X-Ray Listening: Clean Language section for NLP Master Practitioner Course

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By Judy Rees, delivered Ecclefechan Sept 2013

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  • Thought is made of metaphor just as matter is made of atoms
  • Share with you the specific coaching techniques which can be used to release the power within those metaphors. Called Clean Language.
  • start telling stories. Roland’s 34.8 m euro project. conflict - Ireland, South Africa, Gaza UK health service and BBC: 5-minute coach model
  • Thought is made of metaphor just as matter is made of atoms
  • Share with you the specific coaching techniques which can be used to release the power within those metaphors. Called Clean Language.
  • And nuclear bombs
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  • X-Ray Listening: Clean Language section for NLP Master Practitioner Course

    1. 1. X-Ray Listening Judy Rees
    2. 2. Judy Rees • Passionate about connecting minds and bodies via metaphor, to catalyse change • Co-author of Clean Language: Revealing Metaphors and Opening Minds • International coach and trainer
    3. 3. Asking About Metaphor • When you are listening at your best, you are like... what? (Starter question only) • What kind of X (is that X)? • Is there anything else about X?
    4. 4. What did you notice?
    5. 5. Listening Benefits • Brings you clarity about what people mean • Reduces misunderstandings and conflict • Helps listenees to think precisely • Builds rapport and trust • Conceals your ignorance!
    6. 6. AreYou Listening? 1.Listen 2.Be distracted 3.Listen Notice what happens!
    7. 7. What Makes A Good Listener? Your suggestions
    8. 8. Deeper Listening? 1.Person A talks about something important to them 2.Person B listens without speaking (can smile and nod) Notice what happens!
    9. 9. What Happened? • When you were being listened to? • When you were the listener? • To the relationship between you?
    10. 10. Parrot Phrasing
    11. 11. Parrot Phrasing 1.Person A talks about something important to them 2.Person B encourages them by repeating selected words and phrases 3.Person C listens for metaphors and makes some notes for later
    12. 12. A waitress increased her tips by 70% simply by repeating the customer’s order back to them in their own words, rather than saying “okay” or “coming right up” University of Nijmegen, 2005
    13. 13. Metaphor
    14. 14. Metaphor Thought is made of metaphor - the native language of the unconscious mind
    15. 15. Metaphor Describes one kind of thing in terms of another kind of thing
    16. 16. Surfaces And Essences Douglas Hofstadter and Emmanuel Sander
    17. 17. Metaphors In Mind • Categorising • Creating • Interpreting • Deciding • Learning
    18. 18. Coins Activity • Take a handful of coins • Arrange them to represent either: • you and your family, or • you and your colleagues
    19. 19. Metaphor In Language • Six metaphors per minute • Side-effect of metaphoric thought • Can be used to connect with the unconscious mind
    20. 20. Metaphor in Thought • Change in metaphor in language can lead to change in thought • Change in metaphor in thought “rearranges neurology” - everything changes
    21. 21. The Mind
    22. 22. David Grove’s Clean Language Clean Language Precision toolkit for working with metaphor in thought
    23. 23. Noticing Metaphors
    24. 24. Natural Metaphors • Cliches and proverbs • Common metaphors - eg. journey, game, space, force • “It’s like...” is stated or implied
    25. 25. Directing attention with questions
    26. 26. Clean Language Questions • Precision tools for working with people’s thoughts and directing attention • Designed to minimise content input • Include as few presuppositions and metaphors as possible
    27. 27. • Use only the given question, with one or more of the person’s own words • “And when...” with a parrot-phrase is used as a connector Clean Language Questions
    28. 28. David Grove 1950 - 2008
    29. 29. Clean Language • Created by David Grove for therapy • Modelled/codified by Penny Tompkins and James Lawley • Now ideas applied in multiple contexts - management, coaching, marketing etc • Increasingly supported by academic research
    30. 30. “Constraint inspires creativity”
    31. 31. What happens when you are asked a question?
    32. 32. The art of directing attention
    33. 33. The 2 Lazy Jedi Questions
    34. 34. 2 Lazy Jedi Qs: Uses • Finding out more about anything!
    35. 35. 2 Lazy Jedi Questions • What kind of X (is that X)? • Is there anything else about X?
    36. 36. Words Are Personal • Think of a flower • What kind of flower is your flower?
    37. 37. Using The 2 LJQs • What’s one of the goals you have in life? (Starter only) • What kind of X (is that X)? • Is there anything else about X?
    38. 38. What did you notice?
    39. 39. The Dark Side Of Metaphor
    40. 40. Discovering A Metaphor • Listen for, and notice, natural metaphors • Or ask:“And that’s... like... what?” • Ask very slowly, with long pauses • Metaphors are personal • Ask Clean Language questions - the details are always different
    41. 41. Handling The Dark Side • Notice - is this a metaphor for a problem or an outcome? • If it’s a problem, take care! Either: • Use Power Switch immediately or • Ask up to two LJQs before asking for a metaphor, then use the Power Switch
    42. 42. Exploring A Metaphor • Start with “What would you like to have happen?” • Explore that outcome with Clean Language questions • Listen for, and explore, metaphors • If drifting into problem, use Power Switch
    43. 43. The Power Switch • And when <problem>, what would you like to have happen?
    44. 44. The Power Switch Uses • Changing focus from negative to positive • Changing mood/state • Unsticking • Persuasion, influence, sales • Conflict resolution
    45. 45. Power Switch Practice • Start by stating a minor problem • “And when <problem>, what would you like to have happen?”
    46. 46. Power Switch Practice • This time, start with a metaphor for a minor problem • And <problem> is like... what?>
    47. 47. Practice • Person A talks about something/someone they love (or a metaphor for that) • What kind of X? • Is there anything else about X? • “And when <problem>, what would you like to have happen?”
    48. 48. Feeling to Metaphor • Person A mentions a feeling • What kind of X? • Is there anything else about X? • Where/whereabouts is X? • And that’s like... what?
    49. 49. Unlocking The Emotional Brain Bruce Ecker, Robin Ticic, Laurel Hulley
    50. 50. Coaching With Clean • Get a “towards” outcome • Get a metaphor for that outcome • Develop the metaphor until chimes • No fixing! Elicitation is the intervention
    51. 51. Coaching With Clean • What would you like to have happen (as a result of this module)? • What kind of X? • Is there anything else about X? • Where/whereabouts is X? • And that’s like... what?
    52. 52. Necessary Conditions • What needs to happen for X? • Conditions are often “nested”
    53. 53. When you are working at your best, you are like what?
    54. 54. Starts 3 October http://bit.ly/181xxxw http://bit.ly/181xxxw
    55. 55. Judy Rees www.xraylistening.com - blog www.learncleanlanguage.com - resources www.judyrees.co.uk - coaching
    56. 56. http://youtu.be/D7rFhf7 G84U http://youtu.be/D7rFhf7 G84U
    57. 57. http://youtu.be/2cU56S WXHFw http://youtu.be/2cU56S WXHFw
    58. 58. http://youtu.be/aVvcU5 gG4KU http://youtu.be/aVvcU5 gG4KU

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