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Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism

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How to free yourself from the anxiety induced from feeling the need to be perfect all the time.

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Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism

  1. 1. Paralysing Power of Perfectionism Matthew Hoelscher [email_address]
  2. 2. SMILE!
  3. 3. If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.
  4. 4. Perfectionism <ul><li>Who is a Perfectionist? </li></ul>
  5. 5. Albert Ellis, PH.D. &quot; How to Control your Anxiety before it Controls You&quot; &quot;The Myth of Self-Esteem&quot;
  6. 6. MUSTerbation <ul><li>&quot;Since it's so awful to fail, that means that I absolutely must succeed and that I'm a thoroughly inadequate person if I do not! </li></ul><ul><li>&quot;Because unfortunate things keep happening to me, they'll continually happen and make me miserable.&quot; </li></ul><ul><li>&quot;Because I failed pretty miserably at this important project, that means that I'll always fail and never succeed at important things.&quot; </li></ul>
  7. 7. Prefrences Become Musts <ul><li>Musts, Shoulds, Oughts, Demands </li></ul><ul><li>Absolute Autonomy </li></ul><ul><li>Unmitigated Love </li></ul><ul><li>Complete Gratification </li></ul><ul><li>Guarantees </li></ul>
  8. 8. If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.
  9. 9. Freedom ACT Awareness Choice Trust STOP Step Back Think Organize Proceed Universal Acceptance Self Others Life
  10. 10. <ul><li>Self Esteem </li></ul>
  11. 11. <ul><li>Unconditional </li></ul><ul><li>  Self-Acceptance </li></ul>
  12. 13. Alfred Korzybski <ul><li>&quot;I am many of my feelings and actions, but not any one of them.&quot; </li></ul>
  13. 14. <ul><li>Unconditional </li></ul><ul><li>  Other-Acceptance </li></ul>
  14. 17. <ul><li>Unconditional  </li></ul><ul><li>Life-Acceptance </li></ul>
  15. 21. Acceptance <ul><li>1. Accept the unpleasantness of mistakes and failures   </li></ul><ul><li>2. Accept the frustrations of other people stopping you </li></ul><ul><li>3. Accept the blocks to your desire that events put in your way </li></ul>
  16. 22. Relasping <ul><li>1. Acknowledge your relapsing   </li></ul><ul><li>2. Thoroughly accept yourself, your being, with your lapses </li></ul><ul><li>3. Look for the Irrational Beliefs (IBs) that led to the relapse </li></ul><ul><li>4. Dispute your IBs vigorously and persistently </li></ul>
  17. 23. If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.
  18. 24. Tim Gallway: &quot; Inner Game of Stress&quot;
  19. 25. ACT <ul><li>Awareness </li></ul><ul><li>Choice </li></ul><ul><li>  </li></ul><ul><li>Trust </li></ul>
  20. 26. Awareness
  21. 28. Choice
  22. 30. Trust
  23. 32. If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.
  24. 33. Step Back Think   Organize Proceed
  25. 34. Step Back
  26. 36. Think
  27. 38. Organize
  28. 40. Proceed
  29. 44. Freedom ACT Awareness Choice Trust STOP Step Back Think Organize Proceed Universal Acceptance Self Others Life
  30. 46. If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.
  31. 47. Paralyzing Power of Perfectionism Matthew Hoelscher [email_address]
  32. 49. Title: Paralyzing Power of Perfectionism <ul><li>Matthew (hole-sure) Hoelscher is the President of Miami Executive Coach. He is a member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). Matthew has twelve (12) years of sales and five (5) years of product marketing experience. He earned a Bachelor's Degree in Liberal Studies from Iowa State University. He graduated from the University of Miami's Proficient Coaching program. He has been a member of Toastmasters International for 5 years. He has been married for seven (7) years to a feisty woman from Argentina and has 4-year-old fraternal twin boys. He enjoys reading over 50 books a year, scuba diving, and photography above and below the water.  </li></ul><ul><li>After coaching his executive clients he found a pattern of perfectionism that was paralyzing them and keeping them from moving forward. Today will learn how to navigate around these pitfalls. </li></ul><ul><li>Please help me welcome Matthew (hole-sure) Hoelscher....  </li></ul>

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