SlideShare a Scribd company logo
1 of 31
Download to read offline
Patterns of Fail
Don't know, don't care
Why do we fail ?
Failure
Failure is an option - most people working hard or seriously will
have failures to account for. The most interesting and character
defining trait of these people is how they recovered.
Advocates for Competence based interviewing teach do
concentrate on mistakes as learning experiencies.
Honesty rings a bell - What was the last time you f* up and how
you made up to that ?
Fail
There is failure, and there is FAIL
- Project managers managing HTML pages - Fail
- Methodologies sold as silver bullet - Fail
- Excess Excitement - Fail
- Less code, more tests - Fail
- Architecture of CRUD - Fail
- Failure and then failure again - FAIL
- Fall, Rise and Fail - EPIC FAIL
Behind the fail
Bikeshedding
Parkinson's Law of Triviality is C. Northcote Parkinson's 1957
argument that organisations give disproportionate weight to trivial
issues.
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkinson's_Law_of_Triviality)
Patterns of fail
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Paper_clip
Entrepreneurs
Once upon a time there was
a 30-ish year-old vagrant
who never had a job. He had
never done a thing.
He thought he was fucking
clever so he started trying to
convince people by doing
magic stuff to impress dumb
folks around the way.
Not Jesus folks, meet the
CULT OF REWORK
Patterns of fail
Entrepreneurs - Cult of Rework
Entrepreneurs - Cult of Rework
Behavioral Patterns
Lazy observer - Object to be realized some day
Chain of irresponsibility (single irresponsibility principle)
Dumb interpreter - impedance mismatch
Mediator - the wireless phone
Visitor - constant visitor to the project
Strategy - see capt. obvious, prophets of the past
Lazy Observer
"I just work here"
"I am not the technical person (more from product owners)"
" X is my role, and that was not described on it"
Commitment. Ownership.
The specialist.
Chain of Irresponsibility
The naive belief in "Best practices"
Broadcasting errors. Optimizations. Trust the database.
Developer blames sysadmin, sysadmin blames network guys,
network guys blames infrastructure which blames ......
"Hudson is not red anymore, time to go home"
Github and Continous Integration
Dumb Interpreter
Someone once said that there should be more tests than code.
Then a horde followed back and forgot that good code works.
Tons of tests for stupid code. DOJOs follow up. Until the day
there is a project which is not a CRUD.
Best practices for system administration should make
developers and syadmins work together.
Then someone comes with devops and Infrastructure as code
and TDD for infrastructure - lets create a failing alarm, and
correct it installing the proper service. Until you have 1M users
with no service available.
Mediator
Simply said, the guy between the manager and the
programmer/sysadmin.
Methodology roles that somehow morphs into job descriptions.
WHO ?
Visitor
Your pair on pair programming.
The guy who checks his iPhone, his watch, corrects comment's
spelling and helps writing commit messages while you are
working on a CSS file.
The guy that's keep arguing over trivial semantics (see bike
shedding)
Your very own partner, discussing which VIM theme is better
for syntax highlight
Strategy
So there is this guy who knows everything. He has the most
amazing ideas about everything.
He is Warren Buffett in somebody else's body. For some
(unfair) reason, he doesn't own the company.
But he is the man and start shitting theories, rules and
products. When the real world comes over and proves he's a
smartacus, then you realize he is ...
Patterns of fail
Captain Obvious is never wrong. Those ideas were not his. He
always knew that the product would fail but he is altruistic and
let people learn from their mistakes.
At every moment, count on a perfect and didactic explanation
to what went wrong and a fucking gigantic email blaming
somebody else.
Right in the sky, above all clouds...
CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, THE PROPHET OF THE PAST
Futility Belt
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail
Patterns of fail

More Related Content

Viewers also liked

How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong Reason
How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong ReasonHow Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong Reason
How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong ReasonFabio Wakim Trentini
 
You shall not get excited
You shall not get excitedYou shall not get excited
You shall not get excitedx697272
 
