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HOW TO
“GET AWAY WITH
MURDER”
HTTP://IMAGES.CATCHNEWS.COM/UPLOADS/IMAGES/2015/07/06/VYAPAM-MURDER-TOLL-LEAD.JPG
COVERT NAR...
HUMANS ARE COMPLEX CREATURES
CAPABLE OF ACTS OF GREAT EMPATHY
http://www.spring.org.uk/images/empathy-1.jpg http://agilitr...
BUT THEY ARE ALSO
CAPABLE OF ACTS OF GREAT CRUELTY
EVEN MURDER
Huma
http://www.christopherteh.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/...
WHY IS COVERT NARCISSISTIC
ABUSE SO DEADLY?
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OWHyRudb6RE/maxresdefault.jpg
PROLONGED COVERT ABUSE
CAN END WITH HOMICIDE
http://acdn.newshunt.com/fetchdata7/20160408/asianage/headines/images/800x480...
PROLONGED COVERT ABUSE
CAN END WITH SUICIDE
http://images.medicaldaily.com/sites/medicaldaily.com/files/styles/headline/pu...
PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC
ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR SPIRIT
https://www.smashingmagazine.com/2009/03/30-beautiful-surreal-a...
PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC
ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR MIND
http://pixelnase.deviantart.com/art/Flying-Brain-70830224
PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC
ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR SOUL
http://na.square-enix.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/post-ima...
ON THE SURFACE WE SHARE
THE SAME HUMAN CONDITION
OUR WELLNESS RELIES ON OUR
BODY, MIND, SPIRIT + EMOTIONS
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zG0q_aDDd48/UJBrG5LqN0I/AAAAAAAAAIs/RIf...
FROM "WELLNESS," BY BRIAN LUKE SEAWARD, PH.D., P. 29 IN THE ILLUSTRATED
ENCYCLOPEDIA OF BODY-MIND DISCIPLINE, EDITED BY NA...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ATTACKS
BODY, MIND, SPIRIT AND SOUL
https://psychologicanarchist.files.wordpress.com/2016/03/dar...
WHAT IS
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE?
To begin with …
"Forget what you think you know
about narcissism.”
Richard Grannon http...
MYTHS THAT DON’T APPLY TO
COVERT NARCISSISTS
You are Told: Narcissists are always brash, loud, assertive,
flashy and confi...
MYTHS THAT DON’T APPLY TO
COVERT NARCISSISTS
You are told: Narcissists are ambitious, successful, go-
getters full of ener...
SO, WHAT IS
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE?
Covert narcissism is a more discrete form of
narcissism displayed by a person with ...
IN THE GRAND SCHEME OF LIFE
THIS ALL SOUNDS PRETTY TAME!
To understand how lethal covert narcissistic abuse can be
we can ...
A METAPHOR: “THE BOILING FROG”
FROM THE STORY OF B, BY DANIEL QUINN
BANTAM PUBLISHING 1996
If you drop a frog in a pot of ...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE IS
PERNICIOUS ABUSE
It is outside the victim’s and other’s awareness
It occurs behind the scenes...
THE PERNICIOUS ABUSE GOES
UNRECOGNIZED AND UNQUESTIONED
http://orig12.deviantart.net/eaae/f/2010/215/0/c/__violent_love_by...
COVERT NARCISSISTS EMPLOY THESE
SUBTLE WEAPONS OF ABUSE
Disregard all valid requests
Sarcasm
Neglect
Emotional abandonment...
COVERT NARCISSISTS EMPLOY THESE
SUBTLE WEAPONS OF ABUSE (CON’T)
“NARC
SPEAK”
https://robertmgoldstein.files.wordpress.com/...
SO, HOW DO COVERT NARCISSISTS
GET AWAY WITH MURDER?
They implement identical Execution Tactics
Let’s look at these in more...
THEY CHOOSE THEIR TARGETS CAREFULLY
Sensitive
Empathetic
Kind
Trusting
Likes to help others
Honest
Loving
Curious
Friendly...
PREFERABLY PEOPLE SECURE
CHILDHOOD ATTACHMENTS
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ngJ1Iwi85FI/maxresdefault.jpg
THEY TEST TO ENSURE THE TARGET
IS KIND, CARING AND EMPATHETIC
http://www.idontstink.com/images/kindness_challenge_page.jpg
A GOOD SOB STORY WORKS WONDERS!
http://orig06.deviantart.net/e896/f/2011/220/c/8/sob_story_by_euphreana-d45vvt3.jpg
COVERTS MIRROR THEIR TARGET’S
NEEDS, DESIRES, VALUES AND FEARS
ALWAYS
WEAR
A
MASK
https://usercontent2.hubstatic.com/12115...
