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Tpr Difficult Discussions

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complete ppt for difficult discussions

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Tpr Difficult Discussions

  1. 2. Agenda <ul><li>9:00 Self Introduction, “Koinonia Connection” and “Hand of the Lord Time </li></ul><ul><li>10:00 Characteristics of a Healthy Church </li></ul><ul><li>12:00 Working lunch </li></ul><ul><li>12:30 Discussion of KANI </li></ul><ul><li>Any left over time… “Popcorn” KANI </li></ul><ul><li>2:30 Dismiss </li></ul>
  2. 3. Hand of the Lord
  3. 4. Koinonia Connection PAST Here is something about my past that would help you know me better DEFINING A difficult life experience which MOMENT helped me grow as a person was.. VALUES Here’s what I stand for… Ask follow up, onion peeling questions X Information + Feelings Information Only X
  4. 5. The Difficult Discussion <ul><li>What is it? </li></ul><ul><li>Why is it so difficult? </li></ul><ul><li>How do you do it? </li></ul>15
  5. 6. Fierce Conversation A fierce conversation is one in which you come out from behind yourself into the conversation and make it real. robust intense strong powerful passionate eager unbridled uncurbed by Susan Scott 15
  6. 7. The Goal The goal of a fierce conversation is to get everyone’s reality out on the table, so that it can be interrogated. Everyone’s! 15
  7. 8. Difficult Discussion: Why So Difficult? Key Principle Highly effective people act their way into a new way of feeling… they do not feel their way into a new way of acting. 16
  8. 9. 1. “You” Listen to understand 2. “Me” Ask… then present 3. “It” Brainstorm solutions (What’s right, not who’s right?) 4. “Us” Agree to who will do what by when… and set date to inspect what you expect Difficult Discussions 101 16
  9. 10. Difficult Discussions 201 Invitation Investigation Dialogue Follow Up Get the Facts One Minute Intro “ You” “Me” “It” “Us” Inspect What You Expect Results Relationships Trust 16
  10. 11. Difficult Discussions 201 Invitation Investigation Dialogue Follow Up Get the Facts One Minute Intro “ You” “Me” “It” “Us” Inspect What You Expect Results Relationships Trust “ Would you be willing to talk with me long enough until we arrive at a solution that is acceptable to both of us? Enlarged on next slide <ul><ul><li> 1. Identify the issue. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li> 2. Illustrate the gap. (Be specific) </li></ul></ul><ul><li> 3. Clarify what is at stake. </li></ul><ul><li> 4. Identify any contribution you may have made to this issue </li></ul><ul><li> 5. Indicate your desire to resolve the issue. </li></ul><ul><li> 6. Invite the other person to respond. </li></ul>17
  11. 12. One Minute Intro <ul><ul><li> 1. Identify the issue. </li></ul></ul><ul><ul><li> 2. Illustrate the gap. (Be specific) </li></ul></ul><ul><li>3. Clarify what is at stake. </li></ul><ul><li>4. Identify any contribution you may have made to this issue </li></ul><ul><li>5. Indicate your desire to resolve the issue. </li></ul><ul><li>6. Invite the other person to respond. </li></ul>17
  12. 13. “ Would you be willing to talk with me long enough until we arrive at a solution that is acceptable to both of us?
  13. 14. Dealing with the KANI’s of Life and Ministry <ul><li>S…ituation </li></ul><ul><li>P…roblem </li></ul><ul><li>E…vidence – is it measureable? </li></ul><ul><li>What is the cost $$, image, rep.?? </li></ul><ul><li>C…onsequences over time </li></ul><ul><li>I…mplications </li></ul><ul><li>F…uture Fix </li></ul><ul><li>I…mplications </li></ul><ul><li>C…onstraints </li></ul>What are the Issues?
  14. 22. Daily Debrief

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