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InMails: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

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See real-world examples of InMails that grasp potential candidate’s attention and will improve your response rates. Learn more with the full InMail guide: http://slidesha.re/1qxDr66

Published in: Recruiting & HR

InMails: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

  1. 1. Recruiting Solutions InMail: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
  2. 2. Recruiting Solutions  The Good - what works to generate interest from candidates  The Bad - why candidates don't respond to certain approaches  The Ugly - how not to use the InMail system *the names, photos, titles & companies have been changed to protect the innocent & guilty alike InMail LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved
  3. 3. Recruiting Solutions LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved 3 Janice Ceresa: Q4 2014 16.5 17.8 21.7 0 5 10 15 20 25 Oct-14 Nov-14 Dec-14 InMail Response Rates
  4. 4. Recruiting Solutions LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved 4 Janice Ceresa: Jan 2015 16.5 17.8 21.7 30.1 0 5 10 15 20 25 30 35 Oct-14 Nov-14 Dec-14 Jan-15 InMail Response Rates
  5. 5. Recruiting Solutions LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved 5 Janice Ceresa: Jan 2015 InMail Response Rate Impressive
  6. 6. Recruiting Solutions InMail | LinkedIn Kevin LinkedIn is exploding, as you may know, and with a growing customer base we need to grow our small training team. We're looking for great public speakers with background similar to yours, based on your LinkedIn profile. If you are interested in talking more about this opportunity to be a part of LinkedIn from the inside, please let me know. I'd also love any referrals you could provide. Thanks and have a great day, Brooke InMail | LinkedIn Trainers Needed @ LinkedIn Brooke Lopez, Senior Manager, Corporate Training May 03, 2008
  7. 7. Recruiting Solutions
  8. 8. Recruiting Solutions When sending an InMail – Consider Passive Talent Do  Start a conversation  Make it feel personal  Strong subject line  Be brief and to the point  Mention shared connections/groups Don’t  List all job specifics  Include job title or req ID in subject line  Use jargon & biz-speak  Ask for a resume right away LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved
  9. 9. Recruiting Solutions Avoid Jargon & Biz-speak "You'll be in charge of a team of 50 salespeople and responsible for increasing revenue by 10% in your first year." "When you're not rolling up your sleeves and analyzing sales data with your team, you'll be coaching territory directors on how to perfect their negotiating skills." "You will get hands-on leadership training and learn how to motivate your team to exceed their sales goals." LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved
  10. 10. Recruiting Solutions Let's open the mailbag! LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved 10
  11. 11. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Unicom Exploratory Conversation / Customer Success Karen A. May, Senior Recruiter Oct 19, 2014 Hi Kevin, I realize that you might not be actively planning a career move right now, yet I'm wondering ... if it came your way, would you consider an outstanding opportunity? You've had an impressive career! Also, it looks like you've had success supporting high growth SAAS or mobile companies. These are key assets here at Unicom . For this reason, I want to talk with you. Over 14,000 companies now use Unicom as their analytics platform. We are highly profitable, in hypergrowth and backed by top-tier firms like Andreessen Horowitz and Sequoia. Yet in terms of staff size, we're still under 70, and our Customer Success team is still under 5. The opportunity here is wide open! We're hiring for top talent; if we make you an offer, it will be highly competitive. Also, we'll create a role for you that will fit your skills & interests. Would you be open to a brief conversation to explore this possibility? If you're interested, please reply with a specific date and time that you're available to speak with me for 10 minutes. And please include your phone number. Thanks, and have a fantastic week! Karen 555.555.5555
  12. 12. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Unicom Exploratory Conversation / Customer Success Karen A. May, Senior Recruiter Oct 19, 2014 Hi Kevin, I realize that you might not be actively planning a career move right now, yet I'm wondering ... if it came your way, would you consider an outstanding opportunity? You've had an impressive career! Also, it looks like you've had success supporting high growth SAAS or mobile companies. These are key assets here at Unicom . For this reason, I want to talk with you. Over 14,000 companies now use Unicom as their analytics platform. We are highly profitable, in hypergrowth and backed by top-tier firms like Andreessen Horowitz and Sequoia. Yet in terms of staff size, we're still under 70, and our Customer Success team is still under 5. The opportunity here is wide open! We're hiring for top talent; if we make you an offer, it will be highly competitive. Also, we'll create a role for you that will fit your skills & interests. Would you be open to a brief conversation to explore this possibility? If you're interested, please reply with a specific date and time that you're available to speak with me for 10 minutes. And please include your phone number. Thanks, and have a fantastic week! Karen 555.555.5555
  13. 13. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Unicom Exploratory Conversation / Customer Success Karen A. May, Senior Recruiter Oct 19, 2014
