Frozen dreams small size

Fr oz e n
D r e am s
“How to Break the Ice”

Author, Prophetess Deniece E. Senter

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This book will enable you to reach the top of your mountain
and claim your victory. As you begin reading my story you will
find yourself and watch in awe as the ice surrounding your dreams
begins to melt.
Many of us have gone through life believing that we are nothing
and can't seem to find our purpose. As we watch the television
programs roll across our screens, we try to imagine how celebrities
live, and we find ourselves asking these questions: "How did they
do it? How did they make their dreams come to life? I wish I could
do something like that."
If you find yourself in this category, asking these same
questions, this book is for you. It is my prayer that by reading this
book and answering the questions recorded, you will begin to see
things in you that you never thought existed. As you begin to
discover your talents and gifts, God will then breathe on them and
make them come to life.
This book is a must for those with visions and dreams. It is
especially designed for the procrastinator, and those who need a
push to get them moving in the right direction.

Author, Prophetess Deniece Senter 3
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FROZEN DREAMS “HOW TO BREAK THE ICE”

Copyright 2005 BY AUTHOR
PROPHETESS DENIECE E. SENTER

ISBN:

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. NO PART OF THIS BOOK MAY
BE REPRODUCED IN ANY WAY WITHOUT PERMISSION IN
WRITING FROM THE AUTHOR.

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ALL SCRIPTURES AND SOME REFERENCES ARE
QUOTED FROM THE NELSON STUDY BIBLE KING JAMES
VERSION AND NELSON LIFE IN THE WORD STUDY BIBLE
USED BY PERMISSION.

PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

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DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to my wonderful husband, Pastor
John F. Senter, for all of your loving support,
prayers and wisdom. I love you.

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Table of Contents

1. At Birth……..………..………………………..Page 9

2. The Beginning of Your Destiny………...........Page 17

3. Character Unthawed………………………….Page 25

4. Dreams Unthawed……………………………Page 39

5. Unfolding Season…………………………….Page 59

6. Submissive Season…………………………..Page 65

7. Walk Into Your Season………………………Page 79

8. The Time Is Now……………………………..Page 87

9. Build the Foundation………….………….…..Page 93

10. Your Title………………………………….Page 101

11. The Finish Line……………………………Page 107

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Introduction

Healings, miracles and deliverance are not just promises, they
are established facts. In order to use your gift of faith you cannot
pray, “Lord if it be your will heal me.” It is always in God’s will
that these things are given to you; therefore, lay your hand on your
body and command your healing. Speak to your circumstances and
command your miracle and your deliverance. So many people are
trapped, frozen in one position because they do not understand
God’s will for their life. Put some heat on the situation and thaw
out, the time is now. But you must run to be obedient and fight to
do what is right, whatever God gives you to do. So the question is:
what are you waiting for? Sit down at the computer and start
typing, and watch how so many gifts and dreams will begin to
unfold.
In order to walk in obedience and walk in your divine destiny, it
will require an act of faith. Your faith will be tested and tried; you
will have to become a water walker like Peter. Step out of the boat
by faith. Even if the grounds seem to be unstable, keep your eyes
on the prize and press toward the mark. Should you stumble or
miss the mark, God will be right there to catch you before you
sink. Your obedience will move God, and He will turn His face
toward you and shine upon you. God will then give you all the
tools necessary to carry out your assignment. Your calling and
destiny began at birth.
This book is designed to help you find your place in God and
during your private devotions God will begin to reveal Himself to

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you. In the pages that lie ahead, you will read about my birth and
life experiences as a guide to help you discover your destiny and
purpose. After you read my experience, find yourself in your own
experience and follow the directions, answer each question and
pray each prayer.

Now pray this prayer with me

“Father God in the Name of Jesus, I pray that as I answer these
questions, and as I begin to walk in my high calling that you would
reveal to me your perfect will for my life. I pray that you would
lead me in the right direction, make every crooked road straight,
and guide my feet so that I would not stumble and fall. I bind the
spirit of confusion, and I cast out every false imagination in the
name of Jesus. I come up against the spirit of complacency, the
spirit of fear, and the spirit of fatigue, and I bind the spirit of
laziness in the name of Jesus. Lord as I begin to answer these
questions, I ask that the Holy Spirit would rise in me and do the
writing for me. Lord I ask for your forgiveness in wasting precious
time and for not being obedient. In all these things I ask in Jesus’
name. Amen.”

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In His Image

Chapter One

At Birth

March 4, 1969. It was a cold winter morning, Christina
Martinez stood 5’9 inches tall, and her silky wavy jet-black hair
ran down the center of her back. As she spoke, her Puerto Rican
accent would accentuate her beauty; her tanned, smooth, flawless
skin made her beauty radiant. But what was once her tall, lean,
beautiful 115 pound body was now stretched out like a balloon. At
nine months pregnant and 170 pounds, her feet were swollen and
her head was in terrible pain. Christina lay down next to her
husband for an afternoon nap. All week Christina had been
complaining about feeling fatigued. Christina sat up in bed, faced
her husband, as he too was fatigued after returning home from a
long trip overseas.
“Harold, Harold wake up, my head is pounding and my back
hurts!” Christina said. A sharp pain rushed across her pelvic area,
and then another one. “Oh!” She cried, “I think it’s time!”

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Harold, half awake, sat up in bed, “Christina, you have been in
false labor all month, you know what the doctors said, don’t come
in until your water breaks.”
“I know but this feels different, the pain is shooting from my
head to my back, oh my God! Harold please, call the ambulance,
oh, my stomach!” Christina screamed in agony and pain, she
clutched her stomach and slowly stood up, and made a sound as if
she was trying to push. As she began to walk toward the bathroom
she fell to the floor as water rushed through her legs. Harold
jumped out of the bed and yelled, “Oh my God, Christina, are you
all right? Don’t push!”
“I can’t help it, My God, it hurts!” She raised her legs upward
and bore down hard and began to push.
“Christina,” Harold yelled, “wait, I don’t know what to do.”
Still in his boxers he rushed out of the bedroom and ran down the
hallway towards the front door, and grabbed the car keys that were
sitting on the table next to the door. As he opened the door he
quickly noticed six inches of snow had fallen on the ground. When
he stepped his foot onto the porch he realized he didn’t have any
shoes on and quickly discovered he didn’t have any pants on
either. He rushed back into the house slipping and sliding across
the floor.
As he ran down the hallway he heard Christina’s screams,
“Harold, it’s coming!”
He yelled back, “I’m coming Christina, hold on, I’m coming!”
Oh, how he loved her-they had been married for two years.
They lived in a small duplex apartment numbered 1638 on 16th

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Street in Chicago, Illinois. Christina was his first love; her radiant
beauty captured his heart. She was very elegant, but shy. Her
shyness is what drew him toward her. Harold Bridges loved a mild
tempered woman with flair, one who could hold her own.
Christina was all that and above. Harold was stationed in the
United States Army and was home on leave. One of his prayers
was that he would be home during the birth of his first child.
Christina had a one-year-old daughter from a previous relationship.
Harold loved her as if she was his own, but now he was about to
see what his own seed could produce. Harold came from a mixed
background. His father was African American and his mother was
Caucasian. Harold stood six feet tall with beautiful silky, naturally
curly dark hair. His smooth tan skin color was Christina’s favorite
attraction. Now married to a Puerto Rican he often wondered what
his child would look like. At any given moment, Harold was about
to find out.
He rushed back into the bedroom, there Christina lay with her
legs spread apart, and what was once water, was now blood.
Harold began to shake; he could feel his knees buckling beneath
him. He fell on the floor beside her, and held her in his arms.
Christina lay helplessly on the floor soaked in perspiration,
water and blood. In excruciating pain she whispered, “Did you call
the ambulance?”
Harold snatched the phone cord and pulled the phone off the
dresser toward him and quickly dialed 911. While he was waiting
for the person on the other end to answer, Christina screamed and
began to push. Harold dropped the receiver and rubbed her back.

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Oh, how he wished he could help her and take the pain for her.
She pushed again and yelled, “it’s coming!”
Harold rushed toward her legs and pulled her panties off to see
how far along she was, but all he could see was blood. He raced
toward the end of the bed and grabbed his shoes; he slipped on a
pair of Army fatigues and ran back toward Christina. The pain had
subsided some but was still there. “Do you think you can stand
up?” Harold asked.
“I don’t know,” said Christina. “Here, let’s try to get you on the
bed.” Harold positioned his hands under Christian’s arms, and as
he slowly raised her up blood flushed out like a water faucet.
Christina’s tan colored body began to look an ash brown color.
Christina yelled, “Harold, I feel the head!” She clutched her
stomach and gave a final push, and screamed a loud cry. As soon
as Harold looked down, he froze in shock as this tiny little body
came out covered in blood with a long cord attached to it; its head
hit the floor. Both Christina and Harold fell backwards onto the
floor and Christina began to sigh in relief. Harold began to tremble
in fear because the baby didn’t cry. Harold regained his balance,
and placed a pillow under Christina’s head. Very carefully, he
picked up the little body, reached his arms out toward the bed and
quickly pulled the sheet off. As he gently wrapped it in his arms,
he discovered it was a girl. She began to wiggle in his arms. He
then took a deep breath and blew it out as he was relieved of his
worry; his baby girl was okay. “Hello, is everything alright? Hello,
hello, hold on, help is on the way,” a voice said through the
receiver.

