Phineas Foog was considered a mystery. Nobody knew when or where
he found an ancient quarter that was worth 1,000,000 dollars. He had
just come up one day and cashed it in. The fortune he gained was worth
100,000 Pizzas. People often thought of him as a robot. He was never
late or early, but exactly on time. You could often ﬁnd him in his usual
spot on Mercury, the Charlie Chunk Club. That's where all the rich guys
went to hang out.
One day Foog's aquaintances met him at The Charlie Chunk Club to play
a high stakes game of Go Fish. While there his game mates made a
wierd comment about an alien that was stealing quarters not as valuable
as Phineas Foog's fortune but it could quickly amount if this continued. "I
wonder where in the solar system could he could be!" blasted Steve
Jones, Foog's adversary in this battle of luck. "Why he could be
anywhere," replied the museum curater that got one of his quarters
"He shan't escape the justice of the intergalactic police," Foog
exclaimed. "To prove it I shall travel to every planet in the galaxy and go
to the police. They will give me a badge saying that I have been to the
planet." I have a 500,000 dollar deposit in the bank." Phineas said. I shall
give you a check with my name on it. If I am not back here in 80
Lightyears you will be able to ﬁll it out and turn it in to the bank. "To prove
it, I shall travel to every planet in the galaxy and go to the police," said
Foog. They will give me a badge saying that I have been to the planet.
He set out from the Charlie Chunk Club at 7:00 on January 9, 6853. He
would start his journey with his servant Passport, whom he had hired the
They would have to go to Mercury, Uranus, Venus,
Earth, Neptune, Mars, Jupitar, and Saturn. They
would start at Mercury, Phineas's home, after
Mercury they go to Venus exactly how the solar
system goes. Mr. Foog's plan is to reach Neptune in
80 Lightyears. His plan was to depart from Mercury
at Sunday 8:56 1/9/6853. He would use a space train
to cross from his hometown Towntown to Mercury's
capital Mecury. His planned arrival is to reach
Mecury at Monday 8th, 4:32.
At the station Foog's aquaintances came to see him
off. Foog boarded the space train and made himself
comfortable. It was a 2 Lightyear trip to Mecury from
Towntown. He sat down and fell asleep. His only
pastime was playing Go Fish. He only left his car
when he needed to eat. Passport's favorite pastime
was talking to the other passengers. He loved to
hear their tales of where they were from.
At last the trip was over. Foog got out of the stuffy car. Passport was
glad to get out of there. Foog went straight to the police to get a badge.
When he got there he went to the desk clerk and demanded a badge
with the planet's name on it. "I'm sorry sir, but we can't give you a
badge." The clerk said. "Why not?" Foog questioned "For one you are
not qualiﬁed to have one." The clerk argued "But I am on a mission."
Foog explained. "Well if you put it that way, here you go." He handed
Foog the badge.
Meanwhile in Towntown there had been a robbery. The robber had
stolen the most expensive quarter yet. It had been worth 1,000,001
dollars. Luckily though, they had procured a description. It matched
Foog's description exactly. There had been some buzz before about his
mysterious disappearance, but know they all were saying that he had
left before he could be caught.
They then set out for Venus's capital Venu. They got on the best space
train in the universe the General Light. It would be a 7 Lightyear trip.
Foog told Passport get them some food before they entered the train.
When they entered the train they knew that they had made a smart
choice to get food for such a long journey, because the people who
work there do not offer any food.
Once they got there they immediately went to the police and
asked for a badge with the planet's name. This time though
the police didn't even question it. They just agreed with it.
Foog wondered why, but he didn't care because he thought
they might take it back. When leaving the police station, Foog
met an interesting fellow named Fix It Felix. He asked if he
could join them in their tour of the universe. Foog said,
Fix It Felix was secretly a spy sent to follow Foog. He
assumed that Foog was the robber and was hoping that he
could arrest him and get the reward. The reward was 500,000
dollars. He couldn't arrest him until he got back to Mercury
because that is the only planet in control of the very space
They then headed out for Earth. That is an 11 Lightyear trip.
They are going to Earth by a rocketship. They decided to get
some Go Fish cards to play. They played the whole time.