CONVINCE THEM THEY ARE THEIR
SOUL MATE
https://avalancheofthesoul.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/lovebomb.jpg
https://s-media...
COVERT NARCISSISTS PRETEND TO BE
THE NICEST, MOST CARING, KIND, GENEROUS,
TRUSTWORTHIEST PERSON ON THE PLANET
http://www.s...
ONCE THE VICTIM IS HOOKED
THE COVERTS TAKE THEIR TIME
ABUSE IS SUBLIMINAL
Months …
Years …
Decades work best!
subliminal
s...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS
USE “WHITE ANTING”
White anting refers to
the action or process
of bringing down (a
person) fr...
WHITE ANTING CAN BE LETHAL
https://erininjuba.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/ants-go-marching3.png
COVERT ABUSERS GRADUALLY EMPLOY
CONTROL AND MANIPULATION TACTICS
USUALLY “BEHIND THE SCENES”
Devalue, denigrate, dehumaniz...
THEY SET UP “NO WIN” SITUATIONS
Impossible to please
Damned if you do/don’t
Blame shifting
Circular conversations
Projecti...
USE ‘ALWAYS’ AND ‘NEVER’
STATEMENTS THAT ARE RARELY TRUE
“I never get affection.”
“I always give into you.”
“You never lis...
COVERTS ABUSE INTERMITTENTLY
THIS PATTERN IS REPEATED OVER TIME
Abuse for short burst.
Behave normally.
Repeat episode of ...
https://emma75love.files.wordpress.com/2015/10/narc-cycle.jpg
THE SILENT TREATMENT IS A
SANITIZED VERSION OF MURDER
http://rickthomas.net/weekend-shorts-silent-treatment-is-the-sanitiz...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS
VIOLATE ALL BOUNDARIES
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Tpn4sqyBHlE/T_sTexBRn9I/AAAAAAAAAjM/mzgPsU2c0...
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rHA_i9rTwGY/TxgKQV4dCXI/AAAAAAAAA7Q/KnWYfFMb7Lw/s1600/gaslight6.png
‘GASLIGHTING’ IS WEAPON OF C...
‘… GASLIGHTING, ESPECIALLY
IF IT IS REPETITIVE, CAN
PRECIPITATE A WIDE RANGE
OF PSYCHIATRIC DISORDERS,
UP TO AND INCLUDING...
GASLIGHTING
http://queenbeeing.com/twisted-toxic-love-inside-the-distorted-mind-of-a-narcisssist/
SOME GASLIGHTING TECHNIQUES
TAKEN FROM THE NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE
WWW.HOTLINE.ORG
Withholding: the abusive par...
GASLIGHTING DESTROYS
THEIR TARGET’S REALITY
https://jackbrummet.blogspot.com.au/2009_05_01_archive.html
COVERT ABUSERS EXPAND THEIR
“REACH” AND “INFLUENCE”
http://image.slidesharecdn.com/week-5-impression-management-1003312209...
LIKE CULT LEADERS THEY AMASS
LOYAL FOLLOWERS OR “ENABLERS”
http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2015-11-18-1447861833-1859311-...
COVERTS SEND
OUT THEIR
ENABLERS OR
“FLYING
MONKEYS”
AT EVERY
OPPORTUNITY
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NIPa7jOq694/hqdefault.jpg
...
COVERTS MUST CONTROL
THEIR VICTIM’S ENTIRE WORLD
CONTROL
- Friendships
- Family members
- Finances
- Identity
- Workplace
...
THEY USE BLAME, SHAME + PROJECTION
VICTIMS ARE TOLD THEY ARE ALWAYS WRONG
Always insist that
“the victim is the
problem”.
...
SHUT DOWN THEIR VICTIM’S IDENTITY
Do not allow:
Thoughts
Feelings
Needs or wants
Desires
Opinions
Beliefs
Ideas
Values
Int...
DISMISS, IGNORE OR OBLITERATE
BASIC HUMAN EMOTIONAL NEEDS
https://pjadallah.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/basichumanneeds-co...