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Christina sat up, still in pain and eased her way onto the bed.
Harold held the baby close to her, as the umbilical cord was still
attached. As she sat in the bed he placed their new arrival in her
arms. Harold picked up the receiver and began to talk: “We have a
beautiful bouncing baby girl.” The operator had stayed on the
phone the entire time.
As Harold was talking the doorbell rang. He finished talking to
the operator, placed the phone back on the handset, and gave
Christina a warm kiss on her forehead and left the room to answer
the door. When he opened the door there stood two men in blue
uniforms with a red cross on their shoulder holding a stretcher in
their hands. Behind them, parked on the curb was an ambulance
truck with lights flashing. One of the men said, “We got an
emergency call that there was someone at this address needing
emergency care.”
“Yes sir, come this way,” Harold said, and led the men into the
bedroom where his wife and new baby girl lay.
“Congratulations!” said one of the attendants. He looked at
Christina and their new arrival and noticed that the umbilical cord
was still attached. He commanded the other attendant to get some
hot water and towels. The man nodded his head and looked toward
Harold, who led him toward the kitchen. They came back into the
bedroom with a small tub filled with warm water and towels. The
man attending to Christina reached toward Christina with his arms
positioned outward; Christina carefully placed her baby in his
arms. He took a pair of sheers out of his emergency bag and cut the
umbilical cord, then gave the baby to the other attendant. He

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placed the baby into the small tub and began to wipe her body off.
He reached into the emergency bag and pulled out a long tubing,
and began suctioning out the baby’s nose, and for the first time she
cried.
“Is she okay?” asked Christina.
“She’s fine,” the attendant said. Once he finished suctioning her
nose, he turned her upside down and gave her one spank on her
bottom; she let out a loud scream and cried uncontrollably.
Everyone in the room laughed.
“That’s my girl!” yelled Harold. Then he said, “She’s strong as
an ox.”
The attendant gave the baby to Harold to help his partner work
on Christina and positioned pillows to support her back, as she lay
back on the pillows and positioned her legs upward. The attendant
pressed down on her pelvic area and pulled out this small sack
filled with liquid and blood, and placed it in the small tub. Harold
stared in amazement as he watched everything that was happening,
while bouncing his baby girl in his arms. The attendant graciously
looked back at him with a warm smile. He cleaned Christina up,
asked his partner to hand him a hospital gown from his bag and
helped Christina put it on, then gave her some instructions. “Do
you feel like you need to go to the emergency room?” he asked.
“No,” she said. “That’s if everything is okay.”
He replied, “Yes, everything is fine, but for precaution we have
to ask.” He pulled out his clip board and began writing, then
looked up toward Harold, and asked, “so what time would you say
she was born?”

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Harold replied with a proud voice, “1:20 p.m.,” then gave the
baby back to Christina. “Is that the birth certificate you’re filling
out?” Christina asked.
“Yes it is,” he said. She then looked up toward Harold and said,
“Honey, what should we name her?”
He quickly answered as if he was already prepared: “Deniece
Eloise Bridges.” Eloise was his mother’s name. So her birth
certificate read, Deniece Eloise Bridges born March 4th 1969 at
1:20 p.m. to Christina and Harold Bridges.
Just as they were talking, a baby’s cry came from another room
across the hall. The attendant writing said, “Oh, you have another
small one in the house.”
“Yes,” answered Christina, “that’s my one year old daughter
Regina. I was wondering when she would awake, and she slept
through the whole thing.”
Harold went into her bedroom to check on her. He reached into
her baby crib and placed her into his arms. Her cries ceased as she
recognized his touch. He walked back into the room where
Christina, their new baby and the two men were.
“Hi Regina, look-you have a new baby sister; her name is
Deniece,” said Christina. Harold stood close to Christina and their
baby, and stooped down toward them so Regina could get a closer
look. As little Regina looked at the baby she made a baby’s giggle
and laughed. Everyone in the room laughed.
“Ah, she’s so cute,” said the other attendant. “Here’s your birth
certificate, and instructions on how to take care of yourself for the
next six weeks. Do you have any questions before we leave?”

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“No sir, I think we’ll be fine. As you can see we have
experience,” Christina said as she looked into her new baby’s eyes.
Harold placed Regina down on the floor and walked the two
gentlemen out the door. “Thanks for all your help,” Harold said, “I
couldn’t have done it without you.”
“You’re a brave man, congratulations,” said one of the
gentlemen.
“Thanks,” said Harold, and closed the door behind them.
When Deniece began to cry, Christina unbuttoned the first three
buttons on her night gown and pulled out one of her breasts and
placed her nipple into Deniece’s mouth. The baby began to suck on
her breast in a speedy motion. “Ouch,” said Christina, “Slow
down.” This was her first time breast-feeding. She wanted to breast
feed her oldest daughter Regina, but at the time it was more
convenient for her to bottle feed. Harold walked back into the
room with a proud look on his face. He was now a father, and his
offspring was hard at work feeding off her mother’s milk, and he
was the one who delivered her into this world.
What a beautiful sight; this was a picture perfect moment.
Harold wished he had a camera.
This moment was one of the greatest moments in his life, and
became a topic of discussion throughout his generation.

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Born to Be King

Chapter Two

The Beginning of Your Destiny

In reliving my birth I discovered I came into this world in a
hurry, born at home to a multi-cultured couple into the arms of my
biological father. On a positive note, throughout my life I sought
the approval of my natural father, and had a unique bond with him.
I’m a “daddy’s girl.” I loved and respected him deeply. To this day
I’m a mover and a shaker, always in a hurry to get things done. I
am not a procrastinator. I’m quick to obey the voice of the Lord
and seek His approval. I am culturally diverse. I can hold a
conversation with anyone of a different background. I have no
rhythm, but I am very creative and have the strength of an ox. I
love colors and enjoy all of God’s finest foods cooked in a variety
of ways. Just like falling to the floor and hitting my head at birth
without crying, God has equipped me to stand against all odds and
break through every barrier without a scratch. My natural father
received me into his arms and blessed me from the very beginning.
And guess what? The same is true for you. Even if your natural

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father wasn’t there, you have to believe in your heart that your
heavenly Father was there. If He weren’t, you could have been
aborted.
On a negative note, the devil was standing right beside my
mother while she was giving birth to me, desiring to take my life.
Satan knew God’s plan for my life, and sought to kill me by
thrusting my head against a hard wood floor hoping the blow to the
head would destroy me or cause major brain damage. But instead, I
withstood the blow, and live to testify today that with the Lord on
my side I am more than a conqueror. What the enemy failed to
realize is God had angels positioned ready to help and aid me in
delivery, whispering into my father’s ear telling him what to do
next. And you too had an angel at your birth, and that angel is still
with you today.
At Christmas time I love to watch the movie Scrooge. Scrooge
was a wealthy old man who owned a business in a small town. But
he was very selfish, stingy and mean, and he hated Christmas.
Everyone in town knew of his reputation and would try to avoid
him. But one day while he was asleep, a friendly ghost visited him,
woke him from his sleep and took him on a trip into the future to
visit people he had been mean to. As they arrived to each home,
they would look through the windows and see the pain in the lives
of people caused by this evil old man. When the friendly ghost
returned him back to his home, Scrooge had learned a valuable
lesson, and changed his mind about Christmas. He made a point to
visit those whom he had been mean to and gave them gifts, and
gave raises to his employees. Everyone in town was amazed at his

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change of heart, and couldn’t believe this was the same man. From
watching this movie, I discovered that even the meanest person is
assigned an angel. It is God’s desire to reach the hearts of
everyone.
From the very beginning God has released His angels to stand
along your side throughout your entire life to see that His purpose
for your life is accomplished. So the question is: have you called
on your angels today to help aid you in your life? Have you prayed
out to the Lord and asked Him to guide you in your purpose? If
not, let’s begin today.
Let’s consider our Heavenly Father and the birth of His Son
Jesus. Revelation 12:3 says, “And another sign appeared in
heaven: behold, a great, fiery red dragon having seven heads and
ten horns, and seven diadems on his heads. His tail drew a third of
the stars of heaven and threw them to the earth. And the dragon
stood before the woman who was ready to give birth, to devour her
child as soon as it was born.”
The attempt of the dragon to devour the newborn child reveals
that the strategy of Herod to kill the baby Jesus was satanically
inspired by Satan himself (ref NKJV). Matthew 2:1-16 says, “Now
after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod
the king, behold wise men from the East came to Jerusalem,
saying, Where is He who has been born King of the Jews? For we
have seen His star in the East and have come to worship Him.
When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all
Jerusalem with him. And when he had gathered all the chief priests
and scribes of the people together, he inquired of them where the

