Muslim way of life maulana mujaddid ashraf ali thanvi ra
Muslim Way o Life fHadhrat Maulana Mujaddid Ashraf Ali Thanwi Rah. Translated by lqbal Husain Ansari
ContentsA word from the Publisher viiiRights of Islam 1Rights of Parents 4Rights of Parents after their death 5Rights of Rulers and Subjects 8Rights of Muslims in General 10Rights of Neighbours 12Rights of non-Muslims 14Self-imposed Obligations Ist, 2nd and 3rd kind 15Removal of exaggerated emphasis from the Rights ofParentsIntroduction to the objectives of this BookMatters in which it is not necessary to obey ParentsThe correct meaning of doing good to ParentsTo Divorce or not to Divorce a wife on Parents bidding?Nobodys order to disobey Allah should be carried outIn Jihad it is lawful for a son to kill his disbelieving fatherAdmonish perverted Parents with a good graceIt is an obligatory duty of Parents to provide good educationto their childrenA useful AppendixHusbands Rights over wifeThe five branchesNumerous similar narrations bear ample testimony to this factThe five branches of the ShariatMuasharat an integral part of the Deen
vi Muslim Way o Life f Muslim Way of Life viiThe Aadaab of Salam Prayer Congregation and Khutbah 154The Aadaab of Musaafahah Qira-at and Tajweed 158Aadaab of a Majlis (gathering) Mortal Diseases and Funeral 159Aadaab of speech Faiting 160Some Malfoozat (sayings, statements, advices Zakat, Hajj, Qurbani, Aqiqa and Nazar 161and admonition) Nikah, Talaq, Khula and Zihar 162The Aadaab of listening to talk pertaining to listening 70 Purchase and Sale, Rent, Mortage, Right of Pre-emption 164Aadaab of Mulaaqaat (meeting one another) 73 Hunting and Slaughtering 166The Aadaab of the Guest Clothes, Decoration and Purdah (veil) 167The Aadaab of the Host Food and Drink 168The Aadaab of Khidmat (service to others) Fortune telling and Augury 169The Aadaab of Hadyah (gift) Miscellaneous Problems 172The Aadaab of intercessionThe Aadaab of training childrenThe Aadaab of correspondence 102The Aadaab of lstiftaa (asking a question to obtain theruling of the Shariah) 110The Aadaab of the Musjid 112The Aadaab of things in general use 114The Aadaab of Qardh (loan)The Aadaab of illness, iyaadat and taziyatThe Aadaab of presenting a requestThe Aadaab of eatingAadaab of lstinjaa 127Aadaab of parents 128Aadaab of eldersAadaab of the ShaikhAadaab to be observed by seniors for juniorsBeliefsBooks of cleanliness and pollution 150Azan, lqamat and lmamat 153
A word from the Publisher There is no doubt that Almighty Allah sent the great scholar ofIslam Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanawi as the Renovator and Spiritual (In the name of Allah the Beneficent, the Merciful)Leader. He spent his entire life in the work of ameliorating theMuslim Ummah. There is no aspect of the religious or the worldlyactivities of humanity in which he did not guide the Muslims with Rights of lslamhis writings and speeches. He has many compositions and All praise to Allah who has honoured us by saying inpublications to his credit which cover the subjects of Islamic His Book: Indeed Allah commands you fo restore toculture and civilisation, devotion social dealings and transactions, their owners the trusts (deposited with you) and toeconomic and social aspects of life, in fact, all branches of human judge justly if you (ever) judge among men. (4:58)life. In addition to his compositions on highly scientific andresearch works, he has left behind very simple books easy to Salutation and blessings on His Messenger, ourunderstand and assimilate - all this for the benefit of the general master, Muhammad, who warned us by his saying: Hepublic and those who are on a lower level of education. who has done wrong to his brother in the matter of his dignity, wealth, should free himself there from today, The book under consideration is a recombination of four of his before there is no Dinar nor any Dirham, i.e. on thebooks which are brief but comprehensive, useful and easy to Day of Judgement. Salutation and blessings also onunderstand. his household and Companions who joined every 1. Rights of lslam branch to its roots. 2. Rights of Parents It has been established by way of tradition as well reason that we have been called upon to discharge some rights, some of 3. Etiquettes of social living which are due to Allah and some to His servants. Of the rights due 4. Common Errors to the servants some concern religion and some this worldly life. This book shall, God willing, form a beacon of guidance for the Rights concerning the worldly life are also diverse, e.g., those dueMuslims. What is needed is that it should be made available to to near relatives, other relatives, particular persons, Muslims inevery Muslim household to derive from it maximum benefit. general, elders and youngers, equals and so on and so forth. May Allah help us all to follow the true Islamic teachings. Some men are either totally ignorant of these rights and rAmen! obligations or are deliberately unmindful of them. Hence, this brief pamphlet for general information and benefit. Qami Sanaullahs pamphlet entitled "Haqeeqat-ul-Islam, as referred to by me in the Furu-ul-Islam, was considered quite sufficient on this topic. The entitled pamphlet Aadaab-i-Zindagi is a short summary of Haqeeqat-ul-Islam with certain additions here and there. This
2 Muslim Way o Life f Muslim Way o Life f 3 I Ipamphlet in hand is entitled "Huquq-ul-Islam". It contains a few due to the Prophets and the Angels (P.B.U.T.). The favours Ichapters, each dealing with a particular category of rights. granted to us by the last of the Prophets, Muhammad (P.B.U.H.) I I being the greatest of the Prophets, his rights due by us are also the greatest. Some of those rights are as follows: Rights of Almighty Allah 1. To believe in the prophethood of the Holy Prophet The foremost right imposed upon the servants of Allah is that (P.B.U.H.).we owe to Allah Himself, who created and preserved, as a gift to 2. To obey him in all commands and injunctions.His servants, blessings of many kinds. He brought them out oferror to guidance. He gave them glad tidings of diverse blessings 3. To glorify and love him heart and soul.as a reward for following the path of right guidance. 4. To send him blessings and salutations (Darud & Salam) The rights which the servants owe to Allah are as follows: regularly. 1 . To have faith in the existence and attributes of Almighty The rights of the Honble Angels are as follows: Allah according to the injunctions given in the Holy Quran 1 . To believe in the reality of their existence. and the Traditions. 2. To believe that they are innocent and can commit no sins. 2. To adopt such beliefs, deeds, dealings, conduct and character as conform to the Quran and the Traditions and 3. To pronounce the salutary words "peace be upon them". I 11 to give up such of them as conflict with the Quran and the 4. To avoid entering a mosque after eating things emitting Traditions. foul smell or emitting" wind in the mosques, as these 3. To accord preference to Allahs pleasure and love over offend the Angels. There are many other acts that offend and annoy them which must be avoided, e.g., to keep the pleasure of anyone other than Allah. 4. One should not harbour love or malice for anyone, and do photos and pictures, to keep and tame dogs, unless this is permissible under the laws of the Shariah, to tell lies; to ~ good or bad to anyone except for the sake of Allah. delay, through laziness, taking bath to purify the body from coition (Ghusi-el-Janabat),thereby missing prayers, Rights of the Prophet to lay bare the body even in privacy without a necessity recognisable in the Shariah. (assalamu alai him) Rights of the companions (R.A.A.) and the It is through the guidance of the Prophet (P.B.U.T.) that we Prophets Householdcame to know the relevant features of the divine existence, The Holy Companions and the members of the Prophetsattributes and facts about Allahs pleasures and-displeasures, household are related to the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H.) by religiouslikes and dislikes which were revealed to them through Angels. as well as worldly relations. Therefore, the rights of theseMany matters of worldly losses and gains, therefore, came to light respectable personalities are included in the rights of the Holythrough the,Angels. Many Angels have been appointed to do work Prophet (P.B.U.H.). These rights are as follows:which are beneficial to us and they are discharging their dutieswith Allahs leave. That is why Allahs rights also include the rights 1. e.g. Raw garlic, onion, radish, betel-leave, tobacco, burning kerosene lamp, lighting match, etc. in a mosque.