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)Gleicon Moraes
 
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message Queue
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message QueueRestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message Queue
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message QueueGleicon Moraes
 

Viewers also liked (7)

How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong Reason
How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong ReasonHow Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong Reason
How Not To Use The Right Tool For The Wrong Reason
 
You shall not get excited
You shall not get excitedYou shall not get excited
You shall not get excited
 
Software Instability
Software InstabilitySoftware Instability
Software Instability
 
Agile or Fragile
Agile or FragileAgile or Fragile
Agile or Fragile
 
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)
Dlsecyx pgroammr (Dyslexic Programmer - cool stuff for scaling)
 
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message Queue
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message QueueRestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message Queue
RestMQ - HTTP/Redis based Message Queue
 
Surf and trend watching
Surf and trend watchingSurf and trend watching
Surf and trend watching
 

Similar to Patterns of fail

Big guns for small guys (reloaded)
Big guns for small guys (reloaded)Big guns for small guys (reloaded)
Big guns for small guys (reloaded)Jorge López-Lago
 
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software Engineer
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software EngineerSpringOne Tour: The Influential Software Engineer
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software EngineerVMware Tanzu
 
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we Today
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we TodayAgile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we Today
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we TodayGary Pedretti
 
Notes on Simulation and GHDL
Notes on Simulation and GHDLNotes on Simulation and GHDL
Notes on Simulation and GHDLDIlawar Singh
 
Breathing Data, Competing on Code
Breathing Data, Competing on CodeBreathing Data, Competing on Code
Breathing Data, Competing on CodeVenkatesh Rao
 
#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway
#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway
#1NWebinar: Digital on the RunwayOne North
 
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentation
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration PresentationOpen Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentation
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentationdarryl_lehmann
 
Patterns for the People
Patterns for the PeoplePatterns for the People
Patterns for the PeopleKevlin Henney
 
Classroom to careers in Web Development
Classroom to careers in Web DevelopmentClassroom to careers in Web Development
Classroom to careers in Web DevelopmentDouglas Ng
 
Resisting The Feature Creature
Resisting The Feature CreatureResisting The Feature Creature
Resisting The Feature CreatureChristian Heilmann
 
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learningMax Pagels
 
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/O
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/OLess is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/O
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/OMichael Roytman
 
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: Notes
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: NotesTouchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: Notes
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: NotesVisnja Milidragovic
 
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed Apidays
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed ApidaysFrom DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed Apidays
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed ApidaysOri Pekelman
 
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...Jennifer Letterman
 
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patterns
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patternsCinci ug-january2011-anti-patterns
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patternsSteven Smith
 
2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation
2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation
2013_OSCON_Innovation_PresentationLaszlo Szalvay
 
Community engagement
Community engagementCommunity engagement
Community engagementRoss Turk
 

Similar to Patterns of fail (20)

Big guns for small guys (reloaded)
Big guns for small guys (reloaded)Big guns for small guys (reloaded)
Big guns for small guys (reloaded)
 
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software Engineer
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software EngineerSpringOne Tour: The Influential Software Engineer
SpringOne Tour: The Influential Software Engineer
 
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we Today
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we TodayAgile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we Today
Agile Architecture and Modeling - Where are we Today
 
Notes on Simulation and GHDL
Notes on Simulation and GHDLNotes on Simulation and GHDL
Notes on Simulation and GHDL
 
Breathing Data, Competing on Code
Breathing Data, Competing on CodeBreathing Data, Competing on Code
Breathing Data, Competing on Code
 
The alignment
The alignmentThe alignment
The alignment
 
#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway
#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway
#1NWebinar: Digital on the Runway
 
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentation
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration PresentationOpen Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentation
Open Web Technologies and You - Durham College Student Integration Presentation
 
Patterns for the People
Patterns for the PeoplePatterns for the People
Patterns for the People
 
Classroom to careers in Web Development
Classroom to careers in Web DevelopmentClassroom to careers in Web Development
Classroom to careers in Web Development
 
Resisting The Feature Creature
Resisting The Feature CreatureResisting The Feature Creature
Resisting The Feature Creature
 
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning
(In)convenient truths about applied machine learning
 
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/O
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/OLess is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/O
Less is More: Behind the Data at Risk I/O
 
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: Notes
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: NotesTouchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: Notes
Touchpoint 2012 Symposium on Interaction Design: Notes
 
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed Apidays
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed ApidaysFrom DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed Apidays
From DevOps to NoOps how not to get Equifaxed Apidays
 
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...
The Science Of Math And Science By Mathematical And...
 
