a young toughguy embarrassment to himself and looking to be made. babania: Heroin, as in dealing. o t h e r s ; " g a v o n e " ( s l a n g Lucrative but risky for mob pronunciation) do a piece of work: to murder; insiders because if they're busted, see burn. long prison terms might compel capo: ranking member of a them to cut a deal and squeal. Family who heads a crew (or earner: someone whose expertise group) of soldiers; a skipper, short is making money for the Family. babbo: A dope, idiot, useless for capodecina. underling. empty suit: someone with Capo di tutti capi: see Boss of nothing to offer who tries to hang b e e f : a c o m p l a i n t o r Bosses around with mobsters. d i s a g re e m e n t w i t h i n t h e organization, usually discussed chased: to be banished from the enforcer: a person who threatens, during a sit-down with higher- M a f i a a n d b a r re d f ro m maims, or kills someone who ups in the Family. associating or doing business doesn't cooperate with Family with any made members. The rules or deals. big earner: someone who makes punishment is merciful in that a lot of money for the Family. A the offender is fence: someone with worldwide LOT of money. spared death. outlets to liquidate swag. books, the: euphemism for cleaning: taking the necessary friend of mine: introduction of membership in the Family, since steps (driving around, stopping a third person who is not a nothing is ever written down. in various locations) to avoid member of the Family but who When there is an availability being followed. can be vouched for by a Family (when someone dies), the books member. are "opened." When no one is clip: to murder; see burn being "made," the books are friend of ours: introduction of "closed." clock: to keep track of someone's one made member to another. movements and activities. borgata: a crime Family; brugad. gavone: see cafone. comare: a Mafia mistress; boss: the head of the crime "goumada" (slang pronunciation). get a place ready: To find a burial Family; he is the only one who site. gives permission to "whack" or come in: To go see the boss when "make" someone, and he makes summoned. gift: A bribe, sometimes for a m o n e y f ro m a l l F a m i l y juror. operations; synonyms: don, Commission, The: the Mafia chairman. "ruling body", typically a panel give a pass: To grant a reprieve made up of the bosses of the five from being whacked. Boss of Bosses; Capo di tutti New York Families, Gambino, capi: While no one proclaims Genovese, Lucchese, Colombo, going: About to be whacked. himself the Boss of Bosses and Bonanno sometimes with anymore, the press awards this representatives from other U.S. going south: stealing, passing title to whomever they feel is the Families, such as Chicago. money under the table, going on boss of the strongest of the five the lam. Families of New York, who is also compare: crony, close pal, buddy. said to preside over Commission Literally, "godfather" in Italian. goombah, goomba, gumba: meetings. Sicilian slang for the Italian consigliere: the counselor in a compare; plural: goombata broken: demoted in rank; crime Family; advises boss and "knocked down." handles disputes within the goumada: see comare. brugad: a crime family; borgata. ranks.
  13. 13. The Door From Hell 160 S. Fairmount St. Apt 8 Pittsburgh, PA 15206

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