4 Muslim Way o Lifi. f Muslim Way o Life f 5 1. To obey these respected personalities. Rights of Parents after their death 2. To love these respected personalities. 1. To pray reglrlarly for their salvation and divine mercy from 3. To believe that they are just and truthful. Allah and to send them benefits and rewards of optional prayers and monetary donations in charity. 4. To love those who love them and to hate those who hate them. 2. To deal with their friends and acquaintanceswith monetary concessions, physical services and nice behaviour. Rights of the learned and the spiritual saints 3. To visit their graves and offer "Fatiha" from time to time. (Ulama and Masha-ikh) Rights of paternal and maternal As the learned men in the apparent and the secret sphere of religious learning are inheritors of and successors to, the Holy Grandfathers and Grandmothers. Prophet (P.B.U.H.), their rights are also included in the rights of According to the laws of the Shariah they occupy the same the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H.). They are as follows: rank and status as the parents. As such they should be allowed 1. To pray regularly for the Jurists, Legists, Doctors, thesame rights, regard and respect as the parents. Therefore, the Traditionalists, Professors, Religious Saints of the mystic mothers and the fathers sisters are like ones mother and the orders and composers and compilers of religious books. mothers brother (maternal uncle) and the fathers brother (uncle) are like father. The husbands of mothers sister and the fathers 2. To follow them according to the injunctionsaf the Shariah. sister are also like father in the matter of rights. This has been 3. To respect and regard with affection such of them as are indicated in a Tradition. still a!ive and not to hate and oppose them. Rights of Sons and Daughters 4. To give them monetary help according to ones capacity. The children have also their rights over their parents, just as Rights sf Parents their parents have rights over their children. Those rights are as follows: The persons mentioned above are a means in the earning of religious blessings and benefits. There are persons whose rights 1. Parents should marry them with righteous women, so as are established and admitted in the laws of the Shariah. As an to have good issues from them. example, it is the parents who are instrumental to the birth and To bring them up during their childhood with affection upbringing of their children. Their rights are as follows: which has been considered as an act of great virtue. It has 1. Not to harm and offend them, even if they commit some specially been emphasized that one should not feel excess and offence towards their children. disgusted with daughters. It is also an act of real virtue to take care of, and bring up, daughters. If it becomes 2. To respect and honour them by word and action. necessary to engage a foster mother to give suck to a 3. To obey them in all matters that are lawful in the Shariah, newly born baby, a foster mother of good character and and to help them with money even though they may be right religious belief should be engaged, because the milk unbelievers. has an effect on the conduct and character of the suckling baby.
6 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life 7 3. To give them religious education and discipline. Rights of Kinsmen 4. To marry them as soon as they reach marriageable age. The rest of the relatives have also been granted their rights. 5. If the girl becomes a widow, then look after her well and These are : bear all the expenses necessary to support her, till her If ones close relatives are needy and unable to support second marriage. themselves with the bare necessaries of life, nor are they able to earn anything for themselves, then they should be The Rights of the Fostermothers helped with food and other necessaries to enable them to Afostermother is also just like the childs own mother, because keep body and soul together, as one does with ones ownshe suckles, the baby; she also has prescribed rights and these children, as a matter of an obligation. To help distantare as follows: relations with necessaries of life is not so obligatory, yet it is necessary to do something for them also. 1. To behave with her with due respect and regard. 2. Visits should be paid to them from time to time. 2. If she stands in need of money and any other help, it should not be denied if the person concerned is able to 3. The bonds of relationshipwith them should not be severed. render such help. If anyone of them ever does some harm, it is better to tolerate that. 3. To purchase a slave or maid and place himiher at her disposal for service, if this is possible. 4. If someone becomes a slave of his close relative he at once becomes a freeman as a result of his relationship 4. The fostermothers husband is her master and she is his with the master. maid. The husband should, therefore, be regarded as the master of the mistress, and treated, as such, with honour (Note : this is not applicable in our times) and goodwill. Rights of teachers and spiritual guiders (Pir) Rights of a Stepmother As a teacher or a spiritual guide (Pir) imparts to his disciple The stepmother is the fathers wife and companion and the education and spiritual guidance, he is just like a father. He andcommand is to do good to the fathers friends and companions. his children and relatives, therefore, deserve the same treatmentShe has, therefore, also some rights. The good deeds advised to as ones own father and children and relatives. This is also one ofbe done for the sake of deceased parents are sufficient as the meanings of the Quranic Verse.described above. These should also be done for the stepmother (I do not ask of you any return except love among the relativesafter her death. 42:23). This also implies the respect and regard which the Sadat Rights of Sisters and Brothers (relatives and descendants of the Holy Prophet (P.B.U.H.) deserve). It has been mentioned in aTradition that an elder brother is justlike a father. As such, a younger brother is like a son. The The pupils of the teacher or the disciples of the spiritual guidereciprocal rights among them will be just like those existing (Pir) should be treated as brothers in the matter of rights. They arebetween the parents and their children. The rights of an elder also included in the meaning of the Quranic wordssister and younger sister may be determined on this analogy. (the fellow-traveller).
