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Love and fear


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articles on love and fear and its impact.
the role of hormones...

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Love and fear

  1. 1. LOVE AND FEAR Understanding these two emotions are not so easy. Yes....but one, fear...this is the emotion that exist most of the time in you...and love has something more to be felt.... Have you ever observed what happens in you, when you are in front of your strict professor who is about to fire you right now!!? ...What happens in you when someone is observing you right now without taking his/her eyes at you? What happens in you when you get a question paper in the upcoming university exam where you find questions asked happens to be from the chapters which you haven’t read? What happens in you when you face your friend with whom you had a bad break up yesterday? What happens in you when you get news that 47 are failed out of 100, and you got your exams really bad? Yes it is happening right inside you. You feel bad when you read these questions .yes, even words can influence your feelings!! Yes the fear are many, the most feared fears are 1) Fear of death. (The biggest fear on earth). 2) Fear of the real change within oneself. 3) Fear of past (tensions) - In relationships, profession, reputations, guilt feelings. 4) Fear of future (anxiety) – In relationships, exams, exam results, future life partner. 5) Fear of losing a person you love a lot. 6) Fear of your loved one cheating you. On going deeper to the psychology of fear you will see More........... Fear of becoming nothing in front of the people, otherwise known as the mental state of ego, mostly pertaining to men. It is from this fear that men are forced to beat/compete with a person. So Men uses his muscle power to conquer a person. Do you what happen when you transmutate this fear!!It’s the feeling of total humility, submissiveness of the heart that you have towards your friends, relatives etc, and the better relationships you have. Fear of someone becoming bigger than me, it is otherwise known as the mental state of jealousy, mostly pertaining to women. It is from this fear women are forced to gossip a person. So Women are forced to use her tears to conquer a person if she knows there is no other way that she would be accepted by others and it’s so common, as hearts are often melted by her tears. Do you know what happens when you transmutate this Fear!!It’s the feeling of contentment of the heart..The more become content in your life the more you find inner joy and happiness in your life, the more content. The more you would able to thank others and trust others. Because being rich is not having a bucket full of money, a big fame or big reputations, Because richness is the self contentment of one’s heart, only then he/she would be able to enjoy with what he/she have with him/her!!If not, you will find emptiness in you always; worries and restlessness will follow you wherever you go, whoever you are!!
  2. 2. The FEAR will push you to more troubles. More than you think. Yes, it does happen in your life. This fear will make you to do something nasty, which you didn’t ever imagine. It usually happens in our life. It makes you even forget things in your exams. It is the very same emotion that helps you when you are in a real life accident too. Yes, you would have the very emergency hormone, Adrenaline released, which affects your own body a lot and they are unwantedly stimulated by the thoughts that emerge from these fear.. Yes... the more your thoughts are at fear state, the more you produce the very same hormone Adrenaline. But unfortunately this hormone is meant for your flight fight response. If you have a bad thought on day to day activities, of course you would have it circulating right now in your circulating system. Imagine what will be your life, if all your fears are washed away at the shore of the blue sea. The only antidote for this is LOVE that most of us deprived off & most often you search for!! LOVE Love I bet this is the emotion that can be felt only by the luckiest people on the earth....(When I mean lucky, I really mean it and is beyond the words I could write). The love is truly a feeling that is unexplainable and cannot be expressed fully to a person that how much you love he/she! Taking Love... What would be your feeling when you have your darling close to you? What would be your feeling when the person you love the most observes you without taking eyes off and you felt listened to whatever you talked to him/her with a gentle touch on your finger tips? Yes, you are feeling it right now; you feel it really really good. The love exists in three states... Feeling state (pure love) Emotional state (psychological love) Thinking state (false love) Because, the love to become pure, it takes a series of hardships in your life... See.... love is of two types in reality. Love Conditional Love Unconditional Love
  3. 3. Can you keep on loving a person unconditionally, no matter whatever he/she has done to you or whoever he/she may be? Can you smile at all the person equally in this world? (At least in our college). Guess what...... There are some barriers in attaining this unconditional love, right? There is nothing to worry about, but it takes time. I said “Only the luckiest ones on earth could do that!” It is purely a compassionate love (mixed with mercy and love). But still I insist that all the “Romeo and Juliet” of our campus really enjoy it a little bit. BUT remember falling in love is easy BUT staying in love requires a great work than you ever imagine!! The components of long lasting relationships are 1. Love 2. Intimacy 3. Commitment You could see women commit a lot and men wont too much. Intimacy is yet another factor that decides how much you open up each other to your friends, relatives, loved ones etc. Some appreciate love as being given beautiful gifts. While some appreciate love if you only said “I love you a lot”. But some appreciate love only if you would have kissed on forehead or even if you only hugged intimately, because these people need to feel rather than your words. The notorious kind of love is conditional love. This is the worst kind of love, I have to admit so. What happens when your parents say: “What do you mean that we don’t love you.....? Then why are we spending money on your education, food and hostel and etc, etc...” What happens when your partner in life say “Who told!!....I bought these things for you... is it so that I don’t love you?!” in reality you are thinking you love him/her but you are not feeling it. Man....this kind of love really makes you really feel bad. NB: Love at first sight is foolish, whatever it is, whoever it is. Do you know why you feel good when you are appreciated well for your sincere works? Yes, it’s due to the dopamine produced which makes you feel so. The very word “thank you” saves your relationships a lot, but most of us even forget so. Do you know what makes you feel attached to the one you love a lot. It happens when the bonding hormone oxytocin releases so. And the most powerful hormone that comes out from gut, heart and brain is the serotonin, which makes you feel so high in a state of tranquillity, serenity and peace when you reach Closer to the state of feeling of pure love in you. A state at which there is nothing for you to lose or anything to gain in your life. Where you enjoy each moments of your life. As each moments will become the most precious diamonds that you have never ever imagined!! IF YOU LOVE SOMEBODY FOR A REASON, REMEMBER AT ANY MOMENT IN YOUR LIFE THAT REASON CAN BE TAKEN AWAY. SO LOVE FOR NO REASON. One who has fallen to the feeling of pure love is lucky and others still have the potential within them..... So friends I have to end here, or else............ Fahad Basheer 2009