  14. 14. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Technodrill Sales Training Specialist @ Technodrill Lara Brady, Senior Recruiter June 9, 2012 Kevin, Hello, I noticed your profile online and wanted to talk to you about a job opportunity. I’m a recruiter for Technodrill and we are searching for a Sales Training Specialist to join our Media Sales team. This role will be responsible for the instructional design and development of training materials for the sales and account management teams. This is a great job and key to the continued growth and success of our team. The Sales Training Specialist may be based either in Sunnyvale or San Francisco. Please let me know if you would like to discuss this great full-time opportunity with Technodrill! Thanks for your time and interest. Regards, Lara 555.555.5555
  15. 15. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Technodrill Sales Training Specialist @ Technodrill Lara Brady, Senior Recruiter June 9, 2012
  16. 16. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Lamware Training Specialist for exciting start up! Michael Walters, Senior Recruiter Feb 22, 2011 Kevin I came across your profile and wanted to introduce myself to you. I work for a start up division of Lamware and currently looking for a Training and Development specialist. It is an exciting time for us right now and we are definitely experiencing some growing pains. I don't know if you are open to a new opportunity right now, but if not perhaps you know someone that is? Please take a look at our website when you have a moment and let me know what you think. We are noticing an excitement in the ad targeting industry and we are proud to be at the forefront of this boom. Thank you for taking the time to review, and I look forward to networking with you. Regards, Michael 555-555-5555
  17. 17. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Lamware Training Specialist for exciting start up! Michael Walters, Senior Recruiter Feb 22, 2011
  18. 18. Recruiting Solutions Going from Bad to Good LinkedIn Confidential ©2014 All Rights Reserved 18
  19. 19. Recruiting Solutions InMail | DeVry Education Group Outstanding Opportunity for Veterinary Technician - St. Kitts Janice Ceresa, Sr. Sourcing Consultant Oct 18, 2014 My name is Janice Ceresa and I am a Sr. Sourcing Consultant with Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine (RUSVM). I recently viewed your profile and thought you or someone you know may be interested in our Veterinary Technician positions we have open in St. Kitts. RUSVM offers a unique AVMA-accredited program of training on the island of St. Kitts, West Indies. A cutting-edge curriculum, with innovative use of technologies and simulations, provides the best possible training for tomorrow’s veterinarians. Veterinary Anesthesia Technician overview: Preferred candidates will have experience in the areas of working in an AVMA accredited school or equivalent, at least 3 years’ experience working in critical care, or with a referral practice. Licensure or certification as a veterinary technician is required. Senior Veterinary Technician - Large Animal overview: Highly skilled individual with teaching interest and experience sought to participate in large animal department as a technician and assisting with veterinary student training. 2 year Veterinary Technician certification required or Bachelor’s degree preferred from an accredited veterinary technician program. Minimum of 2 years’ experience in a clinical setting. Salary will be commensurate with qualifications and experience. Please send me a curriculum vitae (CV) at jceresa@devrygroup.com Relocation assistance and a comprehensive benefits and competitive salary await the right candidate. If you are content where you are I would be grateful if you would share this position. I truly believe the best candidates are referred not recruited. Best! Janice Janice Ceresa Sr. Sourcing Consultant Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine e: jceresa@devrygroup.com
  20. 20. Recruiting Solutions InMail | DeVry Education Group Outstanding Opportunity for Veterinary Technician - St. Kitts Janice Ceresa, Sr. Sourcing Consultant Oct 18, 2014 My name is Janice Ceresa and I am a Sr. Sourcing Consultant with Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine (RUSVM). I recently viewed your profile and thought you or someone you know may be interested in our Veterinary Technician positions we have open in St. Kitts. RUSVM offers a unique AVMA-accredited program of training on the island of St. Kitts, West Indies. A cutting-edge curriculum, with innovative use of technologies and simulations, provides the best possible training for tomorrow’s veterinarians. Veterinary Anesthesia Technician overview: Preferred candidates will have experience in the areas of working in an AVMA accredited school or equivalent, at least 3 years’ experience working in critical care, or with a referral practice. Licensure or certification as a veterinary technician is required. Senior Veterinary Technician - Large Animal overview: Highly skilled individual with teaching interest and experience sought to participate in large animal department as a technician and assisting with veterinary student training. 2 year Veterinary Technician certification required or Bachelor’s degree preferred from an accredited veterinary technician program. Minimum of 2 years’ experience in a clinical setting. Salary will be commensurate with qualifications and experience. Please send me a curriculum vitae (CV) at jceresa@devrygroup.com Relocation assistance and a comprehensive benefits and competitive salary await the right candidate. If you are content where you are I would be grateful if you would share this position. I truly believe the best candidates are referred not recruited. Best! Janice Janice Ceresa Sr. Sourcing Consultant Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine e: jceresa@devrygroup.com