8 Muslim Way o Life f Muslim Way o Life f 9 Rights of Pupils and Disciples 2. If two members or groups of the subjects differ from each Pupilsand disciples are just like sons and daughters. Therefore, other in some matter the rules should be neutral and justthey have rights likesons and daughters in the matter of kindness in settling their difference.and affection. 3. He should always think of providing protection, comfort Rights of Husband and Wife and amenities of life. He should make it easy for complainants to get access to him to receive justice. The wife has the following rights over her husband: 4. He should not be faultfinding but should try to forget and 1. The husbandshould not hesitate in meetingthe cost of her forgive if some indiscipline and disregard are committed living as far as his means permit. towards him by someone unintentionally. 2. He should teach her religious problems and insist upon her to do good deeds. The rights of the Ruler over the subjects are as follows: 3. He should allow her from time to time to see her close 1. The subjects should obey the Ruler and be his well- relatives and tolerate her shortcomings. If disciplinary wishers, except that there is no obedience to orders which action is ever needed he should be moderate in this. are against the Shariah. The husband has the following rights over his wife: 2. They should be tolerant, if the Rulers behaviour is 1. The wife should leave no stone unturned in obeying, sometimes unpleasant. In such asituation they should not respecting, serving and pleasing her husband, except curse and agitate; they should rather pray for the leniency that she should politely apologise to him in matters that of the Ruler and take to righteousness and obedience that I are unlawful in the Shariah. Allah may make the Ruler kind and sympathetic. This policy has been recommended in a Tradition. 2. She should not ask her husband more than what he can easily afford. 3. If the subjects receive help and comfort from the Ruler, they should express gratitude. They should not rise against 3. She should not spend his money without his permission. him out of selfishness. In places where slaves exist, it is 4. She should not offend the husband by being harsh to his compulsory to support them with necessaries of life and relatives. She should take particular care to respect and on the other hand it is forbidden for a slave to run away honour her-in-laws by regarding them as her masters. from his master. Rights of Rulers and Subjects As for the rest of the subjects, they are freemen and freewomen. They will have rights and liabilitieswhile living within the jurisdiction In the rights of the Rulers are included the rights of the King, of a government, but after going out of that jurisdiction they willDeputy King and master etc. In the subjects are included the become free snd independent.servants and the general public. The rights of the subjects are as follows: As forthe rest of the subjects, they are freeman and freewomen. They will have rights and liabilitieswhile livingwithin the jurisdiction 1. They should not be subjected to severe laws. of a government, but after going out of that jurisdiction they will become free and independent.
10 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life Rights of In-Laws 17. Supply his needs. Almighty Allah has mentioned in the Holy Quran the relatives 18. Respond to his prayer.in-laws also along with the ancestral relations. This clearly shows 19. Accept his recommendation.that the mother-in-law, the father-in-law, brother-in-law, sons-in-law and daughters-in-law and step children have also some 20. Do not disappoint him, if he asks you for anything.rights. It is, therefore, necessaryto show kindness, nice behaviour 21. If after sneezing he says "Al-ham-du lil-laah" (praise be toand sympathy with such relatives as well. Allah), respond to him by saying "yar-ha-mu-kal-laah" (may, Allah have mercy on you). Rights of Muslims in General 22. If you come across his missing things, convey them to In addition to near and dear ones and common Muslims have him.also some rights. lsbahani has mentionedthese rights in his bookTarghib waTarheeb from a narrative of Hazrat Ali (R.A.A.). These 23. Respond to his greeting.are as follows: 24. Talk to him politely and amicably. 1. If a Muslim brother commits a fault, excuse him. 25. Always do good to him. 2. Show him mercy when he weeps. 26. If he swears for anything, trusting upon you, fulfil his oath. 3. Conceal his weaknesses and shortcomings. 27. Help him, if someone does him wrong, so as to stop the 4. Accept his apology. wrongdoer from his wrongdoing. 5. Try to remove his difficulties. 28. Be friendly and do not be inimical to him. 6. Wish and work always for his well-being. 29. Do not defame him. 7. Protect and love him. 30. Desire for him what you desire for yourself. 8. Give him concession, if he is indebted or burdened. Some other traditions contain the following additional rights: 9. Pay him visits when he is sick. 31. Salute him, and better, shake hands with him when you meet him. 10. When he dies take part in his funeral and burial. 32. If by chance a quarrel occurs between you and another 11. When he invites you accept his invitation. Muslim reconcile the difference soon and do not stop 12. Accept his gift. conversation with him for more than three days. 13. Repay his good turns with goodness. 33. Do not think ill of him. 14. Give him thanks when you receive some blessings from 34. Do not envy and hate him. him. 35. Enforce the rights and forbid the wrong to the best of your 15. Help him in times of need. ability. 16. Help and protect his family and children. 36. Be respectful to elders and kind to youngers.
Musliiiz Way of Life 13 Muslim Way o Life f passengers do during railway journeys. This is very bad, 37. If two Muslims fall out with each other, try to make peace indeed. between them. Rights of the Weak and Orphans 38. Do not backbite another Muslim. There are some men who are entitled to additional rights. They 39. Do not cause him harm in any way, neither in wealth nor are : Orphans, widows, disabled ones, weak, poor, sick, decrepit in honour. persons, travellers and beggars.They have the following additional 40. Help him if he is unable to mount a conveyance or to load -rights: something on it. 1. To help them with money. 41. Do not occupy his seat by depriving him of it. 2. To work for them with your own hands, feet, etc. 42. Where there are three persons the two of them should not 3. To please and solace them. Never to reject their demands talk to each other by ignoring the third person. It should be and requests. remembered that the rights up to No. 30 are of a special nature, but the holders of those rights are also entitled to Rights of Guests the rights mentioned at 31 to 42. Likewise the guests have the following rights: Rights of Neighbours 1. To express feelings of joy and happiness on their arrival If the persons considered above, that is the common Muslims, and on departure to see them off at least up to the door.acquire any other peculiarities, they become entitled to special 2. To arrange for their usual practices and requirements inrights. An example is the neighbour. He has the following rights: order to provide them ease and comfort. 1. Deal with him with goodness and leniency. 3. To behave with them with submission, respect and 2. Protect the honour of his family. friendliness. To serve him personally. 3. From time to time send him and his family gifts. You must 4. At least for one day to entertain him with food of a help him with some food, if they are reduced to starvation. moderately improted quality, such as may neither be obliging to the guest nor financially burdensome to the 4. Do not cause him trouble and inconvenience, nor quarrel host, and host him at least for two days. This is the guests with him on small matters. right. As for stay for additional days, it is, however, not 5. The laws of the Shariah allow him preference over others becoming for the guest to cause inconvenience to the in matters of sale and purchase. The learned men of Islam host, neither by prolonging his stay nor by making undue have said that there are two kinds of neighbours: the one demands, nor by interfering in the host:s scheme of who is living in your vicinity and the other with whom you entertainment. happen to travel from the very start or come across him by chance during the journey. In the Traditions the former Rights of Friends has been called a permanent neighbour, and the other a In the Quran there is a mention of friends along with those and temporary neighbour. They both are entitled to equal distant relatives. They have the following rights: rights, which may be summarised as under: Prefer his 1. It is necessary to make a close observation of the beliefs, comfort to your own instead of giving him trouble, as some
