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08 John Metta: How to creatively destroy pesky, non-moneymaking community efforts

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Many people in Portland are involved in technology start-ups or other potential money making opportunities. One problem PDXers face is that their sense of community involvement often forces them to partake in non-moneymaking side projects that distract them from the steps necessary to build a billion dollar corporation capable of properly achieving world domination. Using my wealth of experiences with efforts such as SPARK, ORBlogs.org and Engage The Gorge, I will present some creative ways in which I have catastrophically destroyed community-based efforts. Learning from my successes, you will finally be able to ditch that pesky time sink and focus your full attention on your plans for world domination.

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08 John Metta: How to creatively destroy pesky, non-moneymaking community efforts

  1. 1. World Domination and You! How to creatively destroy pesky, non-moneymaking community efforts A Motivational Process in 137 steps John (The Mettadore) Metta, CEO of WorDomInd, Inc.
  2. 2. Step 1: Buy My Book, Dammit! Learn about WorDomInd! ● Lots of Graphs & Charts! ● Comes with Microsoft ● Domination (oem edition) Lots of Charts & Graphs! ●
  3. 3. Step 1: Buy My Book, Dammit! Learn about WorDomInd! ● Lots of Graphs & Charts! ● Comes with Microsoft ● Domination (oem edition) Lots of Charts & Graphs! ●
  4. 4. Portland, we have a problem. Lots of smart people ● Most of them are ● stupid Misguided sense of ● purpose Can I just ask what the hell this is?
  5. 5. Portland, we have a problem. Wasting time by ● “Helping people” Too chicken to say ● “Screw you!” Some are just big fat ● cry babies I mean, is it some kind of maze?
  6. 6. Save the World (by Dominating It) Intuitively Obvious ● Nice People Suck ● Rampant Greed FTW! ● Why the hell would they put it on a slide?
  7. 7. Save the World (by Dominating It) Intuitively Obvious ● Nice People Suck ● Rampant Greed FTW! ● Why the hell would they put it on a slide?
  8. 8. GRMFWKLSNAXP!
  9. 9. GRMFWKLSNAXP!
  10. 10. Tell me, John, Tell me about GRMFWKLSNAXP! TANSTAAFL, BABY! ➲ Buy the book, Dammit! ➲ Learn the 137 step program ➲ Okay, maybe I'll tell you “a little baby bit” ➲ There it is again! It was gone in the last slide!
  11. 11. Tell me, John, Tell me about GRMFWKLSNAXP! TANSTAAFL, BABY! ➲ Buy the book, Dammit! ➲ Learn the 137 step program ➲ Okay, maybe I'll tell you “a little baby bit” ➲ There it is again! It was gone in the last slide!
  12. 12. 3 From GRMFWKLSNAXP Greed (If you don't make money, you don't ➲ make any money!) Role Model (No more flyin' solo!) ➲ Men-- Yes, men! Because women get stuff ➲ done! Mind you, this is a stock image, I didn't make it.
  13. 13. 3 From GRMFWKLSNAXP Greed (If you don't make money, you don't ➲ make any money!) Role Model (No more flyin' solo!) ➲ Men-- Yes, men! Because women get stuff ➲ done! Mind you, this is a stock image, I didn't make it.
  14. 14. Not This Chick!! Mother Teresa? ➲ Wasted time helping ➲ people A Woman (got stuff done) ➲ Is there some importance to mazes in corporate life?
  15. 15. You want to be a Dick Like maybe it's supposed to be an analogy?
  16. 16. You want to be a Dick Like maybe it's supposed to be an analogy?
  17. 17. A Few Moronic Men Getting stuff done? ➲ WWDD? ➲ Shoot him in the face ➲ Or is it a simile? I always confuse those two.
  18. 18. A Few Moronic Men Getting stuff done? ➲ WWDD? ➲ Shoot him in the face ➲ Or is it a simile? I always confuse those two.
  19. 19. The Big Finish Lots of smart people, but nice people suck ➲ Wasting time smelling poor people's feet? ➲ Buy my book! Right Now! ➲ Think GRMFWKLSNAXP! ➲ Shoot doers in the face with a shotgun ➲ Rule the world! ➲ I had to write a simile once in English class. Something about life being like a box of chocolates. Wait, is that metaphor?
  20. 20. How to creatively destroy those pesky non-money making community based efforts John Metta http://positorio.us @Mettadore on Twitter and Identi.ca mettadore@positorio.us 3rd left turn after the 4th right turn if you enter from the SE side of this maze of a city (that's a simile, right?)

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