COVERT
NARCISSISTIC
ABUSE
LEADS TO
EMOTIONAL
SHUTDOWN https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/97/e5f2/97e5f24abf891920e7...
COVERTS
IMITATE
CARING
THEY
FEIGN
EMPATHY
https://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/053eb82eebbaf8f
88978293e30e5cdbf861d12-v5-wm....
IF ACCUSED COVERT NARCS
PROTEST THEIR INNOCENCE
http://s1296.photobucket.com/user/Meahri66/media/innocent_zpseca351d1.jpg....
LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY
LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY
http://www.superiorsilkscreen.com/1184-1244-thickbox/lie-deny-counter-...
LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY
LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/fe/18/f1/fe18f17651503c323e9...
COVERT NARCISSISTS
NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
https://psychopathresistance.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/yourfault2.png?w=584
THEY HAVE PERFECTED “THE SMIRK”
https://t5.rbxcdn.com/bf58ec114ca822d30b4a6732824f2089
IGNORE ALL SIGNS OF COMPLEX
POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
https://cptsd.help/assets/images/cptsd-brain.jpg
COVERTS IGNORE ALL SIGNS OF
C-PTSD IN THEIR VICTIMS
HYPERVIGILENCE CRIPPLING ANXIETY
http://www.lastwordonnothing.com/wp-c...
PROLONGED COMPLEX PTSD CAN KILL
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_zO7E0wkpor4/TBPsMdcjtFI/AAAAAAAAB_I/97UrnzODRGk/s1600/589a46cf-1...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS USE
SLANDER IN THE GUISE OF CONCERN
Smear Campaigns
False accusations
Scapegoating
Shaming
Gos...
http://religionnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Excommunication.jpg
Attain trust,
respect and
belief of all
those close...
COVERT NARCS REVERSE ROLES AND
PRETEND TO BE THE VICTIM
http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/e35/12063009_11898039...
THEY ELICIT SYMPATHY AT ALL TIMES
FROM THEIR ENABLERS AND OTHERS
http://brentbourgeois.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/Poor...
YET COVERT NARCISSIST ABUSERS
NEVER SEEK PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP
The real victim will search for help because
they can’t stand ...
SO, WHERE WILL THEY FIND THEIR NEXT
BATCH OF POTENTIAL VICTIMS?
In waiting rooms around the world!
Family Doctors
Psychiat...
https://narcbaitdiary.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/image4.jpg
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/ef/f7/ec/eff7ecf83907a266e582746c6b4ab34b.jpg
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE
THE SILENT KILLER
http://www.apa.org/Images/death-title-image_tcm7-187855.jpg
PLEASE SHARE THESE OTHER LINKS ON
NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER
http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/red-flags-to-narc...
COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE
THE PERFECT MURDER?
http://www.freexero.com/asseenontv/fullsize/massgrave%201k.jpg
How to get away with murder a slideshare on covert narcissistic abuse by jeni mawter
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How to get away with murder a slideshare on covert narcissistic abuse by jeni mawter

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Covert Narcissistic Abuse is an insidious form of prolonged abuse that targets a person's psyche or soul. Often not recognised as abuse by either the target victim or others it corrodes the person's sense of Self to the point where they feel like they're going crazy. They have no idea they are in a war zone with a designated enemy or enemies. Using subtle, or covert tools of manipulation, oppression, mind-control and denigration the target victim shuts down emotionally, cognitively, socially and physically till all that is left is a husk of their former Self. The end result can be viewed as murder - suicide, homicide, soul murder, spirit murder, mind murder and emotions murder. Covert Narcissistic Abuse by people with Covert Narcissistic Personality is still not recognized by the medical fraternity. Psychiatrists, Psychologists and General Practitioners are ill-educated about Narcissistic Personality Disorders and their toxic fall-out. Knowledge about Overt NPD is improving as more and more targets, or victims, raise its profile in the social media space. However, Covert NPD remains 'off the radar' of society's conscious reeking uninterrupted havoc to families and communities. If this Slideshare resonates with you please like and share with others. Thank you.

Published in: Health & Medicine
  • Very good compilation of covert narcissistic tactics. I know them all too well. I am lucky, I escaped and am still alive and sane in spite of his every effort to destroy me. He has done so much damage to our young adult children, though and severely alienated me from them in his sick efforts to destroy our bond to hurt me in the worst way possible with no thought of what he is doing to them. Has done a good job of isolating and scapegoating me when he couldn't cause my death that he tried so hard to do. I know exactly who he is and the monster he is and will never stop trying to expose him.