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patterns
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patternsCinci ug-january2011-anti-patterns
Cinci ug-january2011-anti-patterns
 
2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation
2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation
2013_OSCON_Innovation_Presentation
 
Plone, quo vadis?
Plone, quo vadis?Plone, quo vadis?
Plone, quo vadis?
 
Community engagement
Community engagementCommunity engagement
Community engagement
 

More from Gleicon Moraes

Como arquiteturas de dados quebram
Como arquiteturas de dados quebramComo arquiteturas de dados quebram
Como arquiteturas de dados quebramGleicon Moraes
 
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devops
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devopsArquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devops
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devopsGleicon Moraes
 
DNAD 2015 - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...
DNAD 2015  - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...DNAD 2015  - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...
DNAD 2015 - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...Gleicon Moraes
 
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...Gleicon Moraes
 
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014Gleicon Moraes
 
A closer look to locaweb IaaS
A closer look to locaweb IaaSA closer look to locaweb IaaS
A closer look to locaweb IaaSGleicon Moraes
 
Semi Automatic Sentiment Analysis
Semi Automatic Sentiment AnalysisSemi Automatic Sentiment Analysis
Semi Automatic Sentiment AnalysisGleicon Moraes
 
L'esprit de l'escalier
L'esprit de l'escalierL'esprit de l'escalier
L'esprit de l'escalierGleicon Moraes
 
OSCon - Performance vs Scalability
OSCon - Performance vs ScalabilityOSCon - Performance vs Scalability
OSCon - Performance vs ScalabilityGleicon Moraes
 
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling Failures
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling FailuresArchitectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling Failures
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling FailuresGleicon Moraes
 
Architecture by Accident
Architecture by AccidentArchitecture by Accident
Architecture by AccidentGleicon Moraes
 
Architectural anti-patterns for data handling
Architectural anti-patterns for data handlingArchitectural anti-patterns for data handling
Architectural anti-patterns for data handlingGleicon Moraes
 
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handling
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handlingArchitectural anti patterns_for_data_handling
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handlingGleicon Moraes
 
NoSQL and SQL Anti Patterns
NoSQL and SQL Anti PatternsNoSQL and SQL Anti Patterns
NoSQL and SQL Anti PatternsGleicon Moraes
 

More from Gleicon Moraes (18)

Como arquiteturas de dados quebram
Como arquiteturas de dados quebramComo arquiteturas de dados quebram
Como arquiteturas de dados quebram
 
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devops
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devopsArquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devops
Arquitetura emergente - sobre cultura devops
 
API Gateway report
API Gateway reportAPI Gateway report
API Gateway report
 
DNAD 2015 - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...
DNAD 2015  - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...DNAD 2015  - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...
DNAD 2015 - Como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplicação pode jogar contra ...
 
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...
QCon SP 2015 - Advogados do diabo: como a arquitetura emergente de sua aplica...
 
