The Platinum Rule


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The Platinum Rule

  1. 1. The Platinum Rule<br />Gary Rinehart<br />
  2. 2. Agenda<br />Introduction (10 min)<br />Understanding (50 min)<br />Strenths<br />Potential Limitations<br />Tendencies<br />Team Activity (30 min)<br />Understanding communication and working styles of others<br />Sharing “Likes” & “Dislikes” when communicating<br />Effective Communication (30 min)<br />Do’s and Don’ts when communicating with each profile<br />Success Insights Wheel (30 min)<br />Understanding our strengths as a team<br />Understanding our potential limitations as a team<br />
  3. 3. Content<br />Communication<br />Perception<br />Personality Styles<br />Personality Ranges<br />Detailed breakdown<br />Relationship problems<br />Versatility<br />
  4. 4. Purpose & Objectives<br />Understand different communication styles in our team<br />Find ways to more effectively communicate across different communication/work styles<br />Build stronger relationship with the team<br />
  5. 5. Ground Rules<br />Be open-minded<br />Participate actively<br />Confidentiality – What is said in the room stays in the room<br />Focus on the topic at hand<br />Respect the opinions and input of others<br />Listen to each other<br />Learn about others and YOURSELF<br />Any Others?<br />
  6. 6. Why am I interested in this stuff?<br />Interesting seminars<br />Interest in understanding other’s motivations<br />Found that in making a presentation you have the opportunity to exchange ideas<br />Communicate<br />Problems in communication and organization<br />
  7. 7. The Rules<br />Golden Rule“Do for others what you want them to do for you”<br />Platinum Rule“Do for others what they want done to them”<br />
  8. 8. Meaning of any Word<br />Meaning of any word cannot be completely understood until it is placed in context in the total framework within which a communication takes place<br />Instead of hearing what people say, we hear what our minds tell us they say that might be something totally different.<br />Words do not have the same meaning for different people<br />
  9. 9. Feedback<br />Single most important method of improving communication<br />Cannot have proper feedback until you understand yourself and the person you are trying to communicate with.<br />Communication is a process of people relating to other people.<br />
  10. 10. Communication<br />75% of day spent in:<br />Speech<br />Writing<br />Reading<br />Listening<br />Nonverbal communication<br />Memory<br />
  11. 11. Communication<br />The process of passing information from one person to another<br />Effective Communication<br />Must be understood<br />Must be believed<br />Must be accepted<br />Breakdown in Communication<br />Inability to convey meaning as well as words<br />Inability to perceive or have empathy<br />
  12. 12. Verbal Communication<br />7% words<br />38% tone<br />55% all other<br />
  13. 13. Johari’s Window<br /><ul><li>Unconscious Self
  14. 14. Role We Play</li></ul>Conscience Self<br />Role Others See<br />
  15. 15. Perception<br />Perception<br />What we see<br />Attitude<br />What we think about what we see<br />Every person has a perception of reality based upon<br />Personal wants<br />Past experience<br />Physiological Structure<br />Physical and social environment<br />
  16. 16. Selective Perception<br />We are selective about what we choose to perceive at any given time<br />In order not to hear or see something, we must first:<br />Hear or see it<br />Recognize it<br />Reject it<br />Almost Simultaneously<br />
  17. 17. Perception of Environment<br />Behavior determined by perception of environment<br />Halo effect<br />Projection<br />
  18. 18. Through understanding the nature of man as a rationalizing animal, we can begin to learn both about ourselves and our associates.<br />One step in understanding is classifying our personalities.<br />