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How to get away with murder a slideshare on covert narcissistic abuse by jeni mawter

  1. 1. HOW TO “GET AWAY WITH MURDER” HTTP://IMAGES.CATCHNEWS.COM/UPLOADS/IMAGES/2015/07/06/VYAPAM-MURDER-TOLL-LEAD.JPG COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE COMPILED BY JENI MAWTER
  2. 2. HUMANS ARE COMPLEX CREATURES CAPABLE OF ACTS OF GREAT EMPATHY http://www.spring.org.uk/images/empathy-1.jpg http://agilitrix.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/Empathy-Four-Elements.jpg
  3. 3. BUT THEY ARE ALSO CAPABLE OF ACTS OF GREAT CRUELTY EVEN MURDER Huma http://www.christopherteh.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/race_exhibit1.jpg
  4. 4. WHY IS COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE SO DEADLY? https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OWHyRudb6RE/maxresdefault.jpg
  5. 5. PROLONGED COVERT ABUSE CAN END WITH HOMICIDE http://acdn.newshunt.com/fetchdata7/20160408/asianage/headines/images/800x480_IMAGE51820230.jpg
  6. 6. PROLONGED COVERT ABUSE CAN END WITH SUICIDE http://images.medicaldaily.com/sites/medicaldaily.com/files/styles/headline/public/2015/03/09/rural-isolation.jpg
  7. 7. PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR SPIRIT https://www.smashingmagazine.com/2009/03/30-beautiful-surreal-and-dark-art-pictures/
  8. 8. PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR MIND http://pixelnase.deviantart.com/art/Flying-Brain-70830224
  9. 9. PROLONGED COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE CAN MURDER YOUR SOUL http://na.square-enix.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/post-image/image_gallery/581/fc6fb5d69910ec49eeea3ce5cf897b29.jpg
  10. 10. ON THE SURFACE WE SHARE THE SAME HUMAN CONDITION
  11. 11. OUR WELLNESS RELIES ON OUR BODY, MIND, SPIRIT + EMOTIONS http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-zG0q_aDDd48/UJBrG5LqN0I/AAAAAAAAAIs/RIf5pRA1H58/s1600/SpiritSoulBody-3(houseofmyrrh.com).png
  12. 12. FROM "WELLNESS," BY BRIAN LUKE SEAWARD, PH.D., P. 29 IN THE ILLUSTRATED ENCYCLOPEDIA OF BODY-MIND DISCIPLINE, EDITED BY NANCY ALLISON TAYLOR & FRANCIS, 1999 BODY: Physical well-being is defined as the optimal condition of each of the body's physiological systems. These include pulmonary, cardiovascular, nervous, immune, reproductive, urinary, endocrine, musculoskeletal, and digestive. MIND: Mental well-being is understood as the ability to gather, process, recall and communicate information. SPIRIT/SOUL: Spiritual well-being is defined as the maturation of higher consciousness as developed through the dynamic integration of three facets: relationships (internal, how you relate to yourself and a higher power, however you conceive this to be; and external, how you relate and interact with all people in your life), a personal value system, and a meaningful purpose in life. EMOTIONS: Emotional well-being is best defined as the ability to feel and express the entire range of human emotions from anger to love, and to control them, not be controlled by them.