Foog won every time because he is a professional. He was
so into the game he almost missed the stop at earth's capital,
To go to Mars it would be 12 Lightyears. They would have to take
another rocket, but the ride would have the greatest danger yet
because they had to cross the Asteroid Belt. They just slept through all
12 Lightyears and had to be woken up when the train ride ended in
Mars's capital Mar. Then they went to the police and easily got the
badge with no questions asked because they knew about theirbet.
They then wanted to head out to Jupiter's capital, Jupite. It is an 8
Lightyear trip. They had to go by a Starship. The trip is dangerous
though so they had to help the captain. It was very hard to do this and
they got delayed because they found some aliens that captured a lady!
They had to save her. They told the captain that they wanted to take a
detour to save the woman. They offered 17,500 dollars to the driver and
the driver quickly accepted. They suited up with laser guns, jetpacks,
and space armor. They where ready for battle.
First Foog shot the aliens arms so the woman could escape and then
Passport quickly shot the aliens and then the aliens died. They quickly
went over to see if the woman was okay. She was pleased she was
saved and she praised them for there heroics and that they saved her.
She told them her name was EyeYoda and she had no house or home
because the alien came and destroyed her home and her husband.
Passport was heartbroken so he asked Foog if she could come along.
Foog accepted! They had a new aquantaince!
The trip to Saturn was on another space train. It will supposedly take
10 light years to get to the capital Saurn. On the train Foog and
Passport met a very skilled Go Fish player, Sir Francis Kronos-Party.
He will be traveling with them until Uranus. The trip was very fun with
Kronos-Party. The trip ended in 8 Lightyears so Foog and Passport plus
two are now ahead of time.
They then went to the police to get the badge for Saturn. The police
didn't want to give it, but when they saw his other badges the police
thought he was a police ofﬁcer. Later they heard about the bet and
were glad that they gave him a badge so he could win the bet.
They departed from Saurn with EyeYoda going to Uranus's capital
Uran. As they boarded the Starbuster, EyeYoda tripped and fell of the
aircraft. As she was falling Foog caught EyeYoda and hauled her back
aboard the aircraft. The ride to Uran would be 6 light years.
The ride got all bumpy and all uncomfortable and then suddenly a
creature appeared shooting with unknown guns damaging the engines.
Passport hit the emergency button and the alarms sounded. The
captan told the frightened passengers to calm down and that everything
is under control.
Foog picked up a laser gun and started shooting the
alien. Passport quickly got a gun also and soon almost
all the aliens were dead, but the few who servived ﬂed
saying we will come back for you! Eventually in 6
Lightyears they got to Uran and once again got the police
Sadly Kronos-Party would be leaving them now, but
EyeYoda refused to leave and came with them. They
were okay with that though the journey would only be
about 10 Lightyears. They got on the Starbuster to
Neptune's capital Posiden.
When they got on the star buster the captain told them
that they think that they might be a couple Lightyears
late. They were sad, but they new that they had a lot of
time. Foog didn't have anyone to play Go Fish with now
that Kronos-Party was gone so he just slept the whole
time. Passport talked to the other passengers while
When they ended up in Posiden they were 4 Lightyears late so it
took 14 Lightyears. They then went to the police got their ﬁnal
badge and said " To the molecular transporter!" They then went
to the molecular transporter and asked someone how many
Lightyears it would take to get back to Mercury and they said it
would take 14 Lightyears to get back to Towntown.
When the company got to Towntown Fix It Felix went up to Foog
and asked, "You are really Phileas Foog?" Foog replied, "Yes."
"Then I arrest you in the space president's name." Foog
immediatly did a double take. "Arrested?" Foog asked
incredulously "What for?" "For stealing 1,000,001 dollars in
quarters." I did no such thing." "Well then you are free to go."
They were in Towntown at the Charly Chunk Club and had won
the bet. Foog was in a complete state of euphoria. They had
proven it could be done in 80 Lightyears! It was an amazing
journey for them and they enjoyed it very much. After all the buzz
had died down Foog asked to speak to Eye Yoda in private.
When the two were alone Foog got on one knee and asked Eye
Yoda, "Will you marry me?" Eye Yoda replied, "Yes oh heavens
yes." They were wedded the next day.