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Christ was to be born. So they said to him, In Bethlehem of Judea,
for thus it is written by the prophet. But you, Bethlehem, in the
land of Judah, are not the least among the rulers of Judah; for out
of you shall come a Ruler Who will shepherd My people Israel.”
Then Herod, when he had secretly called the wise men, determined
from them what time the star appeared. And he sent them to
Bethlehem and said, “Go and search carefully for the young Child,
and when you have found Him, bring back word to me, that I may
come and worship Him also.” When they heard the king, they
departed; and behold, the star which they had seen in the East went
before them, till it came and stood over where the young Child
was. When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceedingly great
joy. And when they had come into the house, they saw the young
Child with Mary His mother, and fell down and worshiped Him.
And when they had opened their treasures, they presented gifts to
Him: gold, frankincense, and myrrh. Then, being divinely warned
in a dream that they should not return to Herod, they departed for
their own country another way. Now when they had departed,
behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream,
saying, “Arise, take the young Child and His mother, flee to Egypt,
and stay there until I bring you word; for Herod will seek the
young Child to destroy Him.” When he arose, he took the young
Child and His mother by night and departed for Egypt, and was
there until the death of Herod that it might be fulfilled which was
spoken by the Lord through the prophet saying, “Out of Egypt I
called My Son.” Then Herod, when he saw that he was deceived
by the wise men, was exceedingly angry; and he sent forth and put

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to death all the male children who were in Bethlehem and in all its
districts, from two years old and under, according to the time
which he had determined from the wise men.”
Jesus’ birth meant trouble for Satan and his kingdom; therefore
he sought to kill Him before He could even get a chance to speak
His first words. Satan also knew the bond that Jesus and His Father
shared. “Born King of the Jews,” These words struck terror and
fury into the heart of Herod. King Herod killed every male child
two years old and under to make sure he would kill baby Jesus.
Yet, through God’s divine intervention, King Herod’s attempt
failed. Five dreams of divine guidance emphasize God’s
orchestration of these perilous events (ref NKJV).
God went through extreme measures to protect His Son.
Angels were positioned around and during the birth of baby Jesus.
In obedience to God, Joseph and Mary’s life was interrupted and
changed forever; they were forced to live in a foreign country.
Can you imagine the stress level this may have caused them? Mary
had to quiet baby Jesus at certain times in order to protect his life.
She had to go to the market with Him wrapped tightly, praying that
no one would want to play with or touch Him. Joseph and Mary’s
pride level had to drop to zero; they couldn’t tell a soul about their
new arrival’s purpose or name. The King of the Jews was born to
save the world and God chose this couple to bring in the greatest
gift to the world, all to be revealed at a specific time. Knowing this
they remained silent, for too much was at stake. God wasn’t going
to let anyone or anything interrupt His plan He designed for His
Son’s destiny.

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To make a long story short Jesus’ life was protected, and He
reached His destiny. Hebrews 12:2 says, “Looking unto Jesus, the
author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before
Him endured the cross despising the shame, and has sat down at
the right hand of the throne of God.” God chose Him to show the
world His glory, to show the world love, joy, peace, longsuffering,
kindness, gentleness, faith, hope and patience. Through many
trials, tribulations, pains and hurts, Jesus endured and finished His
race. And when it was time for Him to lay down His life to die for
our sins, love was manifested in its most perfect form just for you
and me. God then took His most precious gift and ascended it back
to heaven to sit at the right hand of His throne. He sits with His
Father in His glorified body with the nail prints in His hands and
feet, waiting until you and I meet him face to face. Thank you
Father for the birth and life of your Son; teach us how to love Him
the way You do.
As you have read, Jesus’ birth was unique, and His life was the
most valuable life that was ever born to this earth. I have shared
with you His beginnings as well as mine to help you discover
yours. By reliving your birth, you too can begin to understand your
purpose. You too may have something in your birth that is unique,
and as you discover what your beginning was, you will begin to
discover your birth was the beginning of your destiny. You will
also discover why you do things the way you do, and how God’s
divine providence protected your life.

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Take a moment to relive your birth. If your parents are living
ask them to explain to you your birth in detail, and answer the
following questions:
Where were you born?
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What is the meaning of your name?
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What is your nickname?
___________________________________________
Why were you named this nickname?
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If you were to rename yourself, what would your new name be,
and what is the meaning of it?
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Are you named after a member of your family? If yes, what is their
character like?
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Did both parents raise you? If not who raised you?
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What were some of your struggles while growing up?
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Do you like to be around people? Yes _________ or No ________
Do you like to speak in front of people? Yes ______ or No ______

Now pray this prayer with me

“Father in the Name of Jesus I pray for your anointing to fall on
my life; anoint every gift, anoint every person who will come in
contact with me. Close every door that needs to be closed and open
every door that needs to be opened. Give me wisdom and
knowledge through Your Word that I may apply it daily. Call me
to the things that are mine and show me how to capture every
dream and take by force all things that belong to me. In Jesus’
name I pray. Amen.”

Now you are ready for step two.

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The Secret is Out

Chapter Three

Character Unthawed

Your memory is the sharpest at the age of five. Not only that,
but at this age you obtained information at a fast pace and asked
many questions concerning your surroundings. And the enemy is
once again quick at work to try and destroy you while your thought
process is being developed. Through my own experience, let me
explain.
By the time I was five years old my mother Christina and father
had given birth to three more children. My father became very
frustrated with working long hours trying to make ends meet.
Being enlisted in the Armed Forces made things more difficult,
and it seemed like every time he was home on leave, Christina
would become pregnant. He would return to duty having to ask for
a promotion and look for other ways to make money. His family
was in great need, he could no longer keep the duplex apartment
we were living in, and he had a difficult time finding a new place
for us to live. However, he was determined to find us shelter since

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being outdoors was not a part of his plan. Due to only one income
he was forced to rent a tiny three bedroom apartment in one of the
nastiest projects in Chicago. The complex was infested with rats
the size of cats, and roaches were everywhere. Oh, how he hated to
leave his family in such ruins. But he thought to himself at least it
wasn’t outdoors, and decided to make the best of it.
Christina on the other hand became resentful and complained
every waking moment-the responsibilities of motherhood were
getting the best of her. Five children and a husband in the armed
forces was not what she intended for herself in life. My father
would send money home to her every month, but unfortunately she
would waste it on meaningless things trying to satisfy her
emotions. The small amounts of food she brought home would
only last for a week. Two children in pampers were getting
expensive. This once happy family was beginning to fall apart.
Harold would often call home only to discover that she was
never there. Instead I would answer, “Hi daddy, I miss you.”
He would answer, “Is that my Niecy?” This was a nickname he
had given me.
“Yes daddy, it’s me.” I always knew what was to follow.
He would reply, “Is mommy home?”
I would always answer, “No.” I could feel the disappointment
in his voice. Oh, how I wished he were home, and so would he.
The phones were soon shut off for non-payment. Consequently,
hearing my daddy’s voice and waiting for the phone to ring ended.
My mother was never at home: where she would spend her time,
no one knew. I became the baby sitter and taught myself how to

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cook hot dogs and make syrup sandwiches, tea and cheese toast.
Milk was rarely in the house and my baby brother would often cry
for his bottle. I would fill it with water, but the plain taste wouldn’t
satisfy or ease his hunger pains: instead he would throw it down on
the floor and cry uncontrollably. I didn’t know what to do, I was
afraid to ask the neighbors for help. Before my mother would leave
home, she would always threaten me by saying, “Never answer the
door, or go outside: if you do, DCFS (Department of Children’s
Family Services) is going to come and take you away, and you will
never see each other again.” With those words in mind, I would try
to keep my brothers and sisters quiet. My stepsister Regina was the
oldest but the laziest. Instead of helping she would always cry out
to me for everything, and I had to do it all: change pampers, cook,
pick up after my brothers and sisters, and find ways to entertain
them. I remember one incident as if it were yesterday: my baby
brother was crying so hard he became red and his navel would
stand out. His stomach was swollen: I began to cry and said to
myself, “Oh God! What am I going to do? He won’t be quiet and
he looks sick.” At the age of five I remember saying, “Lord help
me.” At that moment, I picked up his bottle and put some water in
it and looked at the sugar jar, and something inside me said put
some sugar in the water. I did so, and gave it to my brother. Guess
what? He drank it and stopped crying. Oh how relieved I was, I
will never forget that day. For months he survived off of sugar and
water. Thank you Jesus.
One day someone became suspicious. I remember one of our
neighbors coming over asking my mother questions. She made up