  13. 13. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ATTACKS BODY, MIND, SPIRIT AND SOUL https://psychologicanarchist.files.wordpress.com/2016/03/dark-horror-art1.jpg?w=620
  14. 14. WHAT IS COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE? To begin with … "Forget what you think you know about narcissism.” Richard Grannon http://spartanlifecoach.com/covert-narcissistic-abuse-unmasked/
  15. 15. MYTHS THAT DON’T APPLY TO COVERT NARCISSISTS You are Told: Narcissists are always brash, loud, assertive, flashy and confident. The problem is: Coverts are quiet, insecure and passive. You are Told: Narcissists will never apologize for things they do. The problem is: Coverts can learn that a quick and TOTAL apology is a really slick way of getting their target to "go back to sleep" if it looks like they are waking up. Richard Grannon http://spartanlifecoach.com/covert-narcissistic-abuse-unmasked/
  16. 16. MYTHS THAT DON’T APPLY TO COVERT NARCISSISTS You are told: Narcissists are ambitious, successful, go- getters full of energy and pumped with charismatic charm. The problem is: Coverts are marked by failed ambition, chronic feelings of emptiness, fragility, low functioning and when depleted can frequently sink into outright depression. You are told: Narcissists can be detected because they will always tell you how amazing they are and by bragging about their achievements. The problem is: Coverts are known for presenting themselves as vulnerable victims who can even use that vulnerability as a hook to bait you in! Richard Grannon http://spartanlifecoach.com/covert-narcissistic-abuse-unmasked/
  17. 17. SO, WHAT IS COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE? Covert narcissism is a more discrete form of narcissism displayed by a person with a more shy and reserved personality. It is characterized by grandiose fantasies and thoughts, a perception of entitlement, and a general sentiment of being better than others. Covert narcissism is typically expressed in a more passive and indirect manner than overt narcissism; it is conveyed with a condescending attitude, insincerity, passive aggressiveness, defensiveness, and hostility. http://study.com/academy/lesson/what-is-covert- narcissism.html
  18. 18. IN THE GRAND SCHEME OF LIFE THIS ALL SOUNDS PRETTY TAME! To understand how lethal covert narcissistic abuse can be we can use the “Boiling Frog” metaphor. Image from https://i.ytimg.com/vi/i648ygPzX3Y/maxresdefault.jpg
  19. 19. A METAPHOR: “THE BOILING FROG” FROM THE STORY OF B, BY DANIEL QUINN BANTAM PUBLISHING 1996 If you drop a frog in a pot of boiling water, it will of course frantically try to clamber out. But if you place it gently in a pot of tepid water and turn the heat on low, it will float there quite placidly. As the water gradually heats up, the frog will sink into a tranquil stupor, exactly like one of us in a hot bath, and before long, with a smile on its face, it will unresistingly allow itself to be boiled to death. Image from http://4.bp.blogspot.com/- xvlaDzP0keU/Vj4Bl2cnqpI/AAAAAAAAAHY/9m11Ne8Ob60/s1600/FrogBoiling.jpg
  20. 20. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE IS PERNICIOUS ABUSE It is outside the victim’s and other’s awareness It occurs behind the scenes It is unrecognized and unquestioned It is insidious When the victim protests they are met with wrath or rage The victim wonders ‘Is it me?’ and ‘Am I crazy?’ When the victim realizes they are trapped and need to escape they no longer have the resources to do so (identity, family and friends, finances, self-esteem, mental/emotional exhaustion) Prolonged abuse is subliminal, occurring over 10,20,30 years Over this time the victim has been invalidated, devalued, denigrated, dehumanized, alienated, intimidated, objectified
  21. 21. THE PERNICIOUS ABUSE GOES UNRECOGNIZED AND UNQUESTIONED http://orig12.deviantart.net/eaae/f/2010/215/0/c/__violent_love_by_nonnetta.jpg
