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Mediation workshop, Erasmus+ project New Literacy Set, 2015-2017

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  1. 1. MEDIATION "New Literacy Set" project 2015-2017
  2. 2. "Human beings love to be right. When a person is willing to give it up, it opens a whole world of possibilities. " Pete Salmansohn
  3. 3. CONFLICTS ▪ Are conflicts necessary evil? ▪ Should we avoid them? ▪ Is there anything good in conflicts, and what does it depend on? ▪ Is it possible to solve the conflict in a peaceful and non-violent way? ▪ What is mediation, and how can it help to solve them that way?
  4. 4. WHY DO CONFLICTS EXIST? ▪ Unmet psychological needs ▪ Information (lack of information, wrong interpretation) ▪ Relationships where there is strong emotions ▪ Passive listening ▪ YOU messages ▪ General lack of understanding ▪ Limited resources that people compete for ▪ Different interests, values (ideology, religion) ▪ Prejudice, stereotyps, manipulation...
  5. 5. TRIGGERS • Non-verbal or verbal • Words, attitudes, movements • Affect us to produce a negative reaction, strong emotions • Draw attention from the REAL PROBLEMS • BECOME AWARE OF THEM • CONTROLTHEM
  7. 7. POSITION • Visible during direct confrontation - at the beginning • Complaint, demand, criticism, a firm stand • Clearly expressed and visible attitudes, requirements, conditions, ready-made solutions that are put before the other side • Expressed as "YOU" messages, or unrealistic / one-sided request The conflict arises from different POSITIONS of conflicting parties!
  8. 8. • The actual personal reasons and motives that led the person to take a particular position and what he/she wants to achieve - reasons why people want, expect, will something • Opinions, anxiety, previous conflicts and conscious or unconscious desires • Usually are not spoken aloud - hidden, mostly out of fear • It requires great skills to reach them - person turns to oneself and "I" speech appears Identifying the common interests of the conflicting parties is usually a key point of conflict resolution! INTERESTS
  9. 9. • Lead the main role in conflicts WITHOUT the conflicting parties being aware of them • Something "without which people can not live" • Abraham Maslow lists: physiological needs, the need for security, the need for belonging, the need for recognition, and the need for self-realization • Feelings, motives, personal unresolved issues from the past that affect reactions (often unfulfilled needs like freedom, love, respect...) • Drives people to various actions, including entering into conflicts in which they want to fulfill their needs, and which provokes certain attitudes • Common to all, but differently expressed NEEDS
  10. 10. MEDIATION • Also called "conciliation" and "intervention", from Latin word mediare (split in half, intervene, to stand between two people) • PARTIES of the conflict, with the HELP of a third party,THE MEDIATOR come up with a SOLUTION • Voluntary process, the parties give consent or themselves initiate mediation • Committed to dialogue, tolerance and non- violence, improving teamwork, builds cooperation, promotes negotiation
  11. 11. • The mediator is NEUTRAL • He helps the parties:  to be BETTER HEARD  to know how to RECOGNIZE each other's FEELINGS  to move away from their "cocooned" POSITIONS  to hear each other's NEEDS  to break down PREJUDICES  to become aware of COMMON INTERESTS for the development of future relations • The parties control the process • The basic idea is to empower the parties of the conflict and to achieve a balance between both sides • The outcome of mediation is not binding for the participants – but there is an ethical obligation
  12. 12. ACTIVE LISTENING: 1. ASK QUESTIONS - open questions - narrowing questions - guidance questions 2. PARAPHRASE 3. SUMMARIZE 4. GIVE FEEDBACK 5. REFLECT FEELINGS 6. ENCOURAGE 7. FRACTION THE MEDIATOR
  13. 13. TYPES OF MEDIATION • Mediation in court • Family mediation • Church mediation • School mediation • Mediation in the workplace • International mediation
  14. 14. PEER MEDIATION Benefits of peer mediators are: - EASIER for them to IDENTIFY problems, needs, feelings and desires of their peers, as mediators are sometimes in their position - NO PRESSURE of authority of adults - the PROCESS IS ADJUSTED to age of their peers (expressions, terminology, application of the best methods and techniques) - LESS DEPENDENT on adult authority, and make more solutions themselves - DEVELOP communication, assertiveness, leadership skills and self-confidence - mediators have a POSITIVE IMPACT on other students, and the overall climate of the school is improving
  15. 15. PROCESS OF MEDIATION STEP 1. INTRODUCTION – SETTING RULES • WELCOMING and seating arrangement • PRINCIPLES - mediation is voluntary, mediator impartial, solutions are to the mutual benefit of both sides • RULES - appropriate expression (no insults, interrupting, swearing) • Ask both parties if they AGREE with it, and if they want to add some important rule for them
  16. 16. PROCESS OF MEDIATION STEP 2. STORYTELLING • First ONE STORY, then ANOTHER conflicting party • Emphasize that everyone will have the RIGHT to say what they want, and that there is NO INTERRUPTING • PARAPHRASE what you hear from each side • Maintain EQUAL amounts of time, attention, interest for both sides • When someone interrupts it is important to RETURN to the agreed rules
  17. 17. PROCESS OF MEDIATION STEP 3. DETERMINING POSITIONS, INTERESTS AND NEEDS • The MOST IMPORTANT moment of mediation, when the parties in the conflict are MOVED from their POSITIONS (what they demand) to the INTERESTS (true needs, desires, concerns) • Here it is important to ACTIVELY LISTEN which is consisted of: 1. ASKING QUESTIONS 2. PARAPHRASING 3. SUMMARISING 4. GIVING FEEDBACK 5. REFLECTING EMOTIONS 6. ENCOURAGING 7. FRACTIONING
  19. 19. PROCESS OF MEDIATION STEP 5. SELECTINGTHE SOLUTION • Focus the discussion on the MOST ACCEPTABLE possible solution, thinking about its CONSEQUENCES
  20. 20. PROCESS OF MEDIATION STEP 6. AGREEMENT • Help the parties of the conflict to reach an agreement acceptable to both sides • The agreement must be written • It should contain answers to the questions: Who? What? When? Where? • The agreement is signed • Sanctions are agreed for non-compliance with the conditions of the agreement
  21. 21. PROCESS OF MEDIATION POTENTIAL STEP - SEPARATE CONSULTATION • NOT often • If there is too much INTERFERENCE in the communication • Mediator PAUSES the mediation • Conducts SEPARATE consultations only with one side to correct the problems