14 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life 15 deeds, behaviour and dealings, conduct and character of 2. Bad language should not be used in conversation with those with whom one intends to make friends. If they are anyone without a sufficient cause which is permissible in found right mindedand righteous,they may be befriended, the Shariah. otherwise avoided. Great emphasis has been laid on 3. To help a non-Muslim with food, drink and medical shunning bad society. Experience and observation also treatment, if he is in distress, hungry or suffering from expose the harm of bad society. If one comes across a some disease. person of like habits, belief and character, there is no objection to befriending him, as it is recognised universally 4. If he deserves some punishment under the law of the that a friend is the greatest source of comfort and solace. Shariah no excess should be committed in that punishment nor should he be tortured. 2. Never hesitate in sacrificing for him even your life and wealth. Rights of Animals 3. If something unpleasant comes from him connive at it. If 1. Men as well as animals are living beings. As such, animals some quarrel occurs by change settle it at once instead of too have some rights. An animal should not be captured prolonging it, because even temporary differences among and confined without sufficient cause. It is cruelty to friends have some pleasant aspects. remove young ones of birds or animals from their nests or dens and torture their parents in this way. 4. Do not be neglectful in wishing your friends well or in giving them good advice. Give ear to his advice with 2. Animals are useful creatures for humanity. They should sincerity and accept it if it is practicable.There is a custom not be killed simply for the sake of fun. Hunters are in the Indian sub-continent of adopti~g someone as a son generally involved in this sin. and conferring on him all the rights of a real son. In the 3. To take good care of such animals as are in our service by Islamic Shariah an adopted son has no such rights, he giving them food and drink and providing them rest and has simply the rights of a friend. Such a one has no share shelter. They should not be beaten too much. If it is in the heritage which is subject to definite laws and is not necessaryto slaughteranimals,they should be slaughtered a matter of someones personal choice. with sharp knives or otherwise killed quickly without It is inferred from this that the practice followed in India of causing them to writhe orflounce. An animal should not bedebarring ason from inheritance is invalid in the Shariah and has, killed while hungry or thirsty.therefore, no legal force. Self-imposed 0 bligations Rights of Non-Muslims The foregoing obligations are those the discharge of which Many rightsarise out of relationshipamong persons on sharing initially devolves on man. In addition to these there are somethe same religion of Islam. In the same way some rights arise out obligations which man himself has imposed upon himself.of being members of the species, viz., humanity. In other words Some of these rights are due to Allah which are of three kinds.a Muslim has to admit and recognise the rights of his fellow manalthough he may not be a Muslim. Such rights are: First Kind 1. No harm should be done to the life or property of any A right that arises out of some sort of worship to Allah is called human being without a cause or justification. Nazar (a votive offering). If a man pledges to perform some
16 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way ofLife 17 Iprescribedworship it iscalled Nazar. It is an obligation to offer that murder; to steal or betray a trust; to defame anyone by foul talk orworship. On the other hand, if it is an un-prescribedworship, its backbiting. To compensate for these crimes or get them forgiven Ioffering is only a desirable ad. If the worship falls in the category is an obligatory liability, failing which in the Hereafterone will haveof permissible acts it is meaningless and ignorable. If the pledged to surrender the rewards of ones worship and good deeds or Ioffer is a sin, its fulfillment is unlawful. To make pledges of offer undergo severe punishment. I Iin a name other than Allahs name amounts to Shirk (idolatry). . I ConclusionSecond Kind All rightslliabilities must be discharged. As regards the rights It is a right that arises out of some permissible act. For example of Allah if they are in the form of some worship they should bethe expiation of a permissible oath and fasting as compensation observed. For example, if prayers, fasts, Zakaat (obligatory tax)for the fasts missed by a traveller or a sick person during and the like are outstanding against someone, heshoulddischargeRamazan; it is compulsory to discharge these rights. these liabilitiesafter reckoning them. In case he is unable to do so for want of time or money, he should have in his heart the intentionThird Kind to discharge his liabilities without demur as and when this These are rights which arise from the commission of some becomes possible for him. If he has committed sins, he shouldsins, as the legal punishments and expiations which become due make a solemn pledge to give them up for ever. God willing, theas obligatory rights on account of breaking fasts without any legal liabilities will be written off and forgiven.cause or murder by mistake or Zihar (calling ones wife as As regards the rights of the servants of Allah; due by anyone,mother). It is obligatory to discharge these rights also. These are the liable persons should repay those which are repayable to getrights which arise from optional causes. Of these some rights are them forgiven, just as a debt or betrayal of trust. He should alsodue to the servants of Allah. They also fall into three kinds. try to get sins like backbiting, abusing, etc., forgiven. If for someFirst Kind reason he is unable to obtain forgiveness for his sins from the right-holders, he should always pray to Allah for their forgiveness To keep a promise in a form of obedience. It is imperative. To in the Hereafter. It is quite possible that on the Day of Judgementbe negligent in keeping promise has been described as a mark of Allah may, by His mercy, make them pleasedto forgo their rightshypocrisy. in favour of the sinners. In case the defaulter is able to repay theSecond Kind debt or obtain forgiveness for his excesses, he should not fail to achieve this. The right that arises out of a permissible affair as the liability ofa debt. There are liabilitieswhich are just like debt, e.g., to accept As regards his own debts or rights outstanding against others,a sale; submission (to her husband) by a married wife of her self; he should try to realise his rights with leniency from such as canto hand over the property concerned to the pre-empter; to pay the discharge their liabilities. As for sins committed against him likeprice of purchase; to pay the dower; to pay the wages of a backbiting, abusing etc., the compensation for which cannot belabourer; to repay a debt and return a trust. These are all realised in this world, compensation in the form of good rewardsobligatory duties. are expected in the Hereafter.Yet it has been declared as a matter of greater virtue to grant pardon. Thus it is much better to grantThird Kind total pardon, specially when a debtor or a wrongdoer asks for remission and forgiveness. Th?.t right which arises out of some sinlcrime, e.g., to commit
18 kduslirn Way o Life f Introduction to the objectives of Removal of exaggerated emphasis on the this Book rights of Parents In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful Praise be to Allah and blessings on His Prophet The compiler of this pamphlet has observed since long that Li ; * J / , o , e + +J JJ~ ; c" : +>I*JLII La;J HI; j 4. *I;-many Muslim brethren exaggerate in discharging the rights of - 9 &,b IJ& ..f,+LJ 1% d&; L j & 3 2 L& +I .K @Parents to such an extent that this leads to violations of the rights I & * < e , , li 07; $ dK ;&lj+i / J j , J@ , " , , I $ :&of other claimants. In this way they also disobey Almighty Allah, # ..,"*.,,and they insist that what they are doing is according to the rules @IJi+ c L ; i ~of the Shariah. They try to justify their stand by quoting irrelevant Translation : Your Lord has decreed that you shouldQuranic verses and traditions. As this is all very painful I decided worship none except Him, and that you should showto compile with the help of Allah a pamphlet to bring out the truth kindness to parents. If one of them or both of themabout the rights of Parentsvis-a-visthe rights of others, so that the attain old age with you, do not say: "Fie" to them norrights of one group may not be ignored by giving undue importance repulse them, but speak to them gracious word. Andto the rights of another group. lower to them the wing of submission through mercy, It may be noted that Almighty Allah has created us for his own and say My Lord! Have mercy on them both as theyworship and obedience which is the main aim of our lives and the did care for me when I was a little child. Your Lord isduties which