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Self-Coaching & Culture, September 2014

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Self-Coaching & Culture, September 2014

  1. 1. Self-coaching Photo by Seth Anderson [link] & culture September 12, 2014 Ed Batista
  2. 2. Concepts #1 Photo by Lee Nachtigal [link]
  3. 3. Concepts #1 Self-coaching Self-engagement Mindset Emotion management Mindfulness Coaching team Photo by Lee Nachtigal [link]
  4. 4. Self-coaching 99% of coaching = self-coaching Not a solitary experience But self-directed Photo by Seth Anderson [link] Read More
  5. 5. Self-engagement Photo by lian xiaoxiao [link] Read More
  6. 6. Self-engagement Starting point Two aspects 1. An attitude toward ourselves 2. A dialogue with ourselves Photo by lian xiaoxiao [link]
  7. 7. Attitude Open to learning Capable of change A work in progress Growth mindset* Photo by lian xiaoxiao [link]
  8. 8. Mindset Photo by Mike Disharoon [link]
  9. 9. Mindset Carol Dweck Perceptions shape reality How do we perceive our abilities? How do we perceive our mistakes? Photo by Mike Disharoon [link] Read More
  10. 10. Fixed Growth Talent & intelligence are inherent traits Mistakes are failures or character flaws Negative emotional response to mistakes Talent & intelligence can be developed Mistakes are learning opportunities Pay close attention to mistakes & learn more Mindset Adapted from Carol Dweck [link] Read More
  11. 11. Dialogue Step outside our experience Observe ourselves and reflect Alone and with others Regular practices Photo by lian xiaoxiao [link]
  12. 12. Self-engagement Practical steps Observe our mindset Dedicate time for reflection After-action reviews and journaling Coaching conversations* Photo by lian xiaoxiao [link]
  13. 13. Emotion Photo by Samantha Marx [link] management
  14. 14. Emotion management Regulation ≠ suppression Photo by Samantha Marx [link]
  15. 15. Emotion management Four stages 1. Sense 2. Understand 3. Disclose 4. Express Photo by Samantha Marx [link]
  16. 16. Emotion management 1. Sense Physiological experiences Physical self-awareness Know our “tells” Photo by Samantha Marx [link]
  17. 17. Emotion management 2. Understand Conscious knowledge Label and name (Vocabulary matters) See our patterns Photo by Samantha Marx [link] Read More
  18. 18. Emotion management 3. Disclose Can I talk about feelings? With you? Here? Culture and norms matter* Photo by Samantha Marx [link] Read More
  19. 19. Emotion management 4. Express Emotions  influence Using our complete toolkit Taking action AND refraining from action Photo by Samantha Marx [link]
  20. 20. Emotion management Practical steps Self-care (exercise and sleep) Talking about feelings Mindfulness* Photo by Samantha Marx [link]
  21. 21. Mindfulness Photo by Strevo [link]
  22. 22. Mindfulness Non-judgmental awareness and acceptance of experience
  23. 23. Mindfulness THE self-development tool Critical to emotion management Executive function
  24. 24. Mindfulness Meditation A workout, not a break Neuroplasticity Impact in just a few minutes… …with regular practice Read More
  25. 25. Mindfulness Meditation Journaling Time in nature Regular reflective practice
  26. 26. Mindfulness Practical steps Meditate 1 minute a day (Increase over time; commitment is key) 3 bullets at the beginning & end of the day Spend 1 hour a week in nature
  27. 27. Coaching team Photo by Mitch Barrie [link]
  28. 28. Coaching team Not a solitary experience We need partners Borrow a pre-frontal cortex Key is knowing what we need Photo by Mitch Barrie [link]
  29. 29. Coaching team Practical steps Use your colleagues “10 minutes of questions” It takes practice Photo by Mitch Barrie [link]
  30. 30. Concepts #2 Photo by Lee Nachtigal [link]
  31. 31. Concepts #2 Feedback-rich culture Safety, trust, intimacy Stress management Positive feedback Normalcy Accountability Photo by Lee Nachtigal [link]
  32. 32. Feedback-rich Photo by Kennisland [link] culture
  33. 33. Feedback-rich culture Individual skills ≈ genes Environment determines their expression Feedback is a function of culture Photo by Kennisland [link]
  34. 34. Feedback-rich culture Norms determine the culture And YOUR behavior sets the norms Individual skill = necessary but insufficient Photo by Kennisland [link] Read More
  35. 35. Safety, trust Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link] & intimacy
  36. 36. Safety, trust & intimacy THE foundation Safety = Will we hurt each other? Trust = Do we believe each other? Intimacy = Can we make the private public? Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link] Read More
  37. 37. Safety, trust & intimacy Think about this team What behaviors make it safer? What behaviors make it less safe? What behaviors build trust? What behaviors erode trust? Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link]
  38. 38. Safety, trust & intimacy Practical steps Invest in relationships (Emotional bank accounts) Respect—and expand—your comfort zone Make it OK to say “Not now” Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link]
  39. 39. Stress management Photo by Josh Giovo [link]
  40. 40. Stress management Feedback is stressful Critical to reduce stress (our own & others’)
  41. 41. Stress management Remember our models SCARF Avoid triggering a threat response in others Reframe and manage our own threat response Read More
  42. 42. Stress management Remember our models The net Don’t assume we know their intention Don’t assume we know their response Focus on behavior and disclose OUR response
  43. 43. Positive feedback Photo by Scott Cutler [link]
  44. 44. Positive feedback Often unsaid Missed opportunities Balance over time is key Express more heartfelt appreciation Read More
  45. 45. Positive feedback Practical steps Start small Praise effort and persistence Offer some positive feedback…and stop
  46. 46. Normalcy Photo by Marc Dalmulder [link]
  47. 47. Normalcy Make feedback normal Not a performance review Leaders = role models You make it OK (or not) Photo by Marc Dalmulder [link]
  48. 48. Normalcy Practical steps Don’t wait for special occasions Work in public Photo by Marc Dalmulder [link]
  49. 49. Accountability Photo by Hector Alejandro [link]
  50. 50. Accountability We can empathize AND hold others accountable We can offer support AND challenge people to grow
  51. 51. Accountability The ultimate goal Efficient learning and growth With minimal stress
  52. 52. Accountability But hold yourselves accountable Be transparent Ask for feedback (Subordinates won’t offer it unless you ask)
  53. 53. To sum up Photo by Pranav Yaddanapudi [link]
  54. 54. To sum up 99% of coaching is self-coaching Mindset & emotion management Mindfulness & reflection Your coaching team
  55. 55. To sum up The culture matters Norms set the culture Safety, trust, intimacy Stress management Make feedback normal
  56. 56. Thanks & Photo by Alex Eflon [link] good-bye!