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stories about her being home and said we were just being loud and
noisy kids. Unfortunately the neighbor believed her, and my
mother was never questioned again. My mother began to act
strange toward us and became abusive. She would always hit my
brother Harold, Jr. I would say to myself, “Why is she acting like
this? What did we do?” Regina was her favorite: she would take
her with her, and I would be left in the house to take care of my
brothers and other sister. Regina would come home bragging to us
about where she had been.
I cried so much on my pillows at night until my face became
scaled and flaky. Oh, how I wished my daddy were home. I would
pray every night for months begging God to send my father home.
Although we’d never been to church, from watching TV I would
often hear somebody mention God, or watch movies with people
sitting on long benches in a tall building with a sharply pointed
roof with a big cross on it. They would begin shouting as a man
stood behind a wooden stand with a microphone in his hand
shouting, “If the Lord’s done anything good for you, you ought to
shout amen!”
And they would do as he commanded, and I would always
shout “Amen” with them. At the age of five, God became my best
friend, and I would often daydream and wish that I could see Him
face to face.
My prayers were finally answered. My mother said, “Your
daddy’s coming home. Are you satisfied?”
“Well I am,” she continued, “because I’m tired, I can’t do this
anymore.” I remained quiet as I listened trembling, afraid she

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might strike at any moment. She packed her and Regina’s bags and
grabbed the rest of our coats.
“Hurry up-put these on, he’ll be home soon.”
I was thinking to myself, “If he’s coming home then why is she
packing and putting our coats on?”
Then my imagination ran wild. Maybe daddy is coming to take
us away from here. So I asked my mom, “Are we moving?”
“I don’t know, and I don’t care,” she said, as she continued to
pack her and Regina’s things. That’s when a knot developed in my
stomach. I felt sick as if I was about to throw up, and I felt a
strange sense of separation. My mother finished packing and put
their things into the car: that’s when I knew that my other sister,
brothers and I weren’t going with her. She yelled, “Niecy, go get
Joseph: Harold, Jr. and Lou come out here, now!” We hurried out
of the house as she told us to sit on the front porch.
“Oh no!” I said to myself. “It’s freezing out here, what is she
doing?” She looked at me and said, “Niecy, I’m sorry, you may not
understand now, but some day I hope you will.” She said, “Me
amour (I love you).” And she left.
“Mama, Mama, Mama!” I cried! And she never came back. I
wrapped my baby brother in my coat and rocked him to sleep, and
asked my dear friend God to please send my daddy home quickly.
My friend then blew warm air on us in the midst of the cold.
Thank you God, thank you.
A few hours later my dad drove up, I was so glad to see him.
“Daddy, Daddy, Daddy,” we all yelled! Tears streamed down his
face. His fatherly instincts had warned him that something was

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wrong. I didn’t have to say a word, he knew she was gone. My
friend had once again answered my prayers. He wrapped us into
his arms and held us close to his warm body. We all hopped into
his blue 1972 Impala.

One Unforgettable Night

My father later remarried and things began to improve. Our new
mother was very loving, as she did not have children of her own.
She loved us as if we were her own. But we would often talk about
Christina and Regina wondering what they were doing and if we
would ever see them again. Later we learned not to mention their
names too much, as this was a subject our stepmother didn’t want
to hear. Money was still scarce. My father was discharged from the
service and finding a job was very difficult. Our new mother was
forced to work outside the home and had to work long hours to
help make ends meet. Once again I was left to baby sit, and
became a pro at it. Still at the age of five I often wondered, why
me? Our new mother had to work night shifts to get extra pay. So
she decided to ask her brother to baby sit us, as she would feel
guilty about leaving us alone at night. My father found a job and
also worked night shifts. That’s when the worst of my troubles
began.
“Hey kids come in here, I’m going to be your baby sitter. These
are the rules, I don’t want no mess out of you all, or else,” said
Uncle Pete. We all looked at each other with confusion. A part of
me wanted to shout for joy as I thought now I can be a kid and play

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outside with the other children. But another part of me didn’t trust
him. He would often look at me while licking his lips and say,
“You sure are a pretty girl, what color did your daddy say yo’
mama was?” I would quickly drop my head toward the floor and
detested the way he looked at me.
Every night before going to bed, with laughter and joy we
would jump up and down in our beds throwing pillows across the
room, and with every leap I would feel like we didn’t have a worry
in the world. Until one night Uncle Pete pushed in our bedroom
door and screamed in a lazy slurred speech, “What ya’ll doin, stop
all dat noise.” At the sound of his voice we instantly stopped
jumping and turned toward him. “Neicy, get o’er over here, now!”
I slowly jumped down from the bed; the closer I got to him I
could smell this awful smell of whiskey coming off of his body.
He grabbed me tightly around the arm and turned the lights off and
told the other children to go to bed.
“Uncle Pete, you’re hurting me,” I said as he pulled my arm and
dragged me down the hallway.
“Shut up,” he snapped and shoved me into one of the other
bedrooms and threw me hard onto the bed. He began to look at me
strangely, again licking his lips. I sat up in the bed, and my heart
began to pound as if it was going to come out of my chest.
I looked up at him trembling with fear and said, “Uncle Pete I
promise I won’t do it again, please don’t hurt me.”
“Don’t talk back to me!” He yelled and raised one of his hands
and slapped me across my face throwing my 44-pound body across

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the bed and onto the floor. He walked over to the television set,
turned it on and turned up the volume.
Lying on the floor with my face in my hands I began crying
saying, “I want my daddy, I want my daddy.”
“Shut up!” he screamed as he raced back toward me and pulled
me up by both hands and slammed my body hard onto the bed.
And with all my might I began to scream as loud as I could, but the
television set was overriding my voice. He pounced on top of me,
placed his hand over my mouth, unbuckled his pants and did the
unthinkable. He raped me.
His breath reeked with alcohol and sounded heavy as he took
short breaths pounding hard against my body. For a few seconds
my mind went blank, and I felt nothing. My body felt numb and
limp. I lay there wishing that none of this were happening. I gazed
into space wondering what I had done that was so horrible for him
to do this to me.
After he finished he got up and buckled his pants, and said, “If
you tell anyone, I’ll kill you, and besides you’re not my real niece
anyway. Get up.”
I couldn’t move. I couldn’t even raise my head. He pulled me
up off the bed and noticed blood on the sheet. He quickly wrapped
the sheet up and placed it under his arm. My legs felt weak, but I
found enough strength to stand. I looked down and noticed that my
underwear was torn and soaked in blood. I remember asking
myself why he did this to me. He strolled me down the hallway
into the bathroom, ran some water in the bathtub, stripped me of
my long pajama top and bloody underwear and placed me in the

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tub. He found a plastic bag under the counter, took the sheet from
under his arm along with my underwear and placed it in the bag.
“Hurry and wash up and come into the kitchen when you’re
finished,” he said.
As soon as he exited the bathroom, I placed my hands on my
jaw and slowly moved it up and down. The pain in my jaw hurt so
bad I thought it was broken. I set in the cool water looking for my
friend God; I raised my head up toward the ceiling and asked,
“Where are you? Can you see me?” I began to cry.
I finished bathing myself and dried myself off; I was in
excruciating pain. With his words, “If you tell anyone, I’ll kill
you,” in my mind, I remained silent and told no one. This remained
my secret for years.
I eased my way into the kitchen where he was standing over the
stove making some tea. He turned toward me while pulling the
oven’s door down and turned it on. He reached across the room
and pulled a chair close to the oven’s door. He said, “Here, sit in
this chair and have some tea, get nice and warm then you can go to
bed.” He looked me over to see if he had done some damage. “Ah,
you’ll be alright,” he stated as he turned toward the kitchen sink,
got a cup and poured some tea into it and placed it in my hand. I
sat there hating I was born, hating my life, and hating my birth
mother.
That night made me into an angry, bitter little girl. Every time
my uncle would become angry or have too much to drink, he
would take me into that room, turn up the volume on the television
and do the same thing over again. I had become his rag doll to do