Allah has imposed on us of serving and obeying best Aware of what is irr your minds. If you areothers of His creaturesare subordinate to the Main Aim. The Main righteous, then surely He is ever Forgiving to thoseAim, viz., Allahs obedience and worship have, therefore, who turn to Him (in repentance). Give the kinsmen,preference over all other forms of service and devotion. With the the needy and the wayfarer their dues and do nothelp of Quranic verses and Traditions I am going to clarify in this squander (your wealth) in recklessness. (7 7:23-26)pamphletwhat is the Main Aim and what are subordinate matters. Old age calls for showing more regard and respect to parents, The intention of this pamphlet is to put all high and low on the and at this stage they require more service. Such regard andright path and to remove from their minds the confusion about the respect are due to Parents in all stages but special emphasis hasdue rights and liabilities of all persons as determined in the law of been laid on these services and kind behaviour in the old age, asthe Shairah. the Parents are liable to become irritated and their children are negligent sometimes. The Quranic verse No. 15 of Surah Luqman 4 3 ~ 3 w~o) (And associate with them in the world with kindness), firmly confirms this injunction, as giving trouble to parents goes against this divine injunction. One should note carefully thAt the word the uttering of which to parents in their old age has been forbidden is
20 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life 21a cause of distress to them, so neither say "Aye" to them nor scoldthem, but say a word of respect to them and treat them with all Matters in which it is not necessary to obeypossible submission and humiliation, as theytookpains in bringing Parentsyou up and taking care of you in your infancy. If sometime bychance you displease them, then at once seek their pardon, and It is right to undertake a journey (whether it is due to tradewhen they are no more in this world seek forgiveness for them or Hajj) without the permission of parents, provided thefrom Allah as often as possible. Pay to the relatives,the needy and journey is not obligatory, nor does it involve probablethe wayfarers their dues and do not squander your money, but be hazards of life. If the parents forbid such journey, it is notmoderate in all things. Allah has also commanded side by side to necessary to give up this journey because the parentsdischarge the rights of other claimants, instead of according order that it be given up. This problem is available in Durr-preference to one group over another. It is, however, implied in e-Mukhtar and Alamgiri. This ruling will be applicable withthe divine injunction that the rights of the parents have priority greater force to a journey which is obligatory, as is quiteover those of others. obvious. This is subject to the condition that either the parents are not in need of any service or if they need it they Note : This verse proves that it is unlawful to utter the have someone who can provide them this service. It iscontemptuous word "Fie" to parents, because the utterance of obvious that in such cases the parents do not have tothis and other like words hurt them, as they are insulting and suffer from any real or significant inconvenience andderogatory. Thus the overall rule is that every word or act which difficulty. In such a situation it is neither unlawful norreally()hurts parents stands prohibited by the Shariah. Children disgustful to disobey the parents.should keep in mind the implications of this injunctionalways andin every place. There is no verse in the Holy Quran which lays 2. If parents do not require money to meet their needsemphasis on the rights of parents as emphatically as this verse. recognised in the Shariah, such as food, clothes, repayment of debt, etc., and ask their sons to meet such If the word, i.e., "Fie" or some other word like this is used needs it is not necessary for the latter to meet suchamong a people as a word of respect, then it will be lawful to use demands even if they have surplus resources.it for parents. Fuqaha (Jurists) have clarified this point. Somefurther observations on this point are furnished in the following 3. It is not necessary for sons to obey their parents if thepages, supported with Traditions. parents stop their sons from offering optional prayers or from other unimportant workwithout needing any service.---1. - Some Tabieen are reported as saying: He who prays for his parents five times daily However, if the parents need some urgent service and the has paid their dues, because Allah has said: Give thanks to Me and to your parents. engagement of their children in optional pray., ~ r causes s To Me is the ultimate resort. 3134. Accordingly, giving thanks to Allah consists in inconvenienceto them, while there is no one else to serve praying to Him five times daily and similarly so is praying for the parents five times daily, thus said Faqih Abullais (R.A.). The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said; If there had them, then it is imperative for the sons to give up the been in the knowledge of Allah a lesser degree of disobedience than the word "Fie", optional prayers and serve their parents. He would have forbidden that too. So the disobedient son may do whatever he likes, he shall never enter Paradise. 4. Smoking the pipe is near forbidden. The compiler of the On the other hand, the obedient son may do whatever he likes, he will never enter "Majalisul Abrar" has proved the vice of smoking by the Fire (of Hell). The said Faqih narrated this. I said: He should give something in means of a detailed study and research on this issue. It is, charity on behalf of his parents at the time of paying Zakat, etc. The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said: If a son finds that his father is a slave, he should purchase him, then therefore, not binding on the sons to obey their parents in set him at liberty. (Narrated on the basis of correct authority). the preparationof the smoking pipe, as it will be committing a disgustful act which is disapproved in the Shariah.
Muslim Way o Life f 2322 Muslim Way of Life compulsory for the former to give the required amount of On the other hand if the pipe is of a special kind which is money to the latter despite ability to do so. harmless and does not cause any foul smell in the mouth or smoking is indicated as the only possible treatment, It has been discussed so far with the help of precedents and then it is allowed. If the parents smoke pipe under examples on what occasions it is compulsory or forbidden or compulsion and as a medical treatment and ask their permissible to comply with the orders of parents. The intention is children to prepare the pipe for them, it is binding on the to clarify that obedience to parents is not binding on each and children to carry out their order. every occasion. 5. If anyones wife is not a real source of trouble to the The correct meaning of doing good to parents, yet they ask their son to divorce his wife, the husband son is not bound to obey this order. It is rather a Parents kind of oppression against the wife to divorce her. Divorce It occurs in a Tradition that to do good to parents is better than is acontemptible act in the sight of Allah and is permissible Prayer, Fasting, Hajj, Umrah and Jihad in the path of Allah. This only under very pressing and unavoidable circumstances. Tradition is not authentic and is, therefore, not reliable. It does not To resort to divorce without justification is an oppression deserve to be called aTradition, Imam Shaukani (R.A.) has briefly and it is near-forbidden. Marriage is intended for uniting. narrated it in the Fawaid-e-Majmooah.This is also not in conformity How can separation without justification beallowed? lbnul with the Rules of the Shariah. Humam (R.A.) has made a detailed investigation about it It is mentioned in Chapter Al-birr Was-silah of the Mishkat on in Fat-hal-Qadeer. the basis of a narrative of Tirmizi that the pleasure of Allah lies in 6. It is forbidden to obey the parents and it is an obligatory the pleasure of the parents. This means that Allahs pleasure or duty to oppose them, if they order their sons to commit displeasure depends upon the pleasure or displeasure of the some sin, e.g., if they order not to support the truth, not to parents. pay Zakat or not to impart religious education or the like. Note: This may lead one to misconstrue that every good deed This is subject to the condition that the acts which they depends on the pleasure of parents; without it is a sin. This, forbid are necessary. However, they may be really however, is not the injunction. The Tradition means that Allahs hardpressed by sickness and they have no servants to displeasure is incurred only in such cases of negligence in which help them, and the prayertime hasapproached, but if they obedience to parents has been imposed by the Shariah as are left unattended,they may have to suffer great hardship. binding and a son will be considered disobedient only when he If the parents ask their sons to miss the prayer in such odd fails in discharging important duties. Thus this injunction (reg: the hours, the prayer may be missed and compensatory pleasure or displeasure of Allah) is not absolute, but it is implied prayer may be offered later on. If they stop their sons from in the overall Rule formulated in the beginning to the effect that it some act which is desirable for the sake of genuine and is compulsory to shun an act which is troublesome to the parents. reliable need of their own, the it is compulsory to obey their The cause and occasion leadingto thisTradition and the peculiarity order, but if they interfere unnecessarily their obedience of its statement imply the rights of parents and the objective is not binding. mentioned above. This has been mentioned in the book"Ashiatul- 7. If the parents ask one of their sons to give some money to lamaaa". The intention is to tell that if injunction was given to ason another son who is not at all needy, it is not at all to obey his parents and to a wife to obey her husband in every
