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BERNARDO L. PAÑARES
EFFECTIVE PARENTING
IN A DEFECTIVE WORLD
DIVINE DECREES TO
PARENTS
SEGMENT 1
Love the LORD your God with all your heart,
with all your soul, and with all your strength.
Take to heart these words that...
DIVINE DECREES TO PARENTS
Deut. 6:1-9
…teach them
diligently to
your children”
“and these
Words…
…shall be
on your
hearts…
SEGMENT 2
Commit
yourself
to GIVE
TIME to
your
children
HAVE QUALITY TIME
WITH YOUR CHILDREN
HOW DO WE GIVE QUALITY
TIME TO OUR CHILDREN?
1.) DECIDE ON YOUR PRIORITY IN LIFE.
2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH YOUR
CHI...
Ano ba talaga
ang mas
mahaga
sa iyo…
TrabahoTrabahoTrabahoTrabaho oooo
PamilyaPamilyaPamilyaPamilya????
1.) DECIDE ON YOUR...
2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH
YOUR CHILDREN AT LEAST ONCE A DAY
Compared to teens who
ate with their families five
to se...
3.) PLAN FOR FAMILY
VACATIONS AND ACTIVITIES.
4.) AVOID OVER COMMITMENTS.
“Parents, do not provoke
your children to anger, or
they will become
discouraged.”
COL. 3:21
ENCOURAGE
1.) Show Faith
2.) Develop Self-Respect
a. Do not compare your children with others
b. Be enthusiastic about their interes...
1. SHOW FAITH
MagMagMagMag tiwalatiwalatiwalatiwala sasasasa kanilangkanilangkanilangkanilang kakayahankakayahankakayahank...
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE
OUR CHILDREN?
2.) Develop Self-Respect
a. Do not compare your children with others.
b. Be enthusiastic...
3.) Recognize Effort and Improvement
HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR
CHILDREN?
a. Focus on efforts not the achievements
b. Learn t...
4.) Focus on the Strengths and Assets of your
child;
a. Be a talent scout of good behavior
b. Look at alternative ways of ...
AFFIRMATION
1.) Set a Good Example for them to follow.
(Ps. 101:2-3)
I will be careful to lead a life
that is without blam...
1) WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
2) QUALITY TIME
3) RECEIVING GIFTS
4) ACTS OF SERVICE
5) PHYSICAL TOUCH
5 LOVE LANGUAGES
REBUKE &REBUKE &REBUKE &REBUKE &
DISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOUR
TEENSTEENSTEENSTEENS
Proverbs 19:18 (NLT)
Discipline your children while there is
hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives.
Proverbs 13:24 (NI...
1. ESTABLISH CLEAR BOUNDARIES
2. BE CONSISTENT
3. LET THEM
SUFFER THE
CONSEQUENCE
OF THEIR
WRONG-DOING.
5. DISCUSS ISSUES NOT
PERSONALITIES.
PROV. 19:18
1) Establish clear boundaries.
2) Be consistent.
3) Let them suffer the consequence of their wrong-
doing.
4) ...
Two Ways of Training
1) Training by Lips
2) Training by Life
ADOLESCENCE
A phase of life with major physical, emotional
and behavioral changes.
The adolescent behavior alters the
youn...
The Teen-ager’s Brain:
A work in progress
• The frontal lobe of the brain does the
bulk of its maturation between the
ages of 12 and 20.
• This region of the brain ...
Lack of common sense
Thinking that seems rigid
Decisions that seem irrational
Disorganization
Impulsiveness
Mood changes
I...
BEHAVIOR
BEHAVIOR
RELATIONSHIPS
BELIEFS
VALUES
For I am constantly
aware of your unfailing
love, and I have lived
according to your truth.
PSALMS 26:3
NEW LIVING TRANSLA...
“Teach the truth in
love…”
EPHESIANS 4:15
RULES WITHOUT RELATIONSHIP
LEADS TO REBELLION
CASE STUDY:
MICHAEL JACKSON
“All I ever
wanted in life
was a
fathers love.”
So it becomes hard for them to live with
the truth of God’s word.
MOST OF OUR YOUNG PEOPLE NOWADAYS
FAILED TO SEE THAT UNF...
Oprah Winfrey?
Kris Aquino?
Lady Gaga?
Lady Batud? (Hahahaha!)
Justin Beiber?
WHO IS THE MOST INFLUENTIAL
PERSON FOR A TEE...
A father is a LEADER….
Leadership is Influence (nothing more, nothing less)
Due to lack of intimacy with our children
BUT ...
The Pressures of Living is
Enormous
Two Ways of Training
1) Training by Lips
2) Training by Life
The biggest trust is being entrusted with
a life. The biggest responsibility is to live
that trust throughout your life.
P...
REFENCES
The Universe blossoms in the face of a child. By bringing out the best in your
child, you bring out the best in the Univer...
The sleepless nights, the career
sacrifices, the postponing of so many of
your own activities. The prize of
parenting come...
From fire and sharp objects. From unkind
eyes. From negative thoughts and cruel
criticisms. From getting into deep waters....