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with me whatever he pleased. I began to wet the bed and would
suffer with constipation, and when my bowels did move, they
would move too fast to give me enough warning, soiling my
underwear. And this would always happen while at school. I was
too embarrassed to tell anyone, but the stench would raise a
question. I would ask to go to the bathroom and would throw my
underwear away. The other children in the classroom would point
toward me and make fun of me. That’s when I began to lie, and say
it wasn’t me, and put the blame on someone else. And their
attention would quickly turn away from me toward the other
person. That’s when I discovered the power in a lie. I became a
habitual liar. I lied when I became fearful, I lied about my birth
mother, I lied about us living in a different place. If attention were
coming toward me in any way, I would make up a lie just to get the
attention off me not caring who I hurt, even my brothers and sister.
One day something happened and our uncle was asked not to
baby sit us again. “Thank you,” I said to my friend God. The day
he left I made my friend God my best friend and would often talk
to Him whenever I pleased. Occasionally someone would see me
talking to my invisible friend and comment about it. I would just
smile and quiet myself and wink with one eye at my friend and go
on about my business. I quickly discovered that people would not
understand my relationship with my friend and decided to speak to
Him when no one was around. And to this day I still speak to my
friend.
This incident made me bitter but it also brought me closer to
God, and from then on when I got into trouble, speaking to Him

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and Him answering my prayers made me into a believer. You too
may have experienced trauma in the early years of your life as I
have. They were meant for you to get close with God and look to
the hills, from which comes your help. Yes, even at the age of five.
The devil intended for me to be broken into pieces and thrown
away hoping I would be forgotten. But God has proved him to be
wrong again. I am still here, writing books about my experiences
and spreading the gospel to all nations because my best friend is
still with me. You have the same privilege. If you’ve lived a hard,
miserable life it is because the enemy knew that your life posed a
threat to his kingdom. So he decided to stand next to your mother
while giving birth, to snatch her seed. He puts snares and obstacles,
rejections and pains in our way from the very beginning. And
guess what? He never quits; these struggles remain throughout our
entire lives. But God kept you alive in spite of your trials,
obstacles, miseries and pains to show the enemy that you are more
than a conqueror.
Through my horrible experience, my character was revealed. I
loved to believe in what I could not see. I didn’t know then, but I
know now that is called faith. Because of my destiny, God wanted
me to know from the beginning who He was so I would never
doubt Him. And my faith had to be stretched to its limits because
of the obstacles I must confront in order to be used for the
kingdom of God. The Bible says, without faith it is impossible to
please God. No matter what happened to me, He was there.
Maybe God knew that if I didn’t have such a difficult life, I would
have never turned toward Him the way I did and call Him my best

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friend. Through many trials and tribulations, when I couldn’t
depend on my biological parents, I could depend on God. Even at
the age of five, He communicated with me in a way that only I
could understand, just to let me know that He was there.
The Bible doesn’t reveal to us Jesus’ fifth birthday but the Bible
does reveal to us His twelfth year, which we will discuss in the
next chapter. But you can rest assured that Joseph and Mary went
through extreme measures protecting Him. I believe Mary didn’t
depend on others to take care of her child. He was the Savior of the
world, a precious gift given to her by God Himself. She loved
Him, and she knew His purpose even before He was born. God
chooses certain parents for certain children to make up his perfect
gift He wants to present to the world.
If you are a parent, I urge you to love your gift from God.
Protect and cherish it. Circumstances today don’t always allow us
to be home with our children; we are forced to depend on others to
help care for them. It is our duty to investigate those who are
helping with our children, including relatives. Remember that God
trusts you to protect His gift. Ask plenty of questions, ask for
references and have background checks done. Your child is too
precious to be thrown into the hands of an abuser. If you too were
a child who was a victim of abuse use your experience to warn
others. Pay attention to gestures and the ways that your child or
someone else’s is being touched. God has given you discernment
in this area. You are able to detect an abuser, and when in doubt
the answer is always, no. If you have been abused, God needs you
in His Kingdom to warn parents to help them protect their gift. In

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today’s society the hustle and bustle of the world keeps us so busy
until this area is often left with little concern. The enemy wants
you so busy that you work harder in your jobs and busy routines,
rather than what’s more important-your gift, your babies, your
cherished ones. God has entrusted you with their lives. What a
responsibility, but also what a joy. No one is perfect and we all
make mistakes, just do your best and ask God for help. It’s never
too late to keep trying over and over again. The powerful tool of
love will change any circumstance.
Find your character in your circumstances, and rather than
become bitter you should become useful. Forgive all those who
hurt you, and ask your friend God to deliver and save their souls.

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Truth Revealed

Chapter Four

Dreams Unthawed

Later my father’s job moved us to Fort Worth, Texas into a
beautiful home to call our own. At the age of nine, I finally asked
my friend God the question: “Friend, is God your name or do you
have another name?”
Later my parents converted their faith to Jehovah Witnesses. In
the beginning I was excited because I had asked God for His real
name, and through their teachings I learned His name was Jehovah.
He had a Son named Jesus whom they referred to as being just
another man. I would look at Jesus’ picture in a Jehovah’s Witness
Paradise book nailed to a stake with blood running down His arms
and wonder, why did this happen to Him? When I read the story it
would mention His birth, His mother and father Mary and Joseph,
the three wise men, His twelve disciples, and Him as being a great
teacher. It even mentioned His death. But it never mentioned
salvation, or the real reason why He died. That’s when confusion
about our faith began to unsettle with my spirit. I raised a lot of

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questions but no one could answer them, including my parents. In
fact they taught us to never call on Jesus’ name. We were taught to
only use Jehovah’s name.
“Why would God let this happen to Him? Was this all for
nothing?” I would ask. So I decided to ask my best friend now
named Jehovah, who was Jesus, and why did He die? My friend
remained quiet on this subject until two years later.
At the age of eleven, we went to my Grandmother’s house on
one of our visits to Chicago. Like all of our other visits she would
wait until my parents left and would put some oil on her hands,
wipe it on our foreheads and begin to pray this long prayer. But
this time was different: she kept saying Jesus’ name over and over
again. I said to myself, “Wow, she must know who He is, maybe I
can ask her.”
“Grandmamma, can you tell me who Jesus is?” I asked.
All of a sudden out of nowhere she began to jump up and down
and started yelling, “Thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus.” I looked
at my brothers and sister and asked is she alright, but they seemed
to be uninterested and went outside to play.
She continued on with her jumping and yelling for what
appeared to be a very long time. Finally she calmed down and sat
in a chair, gasping for breaths of air. Come here she waved, let me
show you something. She opened up her Bible and turned to John
1:1-3; 14 and it read, “In the beginning was the Word, and the
Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the
beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and
without Him nothing was made that was made. And the Word

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became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the
glory of the only begotten of the Father full of grace and truth.”
She said, “Now listen to me very closely. God is the Word, and the
Word was with God since the beginning when God made the
heavens and the earth and all creation through His Word. He
wrapped His word up in flesh, which is His body born to a woman
named Mary and named Himself Jesus. This was the only way he
could live with His people so they could see His glory through
miracles, signs and wonders He performed without them becoming
afraid, and He taught them how to love one another.”
As she was explaining this to me my heart began to pitter-patter
and a warm feeling came over me. Tears began to fall from my
eyes. She looked at me first with concern but then she smiled and
said, “I know honey, the same thing happened to me.”
“Grandmamma, if the Word is God and the Word is Jesus then
that makes Him God.”
“Yes it does honey,” she said. “Oh no!” I said, and began crying
even harder. “We believe in something that’s not true. We believe
Jesus is dead and he is not God. We can’t even say His name.
What am I going to do? I have to warn my parents.” I began to cry
uncontrollably: she handed me some tissues, I wiped my face and
looked at her.
She went on to say, “That’s not all. Jesus allowed people to
treat Him cruel and mean: he even let them kill Him in order to
save our lives.” “I don’t understand, how can somebody who is
dead save someone who is alive?” I asked. She went on to say,
“That’s it honey, He is not dead, he’s alive.”

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She knew how much I loved the Bible, and how much I loved
to talk to my invisible friend. Although she never expressed it, I
believe she knew that God was going to use me to work in His
Kingdom. Her long wrinkled slender fingers turned the pages of
her Bible to John 20:11-18 and it read, “But Mary stood outside by
the tomb weeping, and as she wept she stooped down and looked
into the tomb. And she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the
head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain.
Then they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?” She said
to them, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not
know where they have laid Him.” Now when she had said this, she
turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that
it was Jesus.” Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?
Whom are you seeking?” She, supposing Him to be a gardener,
said to Him, “Sir, if You have carried Him away, tell me where
You have laid Him, and I will take Him away.” Jesus said to her,
“Mary!” She turned and said to Him, “Rabboni!” (which is to say,
teacher). Jesus said to her, “Do not cling to Me, for I have not yet
ascended to My Father; but go to My brethren and say to them, I
am ascending to My Father and your Father, and to My God and
your God.” Mary Magdalene came and told the disciples that she
had seen the Lord, and that He had spoken these things to her.”
After reading this I was in total shock. I sat back in my chair
stunned and said, “Grandmamma, Jesus is alive and He lives in
heaven with His Father. Is He still alive today?”
“Yes, He is, and He also lives in you.”