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014
Por trás da infraestrutura do Cloud - Campus Party 2014
 
Locaweb cloud and sdn
Locaweb cloud and sdnLocaweb cloud and sdn
Locaweb cloud and sdn
 
A closer look to locaweb IaaS
A closer look to locaweb IaaSA closer look to locaweb IaaS
A closer look to locaweb IaaS
 
Semi Automatic Sentiment Analysis
Semi Automatic Sentiment AnalysisSemi Automatic Sentiment Analysis
Semi Automatic Sentiment Analysis
 
L'esprit de l'escalier
L'esprit de l'escalierL'esprit de l'escalier
L'esprit de l'escalier
 
OSCon - Performance vs Scalability
OSCon - Performance vs ScalabilityOSCon - Performance vs Scalability
OSCon - Performance vs Scalability
 
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling Failures
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling FailuresArchitectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling Failures
Architectural Anti Patterns - Notes on Data Distribution and Handling Failures
 
Architecture by Accident
Architecture by AccidentArchitecture by Accident
Architecture by Accident
 
Architectural anti-patterns for data handling
Architectural anti-patterns for data handlingArchitectural anti-patterns for data handling
Architectural anti-patterns for data handling
 
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handling
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handlingArchitectural anti patterns_for_data_handling
Architectural anti patterns_for_data_handling
 
NoSQL and SQL Anti Patterns
NoSQL and SQL Anti PatternsNoSQL and SQL Anti Patterns
NoSQL and SQL Anti Patterns
 
Redis
RedisRedis
Redis
 
NoSql Introduction
NoSql IntroductionNoSql Introduction
NoSql Introduction
 

Recently uploaded

How to release an Open Source Dataweave Library
How to release an Open Source Dataweave LibraryHow to release an Open Source Dataweave Library
How to release an Open Source Dataweave Libraryshyamraj55
 
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024Brian Pichman
 
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 update
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 updatePatch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 update
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 updateadam112203
 
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)IES VE
 
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced Computing
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced ComputingIT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced Computing
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced ComputingMAGNIntelligence
 
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for Biomedical Applications
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for  Biomedical ApplicationsGraphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for  Biomedical Applications
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for Biomedical Applicationsnooralam814309
 
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenarios
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenariosScenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenarios
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenariosErol GIRAUDY
 
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptx
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptxEmil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptx
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptxNeo4j
 
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdfThe Good Food Institute
 
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3DianaGray10
 
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0DanBrown980551
 
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024Brian Pichman
 
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2DianaGray10
 
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...DianaGray10
 
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projects
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projectsAutomation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projects
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projectsDianaGray10
 
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptx
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptxHow to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptx
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptxKaustubhBhavsar6
 
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)codyslingerland1
 
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4j
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4jNovo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4j
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4jNeo4j
 
March Patch Tuesday
March Patch TuesdayMarch Patch Tuesday
March Patch TuesdayIvanti
 

Recently uploaded (20)

How to release an Open Source Dataweave Library
How to release an Open Source Dataweave LibraryHow to release an Open Source Dataweave Library
How to release an Open Source Dataweave Library
 
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024
AI Workshops at Computers In Libraries 2024
 
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 update
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 updatePatch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 update
Patch notes explaining DISARM Version 1.4 update
 
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)
The Importance of Indoor Air Quality (English)
 
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced Computing
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced ComputingIT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced Computing
IT Service Management (ITSM) Best Practices for Advanced Computing
 
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for Biomedical Applications
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for  Biomedical ApplicationsGraphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for  Biomedical Applications
Graphene Quantum Dots-Based Composites for Biomedical Applications
 
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenarios
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenariosScenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenarios
Scenario Library et REX Discover industry- and role- based scenarios
 
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptx
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptxEmil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptx
Emil Eifrem at GraphSummit Copenhagen 2024 - The Art of the Possible.pptx
 
SheDev 2024
SheDev 2024SheDev 2024
SheDev 2024
 
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf
2024.03.12 Cost drivers of cultivated meat production.pdf
 
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3
UiPath Studio Web workshop Series - Day 3
 
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0
LF Energy Webinar - Unveiling OpenEEMeter 4.0
 
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024
CyberSecurity - Computers In Libraries 2024
 
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2
UiPath Studio Web workshop series - Day 2
 
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...
Explore the UiPath Community and ways you can benefit on your journey to auto...
 