  21. 21. Recruiting Solutions InMail | DeVry Education Group Paraveterinary in Paradise? Janice Ceresa, Sr. Sourcing Consultant Dec 9, 2014 Hi Kevin, I was looking at your profile today and see that you have paraveterinary experience. Have you ever thought about practicing on a tropical island paradise? My name is Janice Ceresa and I am a Sr. Sourcing Consultant with Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine (RUSVM). We offer a unique AVMA-accredited program of training on the island of St. Kitts, West Indies. It’s a cutting-edge curriculum, with innovative use of technologies and simulations that provides the best possible training for tomorrow’s veterinarians. I think it’d be a great opportunity for someone with your background and experience. Plus it’s on an island in the West Indies! Right now the school is looking for Veterinary Anesthesia Technicians and Senior Veterinary Technicians to work with Large Animals. If you are licensed and this opportunity piques your interest, please hit reply and let’s set up a time to discuss further. Best! Janice Janice Ceresa Sr. Sourcing Consultant Ross University School of Veterinary Medicine e: jceresa@devrygroup.com
  22. 22. Recruiting Solutions InMail | DeVry Education Group Janice Ceresa, Sr. Sourcing Consultant Dec 9, 2014
  23. 23. Recruiting Solutions The Good, Bad & Ugly LinkedIn Confidential ©2014 All Rights Reserved 23
  24. 24. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Greencane What’s your next play after graduation? Robert J. Knight, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014 Kevin I hope this note finds you well! I wanted to reach out to you after viewing your profile; your impressive sales skills from T-Mobile and your impending Psychology degree from Foothill College really caught my eye! I am always looking to network with bright Sales individuals, and I would like to learn more about you and your career goals. As Greencane continues to thrive, it never hurts to know more about people in our industry! If you’re interested in networking, please look at my LinkedIn profile and let me know 2-3 times when you are available to talk, as well as a good number to call! Look forward to connecting,
  25. 25. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Greencane Robert J. Knight, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014
  26. 26. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Blue Elephant Inc Networking Request Rosie Jordan, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014 Kevin I hope this message finds you well. I wanted to reach out to see if you would be open to networking with me regarding a management opportunity I am sourcing in Eden Prairie. I am currently looking for top level talent to join Blue Elephant as a Merchandise Operations Leader (Assistant Manager). This position is a high-level, exempt management opportunity that offers competitive base salary + bonus potential, full benefits, a great work/life balance and tremendous growth possibilities with our company. Please let me know if you are interested or know of anyone who might be. Thanks in advance for your time and I look forwarding to hearing from you. Best Regards, Rosie 555-555-5555
  27. 27. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Blue Elephant Inc Networking Request Rosie Jordan, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014
  28. 28. Recruiting Solutions InMail | FW Mercer Times they are a-changin' Robert E. Hopper, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014 It was Minnesota’s own Bob Dylan that that said ‘times they are a-changin’. We couldn’t agree more. We are looking to expand our areas of expertise and we think you can help. Who are we? We are FW Mercer, one of Minnesota’s top Management and IT Consulting firms - and we are looking for strong leaders like you. Here’s a little more about us: 1) Who we are: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Skz1YjPAe 2) The kind of work we do: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VyC_6Hv1 I am Senior Talent Partner employed by FW Mercer and recently viewed your LinkedIn profile while souring for a Project Managers near Cleveland. Our Project Management consultants are responsible for assessing the maturity of our clients’ project management professionals, processes, and tools. They develop recommendations for improvement and implement new solutions that allow our clients to efficiently and effectively deliver projects. I am curious if you might know someone who would be interested in this role. If you would like me to send you more info on FW Mercer, please send me an e-mail directly to rhopper@fwmercer.com. Find out more about FW Mercercareers here: http://fwmercer.com/careers. I’d love to hear if we could be the change you have been looking for. Sincerely,
  29. 29. Recruiting Solutions InMail | FW Mercer Robert E. Hopper, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014
