5 lessons I have Learned in My Journey to Survive an Affair Right now, you are probably feeling devastated, enraged and humiliated. You never imagined that your spouse could have an affair… and now that it’s happened you feel alone, empty and lost.
• First think to understand – You are not alone.• Tens of thousands of couples every single year suffer from the effects of one or both of the spouses having an affair … cheating, infidelity, adultery, whatever … it’s all the result of an affair.
• here’s the most important thing you need to understand: the affair isn’t your fault at all!• That’s right — the affair is NOT YOUR FAULT.• Sure, you have done some things wrong in your relationship, but you didn’t force your spouse to have an affair — they CHOSE to do it.• And understanding THAT is the key to unlocking the secret to saving your relationship or marriage if it has been devastated by an affair.
Stage #1 – Shock and Disbelief • Even if you have suspected that something is going on, for weeks, months, or years – You are still shocked beyond belief when you find proof for infidelity. You can’t believe how they could do that to you, how they could eternally damage the delicate trust you had in them. And after everything you did for them. You feel stabbed in the back.
• Your stomach turns every time you imagine them with their lover and you can’t believe how everything you have built is shattered to pieces. There are a few emergency steps you have to take after finding out about the affair – See what they are – Right Here.
Stage #2 – Dealing WithObsessive Images of the Affair • After the initial shock has faded, you find your self obsessed. Obsessed with the details of the affair, obsessed with images of THEM together, obsessed with questioning and doubting yourself, while your self esteem has disappeared. There are effective ways to get rid of obsessive images and negative thoughts – Read about them here.
Stage #3 – Deciding Whether to Stay or Leave Will you stay and work on the problems that that led to this infidelity? Or will you leave and start over? The toughest decision you have to make. This is an article that will help you get to the right decision.
Stage #4 – How to Regain Trust • This is probably the hardest part of learning how to save marriage after an affair. Some say it’s impossible. That an affair permanently destroys every relationship. I know for a fact that it’s not true. There are ways to regain trust in your relationship, and even before that – There are signs you have to look for to figure if he or she will cheat again and if they can regain your trust back. You can find these signs- Right here.
Stage #5 – How to Forgive (But you will Never Forget) • You don’t have to forgive in order to move on with your relationship, post affair. But forgiving will make your relationship much better. Plus, it’s proven to be healthy for you. Find out how to forgive your spouse – Right Here.
I am a living proof that a marriage can survive an affair and even become much better that it used to be. Think about it: Why would you want it to return to the way it used to be before the affair?An affair is the biggest crisis a relationship can go through – But it’s also your biggest chance to discover the real problems and issues your relationship suffers from and reach a higher level of communication, transparency, love and… FUN. Start Saving Your Marriage – Right Now.