  22. 22. COVERT NARCISSISTS EMPLOY THESE SUBTLE WEAPONS OF ABUSE Disregard all valid requests Sarcasm Neglect Emotional abandonment Selective memory/amnesia Tunnel vision Denial of apologies Denial of compliments Denial of achievements Set up ‘No Win’ situations False accusations ‘Liar!’ Excuses ‘No Win’ http://www.liveluvcreate.com/index.php?site=image&id=502095
  23. 23. COVERT NARCISSISTS EMPLOY THESE SUBTLE WEAPONS OF ABUSE (CON’T) “NARC SPEAK” https://robertmgoldstein.files.wordpress.com/2016/03/how-to-spot-a-narcississts-word-salad.jpg?w=924
  24. 24. SO, HOW DO COVERT NARCISSISTS GET AWAY WITH MURDER? They implement identical Execution Tactics Let’s look at these in more detail … https://cdn.slidesharecdn.com/ss_thumbnails/strategyexecution-110625204548-phpapp01-thumbnail-3.jpg
  25. 25. THEY CHOOSE THEIR TARGETS CAREFULLY Sensitive Empathetic Kind Trusting Likes to help others Honest Loving Curious Friendly Aspiring https://assets.entrepreneur.com/content/16x9/822/1406578312-big- organizational-challenges-can-be-overcome-transparency.jpg
  26. 26. PREFERABLY PEOPLE SECURE CHILDHOOD ATTACHMENTS https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ngJ1Iwi85FI/maxresdefault.jpg
  27. 27. THEY TEST TO ENSURE THE TARGET IS KIND, CARING AND EMPATHETIC http://www.idontstink.com/images/kindness_challenge_page.jpg
  28. 28. A GOOD SOB STORY WORKS WONDERS! http://orig06.deviantart.net/e896/f/2011/220/c/8/sob_story_by_euphreana-d45vvt3.jpg
  29. 29. COVERTS MIRROR THEIR TARGET’S NEEDS, DESIRES, VALUES AND FEARS ALWAYS WEAR A MASK https://usercontent2.hubstatic.com/12115871_f520.jpg
  30. 30. CONVINCE THEM THEY ARE THEIR SOUL MATE https://avalancheofthesoul.files.wordpress.com/2014/05/lovebomb.jpg https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/7f/ a0/41/7fa04193e690ffd43aa5d53346cc36a1.jpg
  31. 31. COVERT NARCISSISTS PRETEND TO BE THE NICEST, MOST CARING, KIND, GENEROUS, TRUSTWORTHIEST PERSON ON THE PLANET http://www.shanty-2-chic.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/Worlds-Greatest-Name-Tag-Labels.gif
  32. 32. ONCE THE VICTIM IS HOOKED THE COVERTS TAKE THEIR TIME ABUSE IS SUBLIMINAL Months … Years … Decades work best! subliminal səˈblɪmɪn(ə)l/ Adjective PSYCHOLOGY adjective: subliminal (of a stimulus or mental process) below the threshold of sensation or consciousness; perceived by or affecting someone's mind without their being aware of it
  33. 33. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS USE “WHITE ANTING” White anting refers to the action or process of bringing down (a person) from within: undermining, sabotage. It is a pattern of behavior occurring over long periods of time. Systematic Diminishment of Another
  34. 34. WHITE ANTING CAN BE LETHAL https://erininjuba.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/ants-go-marching3.png
  35. 35. COVERT ABUSERS GRADUALLY EMPLOY CONTROL AND MANIPULATION TACTICS USUALLY “BEHIND THE SCENES” Devalue, denigrate, dehumanize http://www.cscaa.com/images_dvip/loveshouldnthurt.jpg
  36. 36. THEY SET UP “NO WIN” SITUATIONS Impossible to please Damned if you do/don’t Blame shifting Circular conversations Projections Selective amnesia Silent treatment Baiting Narcissistic Rage Switching topics https://clisanti.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/slaughter-house.jpg
  37. 37. USE ‘ALWAYS’ AND ‘NEVER’ STATEMENTS THAT ARE RARELY TRUE “I never get affection.” “I always give into you.” “You never listen.” “That’s right… It’s always my fault.” https://hopelesslyfunny.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/always-right-never-wrong.jpg
  38. 38. COVERTS ABUSE INTERMITTENTLY THIS PATTERN IS REPEATED OVER TIME Abuse for short burst. Behave normally. Repeat episode of mistreatment. Behave normally. Hoover if you have to. Pretend to care. Repeat. Abuse for short burst. Behave normally. Repeat episode of mistreatment. Behave normally. Hoover if you have to. Pretend to care. Repeat.