  19. 19. What are we talking about?<br />It is a style assessment tool – not a skill assessment<br />A tool that analyzes the behavioral style<br />Manner of solving problems and challenges<br />Ability to influence and work with others<br />Ability to work in a rapid dynamic environment<br />Manage information and structure<br />The categories are . . . Driver, Analytic, Amiable, and Expressive<br />Helps individuals understand how they project themselves to different people in different situations<br />Assists team members in developing strategies to meet the needs of the role, culture and people<br />The results noted on your report are perceptions other people may have of you. Under stress those perceptions may be magnified<br />
  20. 20. Benefits of this type of Assessment<br />Benefits<br />Gain insight regarding preferred styles of communicating<br />Show how to present ideas to someone who has a different style<br />Learn to value & appreciate differences in styles<br />Provide a common vocabulary for team future references<br />Use knowledge to enhance team as well as internal customer relations<br />This is not a test – these is no pass or fail grade<br />There is no ‘good or bad’ – “we need all ‘types’ to get the job done!”<br />The information does not get shared outside of the team setting<br />
  21. 21. Four Basic Personality Styles<br />Driver<br />Expressive<br />Amiable<br />Analytical<br />
  22. 22. 4 Dimensions<br />Facts & Data<br /><ul><li>Driver
  23. 23. Control
  24. 24. Direct Action
  25. 25. Rejects Inaction
  26. 26. Competitive
  27. 27. Ambitious
  28. 28. Analytical
  29. 29. Organized
  30. 30. Cautious
  31. 31. Rejects Involvement
  32. 32. Perfectionist
  33. 33. Precise</li></ul>Platinum Rule is based upon how we do things and where we fit within these major styles.<br />Introvert<br />Extrovert<br />Amiable<br />Steady<br />Relates<br />Supportive<br />Rejects Conflict<br />Patient<br />Relaxed<br />Expressive<br />Persuasive<br />Inspiring<br />Involved<br />Social<br />Rejects Isolation<br />Trusting<br />Relationships<br />
  34. 34. Personality Subtraits<br />Could have subtraits of one of the other types<br />Personality matrix is a 4 x 4 matrix<br />Each main type is again divided into 4 subcategories composed of the same personality traits<br />Analytical<br />Driver<br />Analytical<br />Drive<br />Amiable<br />Expressive<br />Amiable<br />Expressive<br />
  35. 35. Personality Ranges<br />Control<br />Facts<br /><ul><li>Analytical
  36. 36. Technical Specialist
  37. 37. Driver
  38. 38. Control Specialist</li></ul>Ask<br />Tell<br />Slow<br />Fast<br />Amiable<br />Support Specialist<br />Expressive<br />Social Specialist<br />Emotional<br />Feelings<br />
  39. 39. Characteristics of Axis<br />Control<br />Few gestures<br />Cool<br />Distant<br />Poker Faced<br />Facts/Logic Oriented<br />Calm<br />Emotional<br />Many gestures<br />Warm<br />Friendly<br />Smiles<br />Frowns<br />Opinions and Feelings Oriented<br />Excitable<br />Ask<br />Slow Actions<br />Avoid Risks<br />Cooperative<br />Supportive<br />Leans Back<br />Consistent Tone<br />Limited Pressure<br />Tell<br />Fast Action<br />Takes Risks<br />Competitive<br />Challenging<br />Leans Forward<br />Voice Emphasis<br />Presses for Decisions<br />
  40. 40. Analytical<br />Strengths<br />Analyticals tend to:<br />Provides evidence with support<br />Supports thinking principles<br />Accurate – Precise<br />Works carefully<br />Impresses others with knowledge and precision<br />Cooperative<br />Fact Oriented<br /><ul><li>Weaknesses</li></ul>Analyticals may:<br /><ul><li>Lean on team leader or supervisor
  41. 41. Hesitate to act without sufficient facts or precedent – waits to be right
  42. 42. Be bound by organizational procedures and methods – avoids risk
  43. 43. Do the work themselves and not delegate
  44. 44. Yield position of self and team to avoid controversy – extremely cautious and slow
  45. 45. Communication Do’s</li></ul>To influence and form a strong bond with an Analytical you need to include words or phrases such as:<br /><ul><li>Provide information
  46. 46. Help to decide
  47. 47. Be systematic, organized and prepared
  48. 48. Take time to list advantages and disadvantages of proposals
  49. 49. Have viable alternatives for dealings with any disadvantage
  50. 50. Assure after decision
  51. 51. Provide solid, tangible factual evidence
