1.
g’da mate. How are you going?
y

2.
a year ago, i made the decision to move to australia.
(Cue the OooHhhs and Aaahhhs)

3.
in the u.s. we love australia.
it’s a country that quite possibl has
y
more hoopla than santa claus himself.

4.
it’s a land of kangaroos.
beaches.
bikinis.
crocodile hunters.
and people who like to eat shrimp on the barbie.
(whatever that means)

5.
Every american child grows up wistfull stating,
y
“one da i’m going to visit australia.”
y,
it’s a bucket list favorite.

6.
i w one of them.
as

7.
but The onl thing I reall knew for sure about this foreign land:
y y

8.
it is far, far a a
w y.
(twenty-six hours by plane if I remember correctly)

9.
when i finall arrived,
y
i had a lot to learn.
(Like australia is more than just a big land mass, it has six states)

10.
(and New zealand is not one of them)

11.
kangaroos are cute.
(but tasty too)

12.
the sun doesn’t al a shine.
w ys

13.
but when it does, micro-trunks are a thing of beauty.

14.
awalk in the “bush” has nothing to do with lawn plants.

15.
in fact, sometimes there is an ironic lack of shrubbery in “the bush.”

16.
australian rules football (footy)
is nothing like football.

17.
meat pies are eaten with tomato sauce, not ketchup.

18.
this stuff requires a certain palate
(or birthright).

19.
savory pumpkin kicks sweet
pumpkin’s you know what.

20.
they reall do love barbies
y
(but their barbies prefer lamb).

21.
best of all:
abbrev lang* is used by everyone,
not just teenyboppers.
*abbreviated language, come on get with the lingo.

22.
avocado= avo

23.
not to be confused with:
afternoon = arvo

24.
try this on for size:
w ant to come over for a cuppa in the arvo?
If you’re hungry, we can ha a on toast.
ve vo

25.
and that’s just a little taste
of this very far a a place.
wy
(we didn’t even make it to the tim tam slam)

26.
don’t you worry dorothy,
i won’t give all the secrets of oz a a
w y.

27.
just know

28.
australia is definitel worth the trip.
y
dream on kiddos.