  39. 39. https://emma75love.files.wordpress.com/2015/10/narc-cycle.jpg
  40. 40. THE SILENT TREATMENT IS A SANITIZED VERSION OF MURDER http://rickthomas.net/weekend-shorts-silent-treatment-is-the-sanitized-version-of-murder/
  41. 41. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS VIOLATE ALL BOUNDARIES http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Tpn4sqyBHlE/T_sTexBRn9I/AAAAAAAAAjM/mzgPsU2c098/s1600/Relationship+Chart.jpg
  42. 42. http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rHA_i9rTwGY/TxgKQV4dCXI/AAAAAAAAA7Q/KnWYfFMb7Lw/s1600/gaslight6.png ‘GASLIGHTING’ IS WEAPON OF CHOICE FOR COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE VICTIMS THEN THINK THEY’RE CRAZY
  43. 43. ‘… GASLIGHTING, ESPECIALLY IF IT IS REPETITIVE, CAN PRECIPITATE A WIDE RANGE OF PSYCHIATRIC DISORDERS, UP TO AND INCLUDING PSYCHOSIS AND SUICIDE BEHAVIOR BY THE VICTIMS.’ QUOTE BY DR THEODORE LDORPAT, CRIMES OF PUNISHMENT: AMERICA'S CULTURE OF VIOLENCE, ALGORA PUBLISHING, 2007, P 180
  44. 44. GASLIGHTING http://queenbeeing.com/twisted-toxic-love-inside-the-distorted-mind-of-a-narcisssist/
  45. 45. SOME GASLIGHTING TECHNIQUES TAKEN FROM THE NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE WWW.HOTLINE.ORG Withholding: the abusive partner pretends not to understand or refuses to listen. “I don’t want to hear this again,” or “You’re trying to confuse me.” Countering: the abusive partner questions the victim’s memory of events, even when the victim remembers them accurately. “You’re wrong, you never remember things correctly.” Blocking/Diverting: the abusive partner changes the subject and/or questions the victim’s thoughts. “Is that another crazy idea you got from [friend/family member]?” or “You’re imagining things.” Trivializing: the abusive partner makes the victim’s needs or feelings seem unimportant. Ex. “You’re going to get angry over a little thing like that?” or “You’re too sensitive.” Forgetting/Denial: the abusive partner pretends to have forgotten what actually occurred or denies things like promises made to the victim. Ex. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” or “You’re just making stuff up.”
  46. 46. GASLIGHTING DESTROYS THEIR TARGET’S REALITY https://jackbrummet.blogspot.com.au/2009_05_01_archive.html
  47. 47. COVERT ABUSERS EXPAND THEIR “REACH” AND “INFLUENCE” http://image.slidesharecdn.com/week-5-impression-management-100331220909-phpapp01/95/week-5-impression-management-15-728.jpg?cb=1270073881
  48. 48. LIKE CULT LEADERS THEY AMASS LOYAL FOLLOWERS OR “ENABLERS” http://images.huffingtonpost.com/2015-11-18-1447861833-1859311-peoplestempleblackwoman.jpg
  49. 49. COVERTS SEND OUT THEIR ENABLERS OR “FLYING MONKEYS” AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NIPa7jOq694/hqdefault.jpg flying monkey In popular psychology, a flying monkey is someone who does the narcissist’s bidding to inflict additional torment to the narcissist's victim. It might consists of spying on the victim, spreading gossip, threatening, painting the narcissist as the victim and their target as the perpetrator. Despite this, the narcissist does not hesitate to make flying monkeys their scapegoats when and if needed. The narcissist might send siblings as flying monkeys to badger the adult child back. #narcissism #narcissist #narcissists #flying monkey #flying monkeys by Narcissistic Notes Fb page April 15, 2014
  50. 50. COVERTS MUST CONTROL THEIR VICTIM’S ENTIRE WORLD CONTROL - Friendships - Family members - Finances - Identity - Workplace http://2.bp.blogspot.com/- TUW1eWC8G6A/U1byYuXG3eI/AAAAAAAAAvI/k6XtqmFyFa8/s1600/Triangulation+-
  51. 51. THEY USE BLAME, SHAME + PROJECTION VICTIMS ARE TOLD THEY ARE ALWAYS WRONG Always insist that “the victim is the problem”. The victim knows something is terribly wrong but they can’t figure out what. Because the abuse is difficult to perceive the victim will think “It must be me.” http://www.explodingdog.com/dumbpict51/iamnotcrazy.g if
  52. 52. SHUT DOWN THEIR VICTIM’S IDENTITY Do not allow: Thoughts Feelings Needs or wants Desires Opinions Beliefs Ideas Values Interests Goals https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/54/06/5e/54065ef5c6b11a409c0e0864fe43da10.jpg
  53. 53. DISMISS, IGNORE OR OBLITERATE BASIC HUMAN EMOTIONAL NEEDS https://pjadallah.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/basichumanneeds-copy-1.jpg