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“Grandmamma, if Jesus is God then who is His Father? Is His
Father also God? Do we have two God’s?” I asked.
“No, honey, there is just one God: you see, God can be
everywhere at once. While he was busy working in heaven, at the
same time He was busy being God on earth as Jesus just to save us.
That’s just how much He loves us.” She explained that His
majesty, His power and what He is capable of doing cannot be
compared to human living.
Everything began to make sense to me. I asked, “Grandmamma,
what does it mean to be saved?” She explained, “After Adam and
Eve sinned in the Garden things became very bad for us, man
began to sin and do wicked things in the eyes of God. Our sins
caused us to be separated from God. Because of God’s holiness,
the only thing that could bring us back to Him was a blood
sacrifice, which meant something had to die. When Jesus died on
the cross, His death represented a spotless lamb offered up to the
Lord as a sacrificial offering. And by His stripes we are healed,
and by His sacrifice we are saved into the kingdom of God. One
day we will live with Him in heaven and see Him for ourselves.
He committed no sins, and did no wrong. His main purpose for
coming to earth was to bring us back to God and save us from this
mean, hateful world.” She went on to say, “But for now, you are
able to speak to Him anytime you please, kind of like your
invisible friend,” she smiled.
With excitement I said, “But Grandmamma my friend is real.
He speaks to me in different ways and He answers my prayers.”

44 Frozen Dreams
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Then all of a sudden it dawned on me, everything she had told me
was true. He is alive and He lives in me.
I said, “No one will ever believe me, how do I explain this to
them.”
She rubbed her hand across my hair and smiled and said, “My
child all you have to do is introduce Him to them and Jesus will do
the rest. Kind of like what I have done for you today.” Now repeat
after me, and together we said, “Lord Jesus, please come into my
heart, and forgive me for my sins, I believe that You died for me,
and rose again with all power in Your hands. Amen.”
“There, you are now saved into the royal Kingdom of the Lord,
and shall meet Him face to face,” she said.
About one month later my grandmother died. Oh, how I missed
her, especially now when I had so many new questions to ask.
Something inside me began to melt. What was once cold as ice and
hard as a rock was turning soft and warm. The Lord had taken my
stony heart and turned it into flesh. I became compassionate and
wanted to please God like never before. I had learned the truth and
couldn’t wait to tell the world. I thought things would get better
with this good news I had to share but instead they grew worse.
Every time I tried to tell someone this good news, they would ask
me to be quiet, or say, “don’t let your parents hear you talk like
that.” So I would go to my friend, now in His new name. To me
His first name was Jehovah and last name was Jesus. I would say,
“Jehovah Jesus, Why doesn’t anyone want to hear about you? And
I hate having to be quiet, and I hate standing on the corner every
Saturday with these magazines: they don’t tell the truth about

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you.” But when I would ask these questions my friend would
remain quiet. Then I remember asking Him if He was sad about
this. And for the first time I heard Him weep. And tears began to
roll down my face.
For some reason our parents love for us was beginning to feel
different. Being the oldest I was often left in charge of my brothers
and sister when our parents weren’t home. We would do the
normal kids stuff and play with our toys or go outside to ride our
bikes. Until one day my parents came down hard on us with strict
rules: we weren’t allowed to play outside the yard anymore nor
ride our bikes off the block. We were never allowed phone calls,
but at least we could go next door to play with the neighbor’s
children. Now that was forbidden. What had we done?
School became our only outlet. We became the smartest
children in the school district. My brother Harold, Jr. and I would
make straight A’s and would rush home with excitement about our
report cards. I remember us going into the principal’s office to be
tested and because of our high I Q scores we were advanced to the
next grade. My parent’s were praised on our efforts and were often
asked how they got us to be so interested in school. Reading books
was one of my favorite hobbies. I would find a quiet space and
read as often as I could. The Jehovah’s Witnesses were talking of
the world ending soon and we were taught not to invest in the
world or save money for the future, but instead to live each day as
if it were our last. My parents took that literally and did just as the
elders commanded. Not investing in the world to them meant only
buying necessities; name brand clothes were out of the question.

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Popular items were looked at as being worldly and materialistic
and not spiritual. We would go to school and see children step out
of their parent’s luxury cars dressed in name brand clothing and
wish we were them. I thought to myself, “Why change the rules
now?” Our home was beautiful, and we lived in a nice
neighborhood. Were those things now considered sins? Will we
have to move?
The more involved my parents were in the Jehovah’s Witnesses
faith the more strict they became. My father was determined to
protect us from the world and he took this assignment to the
extreme. There were no balance, it was strictly Jehovah,
Watchtowers and Awake magazines and field service. Television
was not allowed. We were forced to live this make believe perfect
life we could not live up to. Things I used to get praised for
became useless. My parent’s expectations were too high for me to
reach, and now I could never please them. I stayed in trouble and
would always be on punishment. I was labeled as being a habitual
liar and people were told not to trust me. My life was beginning to
fall apart. I began to think of ways to kill myself. On the way to
school while sitting in the back seat of the car I would attempt to
open the car door while on the highway so I could jump out hoping
a car would run me over, but the safety locks were always on. I
became withdrawn and isolated myself. The only friend I had was
God, and He is the only reason I survived.
Surviving through your trials and tribulations is not for your
own pleasure but for the pleasure and Glory of God. If you’ve
found yourself in these similar situations or have felt like I once

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did, then this scripture applies to you. Romans 8:37-39 says, “Yet
in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who
loved us. For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels
nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to
come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be
able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus
our Lord.” You are more than a conqueror, and cannot be
separated from the love of God. As it was for me the same applies
for you. The safety lock that was on to protect you from hurt, harm
and danger is called God’s grace.
The greater your obstacle, the greater your blessing. To help
you discover your character answer the following questions.
Where do you currently work?
______________________________________________________
What is your job description?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Can you see this job as your career?
Yes_______ No _______
Do you believe that God has called you to this job?
Yes _______ No _______

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______________________________________________________
If you answered No to the last two questions then why are you
working at that job or in that field?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Do you like your current job? If yes, why?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
What are your hobbies?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
What things do you like to do in your spare time?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Do you like to read? If yes what types of books?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Who is your favorite author?
______________________________________________________

______________________________________________________
Make a list of everything that comes to you naturally that does not
require a lot of work.
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Have you ever been convicted of a crime or done something you
know should have gotten you convicted but somehow you escaped
punishment? Please explain in detail.
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Is your character like your father or your mother?
_____________________________________
Which parent are you close to?
_____________________________________
Are you a daydreamer? Yes _______ No _______
Are you a procrastinator? Yes _____ No _______
Do you get things done quickly? Yes _______ No _______
Are you a leader or a follower? ____________________________

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______________________________________________________
Now look through your answers and pick out every gift or
hobby and all things that come to you naturally and ask God to
anoint those gifts and talents.
The questions you have just answered apply to your character.
Who you are and what has been passed down to you through your
bloodline or generational curses. If the questions you have just
answered are not appealing to you, or you detect generational
curses that may have attached themselves to you, pray this prayer
with me: “Father in the name of Jesus I come up against every
generational curse, I bind the enemy right now in the name of
Jesus and command him to flee and never return. Lord I stand on
Your word: everything that the enemy means for bad I ask that you
would turn it around for my good. Show me through your word
how to break free from the claws of the enemy and press toward
my destiny. Lead and guide me that I may know that it is your
hand protecting me from all hurts, harm and danger. In Jesus’
name I pray. Amen.”
You have the power to change your life and turn it around so
that you may become prosperous and live life abundantly. Your
character and your nature come from God. You cannot change that,
but work them for your good. Use your character to the best of
your advantage. If you are an outgoing and courageous person, you
have the ability to conquer and triumph, therefore you are a leader
and can lead leaders. Use your courageous personality to possess,
dominate and claim territory, and don’t be afraid to take chances.
Faith and trust play an important part in this person’s life.