  52. 52. Do not use gimmicks to get a fast decision</li></li></ul><li>Drivers<br />Strengths<br />Drivers tend to:<br />Like challenging assignments<br />Have a strong drive for results<br />Be positive and like confrontation<br />Like power and authority – pushy and domineering<br />Be motivated by direct answers<br />Poor listener<br /><ul><li>Weaknesses</li></ul>Drivers may:<br /><ul><li>Overstep authority within the team
  53. 53. User fear as a motivator
  54. 54. Overextend their ego
  55. 55. Over delegate and under instruct
  56. 56. Make decisions without all of the facts
  57. 57. Communication Do’s</li></ul>To influence and form a strong bond with an Drivers you need to include words or phrases such as:<br /><ul><li>Keep getting the results you want
  58. 58. Being involved in all the important decisions
  59. 59. Lead the pack
  60. 60. Right in line with the direction you are taking
  61. 61. Get people to start listening
  62. 62. Give the driver a choice
  63. 63. Be precise, efficient and well organized
  64. 64. Allow them to draw their own conclusions</li></li></ul><li>Amiable<br />Strengths<br />Amiables tend to:<br />Create an environment where people feel significant<br />Support others in achieving goals<br />Offer understanding and friendship<br />Provides guarantees with assurances<br />Promote and implement team ideas<br />Agreeable (easy going)<br /><ul><li>Weaknesses</li></ul>Amiables may:<br /><ul><li>Be passive and indecisive in certain situations
  65. 65. Be hard to manage
  66. 66. Avoids confrontation within the team
  67. 67. Lack initiative and a sense of urgency
  68. 68. Overuse compassion and kindness
  69. 69. Not challenge the status quo
  70. 70. Communication Do’s</li></ul>To influence and form a strong bond with an Amiables you need to include words or phrases such as:<br /><ul><li>Must provide reach
  71. 71. Good team players
  72. 72. Resolve everyone’s concerns
  73. 73. Probably does a lot more than they get credit for
  74. 74. Relationship-oriented
  75. 75. Achieve consensus
  76. 76. Be confident
  77. 77. Keep risk at the minimum</li></li></ul><li>Expressive<br />Strengths<br />Expressives tend to:<br />Provide testimony with intensity<br />See the “Big Picture” and communicate it.<br />Be people-oriented<br />Bring the team together – excited member of the team<br />Promote the team throughout the organization<br />Work fast<br /><ul><li>Weaknesses</li></ul>Expressives may:<br /><ul><li>Act impulsively based on emotions – can be careless
  78. 78. Be unrealistic in appraising people
  79. 79. Be inattentive to details and disorganized
  80. 80. Listen selectively to team members
  81. 81. Be overly optimistic about team abilities
  82. 82. Must hold self in check
  83. 83. Excitable
  84. 84. “Trust me, life is too short”
  85. 85. Communication Do’s</li></ul>To influence and form a strong bond with an Expressive you need to include words or phrases such as:<br /><ul><li>Use enthusiasm
  86. 86. Gain respect
  87. 87. Builds on what you have already accomplished
  88. 88. New
  89. 89. Unique
  90. 90. Get your point across
  91. 91. Not leader type without calming influence
  92. 92. Move at a rapid but entertaining pace
  93. 93. Make sure details are fully understood</li></li></ul><li>Examples<br />Control<br /><ul><li>Analytical
  94. 94. President Jimmy Carter
  95. 95. Chris Evert
  96. 96. Al Gore
  97. 97. Felix Unger
  98. 98. Mr. Spock (Star Trek)
  99. 99. Lisa Simpson
  100. 100. Driver
  101. 101. President J.F. Kennedy
  102. 102. Barbara Walters
  103. 103. Michael Jordan
  104. 104. Donald Trump
  105. 105. Madonna
  106. 106. Dr. Phil</li></ul>Tell<br />Ask<br />Amiable<br />President Gerald Ford, George W. Bush<br />Michael J. Fox<br />Mahatma Gandhi<br />Fred Rogers<br />Mother Teresa<br />Expressive<br />President Clinton<br />Robin Williams<br />Arnold Palmer<br />Oprah Winfrey<br />Eddie Murphy<br />Sammy Sosa<br />Emotional<br />
  107. 107. Examples - Warranty<br />Control<br /><ul><li>Analytical
  108. 108. Best around because it has been studied to death
  109. 109. Driver
  110. 110. Compares
  111. 111. If it doesn’t work, he’ll break the store</li></ul>Ask<br />Tell<br />Amiable<br />Studies it<br />Sends it in<br />Expressive<br />Didn’t know it existed<br />Emotional<br />