Muslim Way of Lzfe 25 24 Muslim Way o Life f get admission into Paradise. In other words, a better entrance to matter, many peoplewould be deprivedof thevirtue of worshipping Paradise is the Fathers (Mothers) pleasure. So it is up to you to Allah which is the main aim of mans creation and also of the protect that entrance or destroy it. Tirmizi and Ibn-Majah have remembrance of their real Beloved and the true taste of His narrated this Tradition. It appears that the mans mother had a remembrance and the high accomplishments resulting from it. (genuine) grievance against that woman (her daughter-in-law) These are blessings without which a seeker of Almighty Allah and desired her to be divorced, or otherwise divorce without cannot find solace: This alone is the desired object as has already justification is oppression and, in turn, to assist oppression is also been stated in the introduction. oppression. So how could Hazrat Abu Darda permit divorce which was oppression in the said situation? This answer also applies to The Real Object of Mans Creation the Tradition about Hazrat Umar (R.A.)(2) who wanted his son to divorce his wife but the son did not like to do so. Hazrat Umar (R.A.) then brought the matter to the notice of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) for a ruling. The Holy Prophet (PBUH) advised divorce. The Quran says : I did not create the jinn and Now it is quite obvious that a companion of Hazrat Umars mankind but to worship Me. 51:56 status and honour could not do wrong to anyone. If he supposedly And there is a DivineTraditionwhich expressesthe same idea. did how could the Holy Prophet (PBUH) tolerate this and assist a Although it is weak in authority, yet it is authentic in the sight of wrong? Hazrat Imam Ghazzali (R.A.) has explained the meaning those who can see hidden things through their spiritual eyes, and of this Tradition in his book lhyaul Uloom in a like manner. it is also not prejudicial to our objective. The Tradition is: The Glad Tidings of paradise as a Reward for discharging Parents Rights 5. Baihaqi has recorded in the said chapter of the Mishkat, 1 was a concealed treasure, but wanted that I should a narrative of Hazrat Ibn Abbas (R.A.) to the effect that the Holy% become known, so I created the Creation. Prophet (PBUH) said: If a man who gets up in the morning as one who is obedient to Almighty Allah in discharging the (imperative) Thus it becomes well-known that the objective of Creation is rights of ones parents, he gets up in the morning with two doors Allahs worship and acquaintance with the True Beloved. This to Paradise opened for him. If only one of his parents is alive and objective will, therefore, be accorded preference everywhere, he behaves with the parent in the said manner, one door to and over every other objective. Paradise is opened for him. On the other hand, if a man who To Divorce or not to Divorce a Wife on disobeys Almighty Allah in discharging the (imperative) rights of Parents Bidding? the parents then two doors to Hell are opened for him and if only one of the parents is alive the only one door to Hell is opened for 4. It is mentioned at the said place in the Mishkat on the him. A man asked: Even when the parents do wrong to their sons authority of a narrative of Hazrat Abu Darda that a man called (i.e., should the sons obey their parents even when the parents upon him and said: I have a wife and my mother orders me to commit all sorts of excesses to their sons?)? The Holy Prophet divorce her. Should or should I not divorce her? Hazrat Darda (PBUH) said three times: if both the parents do him wrong, even replied: Ihave heard the Holy Prophet (PBUH) saying: The father 2. and Abu Dawood have narrated this Hadith Tirrn~zi (also the mother) is a better entrance to Paradise, i.e., a cause to
26 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life 27then he is bound to obey them. Let it be noted carefully that it is this book is to eliminate exaggeration about the rights of parentsmeant to emphasize that the sons should not.be negligent in and in the said situation they are highly desirable. It is therefore,discharging such rights of the parents as are binding upon them, desirable that unless there is some special handicap, a sonbecause of their excesses, i.e., the sons should never repay the should help his parents ever) when he has not the requisitemisbehaviour of their parents with similar misbehaviour. amount of money (nisab), even if this entails him hardship and Nobodys order to disobey Allah should be inconveniences. carried out It is not obligatory to eat money of doubtful It is not the intention to say that parents should be obeyed even purity on the order of parentsif they order to do something which is a transgression in the 7. It does not become binding on the children to eat moneyShariah, because according to aTradition,"There is no obedience of doubtful purity in compliance with the order of the parents. Thisto a created being in a matter which involves disobedience to the is because by this action the parents face no recognised andCreator".This Tradition carries in its import a peremptorycommand genuine distress. It is, however, permissible for the children tothat in no circumstances a command given by a created being obey their parents by eating such money to the minimum extentwhich means disobedience to Allah should be carried out. This of their need, if the children are facing starvation, they have noneeds to be understood well. access to pure money and their parents insist on them to eat When is it compulsory to bear the cost of money of doubtful purity. If the person advised to eat such money is a saintly person of pure and pious heart, he should not resort living of the Parents? to the use of such impure money, because such money harms his 6. A man is liable to bear the cost of living of his relatives, apparent and secret spiritual and moral integrity. The damageother than his wife, only when he possesses such amount of done to spiritual and moral character by the use of money ofmoney as makes him liable to pay the Sadqah Fitr. This ruling doubtful purity is realised and proved by actual experience. Toequally applies to the parents also. As regards the wife, her cost obey the parents in this matter is to court ones own moralof living is obligatory for the husband in all circumstances, destruction and it involves disobedience to Allah which is strictlywhether he is rich or poor (see Margin Sharh Wiqayah). This forbidden. It is not right to incur the Creators displeasure byshows that unless a man has the amount of money mentioned obeying the commands of creatures. It is a maiterof great rewardabove, it will not be obligatory for him to meet the parents in the Hereafter if in such an awkward situation a man prefers(necessary) cost of living. This exposition does not mean that a death to using impure money.man should be unsympathetic with his parents, negligent indischarging their rights and ungrateful to them, as this would be In Jihad it is lawful for a son to kill hissomething very bad. The intention by this entire discourse is to disbelieving fathereliminate all exaggerations in this matter, by stating those rights 8. It is recorded in the "Lubal-bun-Nuqool" that in the battleof parents which are obligatory as well as those that are of Badr Hazrat Ubaidah-bin-Jarrahc3) (R.A.A.) was on the side ofunimportant, desirable and permissible.The parents are masters Allahs group of the Muslim Army, while on the side of the Satansand sustainers (after Allah) of their children and deserve to be group of the Infidel army was his father who was a Mushrik andtreated with great respect and obedience. The rights of the was trying to kill his son. Hazrat Ubaidah (R.A.A.) saw that hisparents are too well known to be mentioned. The real objective of 3. He is a vety righteous companion.