Gently and with love.
Understanding the intent of the child
before rushing to punish pay.
PARENTING
IS
CORRECTIN
G
http://...
And laughing. And making faces.
Singing together. Giving and receiving
hugs. Holding the child’s hand in
silence for a few...
Again and again. Month after month.
Year after year. And yet, never failing to
correct and connect.
PARENTING
IS
FORGIVING...
Of a lifetime. Without expecting returns
of favor. With genuine sharing and
caring. With friendship bands. And
heartfelt b...
So that you can see the world from their
eyes. Feel their tears, live their smiles,
and understand their dreams.
PARENTING...
Their peculiar tantrums. Tucking them
in the blanket in the middle of the night.
Their helping hand with heavy luggage.
An...
Opening the gates when the time has
come. Showing them the way.
Being able to say “Goodbye! Wherever
you go, you will alwa...
Happy Parenting!!
For hourly thoughts on various subjects, visit us at:
http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 201...
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Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 2012 & 2013)

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Effective Christian Parenting in Today's Modern World

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Effective Parenting in a Defective World (Used as a presentation at the Brokenshire College of Toril Parenting Seminar 2012 & 2013)

  1. 1. BERNARDO L. PAÑARES EFFECTIVE PARENTING IN A DEFECTIVE WORLD
  2. 2. DIVINE DECREES TO PARENTS SEGMENT 1
  3. 3. Love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. Take to heart these words that I give you today. Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you're at home or away, when you lie down or get up. Write them down, and tie them around your wrist, and wear them as headbands as a reminder. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates. DEUTERONOMY 6:1-9
  4. 4. DIVINE DECREES TO PARENTS Deut. 6:1-9 …teach them diligently to your children” “and these Words… …shall be on your hearts…
  5. 5. SEGMENT 2
  6. 6. Commit yourself to GIVE TIME to your children HAVE QUALITY TIME WITH YOUR CHILDREN
  7. 7. HOW DO WE GIVE QUALITY TIME TO OUR CHILDREN? 1.) DECIDE ON YOUR PRIORITY IN LIFE. 2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH YOUR CHILDREN AT LEAST ONCE A DAY. 3.) PLAN FOR FAMILY VACATIONS AND ACTIVITIES. 4.) AVOID OVER COMMITMENTS.
  8. 8. Ano ba talaga ang mas mahaga sa iyo… TrabahoTrabahoTrabahoTrabaho oooo PamilyaPamilyaPamilyaPamilya???? 1.) DECIDE ON YOUR PRIORITY IN LIFE.
  9. 9. 2.) MAKE SURE TO HAVE MEAL WITH YOUR CHILDREN AT LEAST ONCE A DAY Compared to teens who ate with their families five to seven times a week, teenagers who had fewer than three family dinners a week were almost four times more likely to try tobacco, more than twice as likely to use alcohol and 2.5 times more likely to use marijuana, according to new information released by Columbia University's National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse.
  10. 10. 3.) PLAN FOR FAMILY VACATIONS AND ACTIVITIES.
  11. 11. 4.) AVOID OVER COMMITMENTS.
  12. 12. “Parents, do not provoke your children to anger, or they will become discouraged.” COL. 3:21 ENCOURAGE
  13. 13. 1.) Show Faith 2.) Develop Self-Respect a. Do not compare your children with others b. Be enthusiastic about their interest c. Look at their own merit. d. Ask for their opinions/suggestions. 3.) Recognize Effort and Improvement a. Focus on efforts not the achievements b. Learn their limits c. Give positive expectations 4.) Focus on the Strengths and Assets of your child a. Be a talent scout of good behavior b. Look at alternative ways of viewing the situation HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR CHILDREN?
  14. 14. 1. SHOW FAITH MagMagMagMag tiwalatiwalatiwalatiwala sasasasa kanilangkanilangkanilangkanilang kakayahankakayahankakayahankakayahan....
  15. 15. HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR CHILDREN? 2.) Develop Self-Respect a. Do not compare your children with others. b. Be enthusiastic about their interest. c. Look at their own merit. d. Ask for their opinions/suggestions.
  16. 16. 3.) Recognize Effort and Improvement HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR CHILDREN? a. Focus on efforts not the achievements b. Learn their limits c. Give positive expectations
  17. 17. 4.) Focus on the Strengths and Assets of your child; a. Be a talent scout of good behavior b. Look at alternative ways of viewing the situation HOW DO WE ENCOURAGE OUR CHILDREN?
  18. 18. AFFIRMATION 1.) Set a Good Example for them to follow. (Ps. 101:2-3) I will be careful to lead a life that is without blame. When will you come and help me? I will lead a life that is without blame in my house. 3 I won't look at anything that is evil. I hate the acts of people who aren't faithful to you. I don't even want people like that around me.