  112. 112. Do opposites ‘attract’?<br />Facts & Data<br /><ul><li>Driver
  113. 113. Control
  114. 114. Direct Action
  115. 115. Rejects Inaction
  116. 116. Competitive
  117. 117. Ambitious
  118. 118. Analytical
  119. 119. Organized
  120. 120. Cautious
  121. 121. Rejects Involvement
  122. 122. Perfectionist
  123. 123. Precise</li></ul>D<br />C<br />Introvert<br />Extrovert<br />Amiable<br />Steady<br />Relates<br />Supportive<br />Rejects Conflict<br />Patient<br />Relaxed<br />Expressive<br />Persuasive<br />Inspiring<br />Involved<br />Social<br />Rejects Isolation<br />Trusting<br />S<br />I<br />Relationships<br />
  124. 124. Relationship Problems<br />Problems of:<br />Pace<br />Driver certainly goes at a different pace from amiable<br />Priority<br />Expressive establishes his/her priorities on principles completely different from analyticals<br />Nobody would get along if each practiced their own style of the Golden Rule<br />
  125. 125. What to do?<br />Must become versatile:<br />Recognize our own tendencies<br />Recognize our counterpart’s traits<br />Try to meet the other person more than halfway<br />
  126. 126. Who is typically more . . .<br />Introverted<br />Tendency not to disclose inward thoughts and emotions through verbal and nonverbal behavior<br />Extroverted<br />Tendency to outwardly demonstrate inward thoughts or emotions through verbal and nonverbal behaviors<br />C<br />S<br />D<br />I<br />
  127. 127. Who is typically more . . .<br />Indirect<br />Tendency to speak using specific qualifying statements to describe the context<br />Direct<br />Tendency to say it bluntly, tersely, or in broad, general succinct statements<br />C<br />S<br />I<br />D<br />
  128. 128. Who is typically more . . .<br />Risk Assessing<br />Tendency to reduce risk by deliberate examination of the alternatives or consequences<br />Risk-Taking<br />Tendency to take big and little risks without much examination of alternatives or consequences<br />C<br />S<br />I<br />D<br />
  129. 129. Who is typically more . . .<br />Continuation-Orientation<br />Tendency to want and promote consistency and familiarity in one’s environment and life routines<br />Change-Oriented<br />Tendency to accept and desire a variety or change in one’s environment and life routines<br />C<br />S<br />I<br />D<br />
  130. 130. Who tends to . . .<br />Control<br />Tendency to act on the environment to change it to meet one’s inner needs<br />Accept<br />Tendency to accept what the environment gives and use what is given to meet one’s inner needs<br />C<br />D<br />I<br />S<br />
  131. 131. Who tends to . . .<br />Fight<br />Tendency to move toward or engage in conflich<br />Flight<br />Tendency to move away or to withdraw from conflict<br />D<br />C<br />I<br />S<br />
  132. 132. Who tends to . . .<br />Judge<br />Tendency to qualify or test ideas and experiences of self and others against preconceived ideas of what “Should” be<br />Perceive<br />Tendency to withhold judgment or to allow for a wider variety of people, places, or things without judgment<br />C<br />D<br />I<br />S<br />
  133. 133. Who tends to . . .<br />Be Pessimistic<br />Tendency to react as if the world is an unfriendly, hostile environment despite information or experiences to the contrary<br />Be Optimistic<br />Tendency to react as if the world is a friendly place despite information or experiences to the contrary<br />C<br />D<br />S<br />I<br />
  134. 134. Handouts<br />Behavior Observation Checklist<br />Evaluate Speaker<br />Could use on spouse, boss, interviewee, enemy<br />Self Evaluation<br />Sheet one at start of class<br />Sheet two at end of class<br />Place evaluation from sheet one in proper quadrant<br />Bottom part describes each quadrant by opposite adjectives<br />
  135. 135. Last Diagram<br />How<br />(Control)<br />Not<br /><ul><li>Analytical
  136. 136. Driver</li></ul>R<br />E<br />S<br />P<br />O<br />N<br />S<br />I<br />V<br />E<br />N<br />E<br />S<br />S<br />Very (Tell)<br />ASSERTIVENESS<br />(Ask) Not<br />Amiable<br />Expressive<br />Very<br />(Emote)<br />Warm, Friendly, Feeling Oriented<br />