28 M s i Way of Life ulm M s i Way ofLife ulm 29disbelieving father was trying to kill him because of his Islam. Admonish perverted parents with a goodWhile trying to save himself Hazrat Ubaidah was able to kill hisfather. On this occasion the following verses were revealed. grace Hazrat Abu Bakr (R.A.A.)s father Abu Qahafah", while he If the parents are perverted, they should be admonished in awas an unbeliever, uttered some undesirable words for the Holy very nice manner. It is not a sin but a good deedc5) if, whenProphet (PBUH). Hazrat Abu Bakr (R.A.) at once slapped him and necessary, they are scolded. It is not lawful to concede to anyonehe fell down. Then the victim lodged a complaint about this in a religious matter, except that, as far as the Shariah allows.incident to the Holy Prophet (PBUH). On being questioned, One should be civiV6),and polite and should not be rude andHazrat Abu Bakr (R.A.A.) told the Holy Prophet (PBUH), that if he should be calm and considerate in ones behaviour.had a sword he would have cut off his neck for uttering such As regards Hazrat lbrahim (A.S.), he did not offend his fatherinsulting words. Then these verses were revealed. These two in spite of the latters disbelief and disobedience, because heincidents are the cause of revelation of these verses, which occur hoped that the father would accept the admonition given within Surah Mujadalah (58:22). Their translation runs thus: goodwill and politeness. It was due to this affection that he made You will not find people who believe in Allah and the a promise to ask forgiveness for him. However, when Hazrat Last Day, loving those who oppose Allah and His lbrahim (PBUH) lost hope and came to know that his father was Messenger, even though they be their fathers or their Allahs enemy and seeking forgiveness for him would not be sons or their brethren or their clan. As for such, He useful for him, he became disgusted with his father. has written faith upon their hearts and has 9. It is mentioned in the book lhyaul Uloom that Allah sent a strengthened them with a spirit from Him; and He will revelation to Hazrat Moosa (A.S.) that he who is disobedient to bring them into Gardens underneath which rivers Allah but obedient to his parents, is recorded in the Sheet of flow, wherein they will abide for ever, Allah is well- Deeds as righteous because of his obedience to the parents, but pleased with them and they are well-pleased with the one who does otherwise is recorded as a sinner. If the him. They are Allahs party. Beware! Is it not Allahs authencity of the narrative is correctly established one may party who are the successful? misconstrue from it that the status of obedience to Allah and His These verses make it quite clear that the rights of parents are rights is always inferior to that of the parents. This, however, is notnothing as compared with the rights of Almighty Allah. It is now the truth. The meaning of theTradition is that a person who obeysestablished that it is quite right to kill ones own father with ones his parents in matters in which their obedience is lawful, whetherown hands in Jihad (Holy War). the obedience is obligatory or only desirable, then on account of the blessings of this obedience, the person concerned is excused There is a ruling in the Hidayah that one should not himself kill from the liability towards Allahs rights. On the other hand, if aones father but beckon to someone else to do so. This latter ruling person fails to discharge the necessary rights of the parents, thenis desirable in order to observe the fathers right of respect, and this failure in disobeying obligations relating to the rights of Allah;at the same time to attain the objective. This is possible only when 5. What Az-Zamakh Shary has narrated from Huzaifah (RAA) proves this. He soughtanother person is available on the occasion to do the job. The fate the permission of the Holy Prophet (PBUH) to kill his father who was fighting on theof disbelief and perversion is disgrace. As such, the regard and side of the Mushrikeen. He (PBUH) said: Let this be done by someone other than you .....respect due to a disbelieving father cannot be fully protected. 6. The Quran clearly forbids to repulse parents. If the parents insist on some sin, their children should pray for their guidance and avoid hurting their hearts - Khulasatul-4. He embraced Islam later on. Fatawa.
30 Muslim Way o Life f Muslim Way o Life f 31so the person is recorded as disobedient. This is because if a circumstancesdo they tolerate disobedienceto Allah, irrespectiveperson does not discharge his liabilities towards the servants of that anyone likes this or not.Allah in spite of his capacity to do so or does not obtain remissionfrom them his liability is not written off, because Allah is want-Free 11. Remernbrance()of Allah is better than renderingfinancialbut His servant is needy. It is not the meaning that a person will help to the parents or others, or rendering other unimportantbe recorded as disobedient by disobeying unimportant orders of services. Educational service is still much better. This is provedhis parents, notwithstanding that he is discharging the rights of by a Tradition.Allah. This fine difference needs to be noted carefully. Praise be to Allah that so far it has become amply proved that it is not lawful to obey parents orders in violation of the injunction It is an obligatory duty of Parents to provide of the Shariah. Those occasions have also become known on which obedience to parents is an obligatory or desirable duty. To good education to their children conclude, it is not binding to carry out each and every order of the 10. A man complained to Hazrat Umar (R.A.) against his son parents. According to authenticTraditions"Keep men in their right because he used to cause him trouble and distress. Hazrat Umar places". Do not go beyond the limits in praising or degrading (R.A.) inquired from his son the cause, admonishing him to fear anyone. The best of humanity,the master of the Prophets (PBUH)Allah in the matter of the fathers rights. The son replied that has himself forbidden people to attribute to him undue praise,according to injunctions of a Tradition he had three rights: (1) although his status is much higher than that of parents and others.Naming him a good name, (2) giving him good education and (3)marrying him in a good family (according to the rules of theShariah), so that the people might not taunt him for having a badand lowly wife. His father did not discharge any of the sons rights.(How can an uneducated person find out the rights and liabilitiesto be able todischarge them?) Hazrat Farooq, the Great (R.A.) did (And our last call is thatall praise be to the Lord of thenot demand anything from the son and said to the father; you say Worlds and blessings and peace be upon the Masterthat your son causes distress you, but you have done the same of tne Messengers, his household, all of them).to your son before hand. Get away from here. lmam FaqihAbullais has narrated this Tradition which has been mentioned A useful Appendixhere only in brief. The Islamic Shariah has considered and The Rights of Teachers, Spiritual Guides (Pirs) and Husbanddistributed everybodys rights and liabilities and according to this and Wife.distribution are the actions and duties demanded of each person. 1. Teachers and Spiritual Guides have numerous rights, yet lmam Allamah Suyuti (R.A.) has written in the Tazkirah that in lesser degrees than those of the parents. Those people areHazrat Saeed-bin-musayyib is a great Tabi-ee. He surpassed all mistaken who have given preferenceto the rights of Teachers andthe Tabi-een in learning and was a miracle-working saint, but hehad broken away from his father and totally relinquished him (for Spiritual Guiders over those of the parents. Perhaps they arguesome religious cause). This break-up continued till one of them that the parents bring up their children in their outwardly anddied. Praise be to Allah that men of Allah show no concession to physical development and the Teachers and the Spiritual Guidesanyone where Allahs disobedience is involved. In no give them inner and spiritual education. The superiority of the soul 7. For details see Sharh Mishkat by Ash-shaikh of Delhi.