  19. 19. 1) WORDS OF AFFIRMATION 2) QUALITY TIME 3) RECEIVING GIFTS 4) ACTS OF SERVICE 5) PHYSICAL TOUCH 5 LOVE LANGUAGES
  20. 20. REBUKE &REBUKE &REBUKE &REBUKE & DISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOURDISCIPLINE YOUR TEENSTEENSTEENSTEENS
  21. 21. Proverbs 19:18 (NLT) Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise you will ruin their lives. Proverbs 13:24 (NIV) He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him. Proverbs 23:13 (NLT) Don't fail to discipline your children. They won't die if you spank them.
  22. 22. 1. ESTABLISH CLEAR BOUNDARIES
  23. 23. 2. BE CONSISTENT
  24. 24. 3. LET THEM SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCE OF THEIR WRONG-DOING.
  25. 25. 5. DISCUSS ISSUES NOT PERSONALITIES.
  26. 26. PROV. 19:18 1) Establish clear boundaries. 2) Be consistent. 3) Let them suffer the consequence of their wrong- doing. 4) Hate the sin but love the sinner. 5) Discuss issues not personalities. 6) Be firm but loving. 7) Give appropriate discipline. 8) Forgive and forget. REBUKE & DISCIPLINE YOUR CHILDREN
  27. 27. Two Ways of Training 1) Training by Lips 2) Training by Life
  28. 28. ADOLESCENCE A phase of life with major physical, emotional and behavioral changes. The adolescent behavior alters the youngster’s relations and interaction patterns with others. Most of the adolescents in these days are facing problems and getting into more and more troubles.
  29. 29. The Teen-ager’s Brain: A work in progress
  30. 30. • The frontal lobe of the brain does the bulk of its maturation between the ages of 12 and 20. • This region of the brain that supress risky behavior is not fully formed until the age of 25.
  31. 31. Lack of common sense Thinking that seems rigid Decisions that seem irrational Disorganization Impulsiveness Mood changes Inadequate emotional control Risk taking
  32. 32. BEHAVIOR
  33. 33. BEHAVIOR RELATIONSHIPS BELIEFS VALUES
  34. 34. For I am constantly aware of your unfailing love, and I have lived according to your truth. PSALMS 26:3 NEW LIVING TRANSLATION
  35. 35. “Teach the truth in love…” EPHESIANS 4:15
  36. 36. RULES WITHOUT RELATIONSHIP LEADS TO REBELLION
  37. 37. CASE STUDY: MICHAEL JACKSON “All I ever wanted in life was a fathers love.”
  38. 38. So it becomes hard for them to live with the truth of God’s word. MOST OF OUR YOUNG PEOPLE NOWADAYS FAILED TO SEE THAT UNFAILING LOVE
  39. 39. Oprah Winfrey? Kris Aquino? Lady Gaga? Lady Batud? (Hahahaha!) Justin Beiber? WHO IS THE MOST INFLUENTIAL PERSON FOR A TEEN-AGER TODAY?
  40. 40. A father is a LEADER…. Leadership is Influence (nothing more, nothing less) Due to lack of intimacy with our children BUT FATHERS HAVE LOST THEIR INFLUENCE
  41. 41. The Pressures of Living is Enormous
  42. 42. Two Ways of Training 1) Training by Lips 2) Training by Life
  43. 43. The biggest trust is being entrusted with a life. The biggest responsibility is to live that trust throughout your life. PARENTING IS TRUST http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  44. 44. REFENCES
  45. 45. The Universe blossoms in the face of a child. By bringing out the best in your child, you bring out the best in the Universe. PARENTING IS GARDENING http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  46. 46. The sleepless nights, the career sacrifices, the postponing of so many of your own activities. The prize of parenting comes at a price. PARENTING IS A LABOR OF LOVE http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  47. 47. From fire and sharp objects. From unkind eyes. From negative thoughts and cruel criticisms. From getting into deep waters. From getting into a shallow life. PARENTING IS PROTECTING http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  48. 48. Gently and with love. Understanding the intent of the child before rushing to punish pay. PARENTING IS CORRECTIN G http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  49. 49. And laughing. And making faces. Singing together. Giving and receiving hugs. Holding the child’s hand in silence for a few moments before asking “What is wrong, dear?” plans. PARENTING IS SMILING http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  50. 50. Again and again. Month after month. Year after year. And yet, never failing to correct and connect. PARENTING IS FORGIVING http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  51. 51. Of a lifetime. Without expecting returns of favor. With genuine sharing and caring. With friendship bands. And heartfelt bonds. PARENTING IS FRIENDSHI P http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  52. 52. So that you can see the world from their eyes. Feel their tears, live their smiles, and understand their dreams. PARENTING IS BEING A CHILD http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  53. 53. Their peculiar tantrums. Tucking them in the blanket in the middle of the night. Their helping hand with heavy luggage. And with some of life’s burdens. PARENTING IS ENJOYING http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  54. 54. Opening the gates when the time has come. Showing them the way. Being able to say “Goodbye! Wherever you go, you will always be in my heart.” PARENTING IS LETTING GO http://www.thoughtperhour.com/
  55. 55. Happy Parenting!! For hourly thoughts on various subjects, visit us at: http://www.thoughtperhour.com/

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