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projects
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projectsAutomation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projects
Automation Ops Series: Session 2 - Governance for UiPath projects
 
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptx
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptxHow to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptx
How to become a GDSC Lead GDSC MI AOE.pptx
 
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)
The New Cloud World Order Is FinOps (Slideshow)
 
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4j
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4jNovo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4j
Novo Nordisk's journey in developing an open-source application on Neo4j
 
March Patch Tuesday
March Patch TuesdayMarch Patch Tuesday
March Patch Tuesday
 

Patterns of fail

  • 1. Patterns of Fail Don't know, don't care
  • 2. Why do we fail ?
  • 3. Failure Failure is an option - most people working hard or seriously will have failures to account for. The most interesting and character defining trait of these people is how they recovered. Advocates for Competence based interviewing teach do concentrate on mistakes as learning experiencies. Honesty rings a bell - What was the last time you f* up and how you made up to that ?
  • 4. Fail There is failure, and there is FAIL - Project managers managing HTML pages - Fail - Methodologies sold as silver bullet - Fail - Excess Excitement - Fail - Less code, more tests - Fail - Architecture of CRUD - Fail - Failure and then failure again - FAIL - Fall, Rise and Fail - EPIC FAIL
  • 6. Bikeshedding Parkinson's Law of Triviality is C. Northcote Parkinson's 1957 argument that organisations give disproportionate weight to trivial issues. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkinson's_Law_of_Triviality)
  • 9. Entrepreneurs Once upon a time there was a 30-ish year-old vagrant who never had a job. He had never done a thing. He thought he was fucking clever so he started trying to convince people by doing magic stuff to impress dumb folks around the way. Not Jesus folks, meet the CULT OF REWORK
  • 11. Entrepreneurs - Cult of Rework
  • 12. Entrepreneurs - Cult of Rework
  • 13. Behavioral Patterns Lazy observer - Object to be realized some day Chain of irresponsibility (single irresponsibility principle) Dumb interpreter - impedance mismatch Mediator - the wireless phone Visitor - constant visitor to the project Strategy - see capt. obvious, prophets of the past
  • 14. Lazy Observer "I just work here" "I am not the technical person (more from product owners)" " X is my role, and that was not described on it" Commitment. Ownership. The specialist.
  • 15. Chain of Irresponsibility The naive belief in "Best practices" Broadcasting errors. Optimizations. Trust the database. Developer blames sysadmin, sysadmin blames network guys, network guys blames infrastructure which blames ...... "Hudson is not red anymore, time to go home" Github and Continous Integration
  • 16. Dumb Interpreter Someone once said that there should be more tests than code. Then a horde followed back and forgot that good code works. Tons of tests for stupid code. DOJOs follow up. Until the day there is a project which is not a CRUD. Best practices for system administration should make developers and syadmins work together. Then someone comes with devops and Infrastructure as code and TDD for infrastructure - lets create a failing alarm, and correct it installing the proper service. Until you have 1M users with no service available.
  • 17. Mediator Simply said, the guy between the manager and the programmer/sysadmin. Methodology roles that somehow morphs into job descriptions. WHO ?
  • 18. Visitor Your pair on pair programming. The guy who checks his iPhone, his watch, corrects comment's spelling and helps writing commit messages while you are working on a CSS file. The guy that's keep arguing over trivial semantics (see bike shedding) Your very own partner, discussing which VIM theme is better for syntax highlight
  • 19. Strategy So there is this guy who knows everything. He has the most amazing ideas about everything. He is Warren Buffett in somebody else's body. For some (unfair) reason, he doesn't own the company. But he is the man and start shitting theories, rules and products. When the real world comes over and proves he's a smartacus, then you realize he is ...
  • 21. Captain Obvious is never wrong. Those ideas were not his. He always knew that the product would fail but he is altruistic and let people learn from their mistakes. At every moment, count on a perfect and didactic explanation to what went wrong and a fucking gigantic email blaming somebody else. Right in the sky, above all clouds... CAPTAIN OBVIOUS, THE PROPHET OF THE PAST