32 Muslim Way o Life f Muslim Way o Life f 33over the body is quite obvious, but this argument is weak and Husbands rights over wife unreliable, because the superiority of one to the other is onlypartial, not total. The superiority of some thing to another thing 2. The wife is duty-bound to serve her husband and fulfil hisfrom one aspect may negate the superiority of the latter to the wishes. She cannot do some permissible act which hinders in the service of the husband. There is none in the world who holds aformer from some other aspect. The Quran and the Hadith also right over anyone greater than the right which a husband holdsdo not attach any special importance to the rights of Teachers and over his wife. There is a Tradition in the Mishkat in which the HolySpiritual Guides as they do with regard to the rights of the parents. Prophet (PBUH) is reported to have said: if 1 were to allow anyoneThe rights of Teachers and Spiritual Guides arise from their to prostrate himself before anyone other than Allah, I would askservice in education and spiritual training only. As against this, the a wife to prostrate herself before her husband. This provesparents bring up and breed their children with great painstaking beyond doubt the high status of a husband that if worship ofand selfless love. They do not withhold their natural love, attention anyone other than Allah was permitted, none other than aand care for their children in spite of their impudence and husband would deserve such worship from his wife. It is, however,rebellion. They sacrifice their heart and soul for their children. On not essential for the wife to obey without hesitation and negligencethe contrary, the Teachers and the Spiritual Guides do not tolerate in all matters (which do not violate the Shariah) which would, inthe least offence and disrespect. Reward is in proportion to work. the case of disobedience, put the husband to trouble or depriveAs the work of the parents is harder and more difficult, their status him of some service. This topic has been dealt with in some detailis also greater and higher. In very exceptional cases some concerning the rights of the parents. The same injunctions applyparents are found less loving and sympathetic with their children here also but with greater emphasis. I state below some problemsthan the Teachers and the Spiritual Guides. But this happens very by way of example and clarification.rarely and is ignorable. It cannot form a basis for the general rule.Mind carefully that the basis is that which has been stated above. According to the Rules of the Shariah theDischarge the rights of Teachers and Spiritual Guides heart and possessions of a husband and his wife aresoul as you receive from them attributes of humanity and Allahs quite separatepleasure, yet mind the prescribed limits. This brief essay issufficient for the occasion. 1. The possessions of husband and wife are considered in the Rules of the Shariah quite separate from each others. The Some say that it is binding to divorce a wife at the order of a property the right of whose purchase, sale and disposal vests inTeacher. This is a sheer lie. And as has already been explained the wife is her exclusive property. Similarly, the property ineven the parents do not deserve such rights on all occasions. respect of which the husband enjoys such rights is his exclusiveThey, however, deserve only regard and respect and service property. If by mixing together or misappropriation the value of thewhen needed as is done to other elders. It is not necessary to obey property goes down below the level of Nisab (limit prescribed forthem like parents, but mind carefully that they may be next to Zakat), the Zakat and the like will not get absolved. If the husbandparents in deserving obedience. One should not be negligent in asks his wife not to pay Zakat on the plea that their properties areshowing respect to a Teacher and in discharging in his rights even not separate but are one and the same the wife should not obeyif the latter is a disbeliever and sinful. Such a teacher should, her husband in this matter, because this involves disobedience tohowever, be condemned inwardly. Allah. Obedience to a man at the cost of obedience to Allah is strictly forbidden, but people generally ignore this point.
34 Muslim Way of Life Muslim Way of Life 35 What is Obligatory, Essential and Sunnah 5. If the husband desires his wife without any duress to do some work for some of his relatives or some stranger such as cannot be abandoned at the husbands baking bread, sewing clothes or the like, the wife is not bound to Bidding do this. If the husband gives such order under some duress and 2. The wife is not bound to obey her husband, if he stops her he will be in some trouble if his order is not obeyed then the wifewithout any Sharaee cause from spending the money in her should do the work (FaidahJalilah). If a wife does sewing work forexclusive possession for some lawful purpose. It is. however, not some stranger (without any emergency), there is no sin in this;good to resort to quarrel with each other; they should live together provided that the man is religious and there is no fear that anin complete harmony and cooperation as far as possible on such untoward situation will arise. If that man is irreligious and there isoccasions. To avoid trouble and disruption a wife may obey her a fear of some ugly situation to arise on this account, it is not righthusband in !awful and permissibly disgustful matters, except that to do sewing work. Some bad characters take delight from suchshe cannot give up, at her husbands bidding, all that is obligatory, work.essential and Sunnah. This brief account has been written to save wives from falling 3. It is lawful for a wife to swear allegiance to a Spiritual into exaggeration, so that they may be advised about the occasionGuide (Pir) with her husbands permission, subject to the condition on which it is necessary to obey husbands and husband as far asthat this allegiance does not lead to some quarrel and breach of possible according to the rules of the Shariah is a great boon. Aharmony. For example, if the husband stops her from this, but she woman obedient to her husband shall obtain a high rank inwant to swear allegiance, then she should do this; placing Paradise. She should also take care of the optional prayers andreliance on Allah, if she has courage enough for that. If this brings I virtues, because the main objects of mans creation is to worshipupon some sorrow and distress, she should bear this with I Allah. A detailed description has already been given about the I circumstances in which Allahs remembrance is better thanpatience without expressing ingratitude. The servants of Allahhave to face such tortures. Such men will be raised to great ranks unimportant obedience to the parents. The same injunctionsin the Hereafter. The same injunction applies to such acts as are apply here also: near forbidden but the husband orders his wife to do them. One should not attach his Heart to the temptations of this world. Orders about optional worship in the It is a place to learn lessons, presence of the husband I It is not a pageant. 4. If the husband is at present at home the wife should not Iengage herself in optional prayers, fasting, etc. without his Praise be to Allah that this Useful Appendix is now complete.permission,lest there should be some shortcoming in his service. May Almighty Allah accept it and render it useful, in honour of theShe can do so with his permission. The Tradition prohibits this merciful Messenger; blessings and peace be on him.while the husband is at home; no permission is necessary if thehusband is away. The sameTradition lays down that it is not lawfulto do such acts without the husbands permission, as are liable tohinder the discharge of the husbands rights; it is, however, allright to do all other acts according to the rules of the Shariah.