______________________________________________________
The danger in having this type of character is obtaining too
much at one time. Without wisdom and knowledge from God, this
type of person can have tremendous downfalls that can keep them
from recovering. It is vital to your future that you read your Word
daily, and remain faithful and pray daily for wisdom. God honors
faithfulness.
If you are one whose life is headed for doom and destruction,
you have the power to change it right now in the name of Jesus.
The devil is a liar; your trials and tribulations are designed to
strengthen you and equip you for what’s to come. That same
tenacious, bold and daring spirit that caused you to get into trouble
can be used for your advantage. Put it in the spirit, and use it for
the kingdom of God. God is looking for people who are not afraid
to fight. The Bible says the people of violence ought to take it by
force. You can forcefully snatch back from the enemy all that was
stolen by never giving up and demanding your goods. A people of
violence in the spirit means prayer warriors, those who are not
afraid to stand on the front lines of the battlefield and help fight for
those who are wounded. In the army of the Lord, there are
positions and levels we must obtain in order to reach our goals and
our destiny. If you are chosen to be a squad leader (a person who
ranks or rules over a small group of people in his/her section) then
be the best leader you know how to be to your squad, and don’t try
and lead someone else’s. When at war, know when to call for a
cease-fire and know when to fight. I would choose a tenacious and
bold person to become a member of my team before one who’s

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______________________________________________________
fearful or too sweet. When your life is in danger or in jeopardy,
you need a fighter.
Don’t be afraid to be yourself, your personality and your
character came from God. God accepts you just the way you are.
Have no fear, He will shape and mold you for His kingdom.
To all those who have lived dangerous and hard lives, the
kingdom of God needs you. Don’t be afraid or ashamed of your
past, instead stand and let the enemy know that you are now on the
Lord’s side. Pray this prayer with me: “Lord, please forgive me of
my sins, and come into my heart. I believe that you died for my
sins and rose again on the third day that I might live. Save me
Jesus and guide every day of my life. Use me for your kingdom, in
Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
You have just accepted Jesus into your heart and are saved.
From this day forward your life has changed, and God has thrown
your past sins into the sea of forgetfulness. You have been given a
second chance, and have been given the right to inherit the
kingdom of God.
Beware, the devil is angry-he is going to put up a fight and
come up against you. But know this, you are not in this fight alone.
When you accepted Jesus into your heart, God released angels
from His heavenly kingdom to stand and fight with you. There is a
cloud of witnesses in heaven cheering you on, and coaching you.
They have one goal in mind and that’s to see that you make it to
the finish line.
To better understand your salvation here are the key terms of
your salvation.

______________________________________________________

The Key Terms of Salvation

(NKJV Romans reference guide)
Faith (Romans 1:17;4:9;12:6) “Belief trust:” faith is the means by
which sinful people can experience and enjoy all the blessings of
salvation. It is a complete trust in Jesus for salvation from sin and
the coming judgment.
Gospel (Romans 1:16;11:28) “Good News:” Paul uses this word
to refer to the wonderful message of forgiveness and eternal life in
Christ.
Grace (Romans 1:5;5:2;12:3) “The unmerited favor of God:”
this term refers to God’s inexplicable giving of good things
(especially salvation) to undeserving people who could never earn
it. Salvation is a free gift made possible by Christ’s death on our
behalf.
Justification (Romans 4:25;5:18) “The act of being declared
righteous:” a legal term used by Paul to describe the spiritual
transaction whereby God (the judge) declares those who trust in
Christ and what He has done for them on the Cross, to be
acceptable before Him. Such a verdict is possible only because
Christ has settled all the claims of the Law against sinners.
Law (Romans 2:12;4:13;7:12;10:4;13:8) “The commandments
given by God:” Paul emphasizes both the holy character of the
Law and the inability of sinful people to live according to it. The
Law becomes a burden and a curse until we allow it to point us to
Christ, who perfectly fulfills all its requirements.

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Propitiation (Romans 3:25) “The satisfaction of God’s holy
wrath against sin:” rebellion against God results in the wrath of
God and must be met with judgment. By dying in our place and
taking our sins upon Himself, Jesus satisfies God’s righteous anger
against all who believe.
Redemption (Romans 3:24;8:23) “The act of freeing someone by
paying a purchase price:” this economic term is used by Paul in a
theological sense to describe how Christ paid the penalty required
by God for our sins (that is, death) by giving His own life on the
Cross. When we believe, Jesus frees us from sin.
Righteousness (Romans 3:5;5:17;9:30) “God’s standard of
purity” or “God’s own truthfulness and faithfulness:” God is
holy, therefore, He cannot tolerate sin. It is through Jesus Christ
that we can find righteousness that is acceptable to God. Christ not
only takes away our sin, but He grants us His perfect purity.
Salvation (Romans 1:16;10:10) “Deliverance:” this word is often
used in the Bible to describe someone being rescued from physical
harm. The word is used by Paul chiefly to denote deliverance from
sin and its deadly consequences.
Sin (Romans 3:9;5:12;7:11;8:2;14:23) “Missing the mark” or
“disobedience to God’s law:” several different Greek words are
used by Paul to describe the tendency of humans to rebel against
God. Sin can be broadly defined as any attitude or action that
opposes the character and will of God. Sin is what brings death-
that is, separation from God.
That my friends, sums up your Salvation. How priceless it is.
You should value your salvation with your life and stake your life

______________________________________________________
on it. No one person or thing can undo what God has done.
Hallelujah!
Now that you have accepted Christ into your life or rededicated
your life back to Christ, it’s time to establish your purpose.
Because once you discover Christ He has a plan and a purpose in
mind for you. The only way to find out why you were created and
why you are here is to know Christ. Without Him it is impossible
to live out your destiny.
Look through your first set of questions in this chapter and pick
out the answers to the questions that came to you the easiest.
These answers should have been some of your natural talents.
Now ask God to anoint these talents. This is the first step to
walking into your calling, your purpose and your season.
Beware of strange people who try to attach themselves to you.
The enemy recognizes that you are ready to fulfill your dreams and
purpose, so he will try and attach ungodly soul ties to you to cause
you to delay your pursuit. Ungodly soul ties enter into your season
with one purpose in mind, and that’s to rob you of your valuables
and replace them with junk. In other words they will come on
board pretending to have answers to unsolved problems, when in
reality they are relying on you and others to bring them success.
Maintaining your season requires strength and endurance,
strength to fight against the enemy and endurance to overcome.
These next sets of questions will show you your weaknesses and
your strengths.
But before answering these questions, pray this prayer with me.
“Father in the name of Jesus I pray for strength and endurance.

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______________________________________________________
Lord I ask that you will guide me through my season. It is my
heart’s desire to please you in all of my endeavors. Let your word
be my protector and attack unseen dangers. At this level God I
trust and depend on you for all of my help. I pray that you would
grant me favor and a peace that surpasses all understanding. In
Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
Watch in anticipation and see how your season will begin to
unfold before your eyes.
Where do you live?
______________________________________________________
Is it suburban or city?
______________________________________________________
Are you acquainted with your neighbors? If no, explain.
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Are you currently on any church committees? If yes, please
explain.
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Who is your mentor?
______________________________________________________

______________________________________________________
Why is this person your mentor?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Are you an only child? Yes _______ No _______
Are you the oldest? Yes _______ No _______
Are you the youngest? Yes _______ No _______
Are you a middle child? Yes _______ No _______
What is your favorite animal?
______________________________________________________
Why is this your favorite animal?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Are you trustworthy? Yes _______ No _______
Can you feel the ice melting? Is your dream finally becoming a
reality? As the ice breaks, open up your heart and let your dreams
unfold.

58 Frozen Dreams
______________________________________________________

______________________________________________________

It’s Your Turn

Chapter Five

Unfolding Season
Let’s define season. According to the Merriam Webster
Dictionary, season means one of the divisions of the year (as in
spring or summer), a special period. Your season is a special
period which God divided from the other times in your life. My
friend you are reading this book because this is your season. This
is your special period. Your spring has come. It’s time to blossom
and move forward. It’s now time for you to apply everything
you’ve learned to your advantage. People, places and things will
begin to come to your memory to help you through the process.
Your season is designed for your success; increased favor will be
bestowed onto you.
This is the time to beware of new attachments or ungodly soul
ties. People want to be involved with people who are going places,
there is nothing wrong with that. But there is something wrong
with those who come to drain you and take from you. If they can’t
add to your success or help push you forward, then they are not

60 Frozen Dreams
______________________________________________________
allowed to be a part of your season. They are simply poisonous
weeds looking to smother and devour the roses. It has nothing to
do with you, but it has everything to do with your season.
Believe it or not your success can start as early as age twelve.
As you have read, around the time of my twelfth year, truth was
being revealed to me and I was able to discern right from wrong.
Unknowingly my season had just begun. Let’s discover the twelfth
year of Jesus’ birth.
Luke 2:41-52 NKJV says, “His parents went to Jerusalem every
year at Feast of the Passover. And when He was twelve years old,
they went up to Jerusalem according to the custom of the feast.
When they had finished the days, as they returned, the Boy Jesus
lingered behind in Jerusalem. And Joseph and His mother did not
know it; but supposing Him to have been in their company, they
went a day’s journey, and sought Him among their relatives and
acquaintances. So when they did not find Him, they returned to
Jerusalem, seeking Him. Now so it was after three days they found
Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both
listening to them and asking them questions. And all who heard
Him were astonished at His understanding and answers. So when
they saw Him, they were amazed: and His mother said to Him,
“Son, why have you done this to us? Look, Your father and I have
sought you anxiously.” And He said to them, “Why did you seek
Me? Did you not know that I must be about My Father’s
business?” But they did not understand the statement, which He
spoke to them. Then He went down with them and came to
Nazareth, and was subject to them, but His mother kept all these

