Become More Assertive


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Conflict and Stress Management Training

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Become More Assertive

  1. 1. Become More Assertive Bandung, 22 - 23 Desember 2009 By : Kanaidi, SE., M.Si [email_address]
  2. 2. <ul><ul><li>Covey (1990) in The Seven Habits of Highly Successful People refers to the scarcity mentality versus the abundance mentality. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>The scarcity mentality leads us to resent the success of others. </li></ul></ul></ul><ul><ul><ul><li>The abundance mentality allows us to think of situations in which everybody can win. </li></ul></ul></ul>Toward Conflict Management
  3. 3. <ul><li>Conflict management is defined as “the opportunity to improve situations and strengthen relationships” (BCS, 2004). </li></ul><ul><li>– proactive conflict management </li></ul><ul><li>– collaborative conflict management </li></ul><ul><li>Managing conflict means you need to develop several styles and decide which is valuable at any given point of conflict </li></ul>Toward Conflict Management
  4. 4. Toward Conflict Management <ul><li>Borisoff and Victor (1998) argue that the best strategy for conflict management (negotiation) depends on the desired outcome. </li></ul><ul><li>Fisher, Ury, and Patton (1991) outline four principles that compose principled negotiation . </li></ul><ul><ul><li>Separate the people from the problem. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Focus on interests, not positions. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Invent options for mutual gain. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li>Seek objective criteria. </li></ul></ul>
  5. 5. Desirability of Conflict <ul><li>Conflict can be desirable. </li></ul><ul><li>Conflict helps eliminate or reduce the likelihood of groupthink. </li></ul><ul><li>A moderate level of conflict across tasks within a group resulted in increased group performance while conflict among personalities resulted in lower group performance (Peterson and Behfar, 2003) </li></ul>
  6. 6. Review of the Systems Approach <ul><li>Individuals should understand their own personal triggers to better deal with conflict situations in the workplace (Robin, 2004) </li></ul><ul><li>Group members should think about other group members early on to identify privately those individuals and behaviors that may push their buttons. </li></ul>
  7. 7. <ul><li>Conflict may have some desirable consequences. </li></ul><ul><li>Out of control conflict may be destructive. </li></ul><ul><li>Conflict-producing behaviors are more likely from those high in aggression, dominance, and the need for autonomy. </li></ul><ul><li>An important factor related to conflict is the style of leadership and the resulting group norms regarding conflict. </li></ul>Review of the Systems Approach
  8. 8. How to prevent conflicts <ul><li>Frequent meeting of your team </li></ul><ul><li>Allow your team to express openly </li></ul><ul><li>Sharing objectives </li></ul><ul><li>Having a clear and detailed job description </li></ul><ul><li>Distributing task fairly </li></ul><ul><li>Never criticize team members publicly </li></ul><ul><li>Always be fair and just with your team </li></ul><ul><li>Being a role model </li></ul>
  9. 9. Tips for Managing Workplace Conflict <ul><li>Build good relationships before conflict occurs </li></ul><ul><li>Do not let small problems escalate; deal with them as they arise </li></ul><ul><li>Respect differences </li></ul><ul><li>Listen to others’ perspectives on the conflict situation </li></ul><ul><li>Acknowledge feelings before focus s ing on facts </li></ul><ul><li>Focus on solving problems, not changing people </li></ul><ul><li>If you can’t resolve the problem, turn to someone who can help </li></ul><ul><li>Remember to adapt your style to the situation and persons involved </li></ul>
  10. 10. The Five Steps in Resolving Conflict: <ul><li>Pray about the Problem Together </li></ul><ul><li>Clarify the Issues – Focus on the Needs and Goals </li></ul><ul><li>Understand Each Other’s Perspective - Needed Communication Skill </li></ul><ul><li>Break the Conflict into Small Steps </li></ul><ul><li>Give and Take </li></ul>