  54. 54. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE LEADS TO EMOTIONAL SHUTDOWN https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/97/e5f2/97e5f24abf891920e7550c68b4b2de3d.jpg
  55. 55. COVERTS IMITATE CARING THEY FEIGN EMPATHY https://cdn-webimages.wimages.net/053eb82eebbaf8f 88978293e30e5cdbf861d12-v5-wm.jpg?v=0
  56. 56. IF ACCUSED COVERT NARCS PROTEST THEIR INNOCENCE http://s1296.photobucket.com/user/Meahri66/media/innocent_zpseca351d1.jpg.html
  57. 57. LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY http://www.superiorsilkscreen.com/1184-1244-thickbox/lie-deny-counter-accuse-and-act-innocent.jpg
  58. 58. LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY LIE AND DENY https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/fe/18/f1/fe18f17651503c323e9a100e591e65fb.jpg
  59. 59. COVERT NARCISSISTS NEVER TAKE RESPONSIBILITY https://psychopathresistance.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/yourfault2.png?w=584
  60. 60. THEY HAVE PERFECTED “THE SMIRK” https://t5.rbxcdn.com/bf58ec114ca822d30b4a6732824f2089
  61. 61. IGNORE ALL SIGNS OF COMPLEX POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER https://cptsd.help/assets/images/cptsd-brain.jpg
  62. 62. COVERTS IGNORE ALL SIGNS OF C-PTSD IN THEIR VICTIMS HYPERVIGILENCE CRIPPLING ANXIETY http://www.lastwordonnothing.com/wp-content/uploads/ 2013/07/shutterstock_startle-300x300.jpg https://tommyboland.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/white_knuckles.jpg
  63. 63. PROLONGED COMPLEX PTSD CAN KILL http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_zO7E0wkpor4/TBPsMdcjtFI/AAAAAAAAB_I/97UrnzODRGk/s1600/589a46cf-1.jpg
  64. 64. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSERS USE SLANDER IN THE GUISE OF CONCERN Smear Campaigns False accusations Scapegoating Shaming Gossip https://www.brainyquote.com/photos_tr/en/g/grouchomarx/125514/grou chomarx1.jpg
  65. 65. http://religionnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/Excommunication.jpg Attain trust, respect and belief of all those close to the target victim so that no-one believes them. This way victims suffer alone. COVERTS DO WHATEVER IS NECESSARY TO ENSURE THE VICTIM SUFFERS ALONE
  66. 66. COVERT NARCS REVERSE ROLES AND PRETEND TO BE THE VICTIM http://scontent.cdninstagram.com/t51.2885-15/e35/12063009_118980391797121_201869972_n.jpg?ig_cache_key=MTExMDg4MDQ3NzMyMTUyMzc1OA%3D%3D.2
  67. 67. THEY ELICIT SYMPATHY AT ALL TIMES FROM THEIR ENABLERS AND OTHERS http://brentbourgeois.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/Poor-Me.jpg
  68. 68. YET COVERT NARCISSIST ABUSERS NEVER SEEK PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP The real victim will search for help because they can’t stand their suffering. The Covert-Narcissist-Playing-the-Victim will just tell others about their suffering and never search for psychological help. Why would they? They were never abused! They’re NOT in pain. They’re too busy looking for their next source of Narcissistic Supply.
  69. 69. SO, WHERE WILL THEY FIND THEIR NEXT BATCH OF POTENTIAL VICTIMS? In waiting rooms around the world! Family Doctors Psychiatrists Psychologists Trauma Centers Pharmacies Looking for those diagnosed with Anxiety Depression C- PTSD Stroke Heart Attacks http://img12.deviantart.net/ aa9c/i/2014/298/b/c/ pills_by_lora_zombie-d842e9v.png
  70. 70. https://narcbaitdiary.files.wordpress.com/2015/02/image4.jpg
  71. 71. https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/ef/f7/ec/eff7ecf83907a266e582746c6b4ab34b.jpg
  72. 72. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE THE SILENT KILLER http://www.apa.org/Images/death-title-image_tcm7-187855.jpg
  73. 73. PLEASE SHARE THESE OTHER LINKS ON NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/red-flags-to-narcissistic- personality-disorder-compiled-by-jeni-mawter http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/narcissistic-victim-syndrome-a- powerpoint-by-jeni-mawter http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/moving-on-from-narcissistic- abuse-due-to-narcissistic-personality-disorder-npd-compiled-by-jeni- mawter http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/verbal-abuse-and-the-narcissist- communication-tactics-designed-to-make-you-crazy http://www.slideshare.net/jenimawter/why-cant-i-move-on- narcissistic-abuse-a-complex-trauma-compiled-by-jeni-mawter
  74. 74. COVERT NARCISSISTIC ABUSE THE PERFECT MURDER? http://www.freexero.com/asseenontv/fullsize/massgrave%201k.jpg

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