  30. 30. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Redmedlam eLearning Opportunity in SF Steven M. Oakes, Senior Recruiter Sept 6, 2013 Hi Kevin, My name is Steven and I am with Redmedlam, an IT Staffing firm I wanted to touch base with you regarding an opportunity we have for a eLearning Technical Lead for one of our clients in San Francisco. Responsibilities: * Establish technical standards and process to publish eLearning content to a variety of different formats including LMS, Web, Podcasts and more. * Work with eLearning producers and suppliers to ensure that developments are successfully completed to specification. * Deliver a high-quality customer experience by managing the data integrity, rules, and processes for the LMS. * Recommend and put in place new eLearning strategies and technologies to help grow our portfolio and methods of reaching our customers. * Coordinate projects for external vendor run eLearning initiatives. If interested, please send me your updated resume and a good time to talk. If for some reason you are not available, then please forward this to anyone who you think maybe on the look out for new opportunitites. Thank you! Kind Regards Steven – 555-555-5555
  31. 31. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Redmedlam eLearning Opportunity in SF Steven M. Oakes, Senior Recruiter Sept 6, 2013
  32. 32. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Hatcore Opportunity - Hatcore Harry Hewitt, Senior Recruiter Apr 9, 2014 Dear Kevin, I am Harry Hewitt, a Talent Recruiter. I recently came across your profile and we are interested in speaking with you about an opportunity (Sales & Marketing Training Operations Specialist) here at Hatcore. In the case you are interested in speaking to us, please send a copy of your resume, the best number to reach you at for this conversation. Please provide a few different times/days that you are able to have a 20-30 minute phone conversation. ** We have competitive compensation, excellent benefits AND every other Friday OFF! Cal trains is one block from our office and we have free parking garage! Here is the job description link: http://careers.hatcore.com/detail.asp?jobid=hatcore1865 Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you. Harry 555-555-5555 ** In case you are not interested, please feel free to provide this description and my contact info to others who may be interested in this opportunity.**
  33. 33. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Hatcore Opportunity - Hatcore Harry Hewitt, Senior Recruiter Apr 9, 2014
  34. 34. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Duocom Management Opportunity Harry Hewitt, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014 Hi Kevin, Please feel free to pass along the great news that we have a management opportunity at our Duocom location in Council Bluffs. If you would like additional details for yourself or your network on the packages we offer our leaders and job details, please let me know! Have a great day! Best Regards, Harry 555-555-5555
  35. 35. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Duocom Management Opportunity Harry Hewitt, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014
  36. 36. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Michael Marx & Associates Blackhats Needed Dominic Wyatt, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014 Hi Kevin, I was speaking with our Sr. Security Engineer, Klayton Kopecky, about some of the highly visible projects our Security team will be embarking on in the next quarter and he mentioned our need for a true leader in the space. I took it upon myself to share your profile with him and needless to say he was impressed with your background and experience at CyberSniper so that is the reason for my note. I am sure you are busy, but I would value the opportunity to speak with you about our organization and some of the cool projects we are working on. How does the beginning of next week look for you? Thanks, Dominic 555-555-5555
  37. 37. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Michael Marx & Associates Blackhats Needed Dominic Wyatt, Senior Recruiter May 15, 2014
  38. 38. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Vila Corporation Excellent Opportunity! Clyde Brown, Senior Recruiter Dec 10, 2010 Dear Recruiting/HR Colleagues, I hope everyone is having a great year! I am writing to request your help. I'm currently seeking a Contract Recruiter in the Menlo Park, CA to support two key Medical Device companies. The ideal candidate will have 5+ Corporate Recruiting/HR experience along with strong collaboration and consulting skills. If you or anyone you know is interested let me know! Regards, Clyde Brown 555-555-5555 Vila Corporation
  39. 39. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Vila Corporation Excellent Opportunity! Clyde Brown, Senior Recruiter Dec 10, 2010
  40. 40. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Techplex Join our Talent Community Thomas Kramer, Senior Recruiter August 15, 2014 Hi Kevin, Our HR and Talent Acquisition teams are growing here at Techplex, so I'm reaching out to the Chicago area TA community to spread the word. We're looking for great sourcers, recruiters, TA Specialists and more. All of our open positions are posted here: http://www.techplex.com/postings Thanks in advance for any referrals, and please let me know if you have any questions or if I can repay the favor. Let’s keep in touch via LinkedIn - click here to register for our upcoming webinar on Building Strong Local Talent Communities: http://www.TAwebinar.com Thanks again, Thomas Kramer
  41. 41. Recruiting Solutions InMail | Techplex Join our Talent Community Thomas Kramer, Senior Recruiter August 15, 2014
  42. 42. Recruiting Solutions Checklist before hitting send  Leverage personal profile information  Appeal to passive candidates  Call to action  Mobile ready  Ask yourself if you would open, read and reply LinkedIn Confidential ©2015 All Rights Reserved 46
  43. 43. Recruiting Solutions Questions? 43 Click to view

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