  137. 137. Time for a teambuilding . . .<br />Gather in groups (D-I-S-C)<br />As a group answer the following questions<br />What do we like when communicating?<br />What do we dislike when communicating?<br />What other communication styles bug us and why?<br />What bugs us about ourselves?<br />What do we say or do under stress?<br />When we are under stress, we need others to do/say . . .<br />
  138. 138. Communicating with the Driver<br />Be clear, specific to the point<br />Stick to business<br />Come prepared<br />Present facts logically<br />Ask specific questions<br />Provide alternatives and choices for making decisions<br />Provide facts and figures about probability of success or the effectiveness of options<br />If you disagree, take issue with the facts<br />Provide a win-win opportunity<br />Don’t ramble on, or waste their time<br />Don’t forget or lose things<br />Don’t be unprepared or disorganized<br />Don’t come with the decision made<br />
  139. 139. Communicating with the Expressive<br />Plan interaction that supports their dreams and intentions<br />Allow time for relating and socializing<br />Talk to people about their goals<br />Focus on people and action items<br />Put details in writing<br />Ask for their opinion<br />Provide ideas for implementing action<br />Use enough time to be stimulating, fun, fast moving<br />Provide testimonials from people they see as important or prominent<br />Offer special, immediate and incentives for their willing to take risks<br />Don’t be curt<br />Don’t drive to facts, figures and alternatives<br />Don’t leave decisions up in the air<br />Don’t be impersonal<br />Don’t talk down to them<br />
  140. 140. Start with personal comments<br />Break the ice<br />Don’t rush headlong into business<br />Show sincere interest in them as people<br />Don’t stick coldly to business<br />Present your case logically, softly, non-threatening<br />Don’t threaten with positional power<br />Ask specific questions<br />Listen carefully<br />Don’t be abrupt and rapid<br />Don’t mistake their willingness to go along for satisfaction<br />Don’t promise something you can’t deliver<br />Allow them time to think<br />
  141. 141. Prepare your case in advance<br />Don’t be disorganized or messy<br />Approach them in a straightforward, direct way<br />Don’t be casual, informal or personal<br />Don’t force a quick decision<br />Present specifics, and do what you say you can do<br />Don’t be vague about expectations or fail to follow through<br />Draw up an “Action Plan” with scheduled dates and milestones<br />Don’t over promise<br />Take you time, but be persistent<br />Don’t be abrupt and rapid<br />Don’t appeal to opinion or feelings as evidence<br />Allow them their space<br />Provide them with the information and the time they need to make a decision<br />
  142. 142. Elements of Versatility<br />Image<br />What is our image?<br />Presentation<br />How do we communicate with others?<br />Knowledge & Competence<br />If we are a klutz, then all is lost<br />Feed back<br />Listen to the vibes being transmitted by others<br />
  143. 143. Conclusion<br />Once we have assumed all the elements of versatility, we must accept the fact that we control only 50% of any relationship<br />If we try to make a relationship work and it fails, AT LEAST WE TRIED.<br />
  144. 144. Personality Adjectives<br />Control<br />Analytical<br /><ul><li>Industrious
  145. 145. Persistent
  146. 146. Serious
  147. 147. Vigilant
  148. 148. Orderly</li></ul>Driver<br /><ul><li>Pushy
  149. 149. Severe
  150. 150. Tough-Minded
  151. 151. Dominating
  152. 152. Harsh
  153. 153. Critical
  154. 154. Indecisive
  155. 155. Stuffy
  156. 156. Exacting
  157. 157. Moralistic
  158. 158. Determined
  159. 159. Requiring
  160. 160. Thorough
  161. 161. Decisive
  162. 162. Efficient</li></ul>Ask<br />Tell<br />Amiable<br />Supportive<br />Respectful<br />Willing<br />Dependable<br />Agreeable<br />Expressive<br />Manipulative<br />Excitable<br />Undisciplined<br />Reacting<br />Promotional<br /><ul><li>Conforming
  163. 163. Retiring
  164. 164. Ingratiating
  165. 165. Dependent
  166. 166. Awkward
  167. 167. Personable
  168. 168. Stimulating
  169. 169. Enthusiastic
  170. 170. Dramatic
  171. 171. Gregarious</li></ul>Emotional<br />