______________________________________________________
things in her heart. And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and
in favor with God and men.”
Can you imagine the fear that gripped the hearts of Jesus’
parents? Where was their precious gift? They must have felt like
He was out of their safety, out of their reach. Jesus was missing for
three days. Mary must have been pacing the floors up all night
wondering where He might have been. We must understand their
actions. Any mother or father would have been worried. After
three long days, Jesus was found at the temple in His Father’s
house sitting among teachers. The teachers were Jewish rabbis.
Jesus was not lecturing, but engaging the rabbis in theological
discussion. Even at the age of twelve, Jesus knew that God had
commissioned Him to accomplish certain tasks on this earth. His
statement, “about My Father’s business” was evidence that He
knew He had a unique mission and a unique relationship to the
Father. His questions to His mother were not disrespect, but were
truth revealed. He was letting her know He knew His purpose. He
then subjected Himself to her authority until it was time to carry
out His mission. As He subjected Himself He grew in wisdom and
knowledge and found favor with God and men.
At the age of twelve you are capable of knowing right from
wrong. You are able to distinguish between a lie and truth. At this
age you are held responsible for your actions. Even Jesus was held
responsible. His mother asked Him questions for an explanation.
Your twelfth year of your life is a new season of new revelations.
To help you break the ice and completely unthaw your dreams,
answer the next set of questions and pray this prayer with me.

62 Frozen Dreams
______________________________________________________
“Father in the name of Jesus I ask that you would reveal to me
the things learned and the things applied to me during this stage of
my life to better equip me for the work of Your Kingdom. Father I
pray for wisdom and knowledge and increase in favor and
understanding. I thank you for allowing me to experience what I
have, and I thank you for bringing me through the fire; your
protective hands lifted me above my storms. In Jesus’ name I pray.
Amen.”
What were your talents at the age of twelve?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
What were your favorite subjects in school?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Were you always into trouble? Yes _______ No _______
What were your dislikes?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Who encouraged you?
______________________________________________________
Who was your favorite teacher?
________________________________
Were you ever in the principal’s office? Yes ______ No ______

______________________________________________________
If yes, please explain.
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
What were some of your struggles?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Do you still struggle with these same issues today?
Yes _____ No _____
What sports did or do you play?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
Did you have many friends? Yes _____ No _______
At the age of twelve who was your best friend? _______________
Why?
______________________________________________________
______________________________________________________
If you have answered all of the questions asked to this point,
then you are halfway through your biography. Have you ever
wanted to write a book on your life and didn’t know how to get
started? Or are you a procrastinator? Now you have a head start.
Surf through your answers and write the first few chapters of your
book. Are you ready for the second half?
Let’s discover the power in submission.

64 Frozen Dreams
______________________________________________________

______________________________________________________

Answer the Call

Chapter Six

Submissive Season
As we have previously read, Jesus was submissive to His
parents. After he submitted to them, He grew in wisdom and
stature. He also received favor from God and men. Submission will
gain you access to the Father, it will also gain you unmerited,
uncommon favor. A person who submits to authority is a humbled
person. Submission allows you to glean from kings and queens. It
also allows you to gain wisdom and knowledge. It’s hard to teach a
person something when they already know everything. Have you
ever known a person who had a story to tell about every topic or
claims to be involved in everything under the sun, or they know
someone who has? This type of person has wisdom but has not
applied that wisdom to their life. Unapplied wisdom does no one
any good. It’s better not to do something because you did not have
the wisdom or knowledge to get it done rather than have wisdom
and knowledge and not apply it. Only a humble, submitted person
can apply wisdom and knowledge to their life. 1 Peter 5:5 says,

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______________________________________________________
“Likewise you younger people, submit yourselves to your elders.
Yes, all of you be submissive to one another, and be clothed with
humility, for God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”
Humble yourselves, show humility and serve your elders. God
especially honors servants; their servant lifestyle pleases Him. It
shows Him their heart. A servant’s heart does the work of the
ministry joyfully, not merely as a duty. Not for dishonest gain.
Christian leaders need to make sure that their work is not
motivated by money, but by a passion for the good of those
believers put in their charge. If you are going to be a leader you
must first be a submitted, humble servant.
Matthew 20:25-28, “But Jesus called them to Himself and said,
“You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and
those who are great exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not
be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you,
let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among
you, let him be your slave just as the Son of man did not come to
be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”
God called His Son to die in order to gain an eternal position
with Him in Heaven. He died to gain. He told His disciples, “I go
to prepare a place for you in my Fathers’ house where there are
many mansions.” Jesus is on an assignment right now for you and
I. He is interceding our case before the Lord. You were called to
serve Christ. He does not require that we return His favor. Yet you
should at least show Him that you are grateful for how He has
served you and you should serve Him. How can you serve the

______________________________________________________
Lord? You can serve Him by following His commandments, and
by studying His teachings and following Him.
In this next phase I will explain to you in detail my calling. As
you read mine, I pray you will find yours.

The Call

As my life progressed with pain and tribulations, I remember
asking God, “Why me?” I began to ask Him questions. If He was
my friend then why did I have to suffer so much rejection? Why
did He take my grandmother? Why did my birth mother walk out
on us? Why do I have to believe in the Jehovah Witness faith?
And why did He allow me to know the truth and not be able to
share it with others? My mind was full of confusions; I had no one
to turn to.
God would always answer, “It’s all for a purpose my child, you
will understand more later.” I wanted to understand now; I didn’t
want to wait until later. But God would say, “Be patient, good
things come to those who wait.”
I felt like I didn’t have a way out. I felt as if I couldn’t turn to
the left or right. No one understood me. I buried my head in my
books and became a straight “A” student. One day when I received
my report card I ran all the way home and rushed through the
doors to show off my success; instead I got disappointed.
My parents said, “Neicy, don’t get caught up in worldly
possessions, only the kingdom of God will last.” Although their
statement was true, I felt like my achievements weren’t

68 Frozen Dreams
______________________________________________________
appreciated. To me this was not the time for religious paranoia.
All I wanted my parents to say was, “Well done.” Instead I took
my grades and placed them back in my pocket and went in my
bedroom and cried all evening.
In the eighth grade and excited about graduation, I couldn’t wait
for my turn to walk across the stage. We practiced our graduation
ceremony for weeks. Everyone was discussing their plans for high
school. Girls were talking about dating and wearing makeup. On
the other hand, I would always talk about schoolwork or what new
classes I wanted to attend. Yes, my friends, as much as I hate to
admit it, I was a nerd, a bookworm, as this was my only outlet or
contact with the “real world.” Graduation day came and went. The
summer had passed, it was now time for me to enter into this
unknown world called high school. But just as I was getting
enrolled into this new high school atmosphere, my dad rushed into
the office. “I’m sorry sir, but she won’t be attending this school,
you’ll have to un-enroll her.”
“Why dad?” I shouted. “What’s going on? I want to go here,
please daddy let me stay.”
“I’m sorry honey, but we’re moving back to Chicago,” he
answered.
“What? But dad, I’ve worked so hard to attend this school.” “I
know honey, but things took a turn for the worse. I lost my job, we
have no other choice.” It felt as if a thousand bricks fell on me at
once. I hung my head down and walked out of the school with my
dad. What’s the point of trying to get somewhere only to get
disappointed again? From that day forward I hated my life. At the

______________________________________________________
age of 13 I felt like failure was a way of life. My theory was: Why
try if it’s not going to work? Therefore, my efforts to succeed
became less and less.
To my surprise, once we got to the car my mom, brothers and
sister were already packed and ready for the road. I didn’t even get
a chance to go back to the house. “Dad, are my things already
packed?” I asked.
“Yes honey, everything is taken care of.” “What’s wrong and
what’s the rush?” I yelled. He only gave me a blank look. I sat
back quietly in the back seat and wished this nightmare would end.
The ride was long and boring; I couldn’t wait for it to end.
When we got to Chicago, we drove in front of this worn down
gray and white two-story building. I felt a sick feeling in my
stomach. The look of the building confirmed my dad’s statements
before leaving Texas.
I was enrolled in Corliss High School. High school was horrible
for me. Girls would make fun of my “no name” clothes and make
rude comments on my “no name” shoes. They were stuck up and
had their choice about whom they wanted to associate with. I
wasn’t one of them. At lunchtime I would sit alone eating my
government bought lunch and would pretend like everything was
okay.
I isolated myself and became very distant, even at home. No
one understood me; no one seemed to care about what I was going
through. On different occasions those feelings about ending my life
would return, but there was always